Chapter 21 Paper dreams

The days after the memory came clearer and clearer, though he didn't get a view with it, only hearing her voice saying she loved him, and he could feel her holding his hand. It had crossed his mind; had she said this while he was in a coma?

He took Marcus with him to check on the fences and to learn the guy ride a horse properly. He could sit on it, but that was mostly it. So they took things slow. 'I've been wondering', the blonde guy said, 'what is it like to be in a coma?' Alex looked beside him, watching the city boy and his surprising question. 'Uhm, well just ... uh ...' He didn't really know. 'Do you remember all things that happened before the accident?' Alex nodded, but he mostly wanted to forget it. 'And during the coma?' Marcus was a talkative guy and they got along pretty well, so Alex wasn't too surprised with all the questions, mostly the subject.

'I'm not sure.' Marcus glared at him and he thought it was interesting. When he was little he always had the dream to become a doctor, and although it had turned out totally different, he was still interested in things like this. 'You know my aunt could remember things being said to her while she was in a coma.'

Alex' attention grew. 'She did?' 'Yeah, just little things, also what the nurses said.' They rode a little further, before Alex started to talk again. He tried hard to remember. 'I think I can remember something.' Marcus looked questioning at him. 'I think a nurse said something like she wanted to see my beautiful eyes.' His friend smirked. 'And than you opened your eyes and you saw a hot nurse, who turned you on. That's a fantasy Alex!'

Alex grinned at him. 'No not that fantasy, I mean, really ...' He kept silent for a moment. 'And ... okay don't start laughing.' Marcus looked at him and gave him the assureness he wouldn't laugh. 'Okay, I keep hearing things and dreaming it.' They stood still. 'I just keep hearing 'I love you. You're the only man I've ever really loved.'' Marcus didn't think it was laughable or remarkable. 'Well, that must be your wife. What's her name again?' 'Fiona ...' Alex tried to skip her name and image immediately adding to himself she would be his ex-wife soon. 'It's not her.'

'What?' Marcus said intrigued. 'It's not Fiona, it's Stevie's voice I hear.' It was a big deal saying it, but Alex had to get it off his chest. 'Stevie?' The dark guy nodded. 'Well that's good isn't it? I mean she's pretty hot, uh?' That remark impressed Alex, not really knowing what to say next. 'Maybe I'm making it up.'

'Well, if it is real, would you mind?' Marcus now wanted to know the whole story. 'Uhm ... no I think, I mean she's my best mate for a long time. I guess she loves me in a certain way.' 'Like in 'the only man I ever loved'?' Alex stared at him again. 'Uhm, well ... it could be.' 'Just ask her'. Marcus had his direct way of acting, but it wasn't that easy to Alex. What if he was wrong, and if she really was in love with him, why was she with Riley? It didn't make sense.

'Nah, I can't ...' 'Hadn't expected you to be like this', Marcus grinned. Alex gave him a stare. 'It's not that simple okay!' 'Well let's put it this way, what do yóu feel for her?' It was a very confronting question Alex realized right away. '... she's ...' He saw Marcus looking at him in a way he would only give up if he got a decent answer. 'She ... she's nice.' His friend laughed. 'She's nice, you're sure?' Alex got a bit annoyed. 'She's sweet, funny, beautiful, a bit well, she's Stevie!'. He blurted it out. Marcus' face was covered with a grin that said enough to Alex. 'She's into your system, mate!'

Sometime later Alex had shown how to repair the fences, and now it was Marcus' turn, but instead of paying attention to his friend's way of working Alex' mind wandered off again. Thinking of Stevie. Could he really have feelings for her, his best mate? All kinds of memories ran through his mind, but the one that really caught him, was the moment she had found him near his Ute, after all the lies had broken him down. How it had felt ... how he ... how he almost kissed her. But she had turned her face away and it made Alex insecure. Maybe he had dreamt her words; maybe he just wanted her to say these words, while she wasn't into him at all.

Days later Alex was sitting at the kitchen table; forms were lying in front of him. Annulment papers.

These tiresome paper dreams

He was about to divorce. Of course it got to him. It was something pretty heavy and he sighed. There we go, Alex thought, while he signed them. The door opened and Stevie walked in. 'Oy, here you are.' He didn't really look up, but she saw him staring at the papers. 'Uhm, am I interrupting something. I can come back later if you want?' He now looked up and stared into her brown eyes.

You don't pull my strings
Cause I'm a better man
Moving on to better things

'Uhm, no'. It was the first time Alex saw her after he realized he had feelings for her and it gave him a weird feeling in his stomach. 'Just ... divorce papers.' 'Oww ...', Stevie said, while she sat down, at the left side of the table. 'Did you talk to her?' She was glad the divorce was about to happen and Fiona could really belong to the past, but she saw a strange look in Alex' eyes. He shook his head. 'No, it was all up to the lawyers.' Stevie nodded. 'Well be sure she signs them, otherwise she shows up years later telling she's still your wife.' She thought of Jarred right away. Alex smirked. 'Thanks for the advice. This time I'll take it.'

They exchanged a few sentences about what was up lately, when Stevie remembered what was the main cause to see Alex, except from the fact she loved just paying a visit.

Stevie was unsure if this was the right moment and Alex could see there was something on her mind. It made him grin about the way she could act. She stood up and fumbled a piece of paper out of her pocket, which didn't really want to work along. Alex still glared at her, and it amused him. 'Do you need help?' His smirk reached her immediately and she almost turned red. 'Noooo ... wait.' She was annoyed with herself for being this clumsy and a staring Alex didn't help either, especially when his question brought in a thought of him coming closer and reaching for her pocket.

I love her because she moves in her own way
Well she came to my place just to hear about my day

'Here!', she handed the paper relieved. 'Uhm, well you kinda have to sign it for Rose to confirm she can become a jillaroo at Killarney.' Alex stared at it and looked up at her hopeful face. She could be so cute, he remarked. 'Let's see, well I guess I can write down another autograph today. I'm popular.'

I'm a better man
Moving on to better things

The Kooks – She moved in her own way