The Eye Of The Gazer
Chapter 14
Jane Currer walked alone in the park at Gildenford Hall. She paid no attention to the splendour of the trees flaunting their autumn hues, grown deeper and more glorious over the preceding weeks. Her feet took her automatically to the lake, and she climbed the steps to the stone pavilion, where she sat, staring unseeing at the swans sailing by.
Jane was trying to organise her thoughts. She now knew that she had fallen in love with Lucius Malfoy. Had she not already felt a strong attraction to him, she would not have agreed to his proposal that he should be the first one to penetrate her womanhood.
She had tested the ground, she had made sure to ask him about Cho Chang. Lucius had told her the whole unvarnished truth, and she had been satisfied that she would not be cast in the role of a mistress displacing a consort. Jane had guessed that in spite of the current situation, Miss Chang and Lucius still loved each other. It was only the stubborn Malfoy pride that had kept them apart for so long; but a healing of the rift had seemed extremely unlikely.
But now circumstances had changed everything: Bryony's illness had been the catalyst they both needed to reignite the embers of their passion. Jane had heard them consummate their mutual longing; she had seen them together afterwards; she had observed their body language, the small glances, the unspoken understanding between them. She knew Lucius had also spent the following night with Cho.
And in response, she had felt a wave of despair. Her chest had hurt so much that she could not breathe; tears pricked behind her eyes, and slid silently down her cheeks; she could not eat, for her throat closed each time she tried to swallow. It had taken a great effort of will to get out of bed, and present an apparently calm face to the world. In one way, she was grateful that Bryony was still in hospital, for she did not think she would have been able to teach as before without the child noticing that something was amiss.
Jane decided that she must forget Lucius Malfoy as anything other than the father of her pupil. He had not attempted to speak to her alone since the poisoning, and Jane told herself that she was glad. As time passed, she hoped it would become easier to keep to her resolution. She had even considered leaving Gildenford Hall, to put a physical distance between herself and Lucius that would match the gulf she now felt separated their feelings. But Jane did not really want to leave. She loved Bryony, and enjoyed teaching her; the Chang family were good employers, and she lived very comfortably here at the Hall. No, she would not go. Lucius did not live here, she had no need to see him other than rarely; perhaps he would avoid her now anyway.
She noticed it had begun to rain softly, the drops making rings of ripples on the surface of the lake. Then Jane heard a noise, and turned to see the figure of a man silhouetted against the greensward. At first her heart stood still, as momentarily she thought it must be Lucius, until she realised that the shape was wrong: this man was both shorter and stockier than Lucius, and, she soon realised, dark haired. Jane began to make out the man's features, and saw that it was Neville, the gardener. He smiled awkwardly at her.
"Hello, Jane," he said, a trifle nervously, "I hope I'm not bothering you. Do you mind if I shelter from the rain in here? It looks like a short shower, I hope it won't last."
Jane smiled back at Neville. "Of course I don't mind. Come in, sit down. What brings you to this part of the park?"
"I'm checking on the water lilies," replied Neville. Jane had noticed before that his shyness disappeared when he discussed plants: Neville was very knowledgeable about every aspect of many different plants, from their origins and care to their medicinal, magical or potion properties. He had told Jane that herbology was the only subject at which he had been any good at Hogwarts.
"The flowers will be over soon," continued Neville, sitting beside Jane. "I need to collect the last water lily harvest of the season. Madam Chang needs her lotus supplies for the winter." He now looked at Jane more carefully. "Tell me to mind my own business," he said hesitantly, "But you look upset. Would it help to talk?"
Jane smiled ruefully at Neville. "You're very kind," she said, "You're also very observant, so I won't lie to you, but it's private. I'm sorry, I don't feel can discuss it with anyone."
Neville nodded his understanding. He continued to talk about his work. If he noticed Jane was only half listening, either he did not mind, or perhaps he realised that his inconsequential chatter was soothing in its own way. Neville was a very comfortable person to be near when he was in his own environment: he was calm and undemanding. He would converse happily with visitors to his garden, but was equally content if they wished just to walk and admire the view, or sit and read undisturbed in a quiet corner. Jane's attention was drawn to Neville by his last remarks.
"Sorry, Neville, did you just say you were going to China?"
"Yes, that's right. Madam Chang suggested it. She's arranged for me to stay with relatives of hers in Kunming. There are so many species and genera of plants that are only found in China. The part of China around Kunming is well known for the special plants used by Chinese wizards for medicine and magic. Madam Chang wants me to bring back some of the Chinese plants, and grow them here at Gildenford Hall. She's given me the name of a wizard plant expert she knows in China. She knows I'm interested in magical and medicinal plants, so she wants to help me expand my knowledge. We could end up with a unique Chinese collection here if we can establish the plants in our garden."
Jane smiled at Neville's quiet but obvious enthusiasm. "When will you go?" she asked him. "I'll miss you," she added, "You're always busy in the garden when I come out for a walk."
"I leave in two days. I'll be away for a fortnight. I'll miss you too."
"No, you won't, you'll be too busy plant hunting!"
Neville smiled. He did not disagree with her, for it was at least partly true: he would be busy in a new and strange environment. It was Jane, remaining at home, who would miss the companion of her afternoons: another employee like herself, unrelated to Bryony, who could appreciate Jane's situation.
Neville seemed to be thinking. He turned to Jane, and said, "How is Bryony? She's still in St Mungo's isn't she? When is she coming home?"
"The Healers think she will need to stay in St Mungo's for another week. Then when she first comes home, she'll still be weak, and will need to rest a lot."
"So she won't be having any lessons for at least two weeks?"
"No, I suppose not."
"Jane," Neville turned and looked at her, "Would you like to come with me to China? I can ask Madam Chang if it would be all right with her family. It would be better than staying here and worrying about Bryony, wouldn't it? She's going to be all right isn't she? So if you won't be needed to teach her, it would be a good time to go away, and take your mind off what happened."
Jane was astonished. She had only just learned that Neville was going away, and now he was asking her to go with him. Her first instinct was to say no, but she paused before she said this: for had she not been seeking a way to avoid Lucius Malfoy? If she were on the other side of the world on a different continent, there would be no danger at all of coming across him by accident. Distance might be just what she needed to reorder her thoughts, and put the blond wizard firmly away into the recesses of her mind. So instead, almost recklessly, she said, "Neville, that's a wonderful idea. Do you really want a companion though? I don't know much about plants, I don't want to get in your way. Also, I think I should be around when Bryony comes home. She won't want lessons, but she will need someone to care for her and entertain her. I can read to her and play with her. Perhaps I could come with you just for the first week?"
The delight in Neville's smile when she said this was another surprise for Jane. Too late, she realised that perhaps his invitation had been more than just an offer from a good friend attempting to stop her dwelling on Bryony's poisoning. Neville was quiet and retiring like Jane herself. This reaching out to her might be his way of beginning a courtship.
But she had already said yes, and she could not retract this now. Jane hoped Neville did not care for her more than a little, for she had no wish to hurt him. This visit to China might after all not be a particularly relaxing time, for she would have to monitor Neville carefully, and pitch her responses accordingly; remaining his friend, but not allowing him to build up hopes of anything more meaningful.
Deep in the abyss, an embryo consciousness stirred. This thing barely existed, it was not capable of rational thought; but it responded instinctively to something it was unable to resist. It probed, seeking. From where had the stimulus come? The thing searched; its only reason for existence was the call it had sensed. It would search, forever if necessary, to find the source.
Upwards. It began to crawl upwards, infinitely slowly: for the thing was at present infinitely minuscule, and the abyss infinitely deep. Its steep sides had few points of purchase. Progress would be gradual and protracted, but single-mindedly determined. Time had no meaning here, in the World Beyond. If it took a second or a century to reach its goal mattered not at all to this tiny spark of understanding; for neither the second nor the century existed here.
Jane paused to catch her breath as she climbed up the steep side of a Chinese mountain. She had not realised how unfit she was. She walked regularly in the park at Gildenford Hall, and ran around in short bursts with Bryony, but the terrain there with its gentle slopes had not prepared her at all for this angular rocky peak rising from the shores of the lake. Jane was exceedingly grateful that Kunming was not as hot as she had feared, for due to its high altitude, in spite of being on the same latitude as North Africa, this City of Perpetual Spring had a gentle climate. Jane felt she could not have born it if she had been walking in the heat she had expected. As it was, she wished she could fly up the mountain on her broomstick, but this place was very popular with Muggles, and China had so many of them. Still, the walk was pleasant if exhausting, for the track led through clumps of bamboo and a beautiful forest of ancient trees, with the occasional glimpse of a squirrel rustling the leaves above, or scurrying across the path in front of her.
Neville was walking ahead of her with their guide, a member of the Kunming Chang family with whom they were lodging. The two of them had stopped often and waited for Jane to catch them up, and eventually she told them not to wait, she would walk at her own pace, and see them at the site just below the mountain summit where the plant they were seeking grew. In spite of the mountain's popularity, they met few people on this path, for most Muggles took a chairlift directly to the mountaintop to see the old Taoist temple there. Therefore, certain rare plants flourished more or less undisturbed on the slopes.
Alone now on the hillside track, Jane breathed in the fresh mountain air, scented with resin from the trees, and listened to the calls of unfamiliar birds. At a break in the trees, she stood awhile to admire the view over Dianchi Lake, and let her mind drift as she recovered her breath.
Jane could hear her own heart beating steadily in the near silence. Suddenly it stood still, as an inexpressible feeling thrilled through her body, as sharp and startling as an electric shock. Her eyes and ears strained expectantly, and her flesh quivered.
For the quiet had been broken by a voice crying, "Jane! Jane! Jane!"
"What is it?" gasped Jane, shocked. She might have said "Where is it?" for the voice did not seem to come from the woods, from the track either before her or behind her, nor from amongst the boulders of the huge rocky outcrop nearby; it did not come from the air or from the earth. She had heard it, the voice of a human, a known and loved voice – that of Lucius Malfoy; and it spoke wildly, eerily, urgently.
"I am coming," cried Jane, "Wait for me!" She flew to the next turn in the path, and saw no-one. She ran back to the last turn, and there was nobody there either. She listened hard, and heard again, "Darling Jane! Sweet Jane!"
"Where are you?" she exclaimed, looking vainly among the rocks, and finding only dark shadows; and an answering echo, "Where are you?" came there faintly back. The wind sighed in the trees, and all was quiet once more.
"Is this the mind's deception, or is it true witchcraft?" Jane asked herself, feeling as if a madness had overtaken her. She had come here to China to avoid Lucius Malfoy, and yet, thinking he had called her, she had immediately obeyed her first instinct: to go to him.
Was this her mind's way of telling her that she would never be free of him, and that truly she did not wish to be?
Jane continued on her way, subdued now and taking little notice of her surroundings. She was unsure how long the madness had lasted, and she hoped Neville would not be concerned.
As she thought of Neville, her heart sank. This trip had been a mistake. She had just proved to herself that the distance of half a world was not enough to drive Lucius from her mind, and in addition she had allowed Neville to hope that he stood a chance with her: for now she was sure of his intentions. He had begun to look at her with such longing that it was impossible that she should be wrong.
Jane sighed to herself. This way of thinking was impossible. Lucius was unattainable now that he and Cho were reconciled. She wondered, should she try to convince herself to consider Neville seriously as a suitor?
The entity from the abyss was growing. As it climbed the near vertical walls in reply to the irresistible summons, it felt the call grow stronger. The thing was little more than a distillation of desire, filled almost exclusively with longing; for what it did not yet know.
Ascending, the entity gradually developed a second emotion: hate. It felt a great hatred and jealousy of all things that were alive, even as it sensed that it was being drawn to the world of the living.
Onwards and upwards, always moving, always growing. Now it possessed something that looked a little like a head; but it was still blind and deaf, and progressed solely by touch and instinct.
The invisible force pulled it in the same way that the daily path of Ra across the heavens forces a sunflower to watch his progress.