~*~ Silken smoke ~*~ Chapter 4
In the arms of an angel
A/N: Here is chapter 4 and yes it's a lemon. ish, I tried not to get too graphic, I know Yoko I'm bad but it's mostly metaphors and stuff. I won't be doing any more lemons so this is my first and my last. Disclaimer: Escaflowne does not belong to me, Angel Belongs to Sarah Mclachlan.
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He walked down the corridors absentmindedly, not knowing where his feet were taking him. He ran into Merle in his withdrawn journey.
~ Spend all you time waiting. For that second chance. For a break that would make it okay.
"Lord Van? What's the matter?"
He approached her and embraced her, painfully. Van felt something tighten in his chest at the thought of losing his life long friend and knowing that this maybe the last time he holds her. He bit his lip, keeping his tears at bay. Sensing the tension in the atmosphere she breaks away from his hold.
"There's something wrong!"
He stared at her in silence.
~ There's always some reason to feel not good enough. And it's hard at the end of the day..
"Tell me!" she demanded
He only smiled at her. That sweet, comforting smile he wore quieted her fears. Her featured softened as she listened.
"Oh Merle, you're my best friend, and have been all my life. You've stayed with me even during the bleakest times."
Her eyes started to weld with tears. Something troubled him and she was a little uncomfortable with his words.
" You've always been so compassionate, so selfless. Heh, remember that one time when Hitomi went back to the mystic moon the first time and you confronted me on the roof of that barn. You gave me that advice; that made me go and get her back. And just a little while ago you told me again to go find her and bring her back. All along you put your feelings on the line just to make me happy. But the truth is, you've always made me happy. I'm so grateful that you have always been there for me. I hope that you'll always remain strong."
~ I need some distraction, oh beautiful release. Memories seep through my veins.
The tears streamed down her cheeks. She ran up and threw her arms around his waist.
"Lord Van! You've been so much more than a friend to me! I've always had a. feeling for you." Looking in his face.
"I love you Lord Van. I never could come to tell you that," she blushed "I've always loved you but. I knew I couldn't work, so I just loved you from afar."
She had calmed downed but still sniffled occasionally when she spoke.
"I was jealous at first when I knew that you loved Hitomi, but after a while I kinda excepted it. I knew that you would never love me like I love you, but I didn't want you to stay alone. So I decided I wanted you and hitomi to be happy together."
~ It may be empty, oh weightless and maybe.
"Merle." He was speechless, he knew that she loved him but he was never prepared of what to say in case she admitted to it. He wanted more than anything to offer words of comfort but was powerless to do so. He just wrapped his arms around and embraced her once more.
" I need to see Hitomi."
~ I'll find peace tonight.
She gave him a curious look yet suppressed a smile and showed him the way to her room. "She's sick so Milerna sent her to bed" she said before she left him at the door of her room. He gave her a whispery "thank you."
He winced as the hinges squeaked when opening her door. Walking to her bed he found her sound asleep under many layers of blankets. She looked peaceful and angelic, just the same as he found her the other night. Her long hair was spilled on her white pillow. The moon pooled in creating a white eerie light. He stood there a moment, staring at her content face burning the image in his memory to get him through his trials ahead. He cupped his hand on her cheek, which was still cold. He bent down and captured her lips. She awakened; he took notice of this and retreated slowly with a small smack.
"Van? Are you ok?" Her innocent green eyes looked up into his, only a suppressed love burning in their depths.
He just smiled down on her; 'she too is compassionate and selfless just like Merle'. She gave him a curious look. He sat down on the bed next to her.
They sat in an uncomfortable silence for a while, Hitomi decided to break the ice.
"There's something on you mind." Said abruptly
"Why do you say that?" He chuckled. Not really wanting to tell her the truth.
"Well why else would you come up here? And I can see it in your eyes."
"I could have been worried because you sick."
She stared at him skeptically "Are you sure that's your only reason?"
"No." She braced herself; there was a note of sadness in his tone.
"I'm leaving tomorrow. There's been word of a threat to attack Fanelia. Allen is coming with me and we're going to stop them before they reach us. The Army will come with us, all of the men here. Allen is saying goodbye to Eries and I had come here to say goodbye to you." He said surly.
Hitomi paused, stunned at the sudden message. She felt a little resentful, as if his words were an intruder, like acid, she lapped them up and concealed them.
"Will you use Escaflowne?" she asked nervously, remembering that he had merged with the Escaflowne and was subject to its damage.
"I'll have to and Allen is using Scherazade, all of the soldiers will get Guymelefs of their own also."
As he finished a question burned in her heart and cut her deep for fear of the answer. She swallowed hard; she needed to know but was afraid to.
". Will I . ever see you again?" choking on her words, tears seared her eyes. Closing them she listened for his answer.
"I don't know.."
She clenched her teeth, trying to keep her tears from showing, but it was no use, they careened down her cheeks. His words set her soul aflame. She felt very nauseous, insignificant, petrified, cheated, malicious and depressed all at once. She wanted to scream till her lungs burst, but conveyed her emotions in silent tears. She felt weak as Van watched her cry. He wrapped his arms around her; she wished he didn't do that. As soon as he embraced her she let it all out, she felt so helpless sobbing in his shoulder. She wanted so bad to relinquish her tears and be strong, but to no avail. She would eventually succumb to her yearn to exhale, and found it to be better to not resist, that it would pass. Van bottled his emotions still, wanting so bad to release them and finally relax but refused to show his weakness. Knowing that this may be the last time he holds her was tearing her to pieces, praying that the moment that they break apart would never come. Her shaken sobs soon subsided; she looked into his face. Van may not have weep with her but his emotions shown through his face. In her opinion, he looked like a guilty puppy or a disappointed child; she had never seen this stone-hard warrior portray this look of sorrow. She wanted to make that sorrow dispel. Caressing his face then running her fingers in his charcoal hair, looking in his warm, brown orbs, she pulled him in for a passionate kiss. Holding her tightly he felt their heartbeats reverberating off one another.
~ In the arms of an Angel. Fly away from here. From this dark cold hotel room. And the endlessness that you feel.
'Is this our last kiss?' The thought disturbed him; it would eat him alive if he let it. That could be the question that would make him lose the war. He would not think this way, if anything were to happen to him that he was going to live in the moment. Whatever life throws at him he was going to fight it, to protect her and the ones he love; to come back to her safely and stay with her for eternity. His determination burned in his belly like fire in the pit of a dragon's. He deepened the kiss, becoming more aggressive with every lash of his tongue. He wanted her forever and if not forever, then tonight. His hand found it's way under her shirt, supporting the small of her back as he laid her down. She gasped as his mouth moved to her chin and down her throat.
~ You are brought from the wreckage. Of your silent reverie.
In a haze of passion their clothes cluttered the floor, shed slowly yet with seeming haste. He didn't intend to make love with her, only to say goodbye. But he didn't want to leave without giving himself to her. His long, magnificent wings sprouted from his back spontaneously.
~ Here in the arms in an angel. May you find some comfort here.
The two lovers floated in a sea of passion, their bodies aflame with desire. The sensation he was producing were heavenly, her breathy moans were enough to confirm that he was doing the right thing. Their bodies now joined as one soul.
~ So tired of this street light, at every where you turn. There's vultures and thieves at your back. The storm keeps on twistin', keep on buildin' the lies. That you make up for all that you lack.
After 4 long years they were finally back together again, but their fantasy would be tragically skewed as their harsh reality sets in with the rising sun in the hours to come. It was like stop and go. They both wished for a perpetual night, the sun should not bother them. To take Van away with him. Alas, reality is never fair, however this night belonged to them alone and no one can steal this memory.
~ It don't make no difference, skatin' one last time. It's easier to believe.
Their voices mingled as they cried one another's name, bodies still joined. Hitomi looked at Van innocently and whispered "come back to me safely" He nodded silently, feeling guilty because he couldn't make any promises. But he didn't want to think of this now; it only depressed him more. Sealing her lips with his own to give her some sort of closure. His wings hovering above them both as a canopy.
~ In this sweet madness, oh this glorious sadness. It brings me to my knees.
Exhausted, Van rolled over on his back inviting Hitomi to lay with him. They once again were lying on a blanket of feathers. She rested her head on his chest and wrapped her arms around him. Van Felt complete in her arms, he was home, she was the other half of his soul. Hitomi speaking in the darkness startled him a bit. "I love you Van" echoed through his awareness.
~ In the arms of the angel Fly away from here
"Be strong Hitomi, I'll protect you. Let's not say goodbye just yet, it's only see you in a while." Not exactly what she wanted to hear but it was good enough, at least he is going to try to return safely. With morning only a few hours away, she wanted to spend every waking moment in his presence. Her effort was in vain as sleep took control. The same soon happened for Van, but he needed it for tomorrow.
~ From this dark, cold hotel room. And the endlessness that you feel. You are brought from the wreckage. Of your silent reverie.
Morning came all to quickly for a rude awakening. A Light blue aluminized the room; it was early enough to find Allen and leave. Van awoke holding her in the spoons position. It was easy for him to get out of bed, even if he was relentless to do so.
~ In the arms of an angel. May you find some comfort here.
Gathering his beige pants and red lace-up shirt that was standard for Van. Looking back at the scene of last nights' bliss and his angel tucked protectively under her blankets. He walked over to her, kissed her on top of her head and whispered in her ear "I love you too." And walked out her door.
~ Here in the arms of an angel. May you find some comfort here.
{Chapter 5 coming soon.}
A/N: Here is chapter 4 and yes it's a lemon. ish, I tried not to get too graphic, I know Yoko I'm bad but it's mostly metaphors and stuff. I won't be doing any more lemons so this is my first and my last. Disclaimer: Escaflowne does not belong to me, Angel Belongs to Sarah Mclachlan.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
He walked down the corridors absentmindedly, not knowing where his feet were taking him. He ran into Merle in his withdrawn journey.
~ Spend all you time waiting. For that second chance. For a break that would make it okay.
"Lord Van? What's the matter?"
He approached her and embraced her, painfully. Van felt something tighten in his chest at the thought of losing his life long friend and knowing that this maybe the last time he holds her. He bit his lip, keeping his tears at bay. Sensing the tension in the atmosphere she breaks away from his hold.
"There's something wrong!"
He stared at her in silence.
~ There's always some reason to feel not good enough. And it's hard at the end of the day..
"Tell me!" she demanded
He only smiled at her. That sweet, comforting smile he wore quieted her fears. Her featured softened as she listened.
"Oh Merle, you're my best friend, and have been all my life. You've stayed with me even during the bleakest times."
Her eyes started to weld with tears. Something troubled him and she was a little uncomfortable with his words.
" You've always been so compassionate, so selfless. Heh, remember that one time when Hitomi went back to the mystic moon the first time and you confronted me on the roof of that barn. You gave me that advice; that made me go and get her back. And just a little while ago you told me again to go find her and bring her back. All along you put your feelings on the line just to make me happy. But the truth is, you've always made me happy. I'm so grateful that you have always been there for me. I hope that you'll always remain strong."
~ I need some distraction, oh beautiful release. Memories seep through my veins.
The tears streamed down her cheeks. She ran up and threw her arms around his waist.
"Lord Van! You've been so much more than a friend to me! I've always had a. feeling for you." Looking in his face.
"I love you Lord Van. I never could come to tell you that," she blushed "I've always loved you but. I knew I couldn't work, so I just loved you from afar."
She had calmed downed but still sniffled occasionally when she spoke.
"I was jealous at first when I knew that you loved Hitomi, but after a while I kinda excepted it. I knew that you would never love me like I love you, but I didn't want you to stay alone. So I decided I wanted you and hitomi to be happy together."
~ It may be empty, oh weightless and maybe.
"Merle." He was speechless, he knew that she loved him but he was never prepared of what to say in case she admitted to it. He wanted more than anything to offer words of comfort but was powerless to do so. He just wrapped his arms around and embraced her once more.
" I need to see Hitomi."
~ I'll find peace tonight.
She gave him a curious look yet suppressed a smile and showed him the way to her room. "She's sick so Milerna sent her to bed" she said before she left him at the door of her room. He gave her a whispery "thank you."
He winced as the hinges squeaked when opening her door. Walking to her bed he found her sound asleep under many layers of blankets. She looked peaceful and angelic, just the same as he found her the other night. Her long hair was spilled on her white pillow. The moon pooled in creating a white eerie light. He stood there a moment, staring at her content face burning the image in his memory to get him through his trials ahead. He cupped his hand on her cheek, which was still cold. He bent down and captured her lips. She awakened; he took notice of this and retreated slowly with a small smack.
"Van? Are you ok?" Her innocent green eyes looked up into his, only a suppressed love burning in their depths.
He just smiled down on her; 'she too is compassionate and selfless just like Merle'. She gave him a curious look. He sat down on the bed next to her.
They sat in an uncomfortable silence for a while, Hitomi decided to break the ice.
"There's something on you mind." Said abruptly
"Why do you say that?" He chuckled. Not really wanting to tell her the truth.
"Well why else would you come up here? And I can see it in your eyes."
"I could have been worried because you sick."
She stared at him skeptically "Are you sure that's your only reason?"
"No." She braced herself; there was a note of sadness in his tone.
"I'm leaving tomorrow. There's been word of a threat to attack Fanelia. Allen is coming with me and we're going to stop them before they reach us. The Army will come with us, all of the men here. Allen is saying goodbye to Eries and I had come here to say goodbye to you." He said surly.
Hitomi paused, stunned at the sudden message. She felt a little resentful, as if his words were an intruder, like acid, she lapped them up and concealed them.
"Will you use Escaflowne?" she asked nervously, remembering that he had merged with the Escaflowne and was subject to its damage.
"I'll have to and Allen is using Scherazade, all of the soldiers will get Guymelefs of their own also."
As he finished a question burned in her heart and cut her deep for fear of the answer. She swallowed hard; she needed to know but was afraid to.
". Will I . ever see you again?" choking on her words, tears seared her eyes. Closing them she listened for his answer.
"I don't know.."
She clenched her teeth, trying to keep her tears from showing, but it was no use, they careened down her cheeks. His words set her soul aflame. She felt very nauseous, insignificant, petrified, cheated, malicious and depressed all at once. She wanted to scream till her lungs burst, but conveyed her emotions in silent tears. She felt weak as Van watched her cry. He wrapped his arms around her; she wished he didn't do that. As soon as he embraced her she let it all out, she felt so helpless sobbing in his shoulder. She wanted so bad to relinquish her tears and be strong, but to no avail. She would eventually succumb to her yearn to exhale, and found it to be better to not resist, that it would pass. Van bottled his emotions still, wanting so bad to release them and finally relax but refused to show his weakness. Knowing that this may be the last time he holds her was tearing her to pieces, praying that the moment that they break apart would never come. Her shaken sobs soon subsided; she looked into his face. Van may not have weep with her but his emotions shown through his face. In her opinion, he looked like a guilty puppy or a disappointed child; she had never seen this stone-hard warrior portray this look of sorrow. She wanted to make that sorrow dispel. Caressing his face then running her fingers in his charcoal hair, looking in his warm, brown orbs, she pulled him in for a passionate kiss. Holding her tightly he felt their heartbeats reverberating off one another.
~ In the arms of an Angel. Fly away from here. From this dark cold hotel room. And the endlessness that you feel.
'Is this our last kiss?' The thought disturbed him; it would eat him alive if he let it. That could be the question that would make him lose the war. He would not think this way, if anything were to happen to him that he was going to live in the moment. Whatever life throws at him he was going to fight it, to protect her and the ones he love; to come back to her safely and stay with her for eternity. His determination burned in his belly like fire in the pit of a dragon's. He deepened the kiss, becoming more aggressive with every lash of his tongue. He wanted her forever and if not forever, then tonight. His hand found it's way under her shirt, supporting the small of her back as he laid her down. She gasped as his mouth moved to her chin and down her throat.
~ You are brought from the wreckage. Of your silent reverie.
In a haze of passion their clothes cluttered the floor, shed slowly yet with seeming haste. He didn't intend to make love with her, only to say goodbye. But he didn't want to leave without giving himself to her. His long, magnificent wings sprouted from his back spontaneously.
~ Here in the arms in an angel. May you find some comfort here.
The two lovers floated in a sea of passion, their bodies aflame with desire. The sensation he was producing were heavenly, her breathy moans were enough to confirm that he was doing the right thing. Their bodies now joined as one soul.
~ So tired of this street light, at every where you turn. There's vultures and thieves at your back. The storm keeps on twistin', keep on buildin' the lies. That you make up for all that you lack.
After 4 long years they were finally back together again, but their fantasy would be tragically skewed as their harsh reality sets in with the rising sun in the hours to come. It was like stop and go. They both wished for a perpetual night, the sun should not bother them. To take Van away with him. Alas, reality is never fair, however this night belonged to them alone and no one can steal this memory.
~ It don't make no difference, skatin' one last time. It's easier to believe.
Their voices mingled as they cried one another's name, bodies still joined. Hitomi looked at Van innocently and whispered "come back to me safely" He nodded silently, feeling guilty because he couldn't make any promises. But he didn't want to think of this now; it only depressed him more. Sealing her lips with his own to give her some sort of closure. His wings hovering above them both as a canopy.
~ In this sweet madness, oh this glorious sadness. It brings me to my knees.
Exhausted, Van rolled over on his back inviting Hitomi to lay with him. They once again were lying on a blanket of feathers. She rested her head on his chest and wrapped her arms around him. Van Felt complete in her arms, he was home, she was the other half of his soul. Hitomi speaking in the darkness startled him a bit. "I love you Van" echoed through his awareness.
~ In the arms of the angel Fly away from here
"Be strong Hitomi, I'll protect you. Let's not say goodbye just yet, it's only see you in a while." Not exactly what she wanted to hear but it was good enough, at least he is going to try to return safely. With morning only a few hours away, she wanted to spend every waking moment in his presence. Her effort was in vain as sleep took control. The same soon happened for Van, but he needed it for tomorrow.
~ From this dark, cold hotel room. And the endlessness that you feel. You are brought from the wreckage. Of your silent reverie.
Morning came all to quickly for a rude awakening. A Light blue aluminized the room; it was early enough to find Allen and leave. Van awoke holding her in the spoons position. It was easy for him to get out of bed, even if he was relentless to do so.
~ In the arms of an angel. May you find some comfort here.
Gathering his beige pants and red lace-up shirt that was standard for Van. Looking back at the scene of last nights' bliss and his angel tucked protectively under her blankets. He walked over to her, kissed her on top of her head and whispered in her ear "I love you too." And walked out her door.
~ Here in the arms of an angel. May you find some comfort here.
{Chapter 5 coming soon.}