Authors Note: Whoot! 11! Double digits! How cool is that? This is a short authors note and a short chapter.
Review Replies
Amarthiel- (Grins) Glad you liked it. We did that to one of my friends once (She didn't speak to us for 3 days afterwards)
Black-Nyx- ALASKA! Don't worry; while your story alert is down, my review system is down so I don't hear via email if I have a review and thus I have to go through stats. Anyways… I think super moony powers would be the most awesome thing in the world to possess, and I can't see Remus just coming right out and saying parselmouth in that context. Yes. I thought it was weird the first time someone said that to me too but then I remembered the show. NOOOOO! You shouldn't have just said it was funny! I like descriptions. That is why you are still my God! I live and die for your reviews. By the way, since you didn't give me any advice this time I'm going to assume it was absolutely perfect. YAY! Thanks again for faithfully reviewing.
serafina pekala- I can still read that type but unless the plot is really good I usually get bored after a few chapters. I thought I'd write one the way I would like to have read it.
Parseltongue
Disclaimer: Still don't own the characters. Neither does my cat. Neither does the cyber cookie fairy. Neither does the gay Casanova. Neither does the Grammar Gorilla. Neither do Pinkie or the Brain.
Chapter 7
10th October 1977
"Detention!"
James, Sirius and Remus all sighed with relief. This would not have been their usual reaction to receiving a detention but this was the finale of a twelve minute scolding witnessed by the entire seventh year transfiguration class including Harry, Draco, and Severus (the girls were in COMC). There was humiliation, and then there was humiliation.
And following humiliation, as Severus could have told them, comes revenge.
Harry was not the only Potter with the ability to befriend any number of house-elves with little difficulty and, in their free time before lunch, the marauders and Lily made use of these connections. They were fairly certain that all four time travelers and probably Severus by now would have all round shields up defending them from unfriendly spells, and other problematic attacks. Thus they made use of some potions they had "borrowed" a short while back that temporarily lowered the strength of long term spell casts. From there a simple, whispered reducto would drop the shields entirely leaving them open for attack.
It was Lily who drifted casually around the hall and cast the spell on all five before returning to her seat with none the wiser of her actions. The home team had stuck with Remus' idea of using lower levels for now but, after the transfiguration fiasco, they felt they were entitled to a slightly stronger attack, just to show off slightly. Their reputations would suffer with anything less for by now the whole school knew about the earlier events.
And so it was that several minutes later, the first spell began to take effect. It began with Harry and Ginny, simply because they were closer, and had probably played a major role in earning the first years co-operation.
"Mister Harry, ah what are you doing?" The Billster was the first to notice anything suspicious when Harry began using the palm of his hand to scoop up the mashed potatoes in the bowl in front of him.
"Eating." Harry said giving the boy a funny look as Ginny turned to stare at him. He picked up the closest jug of pumpkin juice and raised it to his lips.
"And Harry begins to drink, one gulp, two gulps, three, and he's putting it down again and heading for the gravy, he scoops it up and lifts it to his plate, oh no it's dribbling! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! And he's got it there, nice play work Harry."
All the surrounding Gryffindors began to slow their conversations and stare as Harry continued to act like a slob and Ginny gave a play-by-play of his every action in a nasal Howard Cossell voice. Slowly, all conversations throughout the hall ceased.
"And he's finish eating, yes! He's getting up! He's on the home stretch now, and he's walking towards the doors and Ooooh! He goes down, a clear trip from Sirius Black. Ouch that's got to have hurt. And he's up again and heading for the Slytherin tables, but what's this? Draco Malfoy has risen to great him, but NO! He's climbed on top of the table and appears to be imitating an eagle through interpretive dance! This isn't something you see every day fellas."
By now, much of the school was either still sitting in stunned silence or in hysterics. Pansy and Severus were sitting rather nervously with their wands drawn, knowing they were next. Unfortunately for them, Peter and Lily had now crawled to their table during the distractions and neither Slytherin heard the whispered dimentichi and spazzoli from beneath the table.
"And Severus Snape has pocketed his wand and appears to be delving into Pansy Parkinson's bag. Surprisingly she doesn't appear to have noticed yet. What's he looking for in there? Ah, he's got it now, and he has… a hairbrush. And he's released his clasp and is combing through his hair. It's a wonder the brush hasn't caught on the grease yet."
As this was happening, Harry had crawled across the Slytherin table and fisted a handful of sticky date pudding strait out of the pot. He wandered back over to the Gryffindor table and sat down, munching on his new acquisition. As he finished it, he wiped his hands on his robe and looked around at the laughing Gryffindors.
"What?" he asked before hearing a scream from the Slytherin table and turning around to gaze horror struck at the scene before him.
It was Pansy who had screamed and she was now slowly standing up, staring at her own hands in absolute horror.
"Oh sweet Merlin! I- I don't remember who I AM!" She cried out "Oh the humanity! The torture, the suffering. Oh wait, I- I think I remember a name. Rita Skeeter! My name is Rita Skeeter."
"And Pansy Parkinson seems to have another case of mistaken identity. Oh and will you look at Draco Malfoy, he appears to be trying to take flight, and oh my, he's succeeded."
"Wheeeeeeeee! Eagle!" Draco screamed as he soared around the room flapping his arms with extraordinary speed.
Harry, having recovered from both the spell and his shock at his compatriots' actions now jumped up and began casting counter curses. First, he got Ginny who blinked, cleared her throat, and then screamed louder then her mother could have ever hoped for. She turned and began yelling insults at the marauders and the returned Lily and Peter. Harry then hit Severus who was more used to this and just pulled his hair back and began trying memory spells on Pansy. Once, that had worked, the pair began assisting Harry in lowering Draco who had now recovered his sense of being and was shaking rather violently as he tried to slow his unwilling flight.
They eventually got him down amidst laughter from the surrounding students.
- - - - -
The one good thing about the events of lunch was that the teachers did not give out any detentions as it was clearly not the fault of any of the five students fault. As it was, however, said five students decided to try some smaller trick throughout the day.
On his way to defense classes, Remus Lupin suddenly realized that James Potters shirt now had "My what big ears you have Remus!" written across the front in bright pink, while Remus' own said "All the better to hear you with my dear."
In retaliation, during defense, Ginny's shirt buttons began to sing the batman theme incessantly until the fed up teacher made her leave to see Flitwick to get it fixed. As the bell rang to signal the lessons end, Lily Evans reached for her school bag only to have it turn into a giant pumpkin with "As the clock struck twelve" written on it. She then gave a shriek as all her clothing turned to rags. Draco began screaming out his love for Professor Kettleburn in the corridors and lost five house points from Professor McGonagall for being crude.
Severus Snape was ambushed on his way to potions but with shields back up, the spell they cast rebound and Sirius Black showed up for Potions, trying to balance with his feet where his hands should have been and his hands where his feet should have been. He lost twenty points and was sent to the hospital wing.
These actions continued until that evening in the great hall, by which time they were all too exhausted to disturb anyone's meal. This was lucky as the teachers were beginning to doubt the students could take anymore excitement. As it turned out, they could.
The meal had almost ended when there came a loud bang from out in the entrance hall. All the students and teachers quickly got up and rushed out to see what was happening.
As they got there, they could see a figure rising to its feet amidst a cloud of smoke. Seeing the audience it had gathered, the figure waved.
"Howdy. Ah, I'm looking for a kid about... er, this high, with black hair and green eyes. Ah, he's very excitable and tends to hold a grudge. Have you seen him?"
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(Grins) did you like it? I sincerely hope so. I realize this chapter is short but I didn't have time to make it longer and still have it out by now. Who do y'all think it is? Did you like the marauders spectacular? I need more prank ideas. Half of these I copied from a boredom list me and my friend created a few years back.
Please review or I shall cry and all the other people who work with me shall drown since the doors here are designed to be impenetrable. There are over 100 workers here plus over 1000 visitors. WOULD YOU REALLY LIKE TO BE RESPONSIBLE FOR THEIR DEATHS? By the way, am I the only one who is no longer getting story or review alerts put though to their email?