A/N: Alright, that took a little longer then expected, but I'd like to think that added in the suspense ;-p.
I think this epilogue takes care of a few lose ends.
But here you have it folks, The USS Blowdryer completed. Please review, it means the world to me.

Oh, even if it's a year from now and you're thinking; 'Neh, why review, he probably wouldn't care...'
Yeah, I do. So, just type a little something.
Thanks!

Disclaimer: For the last time, I do not, I repeat, I do not own Star Trek.

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...EPILOGUE

- USS Blowdryer

'Captain's Log, Stardate: 1.2.3 and a half…
I am sitting in my ready room, enjoying a cup of tea.
Earl Grey. Hot.
All is back to normal on board the Blowdryer. The Alf-outbreak has been countered by erasing all episodes out of the memory-banks. I have advised Starfleet Headquarters to issue a general order to do the same, in order to prevent this anarchy from ever happening again.
Data's role in creating the virus was non-existent. Apparently, a freak subspace-distortion had something to do with it.
I should have known.
I believe Data used the virus because he sub-consciously wanted to be exposed.
He himself claims to have: 'simply been bored.' at the time.
What his future now beholds, no one knows. For now he will continue to serve aboard the Titan.
Speaking of which; the chocolate-cake-thief is yet to be apprehended.
I advised Will to take care of the matter as quickly as possible. A chocolate-cake-thief on the loose could pose as a serious threat to the Federation.
And as for yours truly…
Yes it is true. I am still woman-less. I know, I know, the babes should have been throwing themselves at me, I agree.
But as of yet, I remain single. And lonely. And desperate. And seriously, if I don't get some nookie real fast, I will lose my mind.
Anyway… back to my tea for now…'

Captain Picard sat back and finished his cuppa, when the comm. chimed.

'Captain, Dr Crusher here. I have a medical emergency here in sickbay.'
'Well surely doctor, you are the physician. How could I be of help?'
'Really Captain, your presence is required.'
'Alright, I'll be on my way…'

Sighing, Picard stood up and walked out of his ready-room.

Moments later he entered Sickbay to find it dimly lit.

'Computer, lights.'
'Computer, delay that order.' A voice behind Picard said.

Surprised, Picard turned around, and found Beverly Crusher standing behind him, wearing nothing but a thin, see-through negligee.

'Doctor? I thought there was a medical emergency?'

Then his eyes fell on the all-revealing negligee she was wearing.

'That's hardly a standard Starfleet uniform, is it Beverly?'
'Oh Jean-Luc. I have been thinking.'
'Oh?'
'Yes. I can't stand to be alone anymore, Jean-Luc. And I don't like the idea of you flirting about with young Risan women. Not one bit.'
'Beverly? What are you saying?'
'I'm saying take me, Jean-Luc.'

Crusher pressed herself against her Captain, biting her lip seductively.

'I cannot ignore the chemistry between us any longer, Jean-Luc.' She whispered.
'Take me, Jean-Luc, give it to me. I want to love you, and be loved by you. Regulations be damned!'
'Oh, Beverly, yes!' Picard yelled, stripping off his uniform.
'Oh, Captain, my Captain!' Crusher moaned, pulling Picard onto her.

And so, in a dimly lit sickbay aboard the Swarzeneggar-class USS Blowdryer, finally, finally Picard got his nookie.

.
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THE END