The Eye Of The Gazer
Chapter 8
Lucius had made his plans carefully. It was years since he had deflowered a virgin, and he was determined that the experience should be memorable in the most positive way for both Jane and himself. He felt both excited and aroused in a way he had not done for so long, yet also recognised another feeling with which he was not at all familiar: nervousness. He had not had a woman at all for three years. He was not worried about his ability to perform, he was hard now from merely contemplating the evening; but the idea of exposing his scars to a feminine gaze brought unwelcome thoughts, and he dreaded the possibility of rejection. He thrust the subject from his mind, and concentrated on ensuring that the table was set to perfection by the house elves: sparkling crystal glasses, shining white china with the Malfoy crest in dark green, and gleaming silver cutlery on a creamy white damask tablecloth followed a tirade of threats and curses.
At seven o'clock precisely, Jane Currer appeared just inside the door of Lucius' study at Malfoy Manor. He had decided they should dine there, for the room was both familiar to Jane, and cosier than the large formal dining room which would be far too overwhelming. Jane was carrying a slender pale green onyx bud vase in her hand: for Lucius had presented it to Jane as a gift, and enchanted it as a Portkey for her. Jane was not adept at apparating, and Lucius, knowing she would take care with her appearance tonight, wished to save her from travelling via the floo network: for not all wizards were careful to sweep their fireplaces regularly, and some journeys by this method meant that one sometimes arrived at one's destination in less than pristine condition.
Lucius firstly stood looking at Jane to see how she had chosen to present herself. He was pleased by what he saw: she had discarded her usual subdued greys and dark blues for a gown of smoky mauve silk, cut so that it emphasised her small waist, with a sweetheart neckline that was much more flattering to her graceful neck than her usual attire, and drew his eyes towards the swell of her breasts. Also, she had changed her hairstyle, and instead of the primness of her usual governess's neat bun, Jane had tied her hair in a pony tail high on her head with a length of ribbon to match her dress, so that long, silky brown tresses fell over her shoulders. She stood, and smiled uncertainly at Lucius.
He walked towards her, and bowed gracefully, taking her hand and kissing it gallantly. "You look lovely, my dear," he murmured. He then presented her with a perfect bloom: a white rose tinged with pink, just opening from its bud. He took the bud vase from her, filled it from a jug of water standing on the sideboard, and then set the flower in the vase in the centre of the small dining table. This was all done with such practised ease, Jane wondered how often he had done it before.
Lucius led her to their usual chairs by the fire, hoping that this would put Jane at her ease. "An aperitif, my dear?" he asked her. Jane looked uncertain, and began to blush.
"Sir – I mean Lucius – I am unaccustomed to drink much alcohol. I do not wish to be too – er – I mean…"
"I understand perfectly, my dear. Perhaps a glass of fresh fruit juice for now? I trust you will take a little wine with your meal though? Just enough to help you relax, but not too much to mar your full enjoyment of the evening. I believe that was your meaning?"
Jane nodded, completely speechless. Lucius sat opposite her. He must be careful not to scare her: he could see she was so nervous that she was almost shaking. He rang for a house elf, ordered Jane's fruit juice, and instructed him to serve dinner in twenty minutes. Lucius then poured himself a Glen Foy single malt, and deliberately talked of inconsequential things until he saw Jane relax a little. She then began to converse with him in her usual way.
Lucius kept one eye on the timepiece on the wall, and as the time for the meal approached, he turned to Jane and said, "I have a surprise for you for dinner. I hope you will enjoy it. Do you trust me?"
"Trust you, Lucius? What do you mean?"
"Will you permit me to blindfold you so that I can prolong the surprise? I will be very gentle, I promise."
Jane looked uncertain, then, intrigued, she agreed. Lucius led her to the table. He produced a length of black silk, showed it to her, and then wrapped it round her eyes. "Can you see, Jane?" "No, Sir."
Lucius then took a large creamy damask napkin, and arranged it around Jane's neck in the way one would protect a child's clothing at mealtimes, tying it at the back. "I see that you are wearing a very lovely silk tonight, Jane, and I would not wish you to spoil it, so please allow me to tie your napkin so," he said as he did it. He placed a second napkin on her lap. He then took her hand, and sat beside her, for the two dining chairs had been arranged so that they were either side of a corner of the small table. Lucius waited patiently for the house elves, talking quietly to Jane all the while, aware that a blindfold can be very disorienting. He could tell she was no longer quite so tense, her interest had been piqued.
The house elves entered, arranged the food on the table, and left. Lucius watched Jane inhaling deeply, and wondered if she had guessed what he was about to serve her. "Open your mouth, Jane," he instructed, and placed a morsel of food on her tongue. He held his breath. There was a risk that he had guessed wrongly, and she would hate it -he had a back-up menu arranged just in case. Jane chewed, and swallowed. A huge smile appeared on her face.
"A mussel! I love mussels, how did you know?"
"I didn't, I took a gamble," replied Lucius, as he stood behind Jane's chair and carefully removed her blindfold without ruffling her hair. Lucius had thought long and hard about what to feed Jane. Oysters had occurred to him, with their aphrodisiac reputation: but that seemed too crass and obvious, and he was not sure if she would like raw shellfish. But then he had a brainwave: Jane had lived in Brussels, and his culinary memories of Brussels, apart from the ubiquitous pommes frites, were of delicious seafood. Mussels! He would serve her moules mariniere, to remind her of her temporary home.
Jane could now see the huge pewter bucket of mussels gently steaming in the centre of the table, with a platter of sliced crusty French baguette beside it, and a large bowl of crisp salad. "Eat!" commanded Lucius. He could not have made a better choice, for it is impossible to be over genteel when eating shellfish with one's fingers. Jane helped herself, using an empty mussel shell to pick the next mussel from its blue carapace, unpretentiously enjoying herself, ignoring the liquor that ran down her chin, and using the bread to soak up the delicious wine sauce. Lucius also noted with approval that Jane was happy to accept a glass or two of crisp, chilled white wine as an accompaniment, and she laughed when their hands collided in the shellfish bucket. He watched her carefully, to ensure that she did not accidentally overindulge in the unaccustomed alcohol, but encouraged her to take just enough to release her inhibitions.
When the contents of the bucket had been devoured, Lucius smiled at Jane, watching her rinse her fingers in the fingerbowl. He then wiped her mouth and chin with her napkin, removed it from her neck, and leaned over and kissed her deeply, tasting the moules and the wine on her tongue. She responded willingly.
"Now, my sweet Jane, would you like a dessert?" Lucius said this in such a way that Jane looked at him in slight confusion.
"Lucius, are you teasing me? Is there a dessert, or – are you the dessert?"
Lucius pulled her closer, kissed her once more, and traced his fingers around the sweetheart neckline. She shivered slightly. "Ah, my sweet Jane. Yes, I am teasing you a little. There are three choices: we may eat dessert now; we may have each other for dessert now; or we may have each other for dessert, and then eat dessert afterwards. What would you like to do, my sweet girl? This night is for you, so you may choose. If you are not yet ready for love, we may also sit a while longer by the fire. What will you?" He slid his fingers just inside the neckline of her dress, and waited for her reaction.
Jane took a deep breath. "Lucius, I would like you for dessert. Please." Her eyes were huge, as if she could not believe her own boldness. Lucius almost smirked. He stood, helped Jane to her feet, opened the study door, and then swept her into his arms, and carried her up the stairs.
In his bedroom, Lucius set Jane down on a sofa. He saw her eyes turn towards the bed, and suddenly she began to tremble again. Lucius closed the door, and came to sit beside her. He took her hands in his, noticing that they too were shaking, and were cold to the touch.
"Look at me, Jane," he said softly. Almost reluctantly, Jane gazed up at him with enormous eyes through her lashes.
"Do you trust me, Jane?" he asked her once more.
"Yes, Sir."
"Jane, you do not have to do this. I told you, you may change your mind at any time. Do you want to go home?"
"N-n-no, Sir."
"You are afraid. Are you afraid of me?"
Jane looked unsure how to answer this. Lucius waited patiently. Then he said, "Tell me if I am wrong. You are a little afraid of me, but mainly because you are afraid of what we are about to do. Are you afraid of being hurt?"
Jane nodded, reluctantly. "They say it hurts, the first time."
Lucius nodded. "They do say so. I am not a woman, so I cannot say for certain, but I will tell you what I have seen. There are some for whom it does hurt, and some for whom it does not. But I believe two things: that it hurts less or not at all if one has a considerate lover; and that the pain is soon forgotten if the pleasure is great enough.
"Jane, don't worry. Allow me to give you this greatest of all pleasures. I will do my utmost to see that there is no pain. If I do anything you dislike, you must tell me. I will not be offended. Let us start slowly. We have all night. If in the end you decide against making love, it will be enough to have you lying in my arms. I am not such a beast that I cannot control my urges. We will do just as much and no more than you desire."
Jane nodded, her eyes wet with tears. Lucius slid an arm around her, and kissed her. He attempted nothing further than a deeply passionate embrace until he felt her relax again. Then he allowed his fingers to tease Jane around the neckline of her dress once more, and kissed her neck and shoulders. He felt her shiver, but this time with desire. Lucius then put his hand gently on one of Jane's breasts, feeling the warmth of her body through the fabric. He could tell that her nipple was already taut, and he flicked a fingertip across it. Jane's eyes opened wide in shocked response. He watched her carefully, but he could see that she did not want him to stop, for she thrust her breast into his hand, and moaned softly. Lucius himself was already hard, his manhood straining against his breeches, but he was happy to take it slowly, and savour each touch.
"Jane, may I undo your gown?" he asked her when they broke apart from the next kiss. She blushed, but nodded. She sat erect, and turned her back to him, in order to allow Lucius to undo the fastenings to her waist. He slid the dress off her shoulders, and as he did so, he kissed the back of her neck and shoulders and nuzzled her ear. He was a little surprised to see that Jane's torso was naked under her gown, although he had guessed as much from the prominence of her nipples. Nipping her shoulder gently with his teeth, Lucius whispered, "Well, well, Jane. There's a surprise! My virginal governess is wearing no bra! You shock me! And are you also similarly naked from the waist down?"
"No, Lucius, I am not quite so bold as that. I confess I chose not to wear a bra because I own nothing glamorous that would suit the occasion. Also – well I knew it would be removed anyway…" Jane giggled almost coquettishly, and turned to look at him over her shoulder, slightly uncertain. Lucius smiled widely in amusement. "Well answered!" he replied. He slid his arms slowly around her waist, and lifted them until he held a breast in each hand. He waited a moment, enjoying their weight and the feel of her young, silky skin. When Jane did not object, he played gently with her breasts while kissing her neck and shoulders, finally concentrating his fingers on her hard, erect nipples. In response, she sighed, pressing her nipples into his touch, and arching her neck so that he could kiss the hollow by her collar bone.
"Now Jane, turn and face me," commanded Lucius quietly, as he released her.
Jane did so, but she could not look at him, she was so embarrassed to sit before a man with her breasts naked. Lucius pulled her towards him, and kissed her again, waiting once more for the tension to leave her. Not until he felt her relax did he once more cup one of her breasts in his hand, savouring the feel of the soft, smooth skin and the hard nipple against his palm. He then drew back and looked at her approvingly. This time, she held his gaze, although she flushed prettily.
"Jane, do not be ashamed. You have beautiful breasts," said Lucius, running his fingers gently over the pink areolas surrounding her nipples. He bent down and took one nipple in his mouth, and was gratified to hear the sigh she gave in response. She held his head in her hands, stroking his silver hair, and leaned back against the cushions to allow him easier access. He then gave her second breast the same treatment, and asked her teasingly, "Did you like that?"
"Oh, yes. I never imagined it could feel that way!"
"And does it make you feel ready for more?"
"Yes, it creates such feelings in me. I do not know how to describe it."
"Stand up."
She stood. Her eyes never left his face: it seemed to be the one way she could control her embarrassment, to look into his grey eyes with hers. Lucius stood too. Jane was so small beside him, her head reached only to his chest. Lucius suddenly crushed her to him, and she too clung to him as if she would never let him go. He then released her, and looking over her shoulder, he finished unfastening the back of Jane's dress, and stood back from her, releasing her arms from around him. Her gown slid to the floor and lay in a mauve silken pool around her feet, while Jane, stepping out of her shoes and the fallen dress, stood before him, naked save for a pair of matching silk cami-knickers. Lucius was intrigued.
"Jane, may I ask why a woman who, according to her own admission, does not possess a bra glamorous enough for such an occasion as this, at the same time owns a pair of silk knickers that match her best dress, and seem very suitable indeed for such an occasion?" He put his head on one side, and looked at her, amused.
"It's simple, Lucius," replied Jane, smiling. "I bought a bolt of silk for the dressmaker to make the dress. There was a little left over. Rather than waste it, I had her make me a few pairs of cami-knickers from the remnant. I find the silk very comfortable against my skin, so it was thrift and comfort rather than glamour that guided me."
Lucius noted that this teasing altercation had distracted Jane from the fact that she was standing almost naked in front of a man. He drank in the sight of her before she remembered to be embarrassed. "Jane, you are beautiful unclothed," he told her. She blushed now, and tried to dismiss his remark. "Please Lucius, don't tease me. I know I am not beautiful. You once yourself called me plain."
Lucius shook his head. "No Jane, you are not plain at all. It was I who was blind. Of course, you did not help yourself, for you always dress in such a way as to hide your best assets, and you wear your hair hidden away too. But I see you now as nature intended. No, my dear, do not try to cover yourself with your hands, for your body is indeed beautiful. You are young, you have the smooth, soft skin of youth, your shape is so pleasing to the eyes, your hair is so much prettier worn that way. Stand tall, Jane, be proud of the way you are made."
He saw she was pleased by his words, but uncomfortable under his scrutiny. He relented, and took her hand. "Come to bed, Jane," he whispered. He wrapped her in his arms, one hand firmly on her behind, the other around her shoulders, and kissed her deeply once more. When he broke away, she was trembling again.
"Are you cold, Jane?"
"No, Sir. I am – I don't know…"
"Frightened still?"
"Only a little."
"Come to bed with me. Do you still want to?"
"Yes, Lucius."
He led her to the four-poster bed, and folded back the covers to reveal white silk sheets. She stood uncertainly, waiting. Lucius decided to act, and see if she objected. He knelt before her, and kissed her breasts again, drawing his nails caressingly across her back. Again he waited for Jane to relax into his touch, for her to respond and push herself towards him, then he moved his hands downwards, and smoothly slid her cami-knickers down to her ankles.
"Step out of them, Jane." She did so. Now Jane's face was crimson with confusion. Lucius did not want her to become too cold, so he resisted his immediate impulses, and guided her into the bed, firstly removing the warming pan that a house elf had placed there. He covered her, and turned away from her to remove his boots. He was about to remove his breeches, when Jane called to him gently.
"Lucius. Please, let me look at you. I want to see you too."
Lucius swallowed. He was still wearing his soft pale green cambric shirt. He turned to her. "May I make a request of you, Jane? Please allow me to keep on my shirt for the present. I promise I will show you later, but you understand, no woman has seen my scars since they were made. I am sorry, I cannot bear for you to see me just now. But you may see the lower part of my body. Of that I am not ashamed."
So saying, he came to stand by Jane's side, and unbuttoning his breeches, he removed them swiftly, and stood beside her. There was no hiding the fact that he was aroused, for his erection stood out proudly from the silver curls of his pubic hair. Jane gazed at it with undisguised curiosity. She put out her hand, then withdrew it, embarrassed. Lucius took her hand in his, and placed it firmly on his member. He sighed involuntarily as he felt her touch, Jane's cool fingers caressing his length, making him want to have her there and then. Jane looked up at his face. "Is that nice for you?" she asked him. Had another woman asked him this, it would have been a teasing remark, but Jane was genuinely curious: she really had no knowledge of the effect she was having on him.
"Jane, my dear, it is exceedingly nice – in fact you had better stop, or I will come in your hand here and now." He removed her hand, and moved to the other side of the bed to climb in beside her. He arranged himself with one arm around her, and began to explore Jane's naked body with his free hand. Any time he felt her tense up, he kissed her into limp submission, then moved to kiss her neck, her shoulders, her breasts, her belly. Eventually, he slipped his hand between her legs, to find that, as he had expected, Jane was slick with longing for him. He teased her around her vaginal opening for a while, whispering to her to open her legs wider, then slipped two fingers inside, sliding them in deeply, and curving them around to reach her G spot.
Jane was shocked, aroused, and embarrassed all at once. Lucius saw the confusion in her eyes. She did not know whether to tell him to stop, or to beg him not to. He smiled at her, and whispered, "Jane, do you want this?" at the same time massaging her G spot so that her body screamed at him to continue.
"Lucius, it hurts in a way, but it feels so wonderful at the same time. Is it supposed to feel like this? Lucius, is it – normal – to put your fingers inside me? I thought you were supposed to put your – er – yourself inside me?"
"Jane dearest, have no fear, relax, eventually I will put 'myself' inside you! Is it normal? Yes, it's perfectly normal, if you enjoy it. Ask yourself: which is the stronger feeling – hurting or enjoyment? If you do not like this, I will stop. You need only say the word."
"I think I like it – but it also leaves me feeling as if something is missing."
Lucius adjusted his hand so that he could both massage Jane's G spot with his fingers, and stroke her clitoris lightly with his thumb. "Is that what was missing?" But Jane was now really speechless, for she gasped loudly at his touch; but he could tell that she did not want him to stop, for she spread her legs far apart, and angled her hips so that he touched her even more accurately. Her breathing became ragged, she began to shake as her climax approached. Lucius kissed her nearest nipple, nipping it gently with his teeth, and continued his massaging, faster and faster. He felt that Jane was almost there, and concentrated on putting his fingers in just the right place at the right time. He smiled smugly to himself as she came hard against his hand, crying out involuntarily, her vaginal walls contracting around his fingers, her clitoris engorged, her body shuddering violently as her orgasm engulfed her whole concentration. He kept his fingers in place for a long time, then withdrew his hand, and wrapped her in both his arms. Her eyes were tightly shut, and he knew exactly where her stunned mind was. He allowed himself a small feeling of triumph, and waited patiently for Jane to cease her shaking and open her eyes.
Eventually, she looked at him. Her eyes were wet with tears once more. He had no need to ask her if she had enjoyed the experience, her body radiated sexual satisfaction. "Thank you," she whispered. "I never guessed it would be like that. It was wonderful."
"It is better with a partner than alone," he agreed. Then he looked at her again, and asked her wonderingly, "Jane, did you never pleasure yourself? Is this truly the first time you ever had an orgasm?"
"Yes, Lucius, this was truly my first time for everything. But Lucius, what about.." she stopped in confusion, for she could not think of the words.
"What about full sexual intercourse, is what you mean, I believe?" replied Lucius gravely, but with a twinkle in his eyes.
"Yes."
"Do you still want it?"
"I want you to be happy too. It seems unfair that I … while you…."
"Yes, indeed. Unhappy is the man who is left frustrated." He was laughing at her now, but not unkindly. "Jane, some women like it too I believe," he added, "It is not designed only for the accommodation of men's insatiable lust."
Jane was laughing too now, he was pleased to see. He did not wish her to tense up again. "Well then!" he said, "Let's do it! Open your legs you wanton witch!"
Giggling still, Jane lay on her back, and opened her legs as commanded. Lucius knelt between her thighs. He took Jane's hand and placed it on his member, and showed her how to massage him so that he stiffened rapidly once more. When he was completely hard, he removed her hand, then guided himself slowly into her. She was so wet from her orgasm that he slid in easily. He buried himself deeply in Jane's welcoming body as far as he could, sighing at this feeling he had not enjoyed for so long. He supported himself on his elbows, and looked into Jane's face. "Well, my dear, is it as awful as you feared?"
"No, Lucius. It feels so nice. And it didn't hurt at all." She put her arms around him, sliding her hands under his shirt to stroke his back. Lucius winced slightly as she touched the tender skin of his scars, but made himself concentrate on the pleasure of her loving hands and the feeling of her tight vagina squeezing his manhood.
Lucius began to thrust himself into Jane, gently at first to gauge her reaction, then more rapidly as he saw her eyes close, and felt her body responding beneath him. She wrapped her legs around him, trying to expose herself further to him, and her hands gripped his back. She began to match him stroke for stroke as he built up his pace. Then he knew he was about to peak, and he exploded into her, pleasure engulfing his every sense. For a moment Jane lay still, then her body responded instinctively, and she gasped as she contracted around him in time with his own shudders, prolonging his climax. When Lucius was completely spent, he leered at her.
"You see, Miss Jane. There is more than one way to have an orgasm. I hope you enjoyed having double the pleasure?"
"Lucius, I didn't expect it at all. It was so different from the first time. Of course it was wonderful too, you know it was."
"Ah, my dear, you have a whole education in front of you. That is, if you like the methods of your teacher enough to employ him again."
"Lucius, I must be the luckiest woman in the world, to have you to teach me about this part of life. If there is more to learn, I think I could bear another lesson." Jane then pulled his head down, and kissed him. "Thank you," she whispered. He made to pull out of her, but she said, timidly, "Please don't. I like it so. Stay with me."
They lay for a while, basking in their mutual delight, till nature took its course and separated them. Lucius then stood up, disappeared from Jane's view for a while, and returned with a bowl of warm water and a clean cloth. He indicated that she should clean herself with them. He knew how much of a surprise it was for some women that the act of love eventually resulted in the man's essence spilling over their inner thighs, or making their bed uncomfortably damp: it was obvious when it actually occurred, but it was so often ignored by the innocent's imagination.
When she felt fresh once more, Jane sat up in bed and watched Lucius as he set the bowl down on the washstand, and returned to her. She admired his long silver hair, catching the candlelight as he crossed the room; his legs with their long thigh bones, and the tiny silver hairs on his lower legs. His shirt now hid his shrunken manhood from view, and also his behind when he turned away from her. She wondered if he would keep his promise, and allow her to see all of him. He made as if to cross to the other side of the bed, but she put out her hand, and touched his arm.
"Lucius, please," she said, "I want to see you. I want to look at you. You said you would."
"Yes, I did," he agreed reluctantly. "So be it." Swiftly, as if he were afraid that if he hesitated, he would falter, Lucius removed his shirt over his head, and cast it aside onto a nearby chair. Then he stood before her, naked. Jane looked at him: so this was a man, unclothed as nature intended. She saw that he had broad shoulders, and a deep chest with a soft downy covering that she longed to stroke; but the hairs on his chest stopped abruptly as the fair skin abutted against taut, red, angry skin that shone unnaturally, matching the scar she had already seen on the right side of his face, disappearing into the hair that grew patchily on that side of his head. Lucius' bodily scarring was uneven in colour, looked sore to the touch, and covered most of the right side of his torso and much of his right arm. Jane's eyes were also drawn to the tattoo on his left arm: the Dark Mark, the proof that Lucius Malfoy had once been a notorious Death Eater. Jane shivered a little at the thought.
Lucius turned around slowly to show her the rear view: the scarring was worse here, and looked even angrier, covering most of his upper back. But Jane was less interested in the scars than in Lucius' buttocks: she thought that he had the most beautiful bottom, and she wanted to stroke and squeeze it.
"Come here, please, Lucius," she said. "Close by me."
He came to stand beside her. She saw the uncertainty on his face, his fear of rejection. She reached out her arms, encircled his pelvis, and indulged herself completely by taking one buttock in each hand, and rubbing her face in the hairs on his chest. "You have a beautiful behind, Lucius," she told him. Then she looked at him seriously. "Lucius, the scars are nothing. You could still have any woman you wanted. Miss Chang would still want you if she saw you this way. Any woman to whom you made love as you made love to me tonight would still want you. Everyone has some imperfection. You have blown up your injury out of all proportion to the reality of the situation. You are still a very attractive man."
Lucius sighed. "Perhaps you are right, Jane. But I told you, I am a vain man. I cannot yet accept myself this way. But I can perhaps learn to see things differently if I try to see through your eyes. I am truly grateful that you see me as you do. You have a beautiful mind, Jane, to think of me in that way."
He walked around the bed, and climbed in beside her. They snuggled together, both enjoying the sensuous feeling of skin upon skin.
"Now," said Lucius, "You have another choice to make. Dessert? Or sleep? Or we can lie here for a while and then make love again? Or we can just see what happens…"