Still I Look to Find A Reason to Believe
Chapter Nine
He didn't answer again. Hermione nodded. "Well, I'm going to tell you anyway and please don't interrupt me." Hermione walked over to the bath tub and sat on the ledge. "Ok, so anyway. I want you to know I didn't mean to wind up here with you. And you can't blame me for what happened it was your fault!" She took a pause, waiting for him to say something, but nothing came. Hermione then realized he still didn't know what she was talking about.
"A few years ago you attended a school for witchcraft and wizardy, Hogwarts. You used to hate the three Gryffindors known as the golden trio, until closer to the end of your seven years at Hogwarts. You fell in love with Hermione Granger. You both were deeply in love with one another, but when the battle came, you decided being a Death Eater was more important than her. You left, without looking back.
"You shouldn't have left, though, because later on that month she found out she was pregnant, with your child. She never was given the opportunity to tell you and she wound up raising the baby all by herself. She didn't have much money, only what she had from when you left. But everything was fine. She had the baby, and they were both as happy as she could make them. But not for long. When her daughter was about three they were captured by Death Eaters and brought to the slave shelter, here.
"Hermione didn't give her real name, but when you bought Jane, you really bought Hermione, me. I changed my name Draco. Its me, Hermione, and Dakota, she is yours." Hermione took a breath, and looked at him. He was still staring but now his eyes were soft. She couldn't think of anything else to do but try and make him see why she waited do long.
"I wanted you to know this whole time I just feared that maybe you wouldn't accept Dakota and I. But when I found out I was pregnant, I knew it was my chance that I had been waiting for, the chance to tell you." She took another pause. She knew it was a lot to take in, but she needed him to say something. He couldn't seem to take it in. He walked out of the bath room into his room. Hermione followed to see him sitting on a arm chair. You couldn't hear him, but Hermione knew better. He was crying. His eyes were closed like they usually were when he was feeling anything. Hermione sighed. It wasn't just hard for him. It was also hard for her because she was the one holding it in all this time.
"Draco?" Hermione said, hoping for some reply. He looked up at her, and smiled. "You look so different from what I remember." He told her, and Hermione looked down. "No," he said, "that isn't a bad thing, not bad, just different."
Hermione continued to look at him. Had he even wondered where she was for the past four years? "The Dark Lord told me he had killed you. He found out about our relationship after I had left. I didn't realize he may have lied. I just learned to deal with the fact and move on. I thought it was better off though. I mean, not you being dead, but knowing that someway I would never have to worry about facing you again. It pained me to leave, Hermione, very much. But I had to, to protect you and your parents. If I didn't, the Dark Lord would have found out about us, killed you, me and your family, and you may not have ever got the chance to have Dakota." He told her, hoping it would be enough. But it wasn't. Hermione shook her head.
"Do you really think that a minute of explaining will make up for my four years of loneliness, longing for you to come back to me? You know I had to tell Dakota that her father died. You want to know why? Because it was easier for me, to think that you were really dead. That you died a good man, who never meant to leave his family. It was a lie. Not just for Dakota, but for me. I needed some release from the pain I was feeling. The pain you caused." She told him, tears running freely down her face.
"You have no idea how much it hurt when you left, or when I was alone and pregnant with no one with me. You have no idea." Hermione said wiping the tears. Draco, who was crying too, stood up and walked over to her. He wrapped his arms around her and held her like he did before, for what seemed like so long ago.
Hermione sniffled as she asked, "What happens now? Where do we go from here?"
Draco shook his head.
"I don't know. But whatever happens, I am not leaving like I did before. I can't let that happen again. I know its a lot, Hermione," he said kissing her cheek, "but I want you to know that even though I have become as hard as I am, I have never once stopped loving or thinking about you. That night I left… It haunts me when I sleep. But maybe now, that I have you, I won't have those night mares any more."
A/N: I am soooooooo sorry if this isn't the way you wanted it to be. You see, I had in my head an idea of how I wanted this scene to be, you know, but when I got to writing it, as I was writing it, I hated it, and If I do you probably do to. I was hoping maybe some of you could like review and tell me what I should change, because I am willing to re-write this chapter… Like I said even I'm not happy with the way it turned out… Anyway, ttyl.