a/n: This is a little romance between the Haruhi and each host club member.

It's supposed to be kind of silly, so if characters get a tad OOC from time to time, it's the humor. But overall, it's supposed to just be a cute oneshot. Enjoy, and please review (constructive criticism is best, as long as it's nice!). xD

"I-I just don't understand her, Kyouya! My charms, my good looks… it's like they mean nothing to her! It is like she is a goddess, and I, only a mere mortal, cannot hope to catch her eyes. Oh, her beautiful, luminous brown-"

"Please," Kyouya said, rubbing his temples and shooting his friend a cold glare, "I can't concentrate on these numbers with you babbling on like that."

He turned back to the black ledger, the solid ink, but still his pen wouldn't move. The truth was that Kyouya was getting touchier about Haruhi lately. At first, he had been completely, utterly supportive of his friend. After all, it was easy to see that Tamaki was truly in love.

But then, Kyouya had started feeling flutter and floaty feelings toward her. Kind of like the feeling he got while counting how his money. He couldn't let Tamaki find out. Never for a million yen. Now, raise that to fifty million and he would be happy to consider doing business with you…

The twins burst in, grinning devilishly.

"We," Hikaru stated evilly, "have just acquired something of immense value."

"Immense," Kaoru added, joining hands with his brother and grinning in cruel glee, "immense, immense value."

The two looked each other in the eyes, mirroring the other's demonic expression.

Kyouya brought his pen back down to his paper, continued to write. "Tell me or get out of here."

"Don't be so mean, Mom! The kids have something to tell us." He looked at them hopefully. "About your sister?"

"You mean Haruhi?" Kaoru clarified.

"We have evidence that our host club princess is in love." The twins exchanged a sad look, but then turned back to the rest of the group. Kyouya's pen had raised for just the briefest moment from its scratching, and Tamaki had fainted.

As soon as Haruhi had told them apart, they knew she'd be the one for them. First they'd have to find out how to get her to notice them. Of course, technically they would be rivals.

But the twins figured that they would be willing to share.

"I'd get her on weekends and after school," Kaoru said, pointing to a chart he made.

"No fair! You get to go out on dates with her!"

"You get her during school. And we're with her all day."

Hikaru pondered for a moment.

"Let's just share her all the time."

Kaoru thought for a moment, then crumpled the paper. "Deal."

They exchanged mischievous glances. Their Haruhi was not in love, but it was all part of their plan.

Their goal? Well, mostly to cause chaos. But deep down, they hoped to get some sort of reaction out of Haruhi, a hint at which host club member secretly floated her boat…

Kyouya poked Tamaki with his shoe. The host club president came to.

"Wha- What happened? Oh, Mommy, I had the worst dream that our daughter was in love with-"

"She is," stated Kyouya. Tamaki sputtered, and then sunk down against the wall, looking pale.

He gave a bored look to the twins. "Would you care to continue with your story?"

Hikaru cleared his throat and stepped forward. "Well-"

"Usa-chan wants to hear about who's in love with Haruhi!"

The group turned around to find the two seniors, Hunny and Mori, standing in the doorway.

"Come in then," Kaoru said, "but keep it down. We can't have any customers – or anyone, really – find out about Haruhi's true identity!"

Mori just nodded, serious as usual. No, it wouldn't do to have Haruhi leave the host club. That would be sad. Of course, he would stay on for Hunny, but it wouldn't be nearly as enjoyable without Haruhi. Her smile always brightened his day.

Hunny skipped into the room. "If this guy hurts her, Usa-chan will make him pay!" He smiled, squeezing his bunny. The host club paled, each one hoping that once they held Haruhi's heart they wouldn't break it.

"She's been acting strange lately," Hikaru explained in a whisper. The host club had crept closer to hear him, obviously starving for information. "Blushing and whatnot."

"My daughter has been blushing around other men!" Tamki moaned. He was ignored.

"I hadn't noticed," Kyouya said coolly, pushing up his glasses. Secretly, he wondered why he hadn't been the first to notice. After all, he was supposed to be the most observant of the host club.

"And there're these." To accompany his words, Kaoru laid down a bundle of photographs.

There was one of Haruhi, blushing. There was one of her in a cute party outfit, looking nervous. There was even one of her… sitting at a table… with… a boy!

Tamaki fainted again.

Kyouya tried to examine the photographs, but Kaoru scooped them up.

"Where did you get those?"

"Don't ask, and I won't tell."

Kyouya didn't ask. He had to admit that he was proud of the twins; he had raised his children well.

"That guy is in my class," Hunny commented.

The whole group automatically turned to him. Except Tamaki. He was still lying on the floor, though it seemed as though he was dreaming now. He mumbled certain things, although 'bento' was the only intelligible word.

"My, my," Kyouya said, a smirk appearing on his face, "what shall we do with him…?"

Tamaki jumped back to life. "We must find that boy and preserve my daughter's innocence!"

"She's been kissed before," Hikaru pointed out, rolling his eyes. Tamaki acted like he hadn't heard him.

"Hunny, what is this boy's name?"

Hunny screwed up his face in thought. The club crowded around him in anticipation.

Finally, he beamed. "I forget!"

"Mori?" Tamaki asked eagerly.

Mori shook his head. He knew what the twins were up to, and he wanted to say something to reassure Tamaki, but he didn't want to break his silence streak.

"Then we must search the school until we find him!"

"This place is much too big for that."

"Believe, Kyouya! All you have to do is BELIEVE!"

"……"

And thus, the host club came to be skulking through the halls of Ouran, armed with binoculars and a lethally cute pink rabbit.

"Lord, we've been sitting her for five hours without any progress!"

One of the twins had offered this complaint every two minutes for the last three hours.

Tamaki just sat like a statue, his eyes glued to the binoculars.

And Haruhi walked by.

At first, she didn't see them.

They crept behind her, hoping for a hint who or where her love might be.

She turned around, and they froze. "What are you doing?" She asked calmly

"Um… nothing at all, Haruhi! We were merely searching the grounds for an elusive bird. Yes, Haruhi, we've become birdwatchers!"

Kyouya and the twins slapped their heads into their palms.

Now Haruhi was suspicious.

"Tamaki-senpai," she asked, gritting her teeth, "tell me what the host club is doing in the hallway with binoculars?"

All of a sudden, he was kneeling before her with puppy dog eyes. "Oh, Haruhi! What is this rumor about seeing a boy? Daddy doesn't approve!"

All of a sudden, Haruhi felt simulateneous weight on her shoulders.

"We know you're with someone," Kaoru said, keeping the laughter out of his voice.

"So just tell us… does he really mean more to you than us?" Hikaru breathed into her ear.

Haruhi blinked, just a tiny bit surprised.

Mori put a strong, gentle hand on her head, and looked at her curiously as if to say Is it really true?

"Haruhi," Kyouya spoke up, adjusting his glasses, "may I just say that if you choose to pursue a relationship with someone the host club has not approved… we will be forced to suspend you from the host club? You will be unable to pay your debt, and thereafter thrown from Ouran for deceiving the entire student populace and destroying valuable school property."

Haruhi paled.

A love song started playing. It was Tamaki, with a dreamy look on his face that would make any other girl swoon.

The twins pushed him off the piano bench. "No props allowed," Hikaru hissed.

Haruhi looked to her left. Kyouya had crept up.

"Haruhi… I think it could be arranged to halve your debt…" he scrawled something on a torn slip of paper and handed it to her. Haruhi looked at it, not knowing if she should pocket it or give it back. The twins glared at him. "No bribing, either!"

Haruhi felt a small body and looked down to see who was clutching her leg."I will really miss Haru-chan if Kyou-chan kicks her out," Hunny said, tears spilling from his eyes.

Haruhi took a deep breath.

"You won't really kick me out. Will you?"

The music stopped playing, and everyone was left speechless. Especially the twins.

"I mean, it was just one date," she looked placidly up at the group, "and I was just doing it to be kind. We're just friends."

"What?"

Mori had spoken. Of course, he hadn't sounded particularly surprised, but it was surprise nonetheless, and any plain emotion on Mori was… well, major.

Tamaki was taking deep breathes. Kyouya looked stunned. Mori fidgeted slightly. The twins had frozen in place, wide-eyed. Hunny just looked up at her curiously.

"Arai and I. We went on a date."

"But those photos…" Kyouya looked at the twins, his glasses glinting dangerously.

"Fakes! They were fakes!" Karoru admitted. "We photoshopped them."
"They took forever, but they were worth it for the look on you face, Lord," Hikaru added proudly. Then he snapped back into the current situation, and glanced fearfully at Haruhi.

"What photographs?" she said, narrowing her eyes.

They all ignored her.

Kyouya flipped open his cell phone. "Yes? Yes, you know my file on a certain Arai? Make sure that that same Arai is banned from the country."

"No!"

Tamaki began to weep. "Haruhi is defending him! My daughter is in love… with… with…"

The twins glared at her.

Hunny joined Tamaki in juvenile tears.

Mori patted Hunny on the back, a disappointed look in his eyes.

"What's wrong with you?" Haruhi asked, finally snapping. They were all quiet, even Tamaki.

"I mean, why do you all care so much who I go out with? Arai's a really nice guy, and besides, you have no right to interfere with my personal life!"

It was Hunny who spoke first. He just smiled in a rather wistful, un-Hunny way, and said:

"Because. We care about you, Haru-chan!"

There was a pause. Haruhi took a good look at each of them.

"I care about all of you."

Tamaki's eyes filled with tears of joy. "Oh, Haruhi! I… I.. I lo-"

"Haru-chan!" Hunny cried, jumping into her arms. Tamaki looked at him in a rather put-out way.
Mori smiled widely, a great, friendly smile that made others want to smile, too.

Kyouya, on the other hand, looked surprised, unusually readable.

The twins were silent. Kaoru reached for Hikaru's hand, and they stood there

quietly looking as happy as a cat who'd just caught a mouse. Of course, they were a little miffed… their plan hadn't gone so well. But to hear those words: "I care about you…"

"I don't think our plan really worked, Takashi."

"Mmm."

"We still have no idea who Haru likes, even though we went through all that trouble giving the twins an idea."

"Mmm-hmm."

"But you know what?"

"Mmm?"

"I think soon. Soon she'll realize what's going on. And then she'll decide whether or not she wants to acknowledge it."

"She has been rather in the dark."

"That's what we love about her, I guess."