/N I would like to start this chapter with a quote from Hellbent, the inspiration for my story.

"Olaf reluctantly submitted to Clarence's examination. Clarence looked closely at the bite, if it was a bite. "Nasty. We're going to have to lance this. Stand back." With no further ado the devil chopped down on Olaf's neck with his machete. The lump split neatly and out popped and ugly dwarfish little man, who scuttled gleefully off into the undergrowth. There then followed a bat, two toads, a length of barbed wire, a toy fire appliance, a large hairy spider, a cardigan, and a packet of vanilla pudding. With each new birth Olaf emitter a resigned "Oeph." –Chapter 23, PG 155, paragraph 6.

Literally In Hell With: Draco Malfoy

Chapter 4

Home sweet, Ouch!

So there they were back in the city. After making the dreadful travel three times more, Hermione and Draco where finally at what they would be calling home. Oh what a home it was. One room, one muggle kitchen, one TV, and one bed where the only objects in the room

Draco stood standing in front of the TV. Hermione wanted to look at the kitchen but found herself too in front of the TV. "What is it?"

"A tube," Hermione said. "You watch images on it."

"How?"

"Turn it on."

Draco bent down and Hermione followed. He starred at the TV. "How?" He repeated once again.

Hermione sighed. "You have to turn the knob."

"What knob?"

Hermione looked at the old television. There were no knobs to turn. Hermione let out a small insane laugh. It was funny because their only source of entertainment wouldn't turn on. If they thought Hermione would be miserable in a place like this she would prove them wrong. Hermione stood up and Draco let out a loud "yelp!" Draco jumped up with Hermione. "Can you warn me when you do that?"

"No," Hermione snapped, "Because I'm sure you won't warn me."

Draco frowned. "Yes I would not but at least if you warned me one of us wouldn't be tormented."

"You enjoy seeing me miserable."

Draco nodded his head. "Are you hungry?"

"Not particularly." Then Hermione heard her stomach grumble. Okay so she was hungry, she hadn't noticed it until Draco had to say something. Her stomach let out another rumble. Well she wasn't just hungry she was starving.

"Well to bad," Draco said pushing past Hermione. "I am so you are going to cook for me." Draco dragged Hermione over to the small refrigerator and opened the door. It was filled with wondrous food. Draco's mouth drooled with anticipation.

"I'm not cooking for you," Hermione stated.

"Oh but you are," Draco grinned. "Because I am stronger then you and I will not move until I get what I want."

At first Hermione tried moving away from Draco. She thought that maybe in hell where all people where punished maybe she would get super human strength to knock over Draco. She wrong Draco would not budge no matter how hard she had pushed.

"Give up?" Draco grinned.

Hermione glared at him and turned back to the food in the mini refrigerator. At least they had good food down in Hell. Hermione picked up a juicy stake and took out a pan. Good thing her parent's where muggles otherwise she would have no idea how to work the stove.

The stove turned on and Hermione threw the pan along with the steak onto the fire. She searched the rotting cabinets for spices. There she found some pepper and salt. She sprinkled the two on and waited for the steak to cook. The aroma from the steak filled the air and it seemed like both of them where blessed with a little bit of heaven. At last Hermione turned of the stove and let the steak cool.

There where no plates so Hermione just handed Draco the pan. "Enjoy," Hermione said enviously. Draco grabbed the pan away from Hermione and began to dig in. Suddenly Draco spit out the steak he was eating.

"What the bloody hell…" Draco said looking down at the pan.

Hermione covered her mouth when she saw what was in it. There was no longer the smell of freshly cooked meat but the stench of rotting shit. The steak was filled with crap, literally. Draco threw the steak down on the counter and starred at it.

"I just ate shit!"

Hermione giggled. "You just ate shit."

Draco glared at her. "Oh I bet you find it funny now, just wait until you have to eat it!"

Hermione frowned. "Who says I have to eat it?"

It was Draco's turn to laugh. "Well it's pretty obvious what they did. They brought our hopes up of a decent meal then smashed it back down with shit. Do you really think there is any good food in Hell? For god's sake Granger we're in Hell!"

"You may be right," Hermione said knowing this would annoy Draco.

"May be right? Of course I am! I mean how nice can Hell actually be?" Draco looked at the bed that lied in the corner of the room. It wasn't really what you would call a bed; a mattress would be more like it. A moldy one if you want to be really descriptive.

Draco continued to stare at the bed. It looked gross but it seemed like his only salvation. The only thing was if he was to lie down in it Hermione be lying next to him. Gross. On the other hand all Draco needed was a break. He was tired it overwhelmed his fear of being in the same bed with a mudblood.

Draco dragged Hermione over to the bed and flopped himself on it dragging Hermione with him. Both let out terrifying squeals. Draco looked at his stomach and saw a metal spike going threw it. He could feel the cold metal inside of him and could of sworn he had one threw his head. It had to be the reason why he couldn't turn to see if Hermione suffered from the same fate.

He was sure she did though. The scream she let out was more terrifying then seeing the spike threw his stomach. "Damn," Draco said out loud, "They got us."

"Snuff it you git."

As the pain started to fade Draco knew he was going to die. Well at least that was what he thought. The pain faded and they where still stuck there, on the bed. Hours maybe days or even years had past by and still they did not die.

"I thought we could die in Hell," Hermione said.

"Maybe the leprechaun was lying to us," Draco said, "Well I know we did die two times while trying to get here but I mean maybe that part is just a game, like the worst part about getting here was having to do it over and over and over again. So now that that's over with we are stuck here never dying."

"What are you trying to say?"

"I think we need to push ourselves off of the stakes."

"You're mad. Do you know how much that would hurt?"

"Well do you want to spend your life on this mattress?"

"What life? I'm dead!" Hermione grunted.

"Well I'm getting out." Draco put his hands to the side of him and began to push. The pain he felt was unbearable and he had to stop almost every half-inch. Imagine having your insides ripped out over and over again, well this felt nothing like that. At last there was only about three more inches to go. Draco pushed up really hard and flew himself off of the spike.

Draco regained his balance in the process almost falling back onto the spikes. Boy would that have sucked. Draco turned his attention on to Hermione. "Your turn," he said.

"If you touch me…" Hermione started.

"What? Are you going to kill me?" Draco felt his insides began to itch. He was healing, bugger. Draco took Hermione's hands and started to pull her up.

Hermione let out a loud high pitch scream. "Stop! It hurt's!"

"Stop moving! You're going to cause me to slip!" Draco snapped, but it was too late. Draco found himself falling back on the bed directly on top of Hermione. "Bloody bitch," Draco groaned. "You just made this whole situation awkward."

"I can't believe you're thinking about awkwardness while you have spikes going threw your body!"

"Ah you get used to it after a while."

Hermione let out a loud groan of annoyance. "I hate you."

"Same here darling," Draco said.

Draco went through the same process as the last time except this time he was on his stomach. Once Draco was off of the bed without warning he pulled Hermione up. Hermione flew up smack into Draco causing both of them to fall to the floor.

"Ouch," Hermione said.

"Yeah ouch."

A/N I hope you like it so far! Please, please, please review!