disclaimers: not mine, none of the trademarked things are either.
warnings: boy x boy love
notes: Couples: (because I'm one pervy girl) Severus/Remus/Sirius, Ron/Draco/Harry. By the way, I make a pretty stupid attempt at spoofing those who dont want us to like yaoi, lol. Like that entire law suit thing. You'll see what I"m talking about. So if I insult anyone who likes yaoi (that would include myself) I'm doing it to intimidate the bigots. I do make fun of posers and superficial girls so if your one of them, sorry!
Translations: tachi (and company)
Chapter 2- Severus and Sirius do WHAT?!!!
Evil Parvati snickered at her sidekick Dastardly Villanious Lavendar. The two girls had discovered that one of their various and assorted doujinshi's were missing! Oh, what a horrid discovery! Parvati smirked as she and Lavendar went downstairs to the Common Room, a doujinshi edge coveniently showing from underneath the folds of a notebook. The darker haired girl was in high spirits, her plan to get the boys into one huge orgy just steps closer to being achieved. Parvati smiled ferally, peeking at two parts of the soon-to-be menage a trois.
Ron and Harry were looking worse for the wear. Their eyes were bloodshot from lack of sleep, black bags were quite unbecoming, and their hair's were seemingly more touseled. Hermione shot the two girls a knowing nod, trying her best not to giggle and point at the oblivious Harry and Ron. Lavander and Parvati joined Hermione, laughing silently at the terrror filled glances Ron and Harry sent one another. Ah, the wonders of smut-filled doujinshi! It was enough to make a girl cry.
The Great Hall was loud with bursting adolescents, the delicious aroma of sustenance wafting on the air. Parvati-tachi settled into their respective seats, each girl grinning from ear-to-ear at the resident boys. Seamus, Dean, and Neville sweatdropped at the conniving, evil girls. Yes, they all knew something was going on but with a little bit of persuasion from the girls, they were to be quiet. Besides, Parvati allowed Seamus access to the collection of doujinshi.
Parvati leaned close to Seamus, another one of her plans being set into motion. "Have you talked to Justin yet? I know your dieing to use some of those positions in the Gravitation Remix number 4." Seamus rolled his eyes. Justin was his current obsession and Parvati was attempting to help Seamus into convincing Justin that women were evil creatures that needed to be stopped before their yaoi doujinshi's leaked into the entire populace and turned the world into homosexuals! They must be stopped! Their days of converting innocent boys is over! Their days of terrorizing pure girls into yaoi freaks must be halted! Oh, got carried away there...
"I haven't yet. Merlin, are you trying to make him gay?"
Parvati went smug. "Well of course I am Seamy. What makes you think he isn't already?" She nodded towards the sandy haired boy at the Hufflepuff table. He had more mannerisms and style than Lavendar, and that was saying loads! It was rumored, he cared more about his appearance than Draco Malfoy! A scandal!
Seamus shrugged indifferently. "Just because he's pretty doesn't mean he's gay."
Parvati huffed, arms going akimbo on her waist. "So Malfoy isn't gay? He's pretty too!"
"Point taken."
From across the room, Draco's ears turned beet red at the mention of his name and being put in the sentence with the word gay. How rude! The beautiful blond with the silver flecked slate blue eyes, with the slender and milky colored flesh, with the scrumptiously toned body that screamed sex god Eros. How come people thought he was gay? It wasn't as if it would have been a lie because he was but it went much deeper than anyone thought. His experience with the not-so-fairer-sex-when-compared-with-Draco was absolutely wretched! But, getting into that would be bad because this is a happy fiction. So, he cared about the condition his robes were in? That made him automatically gay? It wasn't as if he was manipulating little boys into hosting their own interior design shows.
"Hey, Dray, do you want to slap that bitch for calling you gay?" Pansy fluttered her eyelashes and Draco resisted the urge to punch the pug in her face. This was why men turned gay. Yes, it was. Girls like Pansy were a complete insult to the entire female gender. Superficial valley girls that said like every five seconds. It sickened Draco to no end. They were posers who were on the verge of mind-controlling the pre-teens into being teeny bopper's and getting pregnant at the age of eleven just so they can be like the fake-breasted Britney Spears!
"Would you shut up Pansy?" Hey, Draco was a pansy. Maybe that was why he didn't like the girl, it was an insult. Draco blinked, meeting eyes with Harry. What the hell was that git's problem? Staring at him wouldn't make him get any. Draco gulped. He did not just think that! Wanting Harry was BAD! Badbadbadbadbadbad! (too much X men Evo) Draco wanted to bang his head against the table but that would cause ugly bruises to form and ruin his perfect complexion.
Harry pursed his lips, looking away from the eye contact with Draco. He couldn't stop thinking about the doujinshi lying in wait underneath his pillow so that he could have wet dreams concerning Draco every night. Though, those would have to involve Ron too. Harry squeaked. What would his friend look like aroused in real life and not drawn? Harry allowed himself the leisure to study the freckled boy next to him. He decided, watching the languid curves in Ron's body as he gesticulated with his hands, that it would be enjoyable. Harry scowled at himself. Those EVIL yaoi doujinshi. The EVIL girls who had them! It was all EVIL.
Parvati-tachi rose from their seats. "We have to speak with Dean and Neville alone." Of course, that meant Lavendar would go snog Dean and Hermione would snog Neville while Parvati went to harass Justin into hating women. Parvati did the Mr.Burns impression from the Simpsons. "Excellent," she murmured to herself as she streaked to the Hufflepuff table.
Harry and Ron raised a brow each, confused by the sudden disappearance of their friends. Seamus was doing his best to keep from Harry and Ron as he vainly tried to hit on any boy in sight. Harry peered at Parvati's school things. Uh-oh. Was that what he thought it was? The material peeking at him wantonly was the same in which the doujinshi he had seen lastnight was made of. Should he? He poked Ron in the side. "Its another one."
Ron eeped, sliding onto the chair on the other side of Harry. He didn't want to look but it was impossible. It was calling to him. Gathering his courage, Ron opened the cover of Parvati's Divination text and was immediately deafened by a bone-curdling scream from Harry. The two turned crimson at the attention they recieved from Harry's outburst but it was definitely understandable. For on the cover of this doujinshi was Severus Snape and Sirius Black!
Severus and Sirius were younger, the Marauder era ones, Harry judged. Severus was between Sirius's legs with the taller boy's arms wrapped around him from behind. It was cute, it was innocent, it was loving. The title was Sadisuto Yariman. What could that have meant? Ah, well, nothing they understood. Harry admired the beautifully drawn picture before turning it.
Ron crowded closer, wanting a glimpse of their scoundrel Potions Professor. Not that kind of glimpse you pervs! Of course, all good things light and loving come to an end and three pages later, Harry let out another yell. Severus was on his knees, mouth placed on Sirius's penis while the long haired boy curled his hands into Severus's hair.
Ron and Harry shivered at the unexpected currents of desire coursing through their bodies. Harry went on to the next page, feeling a certain part of his anatomy fill with blood and expand. This was even more erotic! Severus was on his knees, butt thrust into the air with Sirius poised behind him. Ron was looking at the snarky potions master in a different light now. Was he really that big? Harry wanted to cry. He was becoming horny at the pornographic doujinshi involving his godfather!
And then, a cough caused both boys to jump.
~ *( ~~
Yeah, I had to change the rating to R. -_- I wonder why. :P The sexual scenes won't get worse than that unless I get requests. The NC17 ones I'll place in my yahoo group which you can access by way of this webpage
Sadisuto Yariman: Sadist Sluts (methinks, lol. My dictionary is only good for that, so word order is probably wrong)
Thanks for reviewing
Next chapter: Find out who was coughing and what trouble that brings. Will the EVIL YAOI GIRLS be defeated?! (hah, NEVER! We will survive!)
warnings: boy x boy love
notes: Couples: (because I'm one pervy girl) Severus/Remus/Sirius, Ron/Draco/Harry. By the way, I make a pretty stupid attempt at spoofing those who dont want us to like yaoi, lol. Like that entire law suit thing. You'll see what I"m talking about. So if I insult anyone who likes yaoi (that would include myself) I'm doing it to intimidate the bigots. I do make fun of posers and superficial girls so if your one of them, sorry!
Translations: tachi (and company)
Chapter 2- Severus and Sirius do WHAT?!!!
Evil Parvati snickered at her sidekick Dastardly Villanious Lavendar. The two girls had discovered that one of their various and assorted doujinshi's were missing! Oh, what a horrid discovery! Parvati smirked as she and Lavendar went downstairs to the Common Room, a doujinshi edge coveniently showing from underneath the folds of a notebook. The darker haired girl was in high spirits, her plan to get the boys into one huge orgy just steps closer to being achieved. Parvati smiled ferally, peeking at two parts of the soon-to-be menage a trois.
Ron and Harry were looking worse for the wear. Their eyes were bloodshot from lack of sleep, black bags were quite unbecoming, and their hair's were seemingly more touseled. Hermione shot the two girls a knowing nod, trying her best not to giggle and point at the oblivious Harry and Ron. Lavander and Parvati joined Hermione, laughing silently at the terrror filled glances Ron and Harry sent one another. Ah, the wonders of smut-filled doujinshi! It was enough to make a girl cry.
The Great Hall was loud with bursting adolescents, the delicious aroma of sustenance wafting on the air. Parvati-tachi settled into their respective seats, each girl grinning from ear-to-ear at the resident boys. Seamus, Dean, and Neville sweatdropped at the conniving, evil girls. Yes, they all knew something was going on but with a little bit of persuasion from the girls, they were to be quiet. Besides, Parvati allowed Seamus access to the collection of doujinshi.
Parvati leaned close to Seamus, another one of her plans being set into motion. "Have you talked to Justin yet? I know your dieing to use some of those positions in the Gravitation Remix number 4." Seamus rolled his eyes. Justin was his current obsession and Parvati was attempting to help Seamus into convincing Justin that women were evil creatures that needed to be stopped before their yaoi doujinshi's leaked into the entire populace and turned the world into homosexuals! They must be stopped! Their days of converting innocent boys is over! Their days of terrorizing pure girls into yaoi freaks must be halted! Oh, got carried away there...
"I haven't yet. Merlin, are you trying to make him gay?"
Parvati went smug. "Well of course I am Seamy. What makes you think he isn't already?" She nodded towards the sandy haired boy at the Hufflepuff table. He had more mannerisms and style than Lavendar, and that was saying loads! It was rumored, he cared more about his appearance than Draco Malfoy! A scandal!
Seamus shrugged indifferently. "Just because he's pretty doesn't mean he's gay."
Parvati huffed, arms going akimbo on her waist. "So Malfoy isn't gay? He's pretty too!"
"Point taken."
From across the room, Draco's ears turned beet red at the mention of his name and being put in the sentence with the word gay. How rude! The beautiful blond with the silver flecked slate blue eyes, with the slender and milky colored flesh, with the scrumptiously toned body that screamed sex god Eros. How come people thought he was gay? It wasn't as if it would have been a lie because he was but it went much deeper than anyone thought. His experience with the not-so-fairer-sex-when-compared-with-Draco was absolutely wretched! But, getting into that would be bad because this is a happy fiction. So, he cared about the condition his robes were in? That made him automatically gay? It wasn't as if he was manipulating little boys into hosting their own interior design shows.
"Hey, Dray, do you want to slap that bitch for calling you gay?" Pansy fluttered her eyelashes and Draco resisted the urge to punch the pug in her face. This was why men turned gay. Yes, it was. Girls like Pansy were a complete insult to the entire female gender. Superficial valley girls that said like every five seconds. It sickened Draco to no end. They were posers who were on the verge of mind-controlling the pre-teens into being teeny bopper's and getting pregnant at the age of eleven just so they can be like the fake-breasted Britney Spears!
"Would you shut up Pansy?" Hey, Draco was a pansy. Maybe that was why he didn't like the girl, it was an insult. Draco blinked, meeting eyes with Harry. What the hell was that git's problem? Staring at him wouldn't make him get any. Draco gulped. He did not just think that! Wanting Harry was BAD! Badbadbadbadbadbad! (too much X men Evo) Draco wanted to bang his head against the table but that would cause ugly bruises to form and ruin his perfect complexion.
Harry pursed his lips, looking away from the eye contact with Draco. He couldn't stop thinking about the doujinshi lying in wait underneath his pillow so that he could have wet dreams concerning Draco every night. Though, those would have to involve Ron too. Harry squeaked. What would his friend look like aroused in real life and not drawn? Harry allowed himself the leisure to study the freckled boy next to him. He decided, watching the languid curves in Ron's body as he gesticulated with his hands, that it would be enjoyable. Harry scowled at himself. Those EVIL yaoi doujinshi. The EVIL girls who had them! It was all EVIL.
Parvati-tachi rose from their seats. "We have to speak with Dean and Neville alone." Of course, that meant Lavendar would go snog Dean and Hermione would snog Neville while Parvati went to harass Justin into hating women. Parvati did the Mr.Burns impression from the Simpsons. "Excellent," she murmured to herself as she streaked to the Hufflepuff table.
Harry and Ron raised a brow each, confused by the sudden disappearance of their friends. Seamus was doing his best to keep from Harry and Ron as he vainly tried to hit on any boy in sight. Harry peered at Parvati's school things. Uh-oh. Was that what he thought it was? The material peeking at him wantonly was the same in which the doujinshi he had seen lastnight was made of. Should he? He poked Ron in the side. "Its another one."
Ron eeped, sliding onto the chair on the other side of Harry. He didn't want to look but it was impossible. It was calling to him. Gathering his courage, Ron opened the cover of Parvati's Divination text and was immediately deafened by a bone-curdling scream from Harry. The two turned crimson at the attention they recieved from Harry's outburst but it was definitely understandable. For on the cover of this doujinshi was Severus Snape and Sirius Black!
Severus and Sirius were younger, the Marauder era ones, Harry judged. Severus was between Sirius's legs with the taller boy's arms wrapped around him from behind. It was cute, it was innocent, it was loving. The title was Sadisuto Yariman. What could that have meant? Ah, well, nothing they understood. Harry admired the beautifully drawn picture before turning it.
Ron crowded closer, wanting a glimpse of their scoundrel Potions Professor. Not that kind of glimpse you pervs! Of course, all good things light and loving come to an end and three pages later, Harry let out another yell. Severus was on his knees, mouth placed on Sirius's penis while the long haired boy curled his hands into Severus's hair.
Ron and Harry shivered at the unexpected currents of desire coursing through their bodies. Harry went on to the next page, feeling a certain part of his anatomy fill with blood and expand. This was even more erotic! Severus was on his knees, butt thrust into the air with Sirius poised behind him. Ron was looking at the snarky potions master in a different light now. Was he really that big? Harry wanted to cry. He was becoming horny at the pornographic doujinshi involving his godfather!
And then, a cough caused both boys to jump.
~ *( ~~
Yeah, I had to change the rating to R. -_- I wonder why. :P The sexual scenes won't get worse than that unless I get requests. The NC17 ones I'll place in my yahoo group which you can access by way of this webpage
Sadisuto Yariman: Sadist Sluts (methinks, lol. My dictionary is only good for that, so word order is probably wrong)
Thanks for reviewing
Next chapter: Find out who was coughing and what trouble that brings. Will the EVIL YAOI GIRLS be defeated?! (hah, NEVER! We will survive!)