Disclaimer: I do not own Kim Possible or the Metroid franchise.
Today's subject: Super Strength.
"So what's on the agenda today hmm… let's see, visitor to sign for the… cute guest star from a game franchise for today's subject… make Ron Stoppable a mad hulking orange food hungry beast… make Shego just mad… try and drive Kim Possible insane…. start today's subject after reading lists of things to do and introduce the guest." Darkon was ignoring Ron, Kim, Sir and Shego in the background playing a card game.
"How long has he had us trapped here anyway?" Shego said trying to see if she could get Kim to think of a way out of this.
"I think a couple of days and there's not really much we can do." After showing her hand both Ron and Shego grimaced as she won again, they all handed Kim a coupon for something or other.
"Hey guess, what we're going to have another person join us for today's super powered lesson." None of them seemed to enthusiastic about it and they all just looked at Darkon with no emotions showing.
"You guy's are creepier then Sir on a day he doesn't die." They all respectively blinked and turned to Sir with questioning looks.
"So who's the poor sap you're dragging into this?" Shego had to ask, because seconds later a door open and they all turned to see who was coming in and had mixed reactions.
Kim dove behind Ron whimpering, Shego blinked a few times and Ron was looking at it hungrily.
"THE CUPCAKES ARE BACK… KEEP THEM AWAY!" Kim said trying to duck behind Ron even further.
"… What's with them it's like they've never seen a living four foot tall cupcake and have we met?" The cupcake had pink icing, triangular red sun glasses and had a weird gun shouldered he turned to Kim Possible, who frantically shook her head no.
The cupcake handed Darkon a clip board with a pen and Darkon signed something, then handed it back and the cupcake just made its way for the door.
"Hey Lice, tell your brother Ecil I'll eventually fix his ability to speak straight… Oh! and before you leave could you go to the evil cow section and make sure she knows I need her now?" Lice just waves off the comment and exits the room.
"So he's not back for revenge?" Kim said highly shaken.
"No I just happen to create a race of super cupcakes that can reproduce themselves like humans, they wouldn't want revenge unless they've seen you in a bakery." Darkon was getting really weird looks after that kind of comment.
"Evil cows, I've heard of Monkey Ninjas… but cows and evil that doesn't seem likely and all that stuff about the cupcakes just raises even more questions." Ron was busy thinking about an entire room full of evil cows and who this person Darkon was asking to come here, what were those cows like anyway they probably make the weirdest tasting cheese alive.
"You seriously don't want to know about those cows, the cupcakes are tamer in comparison to the cows locked into those tiny cells and held there with the over the top force fields for our own protection." Suddenly they all heard a rather loud chirping sound and looked around for it, but couldn't see anything and shrugged it off, Darkon seemed a little edgy.
"So what's today's power eyeball?" Shego asked as if she was bored taking out her nail file to start doing whatever she does with it.
"It's a power your all familiar with, Kim's had it once, Ron basically three times and Shego had it and was near it for a set period of time." They all took a thoughtful look on their faces trying to figure out what powers they had now.
"Hego's power? But Ron's only had super strength twice and the second time he wasn't in control of his mind at the time." Let's take a count Kim was right, it was Hego's power.
"Not true, Ron still has one of those sort of; the first is Mystical Monkey Strength, considering he can create an earthquake with it, second was with that muscle enhancer ring and third was when Ron became Project: Titan from Hench Co., the theft of your super suit doesn't count considering it's mostly the suit that does the work." Shego just looked up at Darkon and went back to filing.
"Looks that is interesting and all, but what's the point you already know how we used them considering you have our past experiences memorized… what was the Titan project anyway? I really never got around to it after that transducer thing was stolen." Shego was only slightly aware of what happened to Ron at that time considering she wasn't there after Kim left with the device, she went to relax and thought about how Kim actually did something she probably should have done from the start.
"You seriously don't want to know Shego, let's just say Ron destroyed his favorite eating place and it took them a month to rebuild." Kim was quickly trying to get of the subject of Ron turning into The Incredible Bulk, then she went off track thinking about how Ron watched wrestling and that The Incredible Bulk sounds too much like a wrestler.
"I think he might still have capability to do that again if he went on an eating binge and all that… I think I just gave people some ideas for new fan fics, in any case the guest is here, but she is kind of shy of meeting new people who she tends to think of as prey." They all stopped and looked around wide eyed at the word prey and the context it was used in was rather serious.
"SQUEE!" Before anyone could do anything a small jellyfish creature flew out of no where and latched onto Darkon's figurative back, which was as usual just bland non living darkness.
"What is that?" It was the strangest jellyfish Kim had ever seen, four claws, no tentacles and it had three nuclei in a thick membrane, it was also rubbing itself against Darkon rather interestingly.
"Sqqquuuuuueeeeeeee." The weird thing sounded as if it was purring.
"Dude is that what I think it is?" Ron said as he distinctly remembered playing a Metroid game before and backing away from it slowly.
"That thing is posed to be your guest; it doesn't look dangerous at all and our super strength would probably rip it in half." Shego continued to ignore it although it did remind her of a cat the way it can hide in a room with barely anything at all to hide behind and managed to stay out of visible sight.
"This is Primell the Metroid and I'll have you know while she's very intelligent and affectionate to me, she is incredibly dangerous to everything else and could probably suck the life out of you within twenty seconds flat and even with super strength you couldn't likely pry her off of yourself in time or stop her from stealing your life force straight from your body even with a inch thick plate of any kind of metal covering your body." Darkon was not paying attention to what he was doing and was petting Primell making her squeal into a fit of giggling chirps about being praised and defended.
"So uh yeah, why and how did you get a live Metroid, much less tame one?" Exclaimed Ron, he was in the corner far away from Primell and the claws of death.
"I thought we were supposed to be doing a subject on Super Strength right now and no I'd never tame her, she just willingly listens to me since she likes me, Ron you have Hulk syndrome the more emotional you get the stronger you physically are as well as your muscles won't slow you down no matter how big they get, Kim has compact muscle power and Shego you have Hego's normal super strength ... let me remind you that super strength usually goes to a persons head making that person bigoted and or stupid, it doesn't mean the same as invulnerability and it is rare to see anyone with just super strong legs for surviving high jumps and you only find stuff like that watching the Dragoons on Saturday at the fantasy world festival for heroes or Samus Aran." Well Darkon set the super powers out on the table now what?
"SKREET!" Flinching Darkon looked apologetically to Primell.
"Okay so you don't just like me, apparently you have the warmest love for my survival which I rarely consider since I almost always look forward to being blown up." Darkon was inwardly asking for Primell to snuggle him like no tomorrow, but it was against fan fic regulations to have weird life sucking alien jellyfish and evil eye monster love scenes.
"Darkon we really didn't do much about super strength today." Sir complained as the fic was close to ending.
"Kim you punch Sir, Shego you punch my girlfriend and Ron get incredibly emotional and punch that steel wall that has words on it you probably wouldn't like." They all blinked when Darkon said girlfriend, but went about doing what they were posed to, Shego hit Primell with enough force to layout a giant land whale and it did nothing, Ron turned into a large orange hulk and smashed a sign with lots of stuff advertising Ron doesn't like Bueno Nacho with pictures Darkon took from the fact he caved and ate that Taco Bell taco, however Kim didn't do anything and just looked at Sir.
"What's the problem Ms. Possible? I'm immortal and even though I feel pain, I wouldn't worry about hurting me." Sir said waiting for the inevitable, if Kim didn't punch him Shego probably would and the rusty spoon thing had hurt something fierce before he finally died from the pain.
"Sorry I just can't do this Darkon, I have morals and I know Shego does to though I can't believe you just let her hit your girlfriend while she had super strength." She was looking at Primell and it didn't look like Primell even felt being struck or even cared.
"That's okay, Primell is immune to physical trauma because of her gelatinous body, apparently super strength is useless under water, against gooey blobby things and in places where you have no leverage, in any case super strength has more weaknesses then most powers because it's limited to close contact meaning ranged weapons of any kind or an anti-gravity field and your useless, not to mention if whoever you fight happens to have flying powers and is flying in mid-air wouldn't be effected by a super strong punch because that person has no friction of standing on the ground." Darkon figured this was pretty much everything anyone would need to know about super strength, then Shego took over Kim's job and just punch Sir once sending him splattering all over the walls of the white cube room.
"Yeah okay, but what is the difference between compact muscle power and Shego with Hego's power?" Kim asked glaring at Shego as she enjoyed messing with Sir now who had just come back to life by breaking one of his arms off and watching it bleed green goo like a synthodrone except it was stickier and was not syntho goo, this of course attracted Primell who started leeching Sir's energy till he died again.
"To answer your question, your compact muscles make your body hard as a diamond because the compaction is like charcoal and a elephant sitting on it creating a side effect of invulnerability that Hego obviously doesn't have since he wears bullet proof cloth mesh like Shego does, I even have the specs for it yet because of my inane incompetence in being mathematically challenged I would need Sir to assist me in making some, of course I also assume the gloves you use for your mission outfit (not super suit) were probably plasma proofed unless I'm mistaken and Shego does want to be your friend, the same difference is there, except I've seen you block her plasma hands with your arms a few times as well without injury." Kim was beginning to see that Darkon was on to something, but decided not to question it and just smiled as Primell floated back to him chirped happily as its three nuclei just stopped glowing and she fell asleep on top of Darkon it seemed kind of cute in a awkweird way.
"ME HUNGRY." Ron stomped over looking around for something to eat still in his huge hulking orange form.
"Uh… RON?" Kim said looking at Ron with fear that she lost him again, Darkon silently pulled out a bazooka on an arm formed of dark matter with a giant needle sticking out of the tip of it.
"This might get messy Kim, so I would appreciate it if you don't get in my way of sedating Ronald here." Without a word the bazooka armed and Darkon took careful aim and fired a Naco from a side compartment first leading Ron's attention away from them to eat it exposing his rear end and then Darkon pulled the trigger.
The events after that should never be repeated, but Ron went unconscious three minutes and twenty seven seconds later.
"End Chapter. Owwww…. talking now seriously hurts."