SO YOU HAD A BAD DAY...part 3
Chase knew he was tired. The desire to try and sleep standing up was a testimony to this fact, but an even bigger clue was that he was drinking cold, black, coffee. Gulping it down would be a better description of what he was doing. Gulping without even wincing as the rancid taste of it hit his tongue.
When the styrofoam cup was empty, Chase crushed it in his fist and tossed it in the waste can, then he leaned heavily against the counter with his eyes closed, waiting for the caffeine rush to hit him. He could feel it buzzing sluggishly through his veins, seemingly as lethargic as he was.
Peeling his eyes open, Chase pushed off the counter and headed for the door. He needed to check on the tests he was running before he could even think about heading home. But even as he reached the table, House came limping into the room. Chase felt the other man's blue gaze settle on him and it felt almost like an electical jolt. He looked away, feeling somehow like he had just been caught doing something wrong.
"Go home!" House snapped at him.
"I have tests I'm running!" Chase protested, even though he rather felt it was stupid of him to argue the point. It wasn't often House was willing to let one of them go home before their job was done.
House moved to stand directly in front of Chase, not saying a word until Chase lifted his head to meet the blue gaze. "Cameron took over your tests. Go home. Try not to have an accident on the way and when you get there, take this." As he spoke, House pulled a plain brown pill bottle out of his jacket pocket and held it out.
Chase stared at it suspiciously. "What is it?"
"Something to make you sleep." House sounded a bit angry as he replied. "It works fast so be ready to crawl into bed the moment you take it and I don't expect to see you back here till noon."
"Are you kidding me?" Glancing at his watch, Chase quickly did the math. It was after ten pm. If he left now, went home and took a shower, ate something then took the pill and didn't show up till noon, that would mean the pill would knock him out for about twelve hours. Which meant House was offering him some potent shit.
House rolled his eyes. "Would I do that?" he taunted in a mock whine. "Just take the damn pill. If you show up before noon...you're fired." With that he tossed the bottle at Chase's feet then turned and walked out the door.
Eyes on the rolling bottle, Chase waited until he was sure House was gone before stooping to scoop it up. He yanked off the cap, after struggling with the damn thing for a minute, then he shook the pill out into the palm of one hand. It was small and pale pink without any markings. Chase didn't recognize it.
Tipping it back in the bottle, he put the top on then shoved it in his jeans pocket shifting against the uncomfortable bulge. He knew House was serious about firing him, so he shrugged off his lab coat, tossed it over the back of the nearest chair then grabbed his jacket and his messenger bag. He'd collected them earlier, when he'd thought he'd be going home around dinner time. Before their patient had coded and House had ordered them to run more tests. Foreman had snuck out around seven after asking Chase to cover for him so he could meet his girl friend for a late supper. Cameron had slipped off somewhere after that and Chase had figured she'd gone for the day too, but apparently not. Or maybe House had called her back. Chase wouldn't put that past him.
He decided he didn't care either way. He was going to go home and, hopefully, get some sleep.
The drive home was done on auto pilot and Chase was relieved to park in the garage and realize he apparently hadn't run any stop signs or lights or anything. Then he was inside and dropping his bag by the door. He knew he should eat something but he had downed a couple of candy bars at the hospital in the hopes of a sugar rush. All he'd really gained from doing that though was an irritating headache that throbbed behind his eyes.
Heading straight for the bathroom, Chase dug out the pill bottle and set it on the counter. Then he turned on the shower, stripped off his clothes and stepped into the cubicle. The hot spray felt heavenly, washing away at least a modicum of tension and weariness. He scrubbed his hair, washed up and rinsed, then he dried off, ran a comb through his hair, brushed his teeth then pulled on boxers and a t-shirt.
He felt tired enough to attempt to sleep without taking the pill, but at the same time he knew his brain wouldn't shut off without help. Trudging back into the bathroom, he kicked aside the wet towels, which he would ignore until morning, and reached for the bottle. He uncapped it, shook the pill directly into his mouth and swallowed it. It stuck a bit in the back of his throat so he grabbed the bottled water he always kept on the counter and chugged a few gulps.
Capping the water, Chase turned off the bathroom lights then headed into the other room and crawled into bed. Even as he settled himself under the covers he could feel a liquid warmth seeping through his veins leaving him feeling drowsy and heavy and he happily let his eyes drift closed.
A heartbeat later he was asleep.
OoO
Because Chase knew House would be anal enough to fire him if he showed up before noon to work, he showed up at noon on the dot. To find that Cameron was the only person in Diagnostics. "Where's everyone?" Chase asked, as he slung his jacket over the back of a chair and shrugged on his lab coat.
"House went to lunch and Foreman is running a scan," Cameron replied, looking up from the book she was reading to study him. "Where were you?"
"Had some stuff to do," Chase replied, off handedly. Then he forced a smile. "House didn't say anything?" He had wondered all the way over if House had told the others the truth about why he was late or whether he had bothered to say anything at all. Or, maybe even worse, he'd made up some fantastic lie that was guaranteed to make Chase miserable and humiliated.
Cameron shook her head. "He just said you were going to be late when I asked."
No surprise to Chase that Cameron had been the one to ask. Chase just nodded at her and moved to pour himself some coffee. He had slept better last night than he had in weeks, but he still felt tired. One of the side effects of sleeping pills was that they could leave you feeling lethargic. Which had always been the case the few times Chase had used them in the past. Whatever House had given him had been very potent, so he felt incredibly sluggish, even after a long shower this morning.
"You okay?"
Chase jumped at the question, not having heard Cameron get up and move to stand beside him. He was glad he had already finished pouring his cup before she'd spoke up. "I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?"
There was a moment of silence before Cameron replied. A moment during which she gave him an intensive once over. "You look tired," she stated.
"It's been a busy week." Chase figured that was an honest enough answer for her. He just hoped it got him off the hook. Cameron could be more tenacious than a dog with a bone when something - or someone - grabbed her attention. For whatever reason. But it wasn't his answer that got him off the hook. It was his pager. Chase frowned at the message. A page from Cuddy was never a good sign. "Gotta go," Chase said, abandoning his coffee. Feeling a bit anxious, he headed out the door.
All the way to Cuddy's office, Chase ran possible scenarios through his head as to why she had paged him. He doubted it was patient related as any page regarding a patient would come from House or the ICU direct. Racking his brain, Chase couldn't think of any reason why Cuddy would page him. He hadn't done anything wrong. He just had a Pavlovnian reaction to a page from Cuddy. He instantly felt guilty.
When he reached her office he noticed she wasn't alone. Chase thought maybe that would offer him a respite and he was about to turn away when Cuddy noticed him and waved him in. Grimacing, Chase pushed open the door and entered the room. That was when Cuddy's guest rose to her feet and Chase froze to the spot as he stared at her.
"Hello, Robert." The woman who spoke was in her late fifties with soft brown hair and hazel eyes. She was dressed in a business suit, her make up was perfectly applied and her face was attractive but worn.
It took a moment for Chase to form a reply and push it out. "Olivia. What are you doing here?" Rude, but he couldn't help it. She was the last person in the world he would have ever expected to see here. His father was dead so it made no sense that his widow would show up at PPTH. The last time Chase had seen his step mother was just before he had moved to the states. She had come over to his place to try and convince him not to leave.
Olivia Chase didn't seem upset by his rudeness, or the question. "We need to talk, Robert," she stated calmly. "And since you wouldn't call me back, I decided to visit you in person."
"Why?" Chase still didn't understand why she was here. He did, however, feel a twinge of guilt at her mention of phone calls. He had gotten her messages, starting two days after his father had died, but he'd deleted them all without listening. It had taken two weeks before she had stopped calling.
"May we talk privately?" Olivia directed the question to Cuddy.
The head of PPTH nodded and stepped out from around her desk. "Feel free to use my office." She smiled at Chase as she passed by him, then she was gone.
Chase had a bad feeling about what was to come and he was tempted to leave in Cuddy's wake.
Apparently Olivia sensed his desire to escape, because she moved to stand between him and the door. "You look good, Robert," she said softly, her eyes appraising him. "But then you always were a beautiful boy. I still remember how shocked I was the first time I saw you. You could use a hair cut though."
"Why are you here?" Chase countered bluntly. He didn't feel like reminiscing with her. Even though her words brought up the memory of the first time they had met. At Chase's mother's funeral. Olivia had been nothing but polite to Chase, even though he had done nothing in return but glare at her and otherwise, pointedly, ignore her existance. At the end of the very long day he had apologized to her for his rudeness, before leaving without looking back. Without stopping when his father tried to call him back. Chase didn't want to remember that day.
"I know my being here isn't exactly pleasant for you, Robert," Olivia spoke up. "I didn't come here to upset you."
Chase heard the sincerity in her words and nodded sharply, but he knew that her reason for being here was going to upset him anyway. "I'm guessing whatever brought you here has to do with my father." It was a statement, not a question.
Olivia regarded Chase a moment, then she moved to sit on the couch. "Come sit with me," she beseeched him. "I want you to listen for just a moment."
"I can't think of anything we'd have to talk about," Chase shot back, not moving. "And anything regarding my father, I'm not interested in."
"Sit down!" The tone was sharp and firm like a school teacher might use on a misbehaving student. Before forming her own Interior design company, Olivia had taught primary school in England. She eyed Chase now, expecting to be obeyed.
He hated himself for giving in, but soon he was sitting in the chair across from her.
Olivia nodded approvingly, then began. "I want you to accept the money that your father left you in his will." She raised a hand to cut Chase off before he could reply. "Just listen first, then you can argue with me." When he nodded, she continued. "You're his only child, Robert. I was never interested in having children and --"
"...neither was my father!" Chase interjected. He couldn't help himself. Then he was on his feet and willing himself to walk out the door. But a hand touched his arm and he turned to see Olivia by his side.
"He wasn't Father of the year by any means," she conceded. "But he loved you in his own way."
Chase shook his head. "I don't believe that and I don't want his money! You keep it!"
Olivia gripped his coat sleeve when he attempted to leave. She tugged him back around to face her. "I don't need the money and you've earned it. And to that end I've set you up with an account here. I have the paper work and all you need to do is sign it. The money will be there for you when you need it."
"I don't need it!" Chase tugged away from her grip and paced over to the door. "You shouldn't have come here, Olivia. And you can give the money to whomever you like. I don't want it!" Just thinking about it made him feel things he didn't want to feel. Made him angry with his father all over again. Chase was tired of being angry.
"The money belongs to you, Robert." Olivia moved to his side and her voice was gentle and warm as she continued. "Sign the papers then do what you want with it. But the money is yours."
There was nothing to say to her. Chase knew she wouldn't change her mind. He had learned that much about her through the years, without even wanting too. Stepping away from her, he reached for the door and pushed his way through. He wanted to leave, to just go somewhere that wasn't here, but he had work to do. So Chase headed back to the office to find it empty. He paged Foreman then headed off to the lab to meet up with him. He needed to focus on something, anything, so he wouldn't have to feel anymore.
OoO
House had been hovering outside of Cuddy's office. He had returned from lunch and was surprised not to see Chase. So he'd asked Cameron where to find him and she told him about Chase being paged to Cuddy's office. He wished he could have eavesdropped on the conversation, but he hadn't wanted to get caught out. But given Chase's emotional state when he'd left, something bad had happened.
Limping into the office, House grinned at the woman standing there. She looked surprised to see him, but recovered quickly. "I'm House and you are?"
"Olivia Chase." She smiled back grimly. "You're Robert's boss."
"And I'm guessing you're his step mom." House made it a statement and he didn't need her nod to know it was a fact. "So what brings you all the way out here? Someone else in the family die?"
Olivia arched an eyebrow at him, then gave him an assessing look. "I need a favor from you, Dr. House."
That surprised House enough to want to at least know what the favor was. But first he had another question. "Why me?"
"Because Rowan spoke of you and Robert when he returned from his visit," Olivia replied. "And even though he didn't like you much, I could tell from what he said that Robert admires you."
"Worships me is more like it," House shot back, watching for her reaction. She was good. She did little more than arch another brow at him. "I inspire that kind of thing in all my minions," he continued. "So what's the favor?"
Olivia took a moment to explain about Rowan's will and the fact that Chase wanted nothing to do with the money.
House was intrigued. "So you and Rowan never had any children together?"
"Neither of us had the time or the interest in children," Olivia replied. "We were both devoted to our careers."
"Yeah, I got that from when he visisted." House moved to lean against the edge of Cuddy's desk. "Are you really all that surprised that Chase doesn't want the money? I mean, I know I'm surprised. Cause he really must be an idiot if he's giving up millions. But still, I can understand his lame way of thinking he doesn't want anything from the daddy that didn't love him."
Moving to stand before House, Olivia locked eyes with him, and determination glinted in her own. "I would be the first to admit that Rowan was a lousy father. He had no interest in babies and then Robert's mother had become...needy. All she had was Robert and she focused all of her attention on him when Rowan was too busy to pay attention to her. Then Robert showed no interest in medicine so Rowan washed his hands of him."
House had to interject at this point. "But Robert became a doctor." He didn't add that he was a damn good one. He didn't tell Chase that and he sure as hell wasn't going to say anything to the wicked step mom.
"After giving up on the church," Olivia allowed.
"He was going to become a priest?" House didn't bother to hide his surprise. He had always figured Chase had studied under nuns because he'd gone to a catholic school. Not that he'd gone to seminary school.
Olivia shrugged. "Apparently he felt the calling when he was younger. As for why he changed his mind, I have no clue. Nor did Rowan ever figure it out. But Chase called and asked if his father's offer to put him through med school was still good and Rowan said yes and I'm sure you can figure out the rest."
That wouldn't be hard at all. House scratched under his chin as he replied, "Little Robbie didnt' want to follow in daddy's footsteps so Daddy lost interest in him. Again."
"Pretty much." Olivia looked sad, then she shook herself and said, "I want you to convince Robert to take the money. He's earned it."
"I'll bet." House was all the more intrigued by his little Aussie underling. Enough so that he was tempted to agree to what Olivia was asking. But there was a sticking point. "Are you the one who called to tell him his father died?"
Olivia nodded. "Yes." She waited, sensing that House wasn't finished.
He wasn't. "Why didn't you call him sooner? Or write a letter? Why didn't you tell him his father was dying?"
"Why didn't you?" Olivia shot back, sounding angry.
"It wasn't my place to tell him," House countered. Then he waited for Olivia Chase's rebuttal.
It was slow in coming. She moved to sit in the chair closest to House, her head bowed. "I would have told him, only I didn't know Rowan hadn't told him until just before he died. He told me he was sorry about what he'd done to Robert and he asked me to tell his son he was sorry. If I had known...I would have told Robert."
House believed her. "Did you tell him what Rowan said?"
"I sent a letter explaining as best I could." Olivia stood up and straightened her jacket. "I have my doubts that Robert read it."
"I bet he read it then shredded it," House replied.
Olivia retrieved an official looking envelope from her purse. She held it out to House. "The money is in this account. The paper work is all there. All Robert has to do is sign it and send it in. Please convince him to do so."
House accpeted the envelope, tucking it in his inside jacket pocket. "I'll see what I can do," he drawled. He watched Olivia Chase reach for her coat and shrug it on. "Leaving so soon?"
"No reason to stay," she replied. Moving to the door she turned back to say, "It was interesting meeting you, Dr. House."
"I'm sure it was," he replied. Then he watched her leave. A moment later he was heading out himself. In search of Chase.
OoO
It was the end of the day and all Chase wanted to do was go home. He had kept himself busy throughout so he wouldn't have to think about Olivia, which meant thinking about his father. Between their patient coding twice before House figured out what was wrong so they could fix things, and spending the hours after that spread between the ICU and the clinic, Chase was able to keep his mind fairly well occupied.
But now he was tired and a tired mind was harder to keep control of. Chase wished he had the nerve to ask House for another pill. He knew sleep would not come easy tonight, yet he knew he needed it. His body was so tired he nearly ached with it, and he felt soul tired as well. Olivia's visit had conjured up too many unwanted memories. Her presence had stirred up an emotional vortex and battling against it was exhausting.
Since Cameron and Foreman were long gone, Chase took his time gathering his things. He figured House was long gone too, so he was surprised when his boss came limping into the room. He was even more surprised when a letter-sized, cream colored envelope, landed on the table between them. "What's this?" Chase asked.
"Something your step mom asked me to give you," House replied. His blue eyes were bright as he leaned against the table and studied Chase. "She went back home, in case you were wondering."
"I wasn't!" Chase snapped. The headache that had been irritating him just stepped up into full blown pain, throbbing in his temples. House had a way of doing that to a person. Inflicting all kinds of pain. But what was even worse is that now Chase would wonder just what he and Olivia had talked about. The only person they had in common was himself. Chase didn't want to go there.
So, of course, House did. "So daddy left you everything. I knew he was rich but...wow! He's really really rich."
Making it a point to ignore House, Chase shrugged off his lab coat and reached for his jacket. Although he wasn't surprised when House just continued on in spite of his silence.
"Take the money, Chase."
"Why?" Chase was surprised at himself for asking that. He had intended to tell House to mind his own business. Apparently his subconscious had prevented him from making such a ridiculous statement. More than anything, House loved to input himself where he didn't belong. And too often that meant nosing his way into Chase's personal life.
House shrugged. "Because it's money." His tone implied Duh very clearly.
But Chase wasn't about to back down on this one. "It's money that I don't want," he stated clearly. He moved around the table to grab his messenger bag, but found his way blocked by House's cane. He lifted his head to glare at his boss.
"Spite your father by taking the money," House countered, looking smug. "Because I'm betting he figured you wouldn't take it. So prove him wrong. Take it and spend it frivolously. That'll have him rolling in his grave."
"If I take the damn thing will you leave me alone?" Chase snapped, reaching for the envelope. He would go home and shred the damn thing. He didn't want to listen to House talk about his father. Chase hadn't thought his father could ever hurt him again. Not after walking out on him and his mum. But finding out he had died and that he hadn't considered Chase worthy of being told he was dying. Not being willing to even give Chase a chance to say goodbye to him. That had hurt more than anything that had come before. More than Chase would ever willingly admit too. He had done his best to bury that pain, but between Olivia's visit and House's persistant, the pain was rolling over him in waves. He could feel himself shaking as he gripped the envelope.
Only to have it snatched out of his grasp by House. Who opened it and removed the papers. "Sign it and I'll send it in for you," he said, offering Chase a pen.
He was too tired to argue anymore. Taking the pen, Chase scribbled his name where House pointed, then he deliberately set the pen down and turned to go. He was relieved when House let him leave. By the time he got in his car, Chase was shaking so hard he had to clench his jaw to keep his teeth from clacking together.
He was angry. Too angry to think straight. But he managed to calm himself enough to drive to the Fitness Center. Once there he headed straight for the locker room, undoing his combination and grabbing his swim trunks. He tried to swim at least twice a week but had lapsed a bit of late. Tonight he needed the physical activity. Without it he felt he might explode.
So Chase swam lap after lap until his muscle quivered and burned. Then he hauled himself out of the pool, took a quick shower, changed into the extra sweats he kept stashed in his locker, then he drove home. Dropping his things by the door, Chase headed for the kitchen. He hadn't eaten since lunch so he knew he needed to get something in him. He managed half a bologna sandwich before he gave up. He washed away the taste with a can of coke, then he poured himself a glass of red wine.
Making his way to the livingroom, Chase turned on the TV then dropped the remote. He found himself heading into his bedroom and opening his bedtable drawer. Inside was the letter Olivia had sent him after his father had died. A short and to the point letter telling him that Rowan was proud of him and that his father was sorry he hadn't been there for him. They were nothing but pretty lies but they had meant something to Robert. More than they should have but he had let himself believe in them. He had let himself take some comfort from them. But now they just burned inside him, making him angry, so he ripped the letter into tiny shreds of paper that he tossed in the kitchen trash can with the remains of his bologna sandwich.
He stood at the counter for a long time, until the roar in his ears faded away and the anger receded. Now he felt empty again. Empty and aching as he returned to the living room and reached for his wine. Raising the glass he made a toast to his father. "Cheers, dad. Even dead you're fucking me up." Bringing the glass to his lips, Chase downed the contents in a few gulps. Then he got up and went into the kitchen to refill his glass.
As he poured he thought about the money. About what he might do with it. Maybe he'd give it all to the local Catholic church. That would have pissed his father off for sure. But in truth Chase knew he wouldn't do anything with the money. He'd just leave it where it was and try to forget it existed.
Heading back to the couch, he sat down and held the refilled glass of wine in his hand as he watched TV. He didn't even care what program was on. He just watched hour after hour, until he fell asleep at 3am. He didn't feel the full glass tip out of his hand. He didn't see the carpet staining red.
THE END...of part 3