Chapter 4
Interrogation
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After recovering enough to retrieve his forehead protector to stuff it in his back pocket, Iruka made his way back. He could use a drink, a good stiff one. What had he ever done to deserve the attentions of the most dangerous nin in the village? Pondering this turn of events, Iruka entered the village. Touching his lips again, he sighed. Damn if the man could kiss. Remembering why he had left his apartment, Iruka headed for the market.
By late afternoon, he had stocked his kitchen with edibles and cleaned the fridge. He really should clean it out more often. No telling when one of the new lifeforms would take a liking to human flesh. Washing his hands, he left his apartment for Ichiraku's. He could do with some miso pork ramen. It would make him feel better. Before long, he was happily slurping down his late lunch and taking sips from the cool green tea by his elbow. He chatted with the owner and was soon on his way, happily fed.
Wandering around the village, he didn't encounter Kakashi, which he was happy about. He was still shaken from earlier. By late afternoon, Iruka couldn't find anything better to do so he headed back home to fix a light meal and turn in early. He refused to think about what had happened that morning. He would plan out some training for the next few days and throw himself into it.
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Genma took the report scroll from a young Jounin and waved him out the door. Glad that the day was finished and all that was left was to take the Genin team leaders reports, he filed away the few remaining reports and waited. Something he was having trouble with today. He wanted to tell every single person that had walked into the office about Kakashi's accident, but instead, bit the inside of his cheek. Catching a noise from outside, he turned toward the door as an arguing Kurenai and Asuma walked in.
"I'm not saying that I don't want to come over tonight, it's just that Shikamaru's mother asked me over for dinner," Asuma complained, the habitual cigarette hanging from his mouth.
Kurenai sniffed and handed her report to Genma. "Fine. Whatever."
"Now don't be like that, Kurenai!" Asuma wailed, tossing his report to the blinking Genma. "I'll make it up to you tomorrow night. I swear!"
The red eyed woman glared at Asuma for a moment then smiled. "You better, you ape. I want sake and sukiyaki."
Genma grinned hugely at the now stuttering Sarutobi. As the couple were arguing over where to go the next night, Anko, Izumo and Kotetsu strolled in, the two men staying a few steps behind the psychotic kuniochi. She touched the seal on her shoulder and shot a glance back at the cowering Jounins.
Rolling her eyes, she exclaimed, "What the hell is wrong with you two?"
Kotetsu gave her a sickly grin. "Nothing, Anko-sensei. Nothing at all."
"Bullshit. Spill it," she spat, propping her hip on Genma's desk.
Kotetsu looked at his friend and back to Anko. "Well, uh, I was wondering if you had plans for tonight? Not that I'm asking you out or anything, uh, but would you like to come with us to that new bar that opened up?" He pointed back at Izumo to make it clear who else was going. Smiling wickedly, she agreed. Kotetsu gulped and thanked her.
"You really shouldn't terrify the poor kid, Anko," Kurenai piped up, having finished her debate with Asuma. "Besides, he's cute, if you can disregard that strip of cloth over his nose." Laughing, the two kuniochi talked about their days as Genin.
Glad that his audience was all gathered, Genma cleared his throat. When he had their attention, the senbon dancing around his mouth, he said, "I've been sitting on this for most of the day, so I hope you all appreciate the pain this has caused me." He gave them a pained looked.
"What is it, Genma?" Kurenai asked, leaning into Asuma.
Anko sensed blood in the water and pierced Genma with her violet eyes. "I smell gossip and it's the kind I like. Spit it out, Gen-gen."
Genma winced at her pet name for him. "Don't call me that, Ko-ko." Her eye twitched at her old nickname. "Now, as I said before, I've waited all day for this." He leaned against one of the filing cabinets and grinned. "It seems that Kakashi is a peeper."
Kurenai and Anko gasped. Not their Kakashi! No! The two women had been part of the Kakashi fan club for years. They worshipped the ground he walked on. They had even fought over who was going to get the Jounin as they went through their Chuunin training. This was unthinkable.
"Who was he spying on?" Kotetsu asked, still trying to assimilate this stunning revelation.
"Oh it was more than spying," Genma elaborated. "Kakashi ran into Iruka at the training field near the monument yesterday. Iruka had been relieving his anger and tired himself out. Anyway, Kakashi was watching him. Iruka got pissed and stalked off. I'm betting Kakashi was thinking perverted thoughts." Genma dodged a kunai. "Anko, that wasn't funny."
"Don't talk about Kakashi-sensei that way!" she growled.
Keeping an eye on Anko, he continued, "Anyway, later Kakashi needed a spare change of clothes and since Iruka was the only one home, he went to ask him," Genma paused to let them stew. He watched them for a second to make sure that they were getting antsy, then spilled the rest. "As it happened, Iruka wasn't answering his door and Kakashi knew he was at home. So good ole Kakashi decides to go through a window. He found Iruka." By this time, the group was held rapt. There was nothing like a bunch of ninjas that thrived on gossip.
"Well?" Asuma prodded, lighting another cigarette.
"Well, Iruka had just finished his bath and was startled to see Kakashi looming in his window. When Kakashi was asking him for a change of clothes, Iruka threw his hairdryer at him," Genma said nonchalantly.
Anko screwed her face up. "Why the hell did he do that for?" No one could tell her anything bad about Kakashi.
Genma laughed evilly, a glint in his eyes. "Remember it was raining last night?" When they said yes, he finished his little tale. "You see, Iruka didn't just throw it at him, he threw it at his feet. Can you guess what happened after that?" Oh, this is great! "Kakashi, elite Jounin, former ANBU, and the most dangerous man in this village, was blown out of a Chuunin's bathroom window!"
Gasps filled the air. Anko and Kurenai had a deadly shine in their eyes. Everyone started to talk at once. None of them could believe that thier hero was taken down by a Chuunin, much less a teacher! Asuma was laughing so hard he dropped his cigarette. Izumo and Kotetsu just looked stunned and were talking amongst themselves. Anko and Kurenai were making plans to get back at the teacher.
It was great to be the head of the Vine.
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Kakashi sneezed.
"I'll kill him. I swear to God, I will."
A small pug looked up from his perch on Kakashi's futon. "Kill who and why?"
Snarling, the Jounin tore into his steamed dumplings. He swallowed before answering. "Genma."
Pakkun perked an ear, but otherwise didn't move. "Genma?"
"Yes, Genma. He's told them, I just know it!" He ripped another dumpling apart.
Pakkun raised his head. "Told who what?"
Kakashi thought about not telling his long time partner about it, but, if he didn't, Pakkun would find a way to get the information. Tossing the now empty dumpling box into the trash, he drank the last of the sake in the bottle. Leaving his mask on the table, he pushed away from the little table and sprawled across the small space, laying his head on the futon.
"He's told the damn Vine about my little adventure last night," he groused, scratching his stomach.
Now Pakkun was even more interested. "Adventure?"
Looking up at the pug, Kakashi grimaced. "Yeah, adventure or should I say misadventure. I went to the monument yesterday and instead found Iruka beating the hell out of himself for losing his temper." Pakkun made a questioning woof. "He lost his temper with a girl that hit him with three kunai during an exercise. It cost him the rest of the year at the Academy." He placed a hand under his head. "I don't blame him though. Kids are annoying little bastards."
"Is that why you track Naruto around? Why you worry about Sasuke? Go over to Sakura's to give her some new medical jitsus?" Pakkun snorted.
Kakashi had the grace to blush, but glared at his friend. "That's different. Those are my kids now." Pakkun just huffed. "Besides, Iruka looks good all sweaty and tired looking."
"Spare me, please," Pakkun groaned, rolling over to stare at the ceiling. "So what is this adventure you were going on about?"
Kakashi told the little pug about the trouble he had and what the result of last night cost him. Then about his run in with Genma and Raidou. His eye twitched when the pug started to laugh. He didn't dare tell Pakkun about kissing Iruka.
"It's not that funny, Pakkun."
Pakkun stopped laughing long enough to loll his tongue out and pant a few times. "It's hilarious. To think that my master was taken out by a Chuunin. In a bath towel. With a blowdryer!" That sent the pug off into more woofs and whines. "And then you having to run around in that yukata all morning!"
Kakashi swatted at the dog, missing. "I'm going to the hot springs tomorrow. Want to come with me?"
Pakkun shook his head. "They don't allow dogs into the hot springs, you idiot."
Kakashi grinned. "Oh yeah."
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A few days later saw Iruka training with Gai. He had asked the taijitsu master to help him. He never should have asked the man for his help. Gasping for breath, Iruka collasped onto the soft grass under an old oak. With it being hot, he had taken his shirt off and was using it to mop the sweat from his face. Gai jogged up to him and smiled at him.
"Are you all right, Iruka-sensei? I didn't think two hundred laps around the training field would tax you this much, not with you being in the springtime of your youth," he boomed, striking a pose with his hands on his hips.
"Gai-sensei, I'm not used to this much exercise," Iruka breathed heavily, still trying to catch his breath.
Gai looked puzzled. "Don't you chase those little munchkins around all day at the Academy? Surely they keep you on your toes?"
Iruka shot a glare at the smiling Jounin. "That's different. It doesn't take long to catch them and tie them up."
Gai boomed with laughter. "That's the spirit!"
"By the way, where is Lee?" Iruka asked, sitting up.
The Blue Beast sank to the ground, knowing he had gotten much more from the teacher than he had originally planned with this impromptu training session. He leaned back on his hands as he looked to the sky.
"My Lee is still recovering. After that incident with Kinimaro, he needed to finish his rehabilitation. Though what great spirit my student has!" Gai gushed.
Iruka winced a little. He liked the taijitsu master, even considered him a friend, but the man was way to overdramatic. Iruka smiled brightly at the grinning and weeping Gai.
"He is definitely worthy of being your student, Gai-san," Iruka murmured. "I've rested enough, so why don't we start on some basic taijitsu?"
Hearing his favorite words, Gai jumped up and put Iruka through several katas using his hands and feet to deflect his rapid fire kicks and punches. He was surprised at the Chuunin's reflexes, being faster than he expected. I guess being around unruly children made you get faster or lose an eye or some other body part. Ducking down, Gai lashed out with a right leg to sweep Iruka from his feet, not surprised when he jumped up and shot a quick low roundhouse kick to his head. Gai ducked, leaning back, using the motion to swing back and lift his feet for a double upward kick. Iruka leapt back and took a defensive stance, waiting for the Jounin to get his feet under him. As Gai gained his feet, he jumped forward, throwing a series of straight punches into Iruka's chest.
Iruka wasn't fast enough to dodge some of the punches and was thrown back a few steps. Using this small reprieve, he formulated a quick offense. As Gai came at him again, he dropped. Not expecting this, Gai jumped up sailing over the teacher. Iruka smiled and kicked straight up, catching Gai in the chest throwing him off balance. Not letting this opportunity pass him by, he kicked again, hitting Gai's hip and spinning him around to scrape across the grass on his back. Iruka jumped to his feet.
Feeling dizzy, he immediately dropped to his knees. Squeezing his eyes shut, he waited for the world to stop spinning. He felt a hand on his shoulder.
"Are you alright, Iruka-san?" Gai asked, concern lacing his words.
"I'm just a little dizzy. I'll be alright in a minute," he replied, looking up and smiling.
Gai decided to call an end to their training. After planning another session the next day, Gai wished his new student well and took off running, saying something about keeping a promise. Iruka laughed to himself and sat until he felt he could stand. A little wobbly in the legs, he gathered his discarded shirt and a bottle of water from under the oak. Stretching, he went back home. He was very hungry and there was some left over ramen in the fridge with his name on it.
Showered and fed, Iruka sat reading on the couch. Since his duties were suspended, he'd stayed at home catching up with his newest book. He hadn't been out for a while nor had he seen anyone from the mission office recently. It was still early, so he put the book down and headed out. The last few nins should be coming in with thier reports, so that meant the Vine would be in session shortly. Come to think about it, he hadn't heard much of anything floating around the Vine in the last week. Usually there was always something on the Vine. Curious, Iruka increased his pace.
Reaching the stairs to the office, Iruka ran into Anko and Kurenai. They looked at him and giggled. What the hell was that about? The went into the office ahead of him still giggling. Asuma, Izumo and Kotetsu were leaning against a wall, Asuma smoking a cigarette and commenting on the new technique Ino had worked out. When Iruka stepped in, they went quiet.
"What? Do I have something on my face?" he asked, reaching up to inspect his face. Kurenai burst out laughing, Anko following right behind her. Iruka glared at them, placing his hand on his hips. "Alright, what's so damn funny?" he demanded.
Genma chuckled to his left, the senbon dancing. "Probably about your little fight with Kakashi."
Iruka blushed and stuttered, "F...fight?"
Anko sidled up next to him, a look of pure delight in her eyes. "Yes, Iruka-san, your fight." She smiled.
Iruka turned white. That woman was scary when she smiled. "Um..."
"Oh! You must tell us what happened, Iruka-san," Kurenai purred, coming up on the other side of him. "And tell us everything." She flicked a finger under his chin.
Iruka gulped and backed into a wall, the two kuniochi crowding close. It didn't help his nerves that the men cam up behind the women. Shit, how had they found out about that?
"Alright, alright," he cried. "Kakashi found me and tried to pummel me. He punched me and I ran. He caught me and then kissed me!" Everyone blinked and took a step back with blank expressions on thier faces. "What?" he asked a little shakily.
"What do you mean 'kissed' you?" Anko demanded, sticking her face into his.
Iruka gulped. He was in trouble, he just knew it. "Well, you know, he kissed me. On the mouth." He looked to either side of the psychotic woman's head, anywhere but her eyes. He was bright red and it was getting very hot in the office.
Kurenai and Anko let out twin squeals of disbelief, Asuma looked confused, Kotetsu and Izumo looked stunned, and Genma cackled in glee. They all were looking at him with mixed expressions, but the most prominent was curiousity. Oh God! What now? He blushed redder and looked down at his feet.
Genma pushed his way to Iruka's side and slapped an arm around his shoulders. "I knew he was like that, but I didn't know you were like that, too." Genma grinned at him, waggling his eyebrows up and down.
Iruka snarled and threw the arm off. "I'm not! Well, not really. Oh hell! I don't know anymore!" he exclaimed, throwing his arms into the air.
Genma made a sound low in his throat. "Have you heard anything from the Vine this last week?"
"No," Iruka said petulantly. Anko and Kurenai were looking at him weird. "Will you two stop that. It makes me nervous."
"Well, the little incident with the blowdryer was all over the village," Genma supplied, putting a hand on Iruka's shoulder. "You haven't been out much have you?"
"No." Iruka did a double take. "What do you mean the incident with the blowdryer? How the hell did you find that out?" He fixed the Jounin with his best teacher glare.
Giggling, Genma related his run in with the yukata wearing Kakashi the morning after. He then told him that he had kept it quiet until the Vine vice-captains had come in. "And let me tell you that it was painful. Keeping that kind of thing to myself all day." Throughout his narrative, Genma hadn't paid much attention to Iruka. He never felt the punch coming.
"You asshole! That's why he was pissed enough to track me down and try to beat the shit out of me!" Iruka yelled, standing over the Jounin. "It's all your fault!" Anko and Asuma grabbed him as he lunged at the backpedaling Genma. "I'll kill you!"
"Now, Iruka," Asuma soothed, struggling to hold onto the irrate teacher. "He didn't mean to do that. Did you Genma?" he asked, fixing him with a look.
Genma wiped blood from his lip as he stood. The senbon had stabbed into his gums as he was thrown back. He hadn't known Iruka could move that fast. "Truly, I didn't mean to make him mad. Just, I don't know, ruffle his feathers."
During the whole exchange, Izumo and Kotetsu stood silent. Things were getting really good. Iruka was gay, Kakashi had kissed Iruka after trying to beat him up, and Iruka had nailed Genma. They couldn't wait to tell the others. They smiled at Kurenai, who was steadily blinking her red eyes. They turned back to the little tableau as Iruka let out a howl of rage. Giggling, they watched Genma take a step back.
"I swear to God, Genma, I'll get you for this!" Iruka yelled, trying to get out of the elite's grasp. "Mark my words, you gossip, don't turn your back on me for a while. You know what I'm capable of," he warned, his eyes so deep a brown they were almost black.
Genma whimpered and took another step back. He put his desk between him and Iruka. He knew all about Iruka's tricks. He'd grown up with him, went to the Academy together. Oh, yes, he knew all about Iruka's revenge schemes. He was terrified. He felt sick, his skin taking on a green tint.
Anko looked between the two and wondered what this was all about. What the hell was all this fear coming from Genma? Was Iruka that dangerous? She looked at the normally mild-mannered teacher in a new light. If he was that terrifying, why was he still Chuunin? This made her want to know all about Iruka, her curiousity peaked. She shared a look with Kurenai, silently they made plans to meet later and discuss this new piece of information.
"Oh, hello," a new voice said from the doorway. Every head turned toward the newcomer. Giggles and then outright laughter hit Kakashi in a wave. He noticed Asuma and Anko holding onto a livid Iruka. What was this about? he wondered. "I heard the shouting and came to find out what the racket was about." He smiled, his visible eye crinkling.
Iruka growled in a new rage. He twisted his arms out of the twin Jounin grips and stormed out the door, Kakashi stepping out of his way. He watched as he fled down the stairs, finally losing sight of him as he turned a corner. He looked back into the office and was pinned with looks from all the people gathered there.
"Uh, what was that all about?" he asked, grinning and rubbing the back of his head. He could guess what it was about, but not the reason Genma was terrified and bleeding or why Anko was staring out the door with a decidedly evil look in her eyes. He really wanted to know what this was all about.
Asuma lit another cigarette, saying, "Funny you should ask, Kakashi." He took a hit off the cigarette, looking at him out of the corner of his eye. "Since when have you ever lost your temper and took it out on Chuunin teachers? Punching them, chasing them and then kissing them silly?"
Kakashi blushed. Shit! Looking up, he started to back out the door, holding his hands out. He was stopped by Anko blocking his path. He looked at her nervously. She really was scary when she had that look in her eyes.
"I'm not going to like this, am I?" he asked, chuckling nervously and backing into a corner. He blanched at the chorus of negatives. Before he could form a seal, Anko grabbed his hands and held them apart. "Oh, I'm really not going to like this at all."
He whimpered as the pack of Jounins descended on him.
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If this seems a little out of character, it is. This fic is situated right before Naruto is taken away by Jiraiya for his three year apprenticeship and right before the two and a half year time jump in the manga. So there are a lot of things that went on that no one knows about. XP You can shoot me after I finish this fic. : p