Hello, lovelies!
All right, so I am uncharacteristically late two times in a row now, but... I have a good reason, I promise!
The story was supposed to end with chapter three. I swear I had no intentions of writing anything more, but... it kind of just happened :).
Seeing that quite a lot of you have asked, in various ways, "what the hell was Edward thinking, leaving like that?", I decided to add two more chapters before posting the last one.
So huge thanks to you, because your reviews added plenty of fire to my creative fuel!
And huge thanks to CoppertopJ, not only because she suggested adding these two chapters long before the story was posted anywhere, but also because she helped me with her edits, as always.
So, without further ado, let's find out what in the world went through Edward's mind all throughout making that tape with Bella, when he decided that leaving was the best option ;).
*Edward's Point of View*
Bella's living room had never been a place of interest to me. When it was just me and her inside the house, we gravitated towards the warm comfort of her kitchen, where we could spend hours upon hours talking and laughing and fighting back sleep just to hear another story. The living room was reserved for double dates and other things that I couldn't care less about.
But not tonight.
With my clothes stacked in a pile on the floor, I tried my best to understand how in the world I was supposed to act normal when each new minute brought me closer and closer to living out my most troublesome, most intense fantasy. A part of me knew there was a certain rhyme and reason to what was going to happen, yet revenge was hardly the thing that kept me hard as a rock right now.
The sting of betrayal was barely in the background of my thoughts. Perhaps whatever feelings I had ever mustered for Tanya had been even more, surface-level than I expected — just a way to keep my mind busy throughout the day, enough to divert myself from thinking of Bella as anything other than a friend. Of course, at night, it all came back to me, again and again. Wanting Bella, pining for her, wishing she was mine, if only for an hour. Then in the morning, long after these thoughts had melted into rivers of scorching dreams, I comforted myself with the idea that I had enough decency in my bones to remain loyal: to Tanya, but to Bella as well, because I could not possibly comprehend a world in which she wasn't my rock and I wasn't her certainty.
I played with the controls on the camera, hoping that this dull activity would somehow numb my senses for a while.
All in vain, of course.
I knew I was supposed to feel some type of guilt, seeing that Bella was more than ready to properly carry out our reprisal plan, while all I could think about was how to prolong the act of loving her before it even began. There were so many things I wanted to try, I could not possibly imagine how a few minutes were going to be enough to gorge my lust. More than anything, I wanted to know what she liked, what got her mad with desire, what made her scream — all things that needed at least a long night of fucking to even begin to understand.
In my fantasies, I kept my head buried between her thighs, devouring her pussy for the longest time before I caved and fucked her with no restraints, giving her my all as she asked for more. The possibility of doing precisely that was dangerously alluring, and I wanted it to happen. I wanted to drain orgasm after orgasm out of Bella until there was nothing left but the sweet mist of gratification hanging in the air.
The more I thought about it, the stronger my resolve got. I was going to do everything right, if only for the fact that I had precisely one chance. And I was determined to discover what it was going to get for Bella to change her mind and allow herself to chase whatever pleasures awaited all the way to where they met their end.
The sound of the bathroom door opening brought me back to earth, momentarily kidnapping my reveries.
I had not realized how much time had passed, but I could see that my erection had not let up one bit. Hearing Bella's footsteps, I prayed that she wouldn't step down in horror once she would see that my body was more than ready for her, even if we hadn't even started. For a brief moment, I wondered if I should have kept my clothes on, to have some semblance of moderation to hide my enthusiasm, but the instant Bella stepped into the living room, I realized there was no point.
She was completely naked, not a single piece of fabric getting in the way.
I didn't know where to look first. The perfection of her body felt like a sensory overload. Impossibly, the sight was even better than what I imagined, almost as if some ribald god had designed her to look specifically like every single dream I had ever had. Her breasts were a delicate piece of art, getting my full attention. I instantly decided I loved the contrast between their enticing, pale fullness, and the delicate, rosy flawlessness of the nipples adorning them. They looked as if they could fill my palms to the brim.
My gaze shifted lower, discovering the soft curves of Bella's waist, the taut canvas of her abdomen, then — so help me God — what might as well have been the gate to paradise. With her standing up, I couldn't see everything, but I could see the slightest hint of her small lips, peeking from between her legs. And I wasn't sure whether my imagination was playing tricks on me or not, but I could swear her thighs glistened.
I could have spent hours just admiring her, but I knew we had more pressing issues that needed to be dealt with. With effort, I moved my eyes to her face. She was as beautiful as always, a pronounced blush tinting her cheeks. However, she wasn't looking at me, but rather at the obvious bulge in my boxers.
"Welcome back," I said, hoping she wouldn't notice the strained desire hiding under the very surface of my voice. Her eyes flew up, away from my erection, and she blushed some more. I didn't know what to tell her, in order to get her to feel more comfortable, but I didn't want to risk an awkward silence either, so in my sudden stupor, I went with the truth. "Hmmm, you know, I have to be honest with you. Even with the risk of sounding crass… you look fucking incredible without your clothes on, Bella."
"Thank you. You don't look so bad yourself."
Our eyes met and I couldn't help but smile, seeing that she appeared to be quite hot and bothered. We never shied away from paying each other compliments, but this time it was different. This time the compliments were far from being the innocent accolades we were used to.
Finally realizing that playing with the camera did nothing to quench my excitement, I placed the device on the desk in front of me, shifted until I was no longer lying down, and motioned Bella to sit down by my side. I didn't know where the sudden rush of confidence in my chest came from, but I decided to take full advantage of it.
She found a spot by my side, and I felt my hunger for her stir, now that she was closer. It was difficult, if not downright impossible, not to stare at the stiff peaks of her nipples, poking through the curtain of hair covering Bella's breasts. They demanded attention, and I was more than willing to give it to them.
"I'm not sure where to start," I heard her say. Her confession was a little unexpected, considering how not that long ago she was boldly explaining her wild plan to me. She seemed a little less reckless now, and a part of me feared that she might have changed her mind in the bathroom.
Trying to test the waters, I found something to hold on to. "We don't have to start right away."
"What do you mean?" She frowned, as if my words had insulted her.
"What I mean is I'm not a caveman. I'd like this to be pleasurable, not just a chore. We can explore each other a little bit, to see what works, before we start anything else. We do want to seem believable, right?"
It took her a second to process my words. When she talked, her voice trembled. "Right. And… we should probably set up some ground rules."
"Anything you want," I assured her.
"No kissing," she said, and something inside me broke. Truthfully, I had not expected kissing to be a part of the deal, but hearing her deny the possibility altogether sent painful shivers down my back.
Still, I had a part to play. "That's a given. We're not together."
"Glad we're on the same page." She looked as if she hadn't seen right through my lie. "Also, it's probably for the best to not utter each other's names while we're filming, in case… you know…"
I nodded, quickly making a mental note and hoping to be able to hold my end of the bargain. "Agreed, we don't want to leave any breadcrumbs behind. Anything else?"
"Well, I kind of mentioned it already, but… we really don't have to go all the way to the finishing point. If we can get a few minutes of us on camera, it'd probably be enough to get the message across. Besides, I still want to be friends after all of this, I don't… I don't want to ruin it by going all the way."
It was fruitless to argue, but I still tried. "Aren't we about to go all the way anyway?"
"Well, yes, but with a purpose. What I meant was… all the way to the end. That's probably a line we shouldn't cross."
In spite of the cold shiver digging its way through me along with her words, I smiled — because she was so very right, yet my body was far from being ready to come to terms with the idea of having sex with no actual release in sight. The ridiculousness of my state would have been frustrating if I could actually concentrate on its meaning; instead, I was too caught up in observing the particularly exquisite shape of Bella's lips when she talked.
"As you wish," I muttered my response, not yet ready to look away. "Anything else?"
"Anything else… is fair game."
I noticed the way she bit her lip right before our eyes met again, and my skin felt positively hot with the knowledge that this was happening. We were going to do this, all reason be damned. My arms opened, eager to surround her, to feel the supreme blessing of her bare skin on mine.
"Now, why don't you come over here?" I suggested, but she was already moving. The air moved with her, bringing her ravishing fragrance closer, then all of a sudden I felt her thighs straddling mine, her featherweight pressing on my lap. I barely suppressed a growl, seeing that we were close in a way we had never been before. So close, I could swear the erratic dance of her pulsing veins was visible.
My eyes had never moved away from her face. It would have been so easy to kiss her now. With her lips parted, and irregular breaths rolling down their pink slopes, it was simple to imagine the feeling.
So soft, so memorable…
The need to reach out and crush my mouth against hers grew with rabid intensity, once Bella's arms surrounded my shoulders. In an effort to stop myself from doing something regrettable, I talked again, circling her waist with my arms. "How are you feeling?"
"Safe." Her response was immediate and it made my erection harden. "You?"
"Quite turned on, actually," I confessed.
I didn't expect a response, so her next words rendered me speechless. "I am too."
The sudden knot in my chest had nothing to do with nervousness and everything to do with the ever-rising tension between our bodies. It pulsated, forming an invisible string of electricity that tied my every atom to her.
No longer willing to suppress myself, I chose to go with the truth. "I want to touch you."
She nodded, adorably flustered, and I tried to take my time, not wanting to rush anything. It was the sweetest torture to leave her waist alone, to ascend along her delicate ribcage, feeling every level of oscillation. I loitered for a while, once I found the very place under which her heart vibrated. The beat was so rapid, as if a little Colibri bird was hiding there, trying to escape. But somewhere between observing the fluttering in Bella's chest and trying to satisfy my curiosity, my hands moved.
It wasn't until my hands grabbed her breasts that I realized what I was actually doing.
With the illicit plumpness now in my palms, my first instinct was to squeeze, and I surrendered to it without a fight. As the flesh gave in under my grasp, new pangs of hunger emerged from the darkest pits of my conscience. I wanted to lick it and bite it, to sink my teeth into all that softness.
When Bella arched her back, effectively bringing herself even closer, my cock twitched with need.
Reminding myself of my mission to not hurry, I eased my grasp on her breasts, and chose instead to focus on her nipples. At first, I merely tested the waters — tracing circles around them with my fingertips, watching them get engorged with blood, trying to understand if she was enjoying herself at least half as much as I was.
While I was pondering this, my hands made decisions without my brain. Without warning, they were no longer caressing, they were pinching the two perfect little beads. When Bella moaned — a long, sensuous sound — it became obvious that I wasn't alone in finding pleasure in this act. I looked at her, mesmerized to find her looking back through heavy eyelids.
Hazily, I noticed that she was touching me too, her fingers leaving wild conflagrations behind as they moved chaotically on my arms and chest. Almost as if she craved the closeness as much as I did.
I could no longer take the double agony of touching her and being touched by her. It was too good and entirely too much.
Despaired, I reached out and sealed my mouth around her left nipple. My left hand fell back on her waist, eager to hold on to something while my mouth and tongue found a new purpose. I couldn't tell what I loved more: the captivating texture on my tongue, the combined song of our ragged breaths, or the fact that Bella had never stopped her sensual attack on me, her hands now fighting with my hair in surprisingly enjoyable ways.
"You're enjoying this," I inferred, using the small pause as an opportunity to move to her right nipple, sensing it was getting impatient to be pleased by something other than my fingers.
"You bet I am."
"Good." Governed by instincts yet again, I used one hand to grab her ass, pleased to discover how divinely corpulent it felt, and pushed her hips forward. A sudden, wet pressure seeped through my boxers, making me realize several things at once. She was most likely wet. And if it weren't for my boxers getting in the way, I could have felt the slick folds of her pussy sliding along my cock without barriers. Bella remained there, soaking my underwear with her excitement, and it was sheer pain to not fuck her right now. My voice was mostly a groan when I talked again. "I am too."
To relieve some of the tension I felt, I ground my hips, back and forth, making sure to never stop revering her breasts and buttocks as I did so. I repeated the motion, and felt her body tremble and tense up. Looking up for a brief second, I noticed her teeth piercing through her bottom lip, clearly suppressing a sound I would have loved.
"No, don't do that," I murmured, starving to hear her. "Don't hold back now. Let it out."
Aiming to encourage her, I resumed my ravishing of her nipples and pushed my hips upwards, pressing my erection between her legs once more. It was enough. She moaned again — a sound so raw, so uncalculated, it almost made me lose my mind with desire — and her hands were suddenly no longer in my hair, but fighting with the elastic band of my boxers. I hurried to help her, displeased to part from her breasts to get the task done.
Naked at long last, I was ready to get back to what I was doing seconds ago, but her raised index finger alerted me that I had to wait.
I stopped, barely holding myself together, wishing more than anything to keep going. But she was clearly in a different state of mind, as her eyes traveled down my chest and stopped their journey lower. Much lower, directly on my stiff cock. I was long past feeling any shade of mortification over the fact that Bella — my sweet friend Bella — was staring at my naked form. She could stare all day long if she so pleased.
However, her growing silence was getting unnerving, because it could mean anything — maybe she regretted ever starting this game, maybe she wanted to postpone this, or maybe she had changed her mind at the last minute and she was now thinking of ways to politely get me to leave.
If I could pay to read her mind right now, I would have.
"Is everything all right?" I asked, in a bid to break the quietness.
She hesitated. "I… am… not sure it is."
My heart sank, and I struggled not to let it show. "We can stop, if it's—"
"No," she interrupted me, setting my heart back in place. "No, it's not that… it's…" So lost in her eyes, trying to decipher their secrets, I had not realized her hand had found a new mission until her fingertips landed on my member. I inhaled sharply, holding back a groan. She didn't need to know I was that desperate to feel her touch. "Your size might be a little too much for me."
Fucking hell.
Out of all the things getting in the way, I had never even considered this. In my mind, we had to be compatible. We were compatible in everything else, why not in this regard as well? But seeing how her small hand trembled when she grabbed my cock, it started to dawn on me that I had not thought things through properly.
Unwanted memories of how my first night with Tanya left her in pain sprung up. Sure, it was different then, since that had been my first attempt at sex, and things got better after that, but I still should have known better.
History couldn't repeat itself. Not with Bella. I had to give her my all.
"Bella…" I didn't know what exactly I was trying to say, but it didn't matter anyway, once her palm rubbed downwards along my length, all the way to my balls. I wanted her to repeat the motion, but more than this, I wanted her mind to be at rest. "I'll get you good and ready, I promise. Come here." In an effort to clear my head, I grabbed her wrists and moved us, until she had her back on the couch and I was on top of her. "I said I wanted this to be pleasurable and I meant it. We'll start slowly."
Never looking away from her face, I let one of her wrists go and started exploring her again, mapping out every single detail, concentrating on her breasts. Soon enough, she was back to irregular breaths and panting. By the time I reached her hip bone, my breath was out of control. I couldn't quite believe what I was about to do. If it weren't for the tight grip of her thighs around my hips, or for how her pulse echoed in my palm as I kept her wrist prisoner, I would have been convinced it was all a dream.
Carefully, to preserve the sanctity of the moment, I dragged my fingers lower, and lower, until, at long last, they met the blazing heat of her cunt. I paused when I heard her long sigh, only to keep going when she nodded at me, realizing how much I underestimated her before. She wasn't just wet. It was an actual flood between her legs, overtaking everything in its glorious wake. My fingers swimmed around, observing the way her small lips unfurled outwards, moving the heavenly sap around, exploring this sacred place in awe.
"Fuck…" I was half stuck in a state of wonder, half burning to do more. "I didn't know you'd be so damn wet."
"Is it… too much?"
Was she clinically insane? In what world would that have been a problem? I shook my head, incredulously. "Are you kidding me? It's all I want."
I watched the way her face changed when my previously aimless fingers found a place to focus on. Her clitoris was small and hard as a pearl, but it was safely hidden underneath its hood. Not wanting to push things too far, too soon, I drew circles around it, to see how she liked it.
Her reaction was almost instant. She cried out, and suddenly her hands were in my hair again.
"Do you like it?" I checked, although I was willing to bet I knew the answer.
"Yes, yes, keep going like that!"
Not willing to disappoint her, I did exactly as she pleased. I couldn't get used to how slippery everything was, or with the fact that, all things considered, I was the cause behind this little miracle. Reality was decidedly better than my fantasies, and I didn't know how to process it. Even more than that, how was I supposed to only do this once?
As I remained faithful to my mission of pleasing her, Bella clung to me with avidity, raising her hips and pulling my hair, her reactions getting wilder and wilder. I wondered if this was an usual thing for her, or if it was a sign of her impending undoing. As much as I wanted the second option to be true, it didn't seem possible. After all, a mere minute must have passed since I started teasing her pussy, an orgasm couldn't be on the line for her already.
Nevertheless, the possibility intrigued me to no end, so I picked up my pace ever so slightly, to see how she would react, only for Bella to push her hips back on the couch, interrupting my pace. I stopped, but also didn't. My hand was still resting between her silken folds, only this time it remained still.
"Too close," she whispered, confirming my previous theory and getting my ego to rear its head. When I felt her hand reaching between us and grabbing my cock again, I very nearly lost it. She began a rubbing motion that quickly got me to understand how easy it would be for me to find my release at her mercy. I let her do what she wanted for a while, sensing she was getting more confident with her motions, but had to stop her eventually, once the tension inside my balls threatened to meet its end — not that I would have minded; but knowing her rules, she might have.
"Not yet," I groaned, moving her hand away. Slowly finding my way back to being far enough from the edge to not fall, I parted her drenched lips with my fingers, spreading her pussy in anticipation. God, how I yearned to fill her up. "I want to be inside you. So, so much…"
She moaned in response, and it was what I wanted to hear. Knowing that I had to warm her up first, I slid one finger inside, going in as far as her body allowed. I was welcomed by tight, hot walls that clenched so tightly around me I thought they wanted to keep me prisoner there. Greedy for more, I added a second finger, forcing her pussy to open up and accept it. Her liquid arousal overflowed, trickling on my knuckles in small streams.
"Goddamn, Bella… your cunt is so fucking tight." The words left my mouth without a filter, but I wasn't about to back down. I wanted her to be aware of what she was doing to me. She was a complete mess, squirming and letting out whimpers of pleasure as my fingers worked her pussy. "So tight and greedy, it's dripping all over my fingers." Way past the point of no return, I started grazing her entrance with a third finger. "Can you handle more?"
"I need more."
Without hesitation, I pushed that third finger further, getting past the soft resistance and deep inside her flooding depths. Bella let out a loud cry at the intrusion, the sound getting more pronounced when I started fucking her slowly. I moved my fingers back and forth inside her, to get her muscles used to the idea of being filled like this, marveling at the way her pussy gushed with arousal, dousing my palm. Unsurprisingly, thoughts of Bella letting go completely started to nag me, trying to get me to drop all rules. I didn't know how to chase them away, too caught up in how tempting they all were.
So I fell prey to them.
"Play with your clit," I told her, mindful of where I wanted to go.
I didn't have to say anything more to convince her. She listened to my command, and next thing I knew, she was stroking her pleasure point, while I kept pumping in and out, hard and steady, again and again.
"Oh, fuck…" she exhaled loudly, with her eyes now closed, and I suspected that she was on a certain path to finding relief.
Her cunt tightened around my fingers, and her legs started to thrash around me, as if she was a woman possessed. Recklessly, we didn't stop. Our fingers worked together in divine harmony — mine to fuck and curl against the sensitive spot inside her, hers to rapidly massage her clit.
I had one purpose, and one purpose only, regardless of the stakes.
When her eyes flew open, meeting mine, I felt weaker than ever. She was a different kind of beautiful now, with her irises glazed by a sheen of lust, her cheeks flushed, her lips parted and thirsty for air. The sight made me ache for everything I never had with her, everything I wanted to have with her. No fantasy was more wicked, no daydream more threatening to our friendship.
Now, perhaps more than ever.
My heart was on the line here, and she didn't even know it.
"Edward, wait!"
Her call broke through my haze, alerting me that while I was selfishly busy with my own worries, something else had happened. I stopped altogether, fearing the worst. "Am I hurting you?"
"No, you're incredible." She lifted herself on her elbows. "Let's… let's start filming, all right?"
I didn't react right away, I couldn't. It was as if I had almost forgotten why we were even doing this. Going through the motions, I managed to withdraw my fingers and pull back, my cock throbbing when I saw the used state of her pussy. The pink folds were swollen and covered in juices, and I wanted nothing more than to let my tongue be engulfed by that piece of heaven.
Still staring at her, I found the will to respond. "Fine. I'll handle it."
I grabbed the camera on the table by the couch, and turned it on, removing the body cap covering the lens before angling it towards Bella. As soon as I did so, the small screen revealed the most carnal sight. The pixels formed the perfect picture of a naked, impossibly gorgeous Bella, whose fingers were lazily grazing her glistening cunt. The image seared itself in my brain, ready to remain there until the end of time.
As I admired the languorous show, a new possibility started forming in my head.
"I have an idea," I announced.
"What idea?"
"Keep playing with your pussy and follow my lead."
She went on, and it was the hardest thing to keep myself in check when she was actively pleasuring herself in front of me. She was doing it with such ease, not a trace of reticence in the way she worked herself. She had no qualms about revealing this side of herself in front of me, and I knew she was more than ready for what came next.
We kept our eyes on each other as I started the camera. Quietly reassuring each other that we wanted to go through with this.
"You just can't get enough, can you?" It wasn't really a question, more of an observation on my part, considering the sheer insatiable hunger in her eyes. Glancing down, my mouth watered upon seeing how she was dripping on the couch, imagining the taste. With my free hand, I reached down, to caress her. "Look at this." Forgetting all about gentleness, I plunged two fingers inside, swirling them around, forcing more of her juices to spill out. Mesmerized, I pushed deeper and figured I might as well say everything else that was on my mind. If not now, when? "You made a mess with this wet cunt of yours. I might just have to lick it all off once I'm done fucking you."
"I'd still want more," she panted, and I couldn't tell if she was playing a role for the camera or not.
I quickly decided it didn't matter. "If you could take more," I said and, wanting to take things a step further, I rammed two more fingers inside. She yelped, completely helpless, welcoming me with enthusiastic little squeezes. The fact that she had stopped rubbing her clitoris didn't escape me.
"I can't stand it anymore." Bella was basically whimpering at this point, fueled by something that transcended our play pretend act. "Fuck me, please!"
I smiled, almost in disbelief over what I was hearing, but also aware that she was far from being a good actress, which meant that her despair was more than likely real.
"Beg and I'll think about it."
My fingers curled inside her, and she made no effort to conceal her vocal delight. "Please, fuck me already!" I went back to doing precisely that, moving at an accelerating pace. "You've teased me enough."
Surely, she was right. But I was starting to enjoy this. Prolonging the inevitable was almost bittersweet, since it was doomed to end before it began.
"I'm not convinced," I pushed my luck.
Her eyes widened, and I wished to have captured their shock on camera as well. Instead, I kept the camera right between her legs, where the result of our war of wills translated beautifully.
"I need you to fuck me," Bella sobbed. "I need your cock deep, please, please…"
Her voice dripped with need, and I didn't know how to deny her demands anymore, nor how I managed to do it until now. My fingers exited her body slowly, and I couldn't help but stare at the thick, clear juices coating them — a direct result of her arousal, that looked far more appetizing than it should have. For a moment, I considered licking everything off, to satisfy this particular thirst. But somehow, I feared that doing what I wanted would have meant going over the limits we agreed upon.
Frustrated, I descended back to reality. A quick calculation made me understand that if I remained on top, the only thing I would have been able to film was her face — not that I minded, but I knew it went against our mutual purpose. Luckily, I had another option, almost as exciting as the one that allowed me to see her eyes. "Turn around, I want to see your ass when I fuck you."
I parted from her, to give her some liberty to move. Bella turned around on her belly, the couch hardly offering her enough space to be quicker, and I instantly saw the opportunity within her new position. How many times had I admired the undulating curves of her bottom from afar? I couldn't remember, but I knew that not only once did they awaken a yearning to manhandle them. Decision made, I smacked her ass, hard enough for her skin to redden and for her to wail.
"On your knees," I instructed, and she did as told. Now that her ass was in the air, Bella offered a goddamn show to the camera without even trying. "Good girl."
I struggled to believe that my unorthodox dreams were really on a path to coming true. For this reason alone, I didn't want this moment to ever end. The anticipation was killing me — and her, seeing that she was so eagerly pushing her hips backwards, silently urging me to continue — but it was also a reminder that the end was inescapable.
I would have lingered for longer, but when the tip of my erection found her slippery slit, I lost it.
Keeping one hand on her waist, the other on the camera, I found my way inside her. I only managed to get the tip inside, but the sensation was so divine we moaned together. She felt impossibly tight, her pussy effectively strangling my cock. I kept going further, submerging myself in Bella's hot depths slowly, to allow her plenty of time to accommodate my size. Her inner walls stretched and stretched, making room for me, until I had no more space to go and my balls rested at her entrance, getting soaked in her arousal.
She groaned at the intrusion, and I fought to keep my thoughts on a coherent path. "Fuck, you're so tight, I love it…"
I remained there for a while, not only to make sure there was no discomfort for her, but also to process our union in peace. It was the single best sensation I had ever been given the chance to feel. It was as if I had wandered a lifetime to find a home and I was only now finding it. Inside Bella, the usual worries of the day had no place, nor sense. There was only pleasure and the sweet dream of relief.
Never in my life had I been more tranquil.
And never in my life had I wanted an orgasm more.
I retreated just a little, and the loving embrace of her cunt dissipated my peace and caused my passion to return in full measure. I didn't have to think about my next move, it was all instinct from this point on. I started moving back and forth, no longer capable of delicacy. All I wanted was to fuck, to possess, to own, to live this moment on an endless loop. Fear made its way inside me as I went on, reminding me that it was all temporary.
That the happiest moment in my life was on the brink of shattering.
The realization only got me to pound faster, like an animal in heat, simultaneously getting closer to the finish line and not wanting my bliss to end.
Then, in between groans, Bella managed to utter actual words. "Harder… harder!"
I could only oblige in front of such an irresistible plea. My cock was pistoning in and out of her so fast, chasing one thing and one thing only, that I could hardly keep up with what was happening. The camera shook in my hands, announcing in its own way that it wouldn't be long until I exploded completely.
Desperate, I wrestled my way back to reason, trying to find a good enough reason to stop.
I closed my eyes, trying to remember what I risked missing if I continued. I saw all the little moments she and I had shared over the years. All the times we laughed until it hurt. All the times we fell asleep as we texted each other. All the encouraging embraces. All the inside jokes.
All the love we had for one another, again and again and again.
It was the hardest thing to put an end to what I was doing, and it hurt me to my core, but by some miracle, I managed to. I stopped filming altogether, placing the camera back on the table, not yet leaving her body; I was simply relishing in the last remnants of my sorrowful euphoria, before I went back to the world I knew.
"I stopped filming," I told her, while I tried to get my breath back to a regular pace. "We've got a few good minutes of footage."
But she didn't say anything. All I could hear were delicate sobs and desperate breaths from her.
It was the only thing that could have brought me back to my better judgement.
"Bella? Have I hurt you?" I started retreating, only for her to push back, getting my cock back inside her, all the way in. I grunted, despite my efforts to remain civil, and grabbed her hips tightly, to enjoy the sensation one last time.
I was ready to let go now.
Truly.
But then she proved to me I wasn't, not even a little bit. "Fuck me."
"We're no longer filming."
"I know," she responded. "But I need this."
My grasp on her got tighter, and while I tried to understand what made Bella change her mind about the rules, I started moving inside her again. Quickly, I felt my climax looming on the horizon again, so I stopped.
"You don't understand. I'm too close."
"No," she protested. "You don't understand. I'm close too."
My head spun at her words. I wanted nothing more than for us to come together, but I was also deeply aware of what it meant. Conflicted, I grabbed the ends of her hair into my fist — something to ground me to reality.
I should have reminded her about our agreement.
I should have backed down now, while I still had the chance.
But I didn't.
I didn't recognize the force driving me, all I knew was that I couldn't resist its pull.
"You know there's no going back if we go there, right?"
"I know," she suspired.
Her body clenched around me yet again, and I groaned in response, pulling on her hair.
"And you know that if I keep fucking your perfect little cunt, I'll come in no time, right?" I persisted.
"Yes, Edward."
Hearing Bella say my name in the state that she was in did unspeakable things to me. We were no longer playing a game, that much was obvious, and I had no qualms about seeking what I wanted, now that I knew we were both on the hunt for liberation. I tried to be slow for Bella's sake, plunging my cock unhurriedly in and out of the temple of her body, but I quickly found myself unable to keep at it.
When I noticed the way she dug her nails into the fabric of the couch, I understood the need for more was mutual. Spurred on, I picked up my pace, fucking her with fervent urgency and mindful of all the ways she responded to me. When her lustful sounds grew more enthusiastic, I knew she wasn't far.
Determined to bring her over the edge, I encouraged her. "Let go, Bella… I know you're close… you can do it, yes… yes… come for me."
Her orgasm hit abruptly, and it was like a dam breaking after months of torrential rain.
Beautiful, violent, powerful.
Her pussy convulsed all over my cock, bathing my balls in a hot wave of her sap. I was taken aback by the sheer force of her climax, by what it was doing to her. She was grabbing everything she could: the armrest in front of her, the pillows, the cushion underneath. I witnessed it all in complete reverence, never ceasing to fuck her while she rode her zenith.
Then, stunning me further, she came again.
Every inch of her body trembled, as if overtaken by a thousand little earthquakes, and I had to dig my fingers in her hips to keep her steady. My rhythm quickened without notice, and I thought I had enough willpower to last more. Enough to wring out one more orgasm from her. Enough for my rapture to never end.
In the end, hearing Bella purr my name was enough to do me in.
I barely had enough time to exit her body. Precisely one second later, I was rubbing myself vigorously, watching as dense ribbons of my cum landed on her back. I cursed and grunted her name, again and again, lost in a swirling pool of emotions, with no way out. The exhilaration was otherworldly, because never in my life had I been closer to heaven than I was now. My insides, my conscience, reality itself — everything was melting around me, and I didn't really care.
I collapsed on top of Bella, with my head in her hair, ready to fall asleep and find out how oblivion tasted when I shared it with her. Nothing could be better than this.
I breathed in, breathed out, quietly realizing she smelled like us, the lavender in her fragrance overtaken by the combined scents of our bodies and orgasms.
I couldn't pinpoint the moment reality decided to knock on my door. The change was so swift, that I didn't even notice it was getting close. All I knew was that one moment I was on top of Bella, peacefully recovering after everything that transpired between us, then the next I was growing more and more aware of the camera staring at us from the table by the couch.
Its presence was almost mocking, serving to remind me that the happiest moment of my life was nothing but a game of spite. A sad, terrible joke.
At the end of the day, she and I were not together, not even close. Lingering around after having just fucked her came with a myriad of implications. A part of me was ready to face them all, but what kind of monster would I have been if I did so? I didn't want to take advantage of Bella's state, knowing that she had trusted me enough to do this without fearing a shift in our relationship. Besides, the next day, the outcome would have been the same regardless.
Friends. Always friends, never more.
No need to persecute my heart with hope.
Suddenly, it felt like the room was too small to contain us both. I got up mechanically, doing what had to be done. "Wait here, I'll bring some tissues to clean you up."
She didn't respond, nor move, so I presumed that she was most likely ready for me to leave. Minutes later, I was cleaning her up, trying to chase away my resurfacing needs. It was tough to remain immune, when my mind worked against me, torturing me with images of what I wanted. And what I wanted right now was to lick her cunt to completion, to fuck her some more, then to spend the rest of the night sleeping with her body safe in my arms.
I used her silence as a way to do the right thing. "Listen, I've got to go now, do you need anything?"
"Hm?"
I sighed, grateful that she had her head in a pillow, where she could not see how defeated I looked while I recovered my clothes from the floor and dressed myself back up. "I have to go, Bella. But call me if you need anything." No response. It was like she wanted to ignore me, "You heard me, right?" Still nothing. Come to think of it, silence was a response too. "Will you call me?"
"Yes," she said, and for whatever reason, I decided to believe her. Maybe because it was healthy to give her the benefit of the doubt — she had to be some level of tired, hence her apprehension to talk, right?
Or maybe because she needed some time to process what just happened, which was more than understandable.
Or… maybe because I didn't know what to do with myself if she didn't call me tomorrow.
Or the day after tomorrow.
Or ever again.
On my way back home, I began to wonder if I had unknowingly lost the best thing I ever had.
When she didn't call the next day, I was pretty certain I had.
Things aren't really looking up, I know, but hang on just a little longer ;).
I am so curious to know your thoughts on this chapter! I know being inside Edward's head can be a lot sometimes, but it's still my favourite place to be when I'm writing fanfics.
See you soon with one more chapter before the last one!
Until next time, stay safe and happy!