If you're confused about the last chapter, it's okay...welcome to my world. I don't own Harry Potter or any other piece of literature...well, I bought them, yes, but I don't own the rights. Oo! May 25, 2004 people! The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King COMES OUT ON VIDEO/DVD!!! GOD, I LOVE THOSE PEOPLE! LONG LIVE FRODO! TOLKEIN ROCKS! Oh, dear...I'm sorry about that.
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Ch. 8: Trying
The next full moon came and went without event. Remus remained silent towards Aya, even as Lily yelled at him the next day, making his head swim.
"Idiot! How dare you make her feel alone! You've got your friends to stick by you, but what does she have? If you don't tell her, I will!"
Remus looked away from Lily's glaring eyes, bright and piercing, shifting his feet. "I just can't, Lily," he pleaded, not meeting her gaze.
"Damn excuse! I don't know why I hold back for you. Gah, coward! Bloody coward, that's what you are!" she screamed, then, turning on her heel, left the room, leaving an ashamed Remus on the bed. The rest of the Marauders remained silent as they gazed at the boy, now at war with his emotions.
"Remus..." James began, but Remus cut him off.
"Damn you, James! Not you, too! I don't need to hear this shit from you, alright?" he yelled, getting wearily to his feet before storming out of the room, slamming the door behind him.
Seething with a rage he did not understand, he moved swiftly through the common room, half-expecting Aya to be there. When she wasn't there, his rage exploded. Not really caring what kind of commotion he caused, he knocked over anything and everything in his path, knocking chairs over and flinging paper around. As he reached the portrait hole and climbed through in a huff, it was then that he realized that he was crying.
##
Aya had always loved the woods, the security of the trees, everything. Though she knew the Forbidden Forest was off-limits, she decided to stay on the outskirts of it, enjoying the wonderful Saturday morning sunshine that filtered through the large tree she sat under. Soft grass, a warm breeze, a tree to lean against, and her book. All she needed was a cup of tea to soothe her aching joints from her transformations last night and early that morning, but decided she could go without. Sighing happily, she opened Heretics of Dune once more.
"Softly she called down to him: 'Hey! Old Worm! Was this your design?'
There was no answer but then she had not really expected an answer."
Aya turned the page to nothingness. Shocked, she flipped another page and found the back of the novel staring back at her. I finished, she thought with a pang. It always saddened her to finish a book, but always left her with a feeling of accomplishment. "Next, Chapterhouse: Dune!" she said to no one, laughing aloud. Still laughing, she lay back on the grass, pulling the over-sized sweatshirt she had gotten out of her trunk around her a little tighter, placing the book carefully beside her. Though her jeans were a little on the haggard side, it kept her warm nonetheless.
As she stared up through the tree to the sky, she remembered last night. She had gotten out again, following that odd scent she could never really place. It had been truly wonderful to run through a forest openly again, as she had done as a child. Confinement was not something she liked during a full moon. This time she didn't fight with anything, but that was mainly because nothing had come across her path. She hadn't hunted anything for food, save for that scent that had seemed so familiar to her.
Sighing, she closed her eyes, wondering why she found such freedom during a full moon.
##
Aya woke with an unpleasant start. I fell asleep? I must be more tired than I first thought. Her stomach growled. Sighing, she stood, adjusting her sweatshirt as she gathered her book in her arms, cradling it. Still chastising herself for falling asleep, she moved off towards Hogwarts.
##
"Sorry, guys," Aya said as she sat down at the table, gathering the nearest food. "I overslept and nearly missed breakfast, didn't I?"
Lily nodded, but glanced wearily at Remus, who stared into his plate, knuckles white from clutching his fork too hard. Though she sensed an unrest among her friends, she decided to leave it alone and focused on her meal, carefully stealing a glance every so often at Remus. The boy remained staring at his plate, his food untouched. Aya made to say something to him when a loud voice interrupted her.
"Attention! May I have your attention, please?" It was Dumbledore, who stood up from the teacher's table. There was immediate silence as every head turned his way, attentive. "Well, it seems that we are well on our way into November, and eager for a Hogsmeade visit today," he continued, ignoring the cheer that went up. "However," he said, his tone now oddly serious and slightly displeased, "I must announce that any miscreant behavior," and at this he looked especially to the Marauders, "must be held off for a few days, as we are having...guests at Hogwarts this next week."
There was a hushed silence, and Aya noted how displeased Dumbledore seemed.
"As you are all aware, Ms. Dolores Umbridge has been appointed the new junior undersecretary to our very own Minister of Magic," Dumbledore continued with a subtle tightening of the jaw. Aya's heart jumped to her throat in fear at the name. The rest she heard as if the very words were beaten into her skull. "She and her mother, Mrs. Amelia Umbridge, principle of Llitesat school, will be coming to Hogwarts on a required...inspection. I have been told they will be staying for a few days, so I hope we can all welcome them." Dumbledore sat down amidst the tumult of gossip that arose from the students. He sighed heavily.
Aya felt faint with fear, her face turning ghostly white. Feeling nauseous, she pushed her plate away from her, appetite gone completely. They're coming here, she thought, trembling.
"Llitesat...hey, isn't that your old school, Aya?" Sirius asked.
Aya, feeling sick again, stood up quickly, her feet swaying. "You okay, Aya?" Remus asked her, finally looking up from his plate, concern in his eyes. She didn't answer, but merely left the Great Hall, leaving Lily and the Marauders in a stunned silence.
##
Caring not where she went, Aya moved through the corridor in a daze, sometimes leaning against the wall for support.
They're coming here.
No matter how much distance she could gather, they would always find some way to make her life miserable...again. She had to stop; leaning against the wall, she closed her eyes, fighting back fearful tears as she gripped Heretics of Dune a little tighter to her chest.
They're coming here.
Bad memories surfaced in her mind again, adding to her nausea and exhaustion. Fighting the nausea as best she could, she pushed off from the wall, eager to get to bed.
##
"Aya!" Remus called again, looking frantically down the corridor. Where could she have gone? Why did she look so scared?
He called her name again, louder this time. Nothing answered him, least of all the black-haired girl. Sighing miserably, he sprinted down the corridor, looking right and left each time he rounded a corner. Something moved up ahead of him, someone with familiar black hair.
"Aya!" he called to her, waving his arms. She turned; seeing him, she frantically wiped away her tears, then met him with a smile.
"Hello, Remus," she said in as cheerful a voice as she could.
He stopped, slightly panting. "Aya, are you okay? You left in such a rush, and you looked so sick all of a sudden," he said, catching his breath. As he looked at her, he noticed her red, puffy eyes. "You've been crying." It was not a question.
Blushing, she stuttered, "What? No I haven't...I...um...why would you say that?"
He stepped closer to her, his eyes narrowing in suspicion. "Something's wrong. What's going on?" he pressed.
"What? That's a funny thing to say," she replied with a hesitant laugh. "Besides, shouldn't you be getting ready to go to Hogsmeade today?" She was desperate to change the subject.
"Amelia and Dolores Umbridge. This has something to do with them, doesn't it?" he pressed a little further, ignoring her switch in the subject. He noted how she paled slightly as she took another step back.
"I don't...understand," she whispered, but knew he didn't believe her for a moment.
"Aya...if there's something wrong, tell me."
She took another step back, ashamed of the fresh tears that fell down her face. I would...have to tell him everything about me. I can't do that. He wouldn't accept me, like all the others, she thought, a pain in her heart. "It's...nothing."
"Bull shit!"
His cry shocked her to absolute silence as she stared at her feet, still ashamed of her tears. Grasping her hand, he pulled her gently down the corridor and down the stairs. She looked up at his face as she followed and was about to say something, but the grim set of his face kept her silent. She stared at her feet again, allowing herself to be lead like a dog.
Rounding a corner, they came upon a rather ugly looking statue: a hump-backed witch. Looking around carefully, he moved to the back of the statue, feeling around in the back, looking for the secret switch.
"Remus, what're you doing?" Aya asked, feeling like an idiot.
"Sh...someone might hear you," Remus whispered back.
Has he gone mad?
Aya sighed.
Perhaps not.
"Ah, here it is!" Remus whispered as he pressed the switch. As Aya gazed in shock, the statue split in two, then seemed to melt away into the wall. The wall then also melted away to show an oaken door of some six feet in height.
"Okay, enough of this. What is going on?!" Aya cried, taking a step back.
Grabbing her hand, he whispered, "Come on, quickly now!" He opened the door to a dimly lit room, pulling her in with him before he shut the door behind him. With a quick glance at his watch, he muttered, "Damn...I've got only ten minutes until we leave for Hogsmeade. I don't have time now to tell her, but maybe..."
"Remus, what the hell is going on?" Aya asked, her voice shaking a little, her composure lost.
Looking up, he replied, "Well, I wanted to tell you something important, but now I see I don't have time."
"Ooookaaay," she replied slowly, eyeing him. "So, why did you bring me here, exactly?"
"Because this is a private matter, which requires a private room," Remus said matter-of-factly. "This is one of the many secret rooms and corridors the Marauders and I have found over the years. Most we've labeled on the Marauder's Map, but we know them by heart now; James and Sirius want to 'pass on the knowledge,' so to speak. I could care less." He knew he was getting nervous and was grateful he didn't have to tell her now.
"So, why am I brought here, exactly? What did you want to tell me?" she asked, her voice calm and composed again. Her eyes sparkled with such intensity that they enraptured Remus.
"Well, for privacy. I know we have to leave in about two minutes, so I don't have enough time. And I don't feel comfortable in Hogsmeade either," Remus said slowly. "So, now I'm stuck."
She giggled suddenly, her eyes full of mirth as she placed a hand over her mouth. "A secret meeting in the dead of night?" she laughed.
"That just might work!" Remus cried, snapping his fingers for emphasis.
Eyes widening, she replied, "I was just kidding."
"Well, I'm not. Fine, then. Meet me in the common room at midnight tonight. I have some...things...to tell you. And then you can tell me about those Umbridge people," he said, noticing her flinch. "Come on, we're gonna be late." He grabbed her hand and led her out, pressing the switch to reassemble the wall before hurrying off to join the throng of students accumulating at the front gates.
As she ran next to him, she thought, What a week I'm having.
##
"Let's go to Honeydukes, guys!" Lily said, clapping her hands with delight. "Please? Aya hasn't been there!"
"Aya hasn't been anywhere in Hogsmeade, Lily," James replied. "But, sure, let's go to Honeydukes."
The afternoon sun shone happily on the six friends who now moved off at a swift pace towards the candy shop. Aya, though enjoying Hogsmeade, walked at a slow pace, still recovering from Dumbledore's announcement at breakfast. And now Remus had to tell her something important in the middle of the night. She sighed, wondering why he wanted it to be so secret.
"Are you coming inside or not, Aya?" Lily asked as she stood in the doorway to Honeyduke's. Drawn back to reality, Aya looked up, smiled, and walked in.
The shelves were covered in every sort of candy known to both Muggle (and those were very few) and the Wizarding World (much more than the Muggle's fair share). Aya was taken aback at how laden each shelve was, and by the diversity of each sweet. Sugar quills; chocolate frogs; candies that made you levitate; some that made you laugh for hours; others that made you burp uncontrollably (located in the "Pranks" section); and another gas-related candy that truly will not be mentioned. There were chocolate seeds that could be planted to make chocolate roses; life-size chocolate brooms that really worked (considered a danger to the hungry Quidditch player); and, of course, Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans.
Both Sirius and James were filling their bags full with all sorts of candy, grinning from ear to ear. Remus was scanning the shelves with a gleeful smile; he loved candy with an absolute passion. The chocolate roses, freshly grown for the rather impatient wizard, caught his eye. Their red color reminded him of the color of Aya's cheeks when she blushed. Smiling, he chose the prettiest one, fingering it slightly as he made his way to the cash register, grateful to get there before Sirius and James. He knew full well how long he would have to wait behind them, and pitied any poor soul that would fall into such a predicament.
As he purchased the treasure, he glanced at Aya, who was gazing at the chocolate roses as she leaned against a shelf. Grinning triumphantly, he gathered his change and purchase, then moved slowly behind her, holding the rose at his back.
"Aya?" he said, tapping her shoulder. As she turned, he held the rose in front of him, relishing in her joyful expression. "For you."
"Oh, thank you!" she whispered happily, then kissed him quickly on the cheek. He trembled with happiness, enjoying that blush of hers as she drew back.
Unbeknownst to the two, Lily watched them with a knowing smile.
##
"I think," Sirius said through a mouthful of chocolate frog, "that we should go to Zonko's." He took another large bite of chocolate. "'Sides, I nee' to stock up'n m'supply."
Lily, rolling her eyes, retorted, "What more of those crazy things would you want to get? The last time we went to Zonko's and you got a large purchase, I remember quite well how you messed up Transfiguration class with that whirring thing that roared like a lion."
Shrugging, he moved off to the shop, head held high. "I will never understand that boy," Lily muttered, shaking her head. "And, no, James. I forbid you to go."
James gave Lily a pleading look, eyes shining behind his glasses. When there was no sign of emotion from Lily, he stuck out his lower lip and looked as sad as possible. "No," Lily said firmly, crossing her arms. Getting desperate, he got down on his knees, hands clasped before him, begging to go. "No!" she said again, her voice nearly cracking with contained laughter.
At a loss, James crawled to her feet and clung to them for dear life, pretending to whine like a wounded puppy, pulling at the hem of her cloak. "All right, all right!" she called with a laugh, shaking him off. "You can go, you can go! Be off with you, foul demon, and trouble me no more!"
Laughing, he stood and drew her into a long kiss until she pushed him off, giggling. Putting his hands on his hips in defeat, James turned to Peter and Remus, saying, "Now, which of you wants to come with us?"
Both boys put their hands up in defense while Remus retorted, "Oh, no! There's no way I'm being your guinea pig this time! Last time we went, I had to test every single one of your purchases."
Frowning, James replied, "You weren't a guinea pig, you were...just given an opportunity. Well, if you won't come, then Wormtail does." Before poor Peter could protest, James, cackling madly, grabbed the boy by the arm and dragged him kicking and screaming to the shop.
"Poor Wormtail," Remus said, placing his hand over his heart and bowing. "We knew him well."
"Oh, stop it," Lily said, slugging him on the arm. "Let's go do something fun."
"Can we go there?" Aya asked, pointing to an old shop.
"The book shop? That thing's older than old," Lily said, turning to her with an arched eyebrow.
"Well, I think we should go," Remus replied, "so let's go." Grabbing Aya's hand, he led her over to the shop.
"Well, if Lily doesn't want to," Aya said as she was half-dragged to the shop, "we don't really have to."
"Nonsense," Remus replied. "Come on, Lily, or you'll be left behind." Sighing, she followed.
"As long as we get to go to the Three Broomsticks for some butterbeer, I'll be fine," she called.
##
To poor Lily, the old shop smelled of mildew and old people. Aya, however, relished in the scent, the wonderful smell of old books. She sighed happily as Remus squeezed her hand. Turning to Lily, who still stood in the doorway, Remus called, "You can go to the Three Broomsticks if you want, but Aya and I are gonna look around for a bit."
Sighing, Lily moved into the shop. "I don't want to go by myself," she said unhappily. Remus was about to reply, when Aya, letting go of his hand, moved off down the rows of books, her eyes dancing. "Don't get lost," Lily said with a grin, leaning against the door. Let them be alone, that's the ticket, she thought happily. She loved playing matchmaker.
Aya scanned the shelves upon shelves of books until she came across the section she had been looking for: science fiction. She was grateful that a store such as this would carry Muggle-written books. Crouching down low, she searched under H, gently gliding her finger along each novel.
From a distance, Remus, leaning against the book shelf, smiled as he watched her.
There it is, she thought happily as she drew the book out. "Chapterhouse: Dune," she whispered happily. It was the final installment to Frank Herbert's Dune series. She flipped the book over to glance at the price tag. Five galleons and two Sickles. Can I afford that? Still holding onto the book, she rummaged in her pocket for the necessary coins, then drew out her meager savings, counting them. Oh, no...I've got two Galleons and one Knut. Dammit.
Sighing heavily, she placed the book back on the shelf, then slipped her money back into her pocket. Turning slowly, she saw Remus, who had now quickly busied himself in a random book. "Are you ready to go?" she asked, her voice betraying disappointment.
"Almost. Why don't you get Lily out of here before she passes out with boredom? I'll get the guys, and then meet you at the Three Broomsticks. Lily knows where it is," he replied. Something in his eyes betrayed something else, but she shrugged it off and agreed.
##
"So, what is this Three Broomsticks I've been hearing so much about?" Aya asked Lily as they made their way over to the fabled Inn.
"You'll see. They've got great butterbeer...the best there is," Lily replied with a smile. Aya pulled her school robe a little tighter around her to shield herself from the cold wind that came in; inwardly, she thanked her luck that her shoes, though long-since worn out, kept her feet warm, despite the uncomfortable lack of socks.
"There it is!" Lily pointed out suddenly, raising her finger to the famous tavern. Clapping her hands with delight, she grabbed Aya's hand, crying, "Come on! The sooner we get there, the sooner we can get out of this cold."
##
"What's with the package, Moony?" James asked as he shifted his purchases to his other arm. Sirius, who had been preoccupied with a rather evil-looking mini explosive, looked up. Peter, still recovering from Sirius' Mini-Dragon-In-A-Box ploy, remained indifferent, his eye slightly twitching as he stared at the ground.
Remus shrugged and moved on at a quicker pace down the road, his blush truly apparent. With a devilish air, Sirius snatched the package from Remus in a flash, then drew it out of its bag. "'Chapterhouse: Dune by Frank Herbert,'" he read. "Don't you already have that book?"
His blush deepening, Remus stuttered, "Well...I thought I should get a new one, you know? Mine's so...beat up and stuff."
"Beat up?" James said, raising a mock eyebrow while Sirius nearly collapsed with laughter. "You just bought that one last summer. You barely even touched it! Come off it, whom is it for?"
"I bet," Sirius choked out, tears of mirth streaming down his face, "it's for Aya!" He threw back his head and howled with laughter.
His face beet red, Remus stuttered out, "N-no! No, it's...not...stop laughing! Maybe, okay? I said maybe! Shut up, all of you!" Even Peter was roaring with laughter. Enraged, Remus snatched the book from Sirius' helpless hands, carefully replaced the precious item, and moved off at a quickened pace, his head held high.
"Hurry up, now, Mr. Moony! Don't keep your love waiting!" Sirius roared, slapping his knee and holding his side in laughter.
Bloody morons, Remus thought as he pushed the doors leading into the Three Broomsticks open with an unusual amount of force.
##
"Remus! Hey, over here!" Lily yelled over the din, waving her arms about. Turning to her, his heart gave a pleasant flutter as he saw Aya; he enjoyed how the filtered light made her hair shine and her eyes sparkle. Quickly putting his present in his pocket, he sighed happily as he moved over to the table.
"You guys order yet?" he asked as he sat down as close as he possibly could to his dark-haired girl.
"Yeah, six butterbeers and a few scones to pass around," Lily said, sitting back down again. "Where're the guys?"
Frowning, he said, "The morons are coming in soon." He ignored the questioning glance between Aya and Lily and instead leaned forward on the table, drumming his fingers on it.
As Remus had predicted, the "morons" came in with a confident, happy air about them. Sirius, as he sat down at the table, gave a knowing wink to the fuming Remus.
Leaning forward from where he sat next to Lily, James said, "I just love presents, don't you, Remus?"
"What are you babbling about now, James?" Lily said, giving him a playful shove.
"Ah, down, down, woman! Your knight still has to protect thee from the evil that is afoot in these here esteemed places of old," James said, laughing as he kissed the girl.
Gritting his teeth, Remus, staring at his lap, muttered under his breath, "Evil in the form of my fist."
##
The companions spent a great deal of time in the Three Broomsticks; as Sirius told one of James' more embarrassing moments at Hogwarts, the whole table, excluding James, ended up in fits of laughter.
"You...you got," Lily choked out, tears streaming down her face, "locked...in the girl's...toilet for over an hour? And this was all Sirius' idea?!" She laughed again, banging her hand on the table for support. James, his face dark red, glared at Sirius with such hate that would have sent any person with an inch of sense diving for cover and praying for mercy.
"Sure," James said, his voice hoarse with hate and embarrassment. "You could say that. But, if I recall rightly, it was dear Sirius who slipped down the stairs into the common room in his teddy bear underwear."
Everyone, now excluding Sirius, nearly died with laughter. "They weren't teddy bears! And I was a first year! A first year! Hey, are you listening to me? Shut up, will you?"
"Oh, man," James choked out, recovering. "Good times." Glancing at his watch, he nearly cried out in surprise. "We better go, or we'll be late getting back to school."
##
While the others raced ahead, Remus walked beside Aya at a slow pace, relishing in the moment at hand. He felt confident and almost reckless, as if he could do anything at the moment. It was then that he realized his hand was sneaking into his pocket to grab the hidden book, his fingers wrapping confidently around it as he drew it out of his pocket. Breathing deeply for calm, he grabbed Aya by the hand, stopping her.
"Here," he said, pressing the present into her hand. "I want you to have this."
"What is it?" she asked, taking the bag in both hands.
"Open it," he replied, putting his hands behind his back and kicking at the ground. Aya drew a gasp of surprise as she drew the book out of the bag, then laughed happily.
"Chapterhouse: Dune! I can't believe it! How did you know, Remus?"
Blushing a little, he said slowly, "I saw you looking at it in the bookshop, so I thought I would get it for you."
Giggling, she hugged him. "Thank you," she whispered as she kissed him. "Thank you so much for today, Remus."
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Waichiwah! I love writing this story...you guys are the best! Tell me what you think! Your feedback is what keeps me going. FRODO LIVES.