AN: Thanks for all the reviews! o.o Wow! XD –dances-

Second chapter o.o.. yah n.n Might be OOC a bit, but this a humour/romance fic, so the mood is a little lighter. I'll try to keep them as much IC though o.o

Enjoy!

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Ninja For Hire

By SmexLemur, worship her!

Chapter 2: Deals and Offers Should Be Shoved Up One's Ass

"I have to WHAT!"

The villagers of Konoha abruptly stopped with whatever it was that they were doing when a loud voice yelled the former sentence. They immediately recognised it as Naruto's, before continuing their work—they were used to the loudness by now.

Anyway, back to the Hokage's office.

"Keep it down, brat, you're giving me a migraine," Tsunade said in a bored tone. Naruto glared at her, before his eyes focused on the Uchiha standing in the room, with an innocent look on his face. Well, Naruto guessed he was trying to look innocent, but he looked as if he had swallowed something very, very sour.

"Shut up, you old hag!" the blonde exclaimed, pointing a finger at said hag. "I can't believe you're actually going along with this! What kind of Hokage are you anyway? Wait, don't answer that—I'll answer it for you: You're a bad one! The worst one ever! I swear to God, the old man before you would never do something like this! You know what? I'll learn that jutsu which makes people come back from the dead and then I'll order him to kill you—it probably won't be too hard for him anyway, since you're the WORST!" Tsunade yawned during the entire rant, while Sasuke just looked at the two of them with interest. He didn't really hope he would have to endure the same—

"And YOU!" Naruto turned towards Sasuke, who blinked innocently. "What the hell are you thinking hiring ME, Uzumaki Naruto, to be your personal slave!"

"Maid," Sasuke corrected him dryly.

"Same thing, different word!" Naruto screeched, flailing his arms. "And shut up while I'm yelling at you, you goddamn bastard! How dare you embarrass me like this! I mean, I know we have our differences, but to go this far just to humiliate me! BASTARD!" Sasuke glared at the panting blonde.

"Once again, you think that everything is about you," he said, stuffing his hands in his pocket. "I need a maid since I hate cleaning and my house is a mess. Stop your whining and be a man about it."

"But why me? Take Konohamaru! Or Kiba! They're as annoying as I am!" Sasuke smirked smugly at him, before looking at Tsunade.

"Tsunade-sama, am I also allowed to give him the uniform I'd like him to wear?"

Naruto gulped.

This is not happening, This is not happening, This is not happening, This is not happening, he chanted over and over in his head.

"Of course, Sasuke," the Hokage smiled sweetly at Naruto, who was an inch away from falling to the floor and going in a foetal position.

"I am not going along with your sick fantasies!" Naruto hollered and was about to stomp off out of the office.

"Naruto, wait a minute!" Tsunade barked. "Uchiha, please wait outside while I talk to Naruto for a minute," she turned to Sasuke, who nodded with a smirk and walked outside, his hand brushing Naruto's. Said blonde immediately froze and turned red, muttering a soft 'bastard'. Once the door smacked shut, Naruto turned to Tsunade, who held up a hand.

"Don't start yelling, brat," she said. Naruto bit his lip to keep himself from it—he knew yelling wouldn't help anyway, but it did help some to get it out of his system.

"But old hag, I don't understand why I have to do this," the blonde Jounin whined. "I'm a Jounin! I can't believe you're actually handing me out to Uchiha to be his slave!"

"Maid," Tsunade corrected him.

"That's even WORSE!" Naruto barked angrily. "Let a Genin do his chores and leave me out of it!"

"Uchiha specifically asked for you, brat," Tsunade said shortly. "Anyway, I have a proposition for you." Naruto perked up a bit.

"What?" Tsunade looked a bit hesitant to start talking about whatever it was she was proposing.

"I'm old," she blurted out reluctantly. Naruto raised an eyebrow.

"I know that, Tsunade-hag."

"Don't call me that!" she snapped. Naruto blinked and waited for whatever it was came next. The Hokage sighed and turned her chair to visit the window. "Come with me outside, brat," she suddenly said. The Godaime stood up from her chair and opened the door that led to the balcony—Naruto obediently followed. "What do you see?" Naruto again raised an eyebrow, but looked over the balcony at Konoha, the villagers and the Hokage mountain where the former, and present, Hokage were carved in stone forever.

"The village, Konoha," he answered simply. Tsunade sighed again.

"What do you… feel, when you look at it?" Naruto blinked and looked again. His eyes scanned over the village—he saw several ninja, laughing and joking. He saw two lovers walking hand in hand down the street, occasionally sneaking peeks at each other—they must've recently gotten together. He saw a father and a son sharing an ice cream together (this made Naruto feel a bit nostalgic—he missed Jiraiya when it came to these things. Iruka had been like an older brother, but whenever he had been with Jiraiya, he kind of felt like he was with a father), and a mother and daughter shopping for new clothes. He saw people hugging, shaking hands. His eyes focused on a man who had apparently lost his wallet and couldn't afford the fruit he was about to buy on a market—an old lady came to his rescue by actually giving him the money for it and smiling as she did so. The man thanked her a million times, before taking her bags for her and carrying them all the way to the other side of the village.

Naruto smiled as well—this village rocked. Sure, they had treated him like crap in the past, but that's exactly what it was: the past. There were still people who ignored him, but most villagers had come to accept him. Yes, they knew he had the Kyuubi inside of him, but because he was a Jounin and had saved the villagers countless times, they began to see him instead of the fox demon. He loved the village, despite everything they had done to him.

"I feel… love," Naruto said finally, scratching the back of his head. "Damn, that sounds sappy, but it's true. I think I'd do anything to protect these people," he muttered afterwards. He hung over the balcony and didn't notice the smile on Tsunade's face.

"Very well," she said. Naruto raised his head to look at her curiously. "I'm appointing you as the next Hokage."

Naruto's mouth flew open.

"Don't give me that look, brat, you're not going to be Hokage tomorrow, or next year for that matter—you still have a lot to learn. I need to prepare you, teach you the responsibilities, rules all that jazz," she sighed. "It would be a lot easier to give someone older the job, but I think you're the best one for it. I can't think of anyone else actually when I started to think about who needed to be the next Hokage—I could only think about Swirly Fishcakes." Naruto stayed silent for a while.

"Hey! When you think about me, you think about fishcake?" he burst out. Tsunade smacked him on the head.

"Brat!" she barked. "Are you accepting the job or not?" Naruto stared at her for a moment.

"Are you serious? I've been aiming to become Hokage ever since I could crawl and you're asking me if I accept? Of course I do! So, what's the first lesson, huh? Huh? Are we going to train? Can I kick someone's ass? Tell me!"

Tsunade smirked.

"No, actually, you're going to be Sasuke's maid first," she said. Naruto dropped to the floor.

"I knew there was a catch," he muttered. Tsunade's eyes softened a bit.

"Look, it's only for two weeks and it can't be too bad. Think of it as a vacation or something—at least be glad that this isn't some life-threatening mission." Naruto stood up and sighed.

"No, life-threatening missions I can handle. Being with Sasuke for two weeks is much harder."

--

"Has he agreed?"

"Yes, he has, though I'm still a bit worried for your life when you're presenting him that." Tsunade gestured at the outfit Sasuke was holding. Said boy shrugged.

"He has to, it's part of his mission. Where is he by the way?"

"He went to collect some things from his apartment—you did want him to stay with you, right?" Sasuke nodded. "Mind telling me why you're going through all of this? Please don't give me that shit about you needing a maid. Do you really want to embarrass him or is it something else? If you hurt him Uchiha, I won't hesitate to kill you—remember that." Sasuke raised an eyebrow.

"Overprotective, are we?" Tsunade shrugged.

"That's none of your business."

"Nor is it your business what my reason is for hiring him, but since I'd hate for you to get wrinkles from worrying—" Tsunade shot him a very nasty glare, "—I'll assure you I do not intend to hurt him." A sigh of relief came from the Hokage. She hated to admit it, but she loved the little brat and indeed was a little overprotective of him. Kind of like a mother, Jiraiya had once told her.

"I merely intend to molest him," was added afterwards and before these words could really sink in, Sasuke had disappeared.

Tsunade's mouth hung open as she stared at the spot the Uchiha had once stood and a feeling of dread was left in her stomach.

…Poor Naruto.

--

Poor Naruto indeed.

"Stupid Uchiha-bastard!" he exclaimed, once he was back in his apartment. "I mean, hiring me to be his personal slave! What nerve!"

"Maid," Kyuubi corrected him automatically.

"Shut up, you stupid fox!" Naruto yelled, lowering his eyes to his stomach and glaring at it. It was quite pointless, but Naruto had the tendency to do pointless things.

"Admit it, brat, you don't really mind being in the same house as Uchiha," the blasted fox continued. Naruto could practically feel the fox grinning inside of his stomach and rolled his eyes. "At least look on the bright side: he might screw you senseless. Or you can sex him up—whatever you want. I'll even help you," Kyuubi offered. Naruto turned bright red.

"P—pervert! And that'll never happen anyway, so don't get your hopes up."

"Whatever, you can always take him in his sleep." Naruto smacked a hand on his forehead, before he continued to pack his bag.

It was going to be a long two weeks.