Not Enough

By: KaKaVegeGurl

Authors Note:

Alright so it's been over a freaking YEAR since I wrote a chapter to this. I'm not entirely sure what took me so long, because I love this fic, but I do apologize.

Sorry guys. ; I really am sorry. I'm not sure what I've been doing to have cast aside all of these lovely fanfics...

Okay, so I'm not gonna keep chatting too much because I know you all have been dying fer this one so yeh.

Onward to Chapter 4!

Please take a seat and have a nice steaming cup of yaoi everyone!

KaKaVegeGurl

Side Notes:

'...' Thoughts

Review Response:

To meg: "Sorry, sorry, I'm so sorry! I hope yer still reading, lol. ;"

Chapter 4 - Confrontation At Last

'I'm not really sure what has gotten into me lately, I just know I have to do something to make him trust me.'

'I don't really care what it is.'

'Giving the Weasleys the money they need to live and take care of each other or stopping Crabbe and Goyle from hurting other Gryffindors... I honestly don't care.'

'Whatever it takes to make up for everything I've done in the past.'

'Whatever it takes to finally be able to tell him how I feel.'

'To show him who I am.'

'That's all that really matters to me. I just want him to know that he isn't alone. And that it's not his fault.'

'Everyone needs someone. And I know he needs me. Because I know I'm the one that can make him happy. I'm the only one who can help him to forgive himself.'

'I am not a coward any more.'

Harry and Ron stood transfixed as the Slytherin Prince turned from Neville and walked away; back down the hall full of equally astonished students, back down the hall he had walked down so many times; while he taunted them, made fun of them, and embarrassed them.

Back down the hall that he would never walk through as the old Draco, ever again.

Pansy raised a brow from inside the crowd.

Draco walked across the edge of the Black Lake; staring out at a sky so blue, so full of white clouds and a sun shining as brightly as ever.

He smiled weakly as he finally pocketed his wand with shaking hands.

'Did I really, honestly just do that?'

'I'm degrading my family name. But in a sort of way it's amusing. Amusing to others, it must be, to see a Slytherin; a Malfoy, do the things that I just did.'

'One would think I was a bit out of state or under a spell of some sort. But only I know the truth.'

'I am only being me.'

'For once.'

"Malfoy."

The blond turned at the sound of his name and he knew, he knew before he even heard the voice, that Harry had been following him.

"Ah," The Slytherin said cattily, feeling the front toes of his shoes digging into the grass more then his heels, "Hello Harry."

Green eyes widened at the silkiness milking from Draco's throat, astonishment shone over the Gryffindor's tan skin more obvious then discomfort, "Wh-What do you want?"

Draco arched a brow in thought, "What do I want? You followed me, Harry. I think I should be the one asking that question."

"Cut it with the bull shit Malfoy." Harry balled a fist at his side as his jaw clenched in anger, "You don't do anything without a reason and I know you're up to something this time. I'm not blind."

"Clearly, you can see me of course, how else could you be bl-"

"Shut your trap!" The Raven-haired boy's eyebrows narrowed more, "Galleons upon gallons to Ron and you repaired Neville's nose... What do you want from me?"

Draco pocketed both his hands, nervously, "I don't want anything from you Harry."

"You're lying."

"Strong words, but too bad they're wrong." Draco stepped towards the Golden boy and smirked, "The only thing I want you to do Harry, is to help yourself."

Harry stared at him unsurely, "What do you mean?"

Draco nodded slightly and walked past him, stopping once to say one more thing, "I mean... I want you to stop cutting yourself. You're destroying perfectly good skin."

"How do yo-"

"Shh," The Slytherin hissed with his back to Harry still, he sneezed harshly and sighed, "You don't ask. You never ask. But do stop... Forgive yourself. Sirius wouldn't want you doing this to yourself, would he?"

Harry turned in shock as the blond boy walked back up to the school in silence, but fear was mounting in the Gryffindor's mind.

'Forgive yourself.'

Draco set his bag down by his bed and laid himself out over the sheets, feeling his muscles relaxing he let his hand wander up past his head and underneath the pillows to pull out an antique-looking oval shaped mirror the size of his hand.

"You know what to do."

The mirror vibrated lightly in his hands for a mere second before an image began to play out in it and sound filled his ears.

"He didn't say anything to you?"

"Well yeah, he did. But he didn't tell me why he's doing what he's doing."

Hermione stared at Harry disbelievingly, "Well what did he say?"

The Gryffindor Golden Boy shrugged his shoulders and stalked up the stairs of the Boy's Dormitories, "Hermione he hardly said anything at all, I just want to get to bed."

"But it's hardly even four!" Ron retorted.

Harry rolled his shoulders at the red head as he closed the door and walked to his bed, he lifted the mattress and pulled from under it a knife.

Draco grimaced in anger as he watched the mirror's surface.
The Gryffindor set back down the bed and walked into the bathroom, closing and locking the door, he turned on the water in the sink and pulled back his sleeve.
"I told you to stop."

Harry looked up from his breakfast and glared at the Slytherin.

Draco, however, was completely unfazed as he made his way over to the Gryffindor table, "Harry, you better stop... Get up."

"Excuse me, Malfoy. I think you're at the wrong table."

"Shut the fuck up Thomas." Draco countered, still staring down at Harry, "We need to talk and we need to talk now."

Harry rolled his eyes and turned back to his food.

The blond felt his fuse light at the sight of the Gryffindor in front of him, "You know... You made me break my mirror because you couldn't stop your stupid cut-"

Harry smacked a hand over Draco's mouth to stop him from talking, "Alright, let's talk. Outside."

"Good," The Slytherin mumbled under Harry's hand.

Green eyes glared at him darkly as the Gryffindor stood from his seat and walked out in the hallway with Draco hot on his feet, other numerous eyes followed their trip out of the Great Hall.

"First of all, I want to know how you knew."

Draco bit his lip and looked to the side, the clogginess of winter was stuffing his nose up, "I had a mirror that showed me everything you do."

"A mirror?" Draco nodded, "How long have you had it?"

"Since I was twelve."

Harry stared at him incredulously, "You've been watching me all these years!?"

The blond nodded guiltily, "Yes."

"That's..." Harry paused and thought, "That's disturbing."

Draco frowned and looked to the side in shame, "Yeah, think what ever you want."

"Obviously," The Gryffindor looked at him and stepped back a foot, "So you've seen me... You've seen me c-"

"Cutting?" Draco asked and Harry nodded slowly, "I'll admit I didn't know about it for a while. But when I did find out... I was a bit disappointed in you."

Harry bit his tongue and sat back against the wall, "I really don't know what to think about you now."

The Slytherin smiled, "Think what you want. Either way, I don't care. I just want you to stop hurting yourself. It's wrong and dangerous."

"Oh yeh? And what do you care?"

"I care a lot more then you think you know." Draco stared at him sadly, "I care a lot."

Harry looked to his left and shifted his feet, "Somehow I doubt that."

"Harry, I'm not what you think I am," The Slytherin said hesitantly, "I don't think you're gripping on to that concept."

"I don't want to grip onto anything of your's Malfoy." The Raven-haired teen said smartly, "I don't even wanna think about gripping. You're a monster like you're father. You always will be."

Draco grimaced in pain at the harshness of the other boy's words.

Harry stood up and glared at him, "And as for that. Malfoy's don't feel pain. Remember? You've been out to hurt me since we were pre-teens. And I'm positive that that's what you're trying to do now. Well you're not go-"

"Harry, honestly,"Draco felt his eyes glassing over and blurring, "I've never meant to hurt you, ever. If you would just let me help you."

"That's a laugh," The Gryffindor chuckled lightly, "Malfoy... Don't start with me. Don't you even start."

Draco frowned now, taking a step forward, "I didn't just 'start'. You don't seem to understand. It started the day I met you."

"What started?"

"Us, you and me. We started," Draco started getting this egging feeling of cliche-ness coming along, "Why won't you let me make it up to you?"

"There is no making up." Harry pushed the bangs out of his face, "I'm the 'Chosen One'. And you're a Death Eater in-training. 'Making up' fits no where in there."

The Slytherin felt a burning sense of pain wash over his body, "But I love-"

Harry raised a brow at him as the blond paused.

Draco stopped and closed his mouth, "You know what... Forget it."

"Forget what?"

"This, this all of this. I'm over it. It's gone," Draco put his hands up in defeat, "I'm tired of it. All your catty remarks. You just have to say something snarky right back at me every single time I try to tell you, but you don't listen. I'm trying to help you. I'm here to help you. I'm begging on my knees for a second chance that maybe you'll take me back and let me help you. I'm tired of it. I'm tired of loving you because honestly... You hate Malfoy. You hate him so much that you won't even let yourself meet Draco."

Harry stared in shock as the Slytherin turned and darted for the dungeons.

Ending Notes:

Alright guys! There it is!

I'll be sure to come out with Chapter 5 a lot sooner then this one did. So, so sorry! TT

Please review!?

KaKaVegeGurl