The hole in the ground idea is from Pokemon again, and this day at Waikuku when we dug holes in the sand and covered them up with sand and sticks, haha, it really worked. I have a bit of a hole in the ground covered with twigs obsession don't I? Wonder what Freud would make of that…
The next day Tommy-tim-tom-tibon awoke to the sounds of Terry Weasley crying. It was because Prof. McGonagal had stolen his liver sometime during the night and now he had a dent where it used to be. Escargot told him to harden up.
On the way down to breakfast they ran into Kinkerus Blinkerus who had missed out on being sorted and therefore couldn't join the school until next year. In the mean time he was being taken on as a house-elf apprentice.
"Oops, Kinkerus I just knocked over these 12 bottles of Pumpkin juice! Be a dear and clean it up will you?" Escargot said, purposefully smashing a dozen bottles of juice on the floor. Terry Weasley gave her a reproachful look and so she hit him with her shoe. Hard.
After breakfast the Hufflepuff's first subject was charms. They had it with the Gryffindors. All of the Gryffindors happened to be Chinese tourists who didn't speak English, expect for two.
"Now swish and flick children, swish and flick!" midget Prof. Flitwick told them. They were all failing miserably except Brilliania Granger, Hermione Granger's secret daughter. She had had her out of wedlock to Victor Krum during her fourth year at school and had been forced to keep her under her bed, as pets aren't allowed at Hogwarts except owls, frogs, rats and cats. Brilliania actually had a twin brother but he was eaten by Crookshanks shortly after his birth.
"Oh I hate that Brilliania Granger" said Stupidia Nameia venomously.
"I know! She thinks she's so great just because she's Hermione Granger's daughter." Escargot agreed
"Let's kill her!" suggested Lolita the feral swat bung eyed girl. Everyone turned to look at her in surprise.
"What?" she asked "I was just kidding!"
"I didn't realise it could talk" said Escargot
Their next lesson was potions with Prof. Crookshanks. He had taken over the position of teaching potions from Horace Slughorn.
"Meow meow meow meoooooow purrrrrr" said Prof. Crookshanks. He walked on his hind legs and wore wizard robes. He also had a wand, though nobody knew how on earth he came by it.
They quickly got to work making a simple sleep draught. Escargot and Stupidia (who were working together) put some of theirs in a saucer and feed it to Prof. Crookshanks who dozed off to sleep immediately. They spent the rest of the lesson chatting about ways to revenge themselves upon Brilliania Granger.
"I think we should lure her into Moaning Myrtles toilet and then lock her and she'll have to spend the whole day talking to Myrtle!" Stupidia volunteered
"Or we could slip Swearing Solution into her Pumpkin Juice!" said Terry Weasley sounding as mischievous as someone who just said something really naughty, but in actual fact what they just said was super lame.
"What good would that do Terry?" Tom asked
"Then everybody would think she was a potty-mouth"
Tom stared at Terry
"So?"
"Well nobody likes a potty mouth!" said Terry indignantly
"Oh shut up Weasley. What if we lured Brilliania into the Forbidden Forest? Then she'd surely be lost for the rest of the term at least. What do you think?" Tom asked her friends
"Sound's good to me, how shall we go about it?" Escargot asked
"Well..." Tom said and speaking in no more then a whisper she told them of her plan.
"Awesome! We'll put it into action after dinner" Stupidia said as the bell rang and they all went off to their next class.
Dinnertime took what seemed like an age to arrive. The Hufflepuffs all bolted down their shepard's pie and treacle tart then they ran off to their various posts. Jerome, the black American basketball player had a crucial role. He was to pretend to be playing basketball near the Forest while Escargot ran off and got Brilliania Granger. The obvious flaw in the plan was that he would have to be playing on grass with no hoop, but this did not deter anyone.
"Brilliania! Oh Brilliania! Come quickly somebody needs your help! Out by the Forbidden Forest" Escargot called to Brilliania who was still in the Great Hall doing extra Charms homework. Escargot was hidden under Terry Weasley's invisibility cloak and to Brilliania she was just a mysterious voice
"Ok alright then" Brilliania agreed, following the mysterious voice, (who was singing 'Hoggy Warty Hogwarts' to the tune of 'Welcome to the Black Parade') all the way to the Forest.
"Thank Merlin's jumpsuit you're here!" Jerome said sincerely when Brilliania arrived on the scene "I was happily playing basketball here by the Forest and a Centaur came out of the Forest and stole my ball! It was signed by Nicole Ritchie! Could you possibly get it back for me, seeing how talented at magic you clearly are?" Jerome batted his eye lashes, which was more bizarre then alluring.
"Sure I'll help you? He went in here you say?" foolish Brilliania said falling for the ploy by wandering into the Forest.
She was not 10 yardsticks in when she spotted a Centaur holding a basketball. This in reality was just Stupidia Nameia Malfoy balancing on Terry Weasley's shoulders. He was wearing one half of a horse costume.
"Hey bully, you give that back! Or pick on someone your own magical equivalent!" Brilliania said drawing her wand
"Ok, please don't hurt me!" Stupidia called out, dropping the basketball just to the left of where she had been standing on a suspicious looking pile of twigs and dirt. They disappeared into the undergrowth. Brilliania smiled to herself and walked over to pick up the basketball, when there was a loud crack and the twigs and dirt gave out beneath her. Brilliania was in a deep whole that the twigs and leaves had been covering. It had been dug by Tom earlier that day, the clever nymph.
"Ahh help!" she called. The Hufflepuff's all emerged from their various hiding places to look down upon their fallen foe.
"Please help me out!" Brilliania called from her hole pathetically.
"No" Tom called back "We're going to keep you there and you can make your own way home. This is for your own good really; just to teach you not to be such a show off. Goodnight!" and they all wondered off back to the castle.
"That went well!" said Stupidia "Considering all the things that could have gone wrong"
"I used to read lots of detective stories back on the Leek Farm. There wasn't much else to do really. So I know lots of murder plots!" Tom said happily
"And when she tells the teachers what happened all we do it deny it! All of us against one of her" Terry said smugly. The Hufflepuffs (minus Lolita and Gerald) walked back towards Hogwarts Castle, the sun low slung in the sky, casting red and yellow beams of light across the Lake. Tom looked around at her comrades and couldn't help feeling something she'd never felt before, it was warm and fuzzy and felt a lot like friendship. Ohhhh so lame!
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