-Chapter 5 – Small Epilogue-

Lesson #5- Not everything is perfect. Nothing is actually. And some endings are just…not so 'Happily Ever After'.
After that night, Shuchi never heard from Eiri again, until one morning, three months later, Ryuichi brought in the paper.

"Sh…Shuchi…" His eyes were wide as he set the paper down on the table in front of his young spouse.

"Hm? What is it?" Shuichi blinked, eating on a piece of toast. He pulled the paper towards himself.

"R…read the first article…" He sat down, opposite of the boy, and placed his head down on his hands. Shu did so, reading the heading.

"…Local Novelist Commits…Su…suicide…" He stopped. Silence.

"Keep reading…" The elder chocked out.

"Uhn…" He bit his lower lip, reading again. "Local Novelist, Eiri Yuki, was found d…dead…in his apartment early yesterday morning…the weapon was nothing more than a small…a small pistol…"

"There's more…" The elder's head dropped further, his voice dying out.

"I can't read anymore…I…I don't want to…"

"You have to. He…he left a message…"

"…A…message…?" Shuichi choked, tears going down his cheeks once more. He read on. "The police on the scene gave us a scan of a note that was soaking in…in the blood. It read as so: "I'm sorry, Shuichi." So, it seems the…" He stopped again, unable to read further due to the massive flow of tears. "…The…"

"Shuichi…" Ryu got up, just in time to catch Shuichi as he fell out of his chair.

"It's…it's my fault…that he…that he died…" He cried harder. "It's…"

"Shuichi…don't blame yourself…" The elder held onto the younger male, keeping in his own tears.

"But, it's my fault, Ryuichi!!" He shouted, still crying. "It's My Fucking Fault!!" He jerked away from the other, only to crumple back to the ground. "My fucking…fault…"

"Shuichi…" Ryu, again, held onto him, before picking the younger one up, and heading to the couch. "Rest for now, Shuichi…"

"Why…why don't you cry…?" The boy curled up on the elder's lap.

"I want to be strong for you…" He wrapped his arms around him. "Please…it's not your fault."

Shuichi didn't say anything more as he wrapped his arms around the elder's neck, and slowly cried himself to sleep.

Ryuichi stayed awake to ensure that his lover slept all through the night. In the morning, they both had to go to work, of which he undoubtedly regretted. So, he called in for the both himself and his young partner. Touma understood, and let them stay home.

The pink-haired boy slept through most of the day, and when he finally woke up, Touma, Mika, and Hiroshi were there with him and the other male. That's when he cried the most. Which, in turn, made the others tear up as well.

The funeral of his ex-lover would be in a few days, and oddly enough, he planned on going, as did the others. Tasuha, Ryuichi's ex-lover, would be there as well. It was a day that everyone regretted.

The others left from the couple's apartment late that night, after Shuichi had fallen asleep again. Hiro was the last to leave; making sure that Shuichi was resting well. Ryuichi sighed as everyone left, sitting down next to his other-half. He watched him peacefully sleep, before he finally allowed his tears to fall.

The elder singer was trying his best to stay strong for the younger male, but doing that was hard; he didn't want the boy to see him cry.

"Ryuichi…" The boy's soft, weak voice spoke out.

"Ah, S…Shuichi." Quickly, he wiped the tears from his face. "You're supposed to be resting…"

"…I couldn't sleep…" He sighed, and curled up close to the other. "…You don't have to hide it, you know…being sad…"

"…I know…" He wrapped his arms around the boy, and pulled him to lay back down on the bed with him. The pink-haired one cried again, into the elder's shoulder, Thus, making the brunette finally release his tears into the boy's hair.

"N…no need to hide it…"

"I won't hide in anymore, Shuichi…" Ryu sighed deeply, trying to stop the flow of tears.

"Yoroshii…" He closed his eyes, nuzzling close to the other.

"Hai…" He too closed his eyes, returning the nuzzling.

The couple slept close together for the rest of the day, not even bothering to get up and answer the phone or the door. A melancholic-state took over the bother of them for what seemed like forever.

Eiri's funeral came around a few days later, and they went to the morbid scene. Black, everywhere…everywhere except the bright flowers that bedecked the coffin. Eiri's father was there, looking worse that ever; it seemed it would soon be his time too. No one said a word to anyone throughout the whole day…

Shuichi, who had run out of tears to shed at the time, placed a single red rose atop the other flowers; whispering a small "I'm sorry…", before breaking down once again. He and his elder lover watched the coffin lower into the ground; the tombstone was finally revealed…

"Eiri Uesugi

February 23, 1977 – July 15, 2001

I hope to Heaven

his soul is gone."