Only if I Chapter 3, a bones fanfic

Ch 3

So this chapter turned out a bit long. Ok really long, but I couldn't find a good place to break it. So you might want to settle in for a long and (hopefully) good read.

Booth's hand snaked out from underneath the blanket, searching for the warm body next to him, but he felt only cold sheets. The sun had already risen and was burning off the few remaining clouds. It was a beautiful morning, except that he was alone. One of his last thoughts before falling asleep last night was that she might not be there when he woke up. He had pulled her even closer towards him, holding her body tight against his as they drifted off. But apparently he hadn't held her tightly enough.

Sitting up he rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. He glanced towards the bathroom, hopeful that was where she had gone, but it appeared dark. The connecting door to her room, however, stood wide open. Swinging himself out of the bed, he looked around for his clothes. He slipped his black boxer briefs on and noticed his pants crumpled in the corner, but he didn't bother with them. Booth closed his eyes and took a deep breath before walking through the open door.

Brennan was sitting, clearly deep in thought, on her still-made bed, her messy hair concealing most her face. She was wearing the t-shirt from yesterday and in her right hand she clutched the remainder of her clothes.

"Morning," Booth said his voice low. At his words she started, brushing her hair out of her eyes and looking at him.

"Hi," she replied in a small voice. Shyly, she pulled her clothes into her lap, clasping her hands tightly together.

Booth crossed the room and leaned up against the table, folding his arms against his bare chest. "Bones," he began gently, "what are you doing?"

"I'm," She started, then hesitated, "I am going to get dressed." Her voice was unexpectedly light. But she didn't meet his eyes.

"Really," he said as he stepped in front of her. With his finger, his lifted her head until she had no choice but to look at him. "Cause it seems like you are freaking out."

She shook her head and stood up, brushing past him. "No, I'm not," she insisted. "Besides," she said as she tugged at the bottom of her shirt wishing for more length. "There is nothing to freak out about."

"So why are you all the way over there?" Booth asked pointing to her new position across the room.

Brennan was clearly flustered. "I told you. I'm going to get dressed." She surveyed his tight shorts and bare chest, "And you should too."

Shaking his head, Booth decided he couldn't let it drop. He thought things were settled last night, but he knew they had to sort some of this out right now. They couldn't screw this up. "It's ok to be scared, Bones." Her head snapped up and she opened her mouth to protest, but Booth spoke first. "It's a big thing. And, I'll tell you, I was scared when I woke up this morning and you were gone."

Brennan looked at him in realization. "Sorry," she whispered. "I didn't think, I just-" She paused as she searched for a word.

"Freaked out?" Booth supplied with a sly grin. A chuckle escaped her lips despite her attempt to contain it.

"Fine," she admitted, "I freaked out." The familiar playful expression on Booth's face at her admission eased her. It was Booth, her closest and most trusted friend. She knew that she could be herself with him and that he would always accept her.

Slowly, Booth moved forward and wrapped his arms around her. After several seconds, she dropped the clothes she was still holding and relaxed against him. They stood in silence until Booth asked in a reluctant whisper, "Do you regret last night?" His breath caught in his lungs as he waited for her answer.

The seconds passed slowly as Brennan stayed silent. She pulled back slightly and he exhaled loudly, his hands on her waist. "No," she said looking him straight in the eye, "I don't." Sliding her arms up, she traced her fingers through the back of his hair and kissed him. Her kiss was passionate and full of promise, but when she broke it off he followed her lead, despite his other ideas.

"We can't mess this up," she said seriously.

"I know," Booth said rubbing her arm reassuringly. "We can take this slow, you know. Figure out what works for us. Bones, we can do this."

The caring and confidence in his voice caused her eyes to fill with tears. He was so sure and had so much faith in them. She'd never been good with relationships and had little faith in her ability to be a 'good' girlfriend. But she had faith in Booth, faith in their partnership. After all this time, he knew her better than anyone and he still wanted her. Still believe they could make a relationship work. Too emotional to trust herself to speak, she smiled at him.

They kissed again, but this time it was Booth who ended it. "We should get ready and grab some breakfast so we can finish with Mrs. Morgan and get the heck out of here."

"Right," Brennan nodded, grateful for something normal to focus on.

"Are you going to apologize to Mrs. Morgan?" Booth asked.

"No," she said immediately.

"Please," Booth begged, giving her a face that would make his young son proud.

"No," Brennan insisted again, though she sounded less adamant. "You're asking me to do this just because we slept together."

"I would ask anyway," Booth said. He lowered his hands to the hem of her shirt and slipped them underneath. "But I expect you to say yes because we slept together." His hands moved up over her ribs before Brennan shooed him away.

"Fine. I will apologize," she allowed frowning at Booth's triumphant look. "But only because we need her as a witness."

"Whatever you say Bones," he teased in a singsong voice. "Come to my room when you're ready and we'll get going."

"Mrs. Morgan, I want to apologize for my behavior yesterday," Brennan began in her most sincere tone. "I was out of line and I apologize. I understand that people respond to grief in different ways and I should have been more sensitive. I'm sorry."

"That's alright," Becky said. "And you are right, I know better, but I can't help it. Thank you for apologizing though."

Booth shifted on the couch next to Brennan, touching her leg briefly before taking over the conversation. "Becky, we still have a few questions," Both started.

Brennan tried hard to focus on the interrogation, but their words began to fade into the background. Her skin prickled where Booth's hand had brushed against her. And she suddenly found herself distracted by the thought of how he looked in his underwear, the tight black boxer briefs that so nicely accentuated his anatomy. He was probably wearing them right now…

"They had been friends for so long. They played on the company softball team together every year. Went fishing together," Mrs. Morgan said. Brennan snapped back to attention. Heat crept up her face as she noticed they were both watching her.

Booth leaned over and whispered, "You ok, Bones?"

Nodding, Brennan said, "Yes, please continue." She was embarrassed by her lack of attention. This is why you aren't supposed to sleep with your partner, she couldn't help but think. Doubling her efforts to follow the line of questioning, she managed to follow along, but didn't add any of her own.

"If you think of anything else, you know how to get in touch," Booth said as the three of them stood at the door. Becky's posture was slouched and her eyes were bleak, but there was an air of resolve in her manner. For the first time, Brennan was struck with a pang of empathy. The woman was almost the same age as her and she had lost the man she loved. Brennan's thoughts went involuntarily to the man next to her. Impulsively, she hugged Becky, "I'm sorry," Brennan said. Becky held onto her for an extra moment before letting go.

"Thank you both," Becky said, tears in her eyes.

They stood on the porch after Becky shut the door. Booth put his arm on her back. "That was good, Bones," he whispered into her ear.

Several hours later Booth sang along softly to the Led Zeppelin song on the radio and looked over at his sleeping partner. Despite it being the middle of the day, she had fallen asleep less than an hour after they had started driving. Booth didn't wake her. She looked so serene when she was asleep. But he was definitely going to tease her about the small strand of drool hanging off her lip.

In spite of what he had told her about taking it slow, Booth had his doubts that slow was even possible. Their lives were already so intertwined, this next step …. He knew he wouldn't back down, but he wasn't so sure about her. Any moment he expected her to tell him they couldn't do this. He didn't want to wake up every morning and have to check to see if she was still there. Patience. It was going to take patience. And maybe some faith on his part.

"Bones," Booth said shaking her shoulder. "Wake up, we're almost back."

"What … I fell asleep?" she asked bewildered.

"That's ok. I guess something really tired you out last night." Booth couldn't resist adding. His wit was met with rolled eyes. Clearing his throat he asked, "So do you want to go to the lab or …?" He asked despite already knowing the answer. What he wanted to do was ask her to come to his place where they could spend all afternoon in his bed, but he didn't.

"It's three?" Brennan asked, squinting into the sun at the clock on the dash.

"Yeah," Booth said.

"I really should check in at the lab."

"The lab it is then," Booth said somewhat regretfully.

Brennan pulled out her Blackberry and busied herself with email until they arrived at the Jeffersonian. She put the phone back into her purse as he pulled to a stop before the entrance. "You're not coming in?" she asked.

"No, I should report to Cullen." Booth said. Her hand was on the door handle, but instead of opening it she glanced around cautiously. Satisfied that no one was looking, she leaned over and quickly kissed Booth.

"Ok," she said conspiratorially. "Call me later and we can work on the case notes." Brennan hoped out of the car, leaving a slightly stunned Booth behind her.

"So?" Cam asked. The team was assembled in Brennan's office, their faces eager to hear if they had once again caught the bad guy. Brennan was relieved to be back in her lab; the last twenty four hours with Booth had been almost surreal. She had forgotten about the world that existed beyond the two of them. Work was good. She needed to focus and prove that her inattentiveness with Mrs. Morgan was just a fluke. It was possible to do this job and be involved with her partner, she just had to find the balance.

She nodded, "Booth and I believe we have enough evidence for a successful conviction."

"Yes!" Hodgins said as he and Zach exchanged high-fives.

Cam rolled her eyes at them and said, "Great. I want everyone's notes before you leave for the weekend." She ignored the look Angela and Hodgins exchanged. "No exceptions, people," she said before turning and marching out. Hodgins and Zach followed behind, arguing over who had do the write-up on the time of death.

Angela stayed behind and sat on Brennan's desk. "So," she said suggestively, "how was your night with Booth?" Brennan stayed stationary, trying not to break her poker face. Angela can't possible know anything, she assured herself.

"The separate rooms at the Vacation Inn don't really lend themselves to discussion," Brennan said, putting an extra emphasis on 'separate' hoping her friend would drop her inquiry. Angela was her best friend and when Brennan finally told someone, she would be the first. But she wasn't at that point yet.

"Ok. Ok," Angela said in defeat. "But one of these days when I ask you …" She trailed off leaving it perfectly obvious what she meant.

Smiling gratefully at Angela, Brennan tried to change the subject, "Another case solved, huh?"

Angela ignored her and leaned across the desk, studying her friend carefully. Brennan felt herself wither under Angela's intense scrutiny. "So do you miss Sully?" Angela asked.

"Not really," Brennan answered truthfully. "Look, I really need to get to work."

"Did you and Booth talk about why you stayed?" Angela asked undeterred by her friend's reticence.

"Ange, please." Once again, Angela had read the situation correctly. Brennan didn't want to lie to her, but she just wasn't ready to discuss it.

"Ok Bren," Angela said thoughtfully patting her shoulder before she stood up. "But we are in need of some serious girl talk." Angela had known from the beginning that Brennan and Booth were prefect for each other. Not much had changed her mind and, more importantly, not much had changed her friend's mind. If Brennan was going to fall for anyone else it would have been Sully. He was a great guy, good looking and easy going. But Brennan had another man in mind, whether she admitted it or not. Angela turned back to speak, but Brennan was already immersed in her computer.

"Brennan," she answered absently when the phone rang later.

"Hi, Bones." she felt a flip in her stomach at the sound of his voice.

"Booth," She said stifling a yawn. Looking at the clock she was surprised to see it was almost nine. She had expected Booth to call much earlier. "It's late."

"I know," he said and she knew from his tone what his next words would be. "There's a body," he said the words slowly as if delivering bad news. She couldn't help the sigh that escaped from her lips.

"We can go out there first thing tomorrow," Booth said. "It's late and we are both tired."

"Are there lights at the scene?" Brennan asked.

"Yes," Booth said. They'd been working together long enough for him to anticipate her questions. And, unfortunately in this case, her reactions.

"We should go out there tonight," she said, trying to sound like her heart was in it. "Pick me up here, you can fill me in on the way."

"Local PD says some hunters found the body off the side of the road. One of their dogs got a hit on it. Supposedly it's almost all bone, but the cops think maybe male based on the clothes. "

"How is it your case?" she asked, not really caring about the jurisdictional details.

"It's on Federal land," he explained simply. Booth watched as his partner fought off another yawn. Guiltily, he thought maybe he shouldn't have told her about the case until tomorrow. "Look Bones, this case isn't urgent. It'll keep till tomorrow."

"Booth, we're doing this," she said annoyed. "We can at least get a good start tonight."

"Ok, Bones," he conceded. Booth wondered if something else was bothering her. They had been back in the 'real world' for several hours and he hoped she hadn't changed her mind about anything. It was one thing to be together in a strange town miles from home. Would the change in their relationship survive the return to D.C.?

"Booth," she said fervently, "for now, I … we shouldn't tell anyone about this. About us." Frowning he looked at her. He hadn't expected to go shouting the news from the rooftops, but he hadn't intended for it to be a secret either. "Just for now," she added sensing his reluctance.

"Alright. But this isn't some dirty little secret." Booth said. "We're not doing anything wrong here."

"Really?" she asked. "I thought the FBI prohibited partners becoming involved romantically."

"They do, Bones," Booth said carefully. He didn't like to point out that they weren't really partners in that sense. "You don't work for the FBI," he said uncomfortably, "so technically those rules don't apply to us." Keeping his eyes on the road, he waited for her reaction.

"I guess you're right," she said grudgingly. They turned a corner and the darkness was disturbed by the staccato flash of police lights. "But for now, you won't say anything?"

"This isn't a rebound thing, is it?" Booth asked, the idea suddenly occurring to him.

"What do sports have to do with this?" Brennan asked confused.

"Never mind," Booth said, choosing not to explain the analogy. "I won't say anything." He agreed parking the Suburban next to a fire truck.

"Thanks, Booth," she said putting a hand on his thigh before climbing out of the truck and switching into work mode.

"Hey, Bones," Booth said putting a hand on her back and bending down next to her. She had been working carefully freeing the remains from the swampy weeds and mud that ensnared them. He had been checking out the crime scene and talking to the other officers.

"Well," she said, blowing a lock of hair out of her eyes. "It's a male, probably 45 – 55. Significant pre- and post- mortem trauma. Fractures to the left humerus, ulna, trapezium. Almost all of the teeth are missing. The area will need to be screened tomorrow to find any that remain." She paused and looked down at the remains, "Transverse fractures here and here along the fibula," she said pointing to the legs.

"Could that be cause by someone falling down the embankment?" Booth asked pointing up towards the road.

Brennan stood up and stretched, her back sore from hours bent over the remains. Staring off into the artificial light towards the hill she said, "Yes, especially the trauma to the arms and legs." She circled the corpse slowly, a look of deep concentration on her face. "I am unable to discern which injuries took place before death and subsequently the cause of death." She said more to herself than to Booth, but he was listening.

"Ok. Well I guess you've done all you can do here," Booth said walking around the body to join her. She opened her mouth to protest, but a hand on her back stopped her. "It's late and you need to sleep." His tone made it clear that they were through for the night.

Brennan yawned again and grinned at him sheepishly. "Alright," she gave up. One of the FBI crime scene techs approached and she shifted putting more space between her and Booth. Booth stood back and watched as Brennan gave the tech explicit instructions for removing and transporting the remains. The tech, who probably knew all this already, stood silent, nodding when appropriate. Booth could tell the kid was enamored with Bones. His look of both awe and fear made Booth smile.

"What are you smiling at?" Brennan asked, pulling off her gloves as she approached him.

"I think you've got a fan," Booth said nodding towards the tech who had been watching her, but turned quickly away. Brennan punched him playfully in the chest and headed for the truck.

The ride back was spent in a comfortable and exhausted silence broken only by occasional and half hearted comments about either case. Neither one was particularly happy to begin a new case before the last was complete. Now in addition to preparing their notes on the Morgan case they had an entirely new case that certainly appeared to be murder thus far.

Booth parked in front of Brennan's building. "So," he said trying to be cheerful, "we've got about three hours before we have to be back at work again." He got out of the car and opened the back, removing her overnight bad and field kit.

"I can get those," Brennan said moving to take the bags from his hands.

"I got it, Bones," Booth said easily and sidestepped her, heading towards her apartment. She followed along behind.

The clock on her microwave read 3:33. Booth yawned loudly as he set her bags down on the kitchen counter. He leaned back against the counter and Brennan joined him at his side. He put his an arm around her and pulled her close, kissing her forehead before resting his head on hers. "I guess I should go," he said with a sigh.

"Why don't you just stay," Brennan suggested reasonably. "We don't have long to sleep and you'll waste time driving."

"Sure," Booth said, easily convinced. He followed her into her bedroom, stopping at the door and watching as she kicked off her shoes and collapsed backwards onto her bed. Booth unbuttoned his shirt and joined her. He lay still for a moment, enjoying the soft comfort of the mattress. Much better than the Vacation Inn. Then he turned on his side and put his arms around Brennan inhaling deeply, enjoying the faint scent of her shampoo. He could feel her take several deep breaths before releasing a contented sigh.

"What did you mean about rebound?" Brennan asked after several minutes of silence.

"It's nothing, Bones," Booth said.

"No, Booth. I really want to know."

"Ok, well you're right, rebound is a sports term. Basketball," he said feeling a small measure of pride that she had recognized that it was sports related. "But in this case it means …. Well, it's like you were dating Sully. Then you guys broke up and we got together. Sometimes when people get out of one relationship they don't want to immediately get in another relationship. So they look for something casual or totally different." Booth stopped, aware that he was doing a poor job at explaining.

"And you think that's what this is?" Brennan asked. "Some sort of diversion?" she questioned, turning over to face him.

"Not for me." Booth said, "But I know that you were happy with Sully and he has only been gone a couple weeks."

"Booth," she said earnestly. "I did have fun with Sully. But nothing like this." Reaching out she touched his face before pressing her lips to his. "I promise," she added settling back into his arms. Ten minutes later, they were both snoring softly.

The lab was in full swing the next day as Brennan studied the bones on the table before her. She wiped at her face with the back of her arm and heard someone approach behind her.

"I'm sorry, sweetie, but there has been too much damage done to pull an ID from dentals," Angela said apologetically. She knew that wasn't the information her friend wanted to hear.

"Where is Zach?" Brennan asked irritably. Her lack of sleep over the last several nights was definitely catching up with her.

"I'm right here, Dr. Brennan," He said popping up behind her.

"Finish cataloging the injuries," She ordered. "We need to determine which injuries were pre- and post-mortem."

"We still think the gunshot to the back of the head was the fatal wound, right?" Zach asked as he took over for Brennan at the table.

"It looks that way, but we need to be sure," Brennan insisted. She needed to call Booth and fill him in on the mornings discoveries. This case didn't look like it was going to be easily solved. And she still had her notes to complete from the Morgan case. Well, she could only do one task at a time.

"Ange, when you get the reconstruction done -"

"I'll send it over to the FBI, don't worry Bren," Angela said.

Later, Hodgins entered her office carrying a small petri dish. "Found something interesting," he said setting it down in front of Brennan.

"Is that some sort of fang?" Brennan asked as she studied the specimen.

"Yup." Hodgins announced proudly. "Found it in some of the clothing."

"It's broken," she said pointing to one end. "Any idea what kind of snake?"

Hodgins shook his head. "Not too sure. I haven't taken the time to research it yet. There's a lot of material to examine … I thought maybe you could consult a herpetologist," he offered as he slowly backed out of the office.

"Ok," Brennan said laughing. "I'll do that. Good work Hodgins." He smiled before leaving.

Brennan pulled up her contact list and searched through the names. She knew a herpetologist at Georgetown and though they hadn't spoken in a while, she hoped he would be willing to help.

"Yes, this is Dr. Brennan calling for Dr. Marr," she said to the receptionist. To her surprise her call was put right through.

"Tempe?" Doug asked as if he wasn't sure he'd heard his secretary correctly.

"Yes, Doug, it's me. I know it's been a long time since we talked, but I was hoping you could help me with something. For work," she added hastily.

"Calling me up out the blue and asking for a work related favor, must be Tempe Brennan."

Sounds like the same old arrogant Doug, she thought, but didn't say.

"We found a fang at a crime scene," she pressed on, "I was hoping you could identify it for us."

"So you're sure your not calling me up for a date?" His cavalier question was met with silence. "And you still have no sense of humor, I see," he said dryly. "You're lucky you caught me. I'm leaving the country tomorrow. Can you get it here this afternoon?"

Brennan checked the time. She supposed she could take an hour to deliver the fang. Something about it felt important. But I'm not going with my gut here, she admonished herself. "Sure, I'm leaving now."

"Hi Angela," Booth said from the door of her office. Angela looked up from the drawing she was working on.

"Booth," she replied with a smile. "What's up?"

Booth raised the file in his left hand, "Got some possible John Doe's. Is Brennan around?"

"No," Angela said shaking her head. "Hodgins found a snake fang or something in the clothes and Brennan took it to a herpetologist to get it checked out."

"I just talked to her like forty minutes ago and told her I was coming over." Booth was annoyed. "She could have called if she was going to go running off." He muttered.

"Well you know how she gets when she's working," Angela said with a shrug. Booth stood still, his eyebrows knitted in consternation. "I'm sure it's not because she used to date him," Angela couldn't help but add. Booth was so easy to tease.

"The herpes guy?" Booth asked sharply, unable to hide his interest.

"Yeah," Angela answered slowly, surprised by his reaction. "It was a few years ago and she never said much about it." His face was dark and Angela wished she hadn't said anything.

"Ok, thanks," Booth said distractedly as he walked out of her office.

Might as well stop here. I'll probably won't get the next chapter up this weekend, as I haven't written much of it yet. I did write a bit of one of the last chapters, which involves a shootout. So much fun to write.

Please let me know what you thought. Any parts you especially liked or didn't like? Thanks.