Chapter 5

Out on the doorstep of Elphaba and Fiyero's small house, Glinda waited, nervously clutching the Grimmerie so tightly her knuckles were drained of all color. The driver watched her curiously, wondering why she was just as anxious now that she had arrived as she'd been throughout the trip. He shrugged, and seemed resigned to the fact that he would never understand her, or women in general.

Glinda began to despair that anyone was going to answer the door, but as she raised her fist to knock for a third time, the door swung wide, and upon seeing her, Fiyero sighed with relief. "She said you were coming," he whispered, any explanation of who Fiyero meant by 'she' being completely unnecessary. "Come in," he continued, stepping aside. "We've been waiting for you."

As they entered the house, Fiyero glanced around as if realizing for the first time how small and shabby his house must look. He cast his eyes downward as he spoke. "It's not much of a place, but we had to take what we could find. We can't fix it up, because..." He knew he sounded ridiculous, worrying that his home was too small, too run down, or too anything at a time like this. Glinda, for her part, seemed to understand why he would be so concerned. He did not know how she had changed in these last six months, he could not know that appearances were no longer what mattered most to her.

"Fiyero, I understand," she said sincerely. "You don't have to apologize. I came because I know that... that monster did something to Elphaba. I had to try to make things right." She took a few steps further inside, and could now hear the feeble, painful gasping sounds coming from the bedroom. Glinda's eyes grew wide with fear, and she clutched the Grimmerie even more tightly.

"Is that Elphaba??" Glinda knew it was a stupid question. Who else would be living here with Fiyero? Glinda's face instantly went as pale as the knuckles on her hands, and she backed away toward the front door. "I can't go in there!" she cried. "I've been trying to learn, but I'm not smart enough to really understand this crazy book! I won't put her through anything worse. If I were to accidentally cast the wrong spell..."

Fiyero was usually slow to anger, but in this instance his patience flew away like a bird fleeing a coming storm. "Elphaba is dying in there, Glinda! Are you going to stop panicking like a child, or do I have to take that book in there and try to decipher it myself? There is no time for your dramatics!"

There were many things Glinda had imagined would happen when she arrived here, but being on the receiving end of such fury from Fiyero had not been one of them. She simply could not help herself, and she burst into tears. Normally, this would have made Fiyero pause and soften his tone of voice. But today, he wasn't feeling so gentle... Elphaba was running out of time.

"I don't want her to see you cry!" He growled, which only made Glinda cry harder. As she forced her weeping to come under control, Glinda thought she heard her name being called, but at first thought she had imagined it.

"Glinda," Elphaba repeated, louder this time. "It's all right... all right if you're scared. Come in here... where I can see you."

Glinda wiped the last of her tears from her face, then held her head high and walked toward the bedroom. She stopped in the doorway, and waited for Elphaba to turn her head in that direction. When their eyes met, Glinda wanted to look away. Elphaba's eyes were filled with pain unlike any Glinda had ever seen before. Some of that agony was driven out her eyes as Elphaba managed to smile. "I'm glad you came, it's so... So good to see you. Come in..." Elphaba wanted to say more, but had no strength left at the moment. Fiyero followed Glinda into the room, settling onto the bed directly beside Elphaba. Her eyes had slipped shut, and Fiyero shook her gently by the shoulders, knowing he was rousing her with pain more than the motion, and he was sorry.

"Come on, Ivy," he began, using the nickname without consideration for Glinda's likely confusion. "You have to stay awake. Just a few more minutes, all right?"

Elphaba did indeed open her eyes, but immediately grimaced in pain. "It burns," she gasped. "Fiyero, my skin is burning!" Fiyero set about doing what he could to ease Elphaba's pain, while Glinda looked more and more rapidly through the Grimmerie, praying she would come upon just the spell that was needed. As she turned the pages, Glinda realized she understood far more of the book than she thought. Still, she could not find the spell she needed, and began to talk to herself, as was her habit when she was frustrated.

"Glinda, I know... I know you can find it. I trust you to do it. But you... you have to trust yourself, too. I can tell you can actually read the pages now... You're going to find the answer..."

Elphaba had to stop speaking. She was gasping for breath and seemed barely conscious. Fiyero held her close and tried to soothe her. "Just try to rest, okay? Don't close your eyes, but take a rest. You'll exhaust yourself if you do a lot of talking."

"Everything is exhausting, Fiyero. Besides, someone had... had to encourage Glinda. You... you sure didn't. I asked you to be... be gentle."

"I know you did, I'm sorry," he whispered. "Being so worried made me short-tempered. We can all talk when you're feeling better. How does your skin feel right now?"

"All right," Elphaba whispered weakly. "I'm so tired of feeling like... like I'm being ripped apart. I want to... to go to sleep now. Please." Elphaba's breathing suddenly became startlingly ragged, causing Fiyero to call her name loudly. Glinda looked up from the Grimmerie for a brief instant, realized what must be happening, and turned determinedly back to the book. After rapidly turning several more pages, she looked up again.

"Fiyero, I think I found it!"

"You think, or you're sure? There won't be time for second chances, Glinda."

"Don't you think I know that?" She sounded highly agitated, and gave up trying to talk to Fiyero. She glanced over the page once more, then began to read aloud. As the words of the spell floated on the air, Fiyero fixed his eyes on Elphaba's face, to watch for signs of relief of her agony. Almost instantly, her breathing grew more regular. After a moment or two more, the pained expression left Elphaba's face. Only then could Glinda believe that she had found the correct spell... She had really done it. She sank into the only chair there in the room.

Elphaba sat there, still propped up on the heap of pillows, saying nothing. Fiyero watched her, wondering if something else was wrong.

"You don't have to be so worried," she told him gently. "I'm just enjoying being able to breathe without being in agony. I'm starving! What have we got to eat out there?"

"Just about anything you could want. Yesterday Cole brought us so much stuff, you'd think there were five or six people living here. Anything special you wanted?"

Elphaba shook her head, then moved to rise from the bed. Fiyero urged her to stay where she was, that he would bring a feast in to both her and Glinda. Elphaba smiled, and returned to her restful position. After Fiyero had gone, Elphaba spoke to Glinda, feeling strangely awkward. She hadn't expected to feel like this. Even though the two of them hadn't seen each other in six months, Elphaha had thought their reunion would feel like a homecoming. Instead, it felt like she was sharing the room with someone she barely knew.

"It's so dim in here... Fiyero had to close the drapes because the light hurt my eyes. Would you mind opening them now? I don't think I can get up yet. It still hurts to move." Elphaba realized her voice sounded stiff, nearly formal. Glinda complied to her request without speaking, as if the awkwardness were contagious and had spread to her. Once Glinda had let the daylight back into the small room and returned to her chair, Elphaba felt ready to begin a conversation.

"Fiyero's friend told us just a while ago that you're engaged. What is he like?"

Glinda broke into a wide grin, and began to talk so fast Elphaba could hardly keep up with the flood of words. She smiled to see her friend so excited, and began to feel more comfortable.

"I hope one day there is some way you can meet him! He owns his own tea shop in my home province. After you both... Well, right after you left, I took care of the most immediate things pressing on my attention, then I went home. Mother and Father were very surprised to see me. Mother goes regularly to Travion's little shop, and right away she started trying to play matchmaker. I should have resented it, I suppose, but I was very lonely, and it was nice to get my mind off my troubles for a while. So I went and met him. He was so charming, but he didn't go out of his way to flatter me just because Mother was one of his customers. He invited me into the store and brewed one of his most exotic teas for me. At first we only made polite converstaion, but he was so friendly and warm that I found as soon as I left I wanted to see him again. He called on me once at the estate, but then I had to go back to the city. It was only about two weeks later that he came to see me there.

"I found it so easy to talk to him... To confide in him. It wasn't long before I told him about you and Fiyero. Or at least what I thought had happened to you. He was so understanding, and he actually asked me what our friendship had been like. He was genuinely interested, he really listened to the things I said. That was the night I knew I was falling in love with him. After that, he stayed in the city for an entire month. I don't know how he managed the business from that far away. He waited a few more months to propose, but I think he wanted to for weeks before he actually did it. He was so nervous... I thought it was so cute!"

"It might be a good thing he's not here... he might resent being called cute." Elphaba was only half-joking, but Glinda laughed out loud. "I wish I could meet him too. He sounds very kind, and he's good for you. It's a relief to know you're so in love with him. At first Fiyero and I thought..."

"That I was rushing into something." Glinda finished for her. Elphaba nodded, but then looked away, ashamed of herself. "You don't have to feel guilty. Many people thought the same thing. But I'm very happy, believe me."

"I do," Elphaba whispered. Her eyes were still fixed on the window. After a moment, she seemed lost in thought. Glinda sat silently, waiting for her friend to say something more. When she didn't, Glinda grew more somber, and asked if there was something wrong.

"It might be better if you asked me what was right. The answer wouldn't take as long." Elphaba sighed, but did not continue until Glinda urged her to. "It's just... I AM happy being with Fiyero. I know he loves me, and I love him. But everything else is wrong. We're so isolated out here. It doesn't usually bother me, but Fiyero gets very lonesome. I hardly know that childhood friend of his that looks out for us. Every time he visits, I hide in here. He's never hurt me, or been mean to me, but I can't seem to be friendly. He thinks I don't like him. And then there's Fiyero... looking the way he does. Every day I look into his face, and I'm reminded that I did that to him. Fiyero doesn't hate me for it... He understands. But I hate MYSELF for it, and I can't bear to see him spend the rest of his life that way."