Authors Notes: Once again I am writing this Authors Note before I write the actual chapter. This is actually more of a warning though and is as follows: my muse has not yet returned so this is a completely uninspired chapter that I am forcing out of myself so that hopefully my muse will take pity on me and come pay me a visit. I have a new tactic however which I hope will go well. Foreshadowing. I have this theory that if I introduce snippets of things to come, then I will always have something to go back to and write about so that hopefully, it will be sort of like a pre-determined muse. If you want news about when updates are coming or information on the story between said updates, please visit my profile since I am now updating that every fourth day minimum so that I know that y'all are up to date. Abandon Ship has well and truly overtaken this story in the review count… probably since that muse didn't take a surprise vacation. That is all that needs saying, please reviews, please read this AN (although me asking that in the AN is probably kind of pointless). Okay I'm done; on with the replies and the story and whatever.

Review Replies

Delinka- What the heck are "god wind tomatoes"? Thanks though.

Black-Nyx- Aww thanks. Sorry to hear about your computer... mine blew up once. I mean literally blew up. Remus isalways fun to work with as there are so many things one can do with his character. Eeep! If you were impatient for the last update I can't imagine what you must be thinking about this one! Forgive me oh Great God of Reviewers!

imakeeper- Interesting what? Interesting as in "interesting the way that story is the most awesome story in existance" or interesting as in "interesting the way that made me want to throw up my own liver"?

Vellouette- Well, now you'll get two Remus appearences; this one and the one in the next chapter of Abandon Ship. Aww crud, I wish you liked the other one best. Simply because then you wouldn't be cranky with me for not updating this one. Yeah, I figured that too, but then hey, maybe I'll make her an animagus. Could be a fun chapter plus it would be like a side plot I could fall back on if my muse never returns. Wow, your eldest son is only one year younger than me. AND YOU LIKE MY WRITING! Squeeeeeee!!!! eah, I am allowed teenaged ditzy moments every now and then. Seriously though, it is a huge compliment to me.

DarkNinjaBunneh- Glad you laughed. This is in reply for the review for chapter 9 which didn't arrive before I updated.

LandUnderWave- Ah, I kind of replied to this already so I won't bother again. Thanks for agreeing though. I'll let you know if it comes up (it will be a while... I have enough problems writing two stories let alone a third).

Parseltongue or just the normal reason for italics (accentuation)

Disclaimer: Still don't own the characters. Neither does my cat. Neither does the cyber cookie fairy. Neither does the gay Casanova. Neither does the Grammar Gorilla. Neither do Pinkie or the Brain. Neither do the Questies (you know who you are). Neither does Bill Gates (gee there's a surprise). Nor does Stephanie Plum. Nor does my Duty Manager.

Chapter 11

12th October 1977

The pre-breakfast events the following day were not nearly as dramatic. Lily and Sirius had figured out that the problem was the shampoo and thus had borrowed other peoples and eliminated the baldness factor. Harry and Ginny were too tired to try anything new and since the Ravenclaws were already going to be suffering when they found the comics that morning they felt enough had been done. The marauders and Lily were suspiciously quiet as Ginny and Harry prepared for the day in their respective dormitories but both were too tired to notice. They had awoken before dawn, run all over the castle, and not gotten to bed until two in the morning. What were you expecting them to do? A salute to the sun? And thus it was that with the exception of a few Ravenclaws who had become so distraught that they needed to be taken to the Hospital Wing, most students made it to breakfast without incident.

Most.

Ginny Weasley was the unlucky one in this case. Lily, still upset over her hair had informed the marauders that the other red-head was next on the list. Not willing to lose their team mate, the boys had agreed and Ginny had found herself accosted as she made her way down what she had thought to be a deserted corridor, yawning with every third step. As a blinder of some form went over her eyes and she heard a whispered stupefy, she only had one final thought.

'Aw crap, I'm going to miss the Ravenclaws reactions. Damn.'

Of course she probably would have used some much more inventive curses had she known that not only was she about to go through one of the worst days of her life, but she would also miss Remus' visit. Yeah that would have pissed her off good and proper.

It was not long before Ginny returned to consciousness. She did not know this of course but hey, who'd expect her to? Slowly sitting up she took several moments to look around her before finally accepting that she really was where she thought she was.

"Hello?" She called out cautiously, "Anybody? … Harry?"

No success.

"Draco?"

"Pansy?"

"Severus?"

"Professor Dumbledore?"

"James?"

"Sirius?"

"…"

"Voldemort?"

"Hey, d'you know where Ginny is?"

The Billster shook his head and Harry moved on to the next person.

"Do you know where Ginny is?"

After repeating this question many more times and seeing his three Slytherin counterparts were having no luck, Harry sat down puzzled. Not a single student had known where she was and he was sure someone must have seen her. Of course any number of Ravenclaws could have but they had all been too distraught by the discovery of the comics to even hear Harry's questions let alone remember if they had seen a petit red head wondering the halls of Hogwarts. So he had to ask himself… who would be most likely to want to do something to Ginny Weasley? It was of course then that the Marauders and Lily walked in. Their timing was truly impeccable the way they managed to make an appearance just when people were looking for suspicious behavior, the fact that they were all wearing smug grins and doing high-fives all around did not help the matter.

Harry rose quietly to his feet and slipped along the row to where the five were now seated. They were all so busy talking they did not even realize he was there until he was standing only inches behind Lily. He tapped her on the shoulder.

"Mother of Zeus!" She shrieked before falling to the floor.

The Marauders, while shocked at Harry's arrival, all smiled proudly down at Lily.

"She's like our cute little baby sister isn't she fella's." Sirius commented in a sing-song voice.

"Hopefully not mine, else I'd be attempting to commit incest." James said as Harry shuddered at the notion before getting back on topic. Lily just glared at them all as a fourth year helped her back into her seat.

Harry took a breath and got into his Molly/Ginny yelling mentality.

"WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH MY SORT OF SISTER? I SWEAR IF SHE IS IN ANYWAY UPSET I WILL GRAB YOUR BALLS, TWIST THEM ROUND, AND SHOVE THEM SO FAR UP YOUR ARSE THAT YOU WILL NEVER FIND THEM AGAIN!"

For some unknown reason, this little speech caused some discomfort for the four male recipients of its full potency. Lily however, who could yell almost as loudly when upset and lacked the anatomy Harry was threatening, simply smiled charmingly at him.

"But Harry, how could we possibly have done anything to Ginny? She's always with you in the mornings because she doesn't like going down to breakfast alone. Don't tell me you forgot about her did you?"

Harry looked momentarily distraught before remembering that Ginny had started out with him but then sent him off because she had forgotten something and didn't want him to have to wait around. Thus, he felt himself to be exempt of all blame.

"Miss Evans, do not think you are excused from my previous promise. I realize you lack the necessary attributes but don't think I don't know ways to make you grow them." Lily blanched at this, causing Harry to give a slight smirk and do a mental-victory-dance. He was unable to continue giving pressure however because he was interrupted by a loud bang and a cloud of smoke coming from next to the dais the head table sat upon.

Harry grinned as he recognized his sort of Godfather coming out of the cloud coughing slightly and holding four shrunken trunks.

"Remus!" He yelled delighted at the exact same time as Pansy.

Both trouble makers ran towards the man as Draco slowly sauntered over, Severus approached warily, and everyone else paused what they were doing to watch.

"Hello you two. How've you been?" Remus asked giving Pansy a one armed hug and ruffling Harry's hair.

"Oh not bad, we managed to get you to cross dress which was pretty amusing." Pansy said in a nonchalant tone as Remus groaned and cuffed her gently.

"You missy have a lot of cheek to mention that right now when I am here to do you a favour."

"And what sort of favour is it Professor Lupin?" Draco drawled. While he respected the man and appreciated what he did for them, he was a little too aware of exactly how many detentions the man had given them over the past year and a bit. Forced to do so or not, Draco was still not going to be grateful to the man for them.

"Why Mister Malfoy, I am delivering your trunks of course, along with food parcels from Mrs. Weasley, and a care package from the Weasley twins."

"Noooooo!" Screamed both Lily and Sirius from their seats having figured out that that was the origin of their hair problems the previous morning.

"Oh Remus, can you tell us where Ginny is? Pleas I don't know what you guys have done with her." Harry said urgently. Across the room, every Marauder or sort of Marauder stiffened. This was crunch time for Remus' tentative place in their group.

The ex-marauder sighed.

"I would Harry, but after the message Bill gave about me, junior me promised not to give away any of the plans if my (or his I guess I should say) visit came up at such a time. You know that I am a man of my word Harry so I cannot go against that."

"It's okay Remus; I wouldn't expect you to break a promise." Harry said as across the room junior Remus gave a whoop of joy and ran around in circles since this confirmed him as a permanent Marauder.

"Okay, apart from those trifles, I have some stuff I need to go over with you. Firstly, Pansy, this is for you." Remus handed the girl a small box that all three time travelers immediately recognized.

"Thank you Remus." Pansy whispered, shy all of a sudden.

"No problem sweetheart. Secondly, and I apologise for this, but we must talk politics. Albus, do you have a completely isolated room we could borrow for… oh, maybe fifteen minutes?"

The aging Headmaster nodded and rose to direct them to whichever room he had in mind. Draco turned to look at Severus who was watching from a slight distance.

"Sev, I'm sorry but this is important and we can't reveal this part of the future to anyone. Please understand this. Could you keep looking for Ginny while we are gone?" Draco asked and the other boy nodded in acceptance.

"Come one Dray!" Harry called from outside the side door where he and the other three had already exited. The blonde smiled at Severus before running out of the hall.

Severus blinked a few times and then watched as the whole hall filled with whispering as they tried to figure out what was so important. Severus pushed these thoughts aside however and concentrated on the task at hand. He had a red-head to find.

As it turned out he did not have to look very far since only minutes after the others had left, the main doors burst open.

"I AM GOING TO SLAUGHTER YOU MARAUDER ARSES YOU FUCKED UP SONS OF BITCHES!" came a scream from what appeared to be an irate red-head. One could not be sure that this was what it was however since something serious had gone wrong with the things appearance.

There was silence momentarily before Sirius could be heard muttering;

"Harry was scarier."

And then pandemonium broke out again. Professor Pandino however, seemed to have no problem identifying the newest arrival to the great hall.

"5 points from Gryffindor for your disgusting language Miss Weasley." He snapped over the confusion.

"Disgusting- my disgusting language? You're punishing me for language? I just woke up on a raft in the middle of the fucking lake for Merlin's sake! I had no paddle, was wearing a ridiculously flimsy bikini and a life jacket, and sitting next to an unbreakable and working muggle record player which was repetitively playing "The Song that Doesn't End". Then, I finally decide that I cannot take it anymore and started swimming back and what do you know? The fucking raft disappears and it turns out the record player can swim!" Ginny practically bellowed. Around her, several people who knew the song gave a sympathetic shudder. Well, except for the Billster.

"Hey, I know that song! Some people started singing it not knowing what it was,

And they continued singing it for ever just because; it was the song that doesn't MMPH!"

Everyone looked grateful as Severus, who had just reached Ginny and had grabbed hold of the boy and slapped a hand over his mouth. Severus then maneuvered the Billster around so they were both facing Ginny and thus proceeded to give her a look over to make sure she was not physically injured. She was covered in mud and slime with some sort of plant life hanging over one eye. Her hair was worse now then it had ever been before, even after her unfortunate landing upon her arrival in 1977. Out of the corner of his eye, Severus could see Lily smirking triumphantly. Ginny was also wearing what Severus supposed had previously been a blue bikini and was swamped by an oversized orange life jacket.

"Sweet Merlin girl, have you seen a mirror yet?" Severus had never been one for tact.

Ginny seemed to swell up like a balloon before deflating and simply glaring at the boy carrying her brother.

"You are very lucky I'm more interested in revenge then I am at countering insults Mister Snape. As it is, we require a planning session and I don't care who knows it. Where are the others?" Ginny said in one breath.

Tearing Severus' hand away from his mouth, the Billster was the one to answer Ginny's question.

"An older version of the Remster came up over there and they all went off with him." The boy informed her, puffing out his chest with self importance as he said it.

Ginny froze and looked around the room with a slightly shocked expression.

"Do you mean to tell me that not only did I just swim a hell of a long distance through squid infested waters with a self propelled record player following me, get covered in slime and muck, and wear a ridiculously skimpy outfit… and also managed to miss Remus' visit?" The whole hall nodded with the exception of James who made to correct her.

"Actually it wasn't a self propelled record player; it was a record player resting atop of a double powered super sonic steam propelled monkey explosive tank death mobile of doom." Harry's future father informed them all.

Ginny blinked momentarily.

"A what?"

"A record player resting atop of a double powered super sonic steam propelled monkey explosive tank death mobile of DOOM of course." James repeated himself with an exasperated look. Ginny glared at him.

"I don't care what it was, it was evil. Evil I tell you!" Ginny started screaming again.

"Look Ginny, maybe you should calm down a little. I mean-" Severus paused as he heard something.

"What?" The Billster asked, twisting around in the boy's arms to look up at him, "What?"

It was then that they all heard it, drifting down the corridors of Hogwarts, out of sight but getting clearer, the familiar lyrics.

"Oh no!" Ginny whispered.

"Some people started singing it not knowing what it was,

And they continued singing it for ever just because;

It was the song that doesn't end

And it goes on and on my friend

Be-cause-some

People started singing it not knowing what it was,

And they continued sing-"

"Save meeeeee!" Ginny wailed and sprinted out of the hall, laughter following her the whole way.

Okay that was it people. Thank you for reading. While I expect you're all too mad at me for the time lapse to be bothered reviewing; please review anyway since if you take a look at how often I've updated AS as compared to this one lately, and then look at the review count… I'm sure you can make the connection. Please send ideas for Lily's marauder name.

LOST:

One Fan Fiction.

Featuring a Harry/Severus pairing, this story follows a plot where James and Lily never died, but simply moved to Australia (I think), leaving Harry to his fate. When they return they are upset with his choice of relationships. Sirius is alive btw.

If found, please PM or Review with story name or author name. Reward offered! No questions asked!

Will accept something similar and equally enjoyable as a replacement.