Chapter Three

Chap 3

To say that the lines at Macy's were hellacious was an understatement. Dawn's sweater that Giles and bought for her was too small, according to Buffy, and so she insisted they go exchange it.

Xander went along as moral support, in case Buffy or Dawn wanted to kill the cashier.

Buffy stood in the long line, and rubbed her temples.

"You okay Buff?" Xander asked as they moved forward a few steps.

"Yeah, I think so." Buffy said as she put her hand down. "I'm just not feeling right today is all."

"Yeah, Willow told me," Xander said putting a hand on Buffy's shoulder.

" WILLOW TOLD YOU!" Buffy yelled as the other waiting customers, turned to face her.

"Sorry," she told them, with a nervous wave. When they turned back around, Buffy said lower. "You mean Willow told you?"

"Yeah," said Xander as he watched color drain from her face, "She you had a really bad dream Christmas Eve."

"Oh," Buffy said a little relived that Willow had told Xander what she had told her to tell everyone. "Yeah, the bad dream I had."
"Wait a minute," Xander said, folding his arms. "There's more to it than just a bad dream."
"No there's not," Buffy tried to lie. "I don't understand what you're trying to say."
"He's saying that you had a dream about Angel."
Buffy spun around to face her younger sister. Dawn was awkwardly trying to fold her arms, but the bag that held the sweater she was about exchange, made it difficult. So, instead, Dawn placed a hand on her hip, and glared at Buffy.

Buffy knew she wasn't going to get of this situation easily, but she had to try.

"Why do you say that Dawn?" Buffy said, trying to act as if she did not understand.

" Because, you always get emotional at Christmas."
Buffy felt puzzled now.

"Sunnydale? Angel? He almost tried to commit suicide by sunrise, remember?"
Dawn gestured at Buffy as she remembered that hilltop conversation.

It had been so long, and they both been through so much more since then, that Buffy had truly all but forgotten it.

"Oh, I'm sorry you guys." Buffy said as she silently thanked whatever divine power had just saved her ass. "I guess it's so ingrained in me that forget I get broody around the holidays.

"Yeah," Xander scoffed. "And don't forget Thanksgiving either."

Buffy looked at her feet before looking back at her friends saying, "Can you guys forgive me if I turn into the Grinch again?"

Dawn placed a hand on her chin pretending to think, and Xander grabbed Buffy and embraced her.

"Yeah, I guess we can forgive her, right Dawn?"
Dawn smiled and joined the hug saying, "Yeah, we can forgive her."
"Uh, guys, I can't breathe."

Quickly, Xander and Dawn released Buffy and she straightened her green, silk blouse.

"So when are you and Brian going to have kids?" Dawn said, changing subjects.

"What?" Buffy raised an eyebrow at her sister. "Why do you want to know?"
"Cause she's itching to be an aunt," Xander grinned as he jabbed Dawn's shoulder.
"Yeah, but you want to be an uncle just as bad, Xander." Dawn said as they started a wrestling match in the store.
"Okay you guys," Buffy said, putting her hands between the two, "That's enough. Brian and I will have kids. When we are ready. And not a moment sooner."

Buffy was grateful when the cashier at the Customer service counter said, "Next!"

"Thank you," Buffy whispered to herself as she stepped up the Service desk.

After a few moments of finagling, Buffy was able to get them to let her exchange the sweater and she, Dawn and Xander, headed to the clothing department, to pick out a sweater that fit properly.

Dawn wondered the isles, looking for just the right one. When she thought she found one, she would show Buffy would in turn show one that was a lot more "covered up", as Buffy said.

Xander had wondered over to the electronics to scope out the latest video games, leaving Buffy and Dawn to walk further than Buffy had really intended.

As they passed the Infants' isle, Buffy's attention focused in on a wooden cradle that was on display.

"Go on to Electronics," Buffy said waving Dawn away, "I'll be there in a minute."

Dawn nodded, as she walked off.

Buffy walked over to the cradle and carefully brushed her hand against the fine grained pine wood. She traced the outline of the cradle, and dreamed of a day when she would have a child of her own.

I can't wait to tell An- Buffy stopped abruptly, as she realized that she was thinking of the wrong man. Oh Buffy, how stupid could you get! Buffy took her hand from the cradle and ran it through her hair. Angel's gone. Just forget about him! He's not coming back. Buffy sighed and shook her head as she turned and walked out of the Infant's section heading back to Electronics.

Buffy began to rub her head and chastise herself for still having thoughts for Angel.

She was still staring at the ground when a pair of black shoes walked past her and that old familiar tingle went through her spine.

Snapping her head back, she turned around behind her, and saw no one behind her. No one, except a tall man in a leather coat, walking Angel's familiar walk.

All sane thoughts leaving her body, Buffy raced down the main isle, hoping to catch up to Angel.

Running with all that her slayer strength could give her, Buffy hurriedly approached Angel.

When he rounded a corner, Buffy ran harder.

As she turned the corner, she saw Angel standing at the jewelry counter, staring at watches.

"Angel!" Buffy cried as she met up with him.

Angel turned around, and Buffy's heart caught in her throat.

"I'm sorry," he said as Buffy continued to stare.

"No I'm sorry," she said as she turned away, "I thought you were someone else."

"That's alright," said the man who was not Angel.

It wasn't him. It was someone who looked like him, walked like him, but obviously did not talk like him. Angel's voice was much deeper than that man's had been.

Buffy felt so embarrassed and let down, she could feel the tears trying to come.

Embarrassed because she had chased down some total stranger and blurted out Angel's name without even making sure it was him. And she was also embarrassed because she was supposed to still love her husband. And the fact that she felt she no longer did, made her feel like she had let him down.

Brian was too good a man to have to put up with Buffy's emotional baggage. And yet, he was, and still loving her in spite of it. But did she?

When Buffy entered the Electronics department, Xander and Dawn were waiting for her with bags in hand.

Shaking off the pain, Buffy went into "cheerful mode" as she walked up to them.

"You guys ready go?" she said, faking a smile.

"Yep," Dawn and Xander said together, as Buffy turned them towards the front doors.

As Xander turned down a street towards home, Buffy sat up from the backseat and asked," Hey Xand, can you drop me off at Brain's office? I have something I need to ask him."
"Yeah," Xander said turning down the street that would take them to Brian's office, "Do you want us to wait for you?"
"No, thanks though," Buffy said as Xander pulled up in front the office building. "I'll just wait until Brian leaves or I'll walk home."
"Thirty blocks?"
Dawn questioned aloud as Buffy got out the car.

"I'll see you guys back at the house, ok?"

"Ok."

"Ok, Buff. Willow 's supposed to be making meatloaf, so don't stay too long."
Buffy smiled and waved at her friends as they drove off.

When Buffy was out of sight, Dawn looked to Xander and said, "You do realize he's back in town?"
Xander gripped the steering wheel harder as he tried to say calmly, "Yep. He's back in town."
"So if he's back in town, then the world must be getting ready to end. That's the only reason he would contact Buffy." Dawn rationalized as Xander continued to focus on avoiding hitting any cars.
"If Dead-Boy's back, then yeah, it's Apocalypse Now, time."

"Great," Dawn said as she groaned and slumped in the seat.

Buffy walked through the glass doors of Brian's office building and headed for the stairs.

With every step she took, Buffy mentally tried to figure out what she was getting ready to do. Do I ask for a divorce? Do I tell him about who Angel REALLY is? Or do I just keep my big mouth shut and do nothing.

Buffy was still contemplating her actions when she reached the door to Brian's floor.

Entering Brian's floor, she saw several small offices with glass etched doors. Walking down the hall, Buffy stopped at Brian's and read the name on the glass.

Brian Kelly, Architect.

Buffy traced her hands over the etching before opening the door and walking inside.

Inside the doors, there was a small waiting area with chairs and a table laden with magazines and children's books.

Directly in front Buffy, sat a plump looking woman sitting at a contemporary looking desk.

"Afternoon Mrs. Kelly," said the woman as Buffy approached.
"Hello, Edith," Buffy said as she approached, staring at her husband through the window that was Brian's office.

"Would you like me to page Mr. Kelly for you?" Edith said as Buffy continued to watch as Brian continued working. He was sitting at his drawing board, probably going over the plans for the new Sunnydale City Hall that the newly elected Mayor had assigned to him.

Buffy watched as her husband leaned over the desk, so into his work, that he did not even notice her.

He loves his job so much, Buffy thought as she continued to stand and watch from the window. I wonder if he will ever make me as happy as I had once hoped.

Buffy blinked her eyes, and exited her depressing daydream, and turned to walk out of the office. "Do you want me to tell Mr. Kelly you stopped by?" Edith called out.

"No, don't bother him," Buffy said she turned to look at Edith. "If he does ask, tell him I wanted to make he would be home dinner?"
"I sure will, Mrs. Kelly," Edith beamed as Buffy sadly walked out the office.

End Chapter Three

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