Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. See I'm so tired of disclaimers that I can't even make it seem somewhat witty.

After finishing his twelve bowls of ramen, Naruto went of in search of Shikamaru. 'This is so easy! Kakashi-sensai will think I'm an amazing ninja after this! I won't even have to move! Believe it!' Naruto thought. He walked past the flower store where Ino was helping out her mom. 'Sakura's got it easy too, Ino's just going to be sitting at that counter for the next three hours at least.' While Naruto was lost in his thoughts, a small potted plant came flying out of the shop door, grazing Naruto's shoulder. "Hey! What was that for?!" Naruto yelled into the shop.

"That, Naruto, was for spying on my team earlier today. If your sensai hadn't made me come back to my body I'd have known why you were there!" Ino shouted from the counter.

"HA!" Naruto began before a larger pot of cosmos were thrown, hitting him square in the face, "ARG!" Naruto ducked around the wall, holding his face, which was now cut and bleeding slightly. 'Enough messing around, I've got work to do.'

Several minutes later Naruto found Shikamaru lounging in the shade of a large oak tree. His eyes were closed and his legs stretched out. He was apparently asleep. 'Alright, he's asleep! This'll be a cinch. I'll just jot down how many times he breathes, snores, or rolls over! BELIEVE IT!' Naruto thought happily. He stretched out behind a patch of bushes, flipped open his notebook and grabbed his pen. After scribbling down Shikamaru's name on the top of the page, he began to observe.

Nara Shikamaru

Scratches leg

Opens eyes lazily

Scratches cheek

Looks around suspiciously

Yawns

Sighs

Arches fingers together 'Wait… why on Earth does he do that?'

Makes numerous hand-signs…

Got outsmarted by Shikamaru the great

Got caught by the Shadow Possession Jutsu

Because Naruto is the biggest loser in all of Konoha

Unfortunately by this time you realize that Naruto only got to watch Shikamaru for about five minutes before getting taken over by the jutsu, right?

"So Naruto, what should I do to a freaky little spy?" 'Uhh… this is such a drag…' "I think that anyone dumb enough to get caught by a SLEEPING ninja should get reported to their sensai, don't you think so?"

"OH NO! YOU CAN'T TELL KAKASHI-SENSAI I WAS CAUGHT! YOU JUST CAN'T!" Naruto begged.

"Oh, you don't want your sensai to know that you're a creep! Watching me sleep like that, it's just weird." Shikamaru said, "Well then I suppose I should give you a punishment of my own."

"So what are you gonna do Shikamaru?" 'Probably fetch him a drink, that lazy jerk.' Shikamaru just laughed and started to back up. Since Naruto was under the shadow possession jutsu, he too was backing up. After about ten steps Naruto felt his back against a tree. His feet then turned themselves so he was facing the trees, his face just inches from the rough bark. Shikamaru pulled his head back and then snapped his head forward, over and over and over again. Naruto did the exact same thing, but instead of facing the air, he was facing a huge tree.

"OUCH! ARG! STOP THAT! GRR! YOU- OWCH!" Naruto cried out painfully. Blood was beginning to run down his forehead. Finally after about three minutes he was out cold.

"Ha, that'll teach you to mess around with my day off." Shikamaru scoffed at the unconscious heap, "see ya later, loser!"

Naruto awoke several hours later, his head throbbing painfully. "Aw geez, even HE outsmarted me, and he was ASLEEP!" Naruto said to the approaching night. He was about to give up and return to Kakashi-sensai defeated, but something was bothering him. He sensed something.

"You know you're going about this all wrong." A faint feather-like voice said, "you need serious help, Naruto."

"WHO SAID THAT? COME OUT!" Naruto shouted. He was afraid that he lost too much blood and was going crazy, "ARE YOU SURE YOU'RE NOT JUST PART OF MY IMAGINATION?"

"Um… yea… Naruto, you're new to the world of elite stalking, aren't you? Well I can help you with the techniques you need." The voice continued.

"WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE? TALKING DOWN TO ME LIKE YOU'RE SOMEONE SPECIAL? DON'T YOU KNOW WHO I AM?"

"Of course I do Naruto, I know you better than most people." The voice said, belonging to a figure that was emerging from behind a tree, "you've helped me many times before, so now it's my turn to help you." It was Hinata.

Naruto was blown away, 'HINATA?! How on Earth does she know so much about stalking? She knows me better than most people? What is she talking about.' It hit him. "Hinata, I know this is kind of a weird question, but do you stalk me?"

Hinata sweat dropped. 'He didn't know I stalked him? Is he blind or something?' "Let's just say I know where you hang out." She said, blushing fiercely.

"Okay, that's kinda weird but whatever floats your boat right? You said that you could help me learn how to stalk?" Naruto asked.

"Yes, I can help you Naruto. But to succeed you will have to follow my every instruction."

It's amazing how Shikamaru has an IQ of like 200, yet he couldn't think of anything better to do with Naruto! (hehe oops.)