Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.
Sasuke was walking down the street, Gaara leading him down many dark alleys and over rooftops.
"Where are you taking me, to your evil lair? Sasuke growled.
"Just be quiet! I'm taking you to get some help, or else you'll never learn how to stalk!" Gaara shouted back. Sasuke just glared Gaara, trying to act uncaring, but he was blushing. After about ten minutes of running, jumping and climbing, they arrived.
"Hey isn't this the place where Naruto buys ramen all the time?" Sasuke asked.
"Naruto? How should I know?" Gaara replied. 'Idiot.' They approached the Ichiraka Ramen house, but instead of going through the front entrance, they went around back.
'Where is this freak taking me? We have been all around Konoha and then come to a place like this? I bet this is where he stores all the bodies of the people he's killed.' Sasuke thought, acting rather paranoid. Gaara walked silently to a small slit in the wall and whispered, "Hai! Konoha Raka!" A hidden door swung open. Gaara beckoned Sasuke inside. "Quickly, quickly, we can't have anyone know of this place." Sasuke followed, wary.
They entered a huge room, a hidden portion of the ramen shop. There were numerous booths, all filled with criminals, fellow ninjas and respected ninja. "Geez! There are murders and felons here, why doesn't anyone do anything?!" Sasuke practically shouted. All heads spun around to look at the imbecile who insulted them. "Oh… um, hi everyone… I was just…" Sasuke slunk down into a chair, attempting to hide his embarrassment.
"You know, you really have to work on your people skills." Gaara said, sipping some strange liquid. Sasuke grumbled.
"So how is being in this ridiculous bar going to help me stalk people!?" Sasuke spat.
"Tsk tsk. You don't know me at all, do you?" Gaara said, taking a seat. Gaara turned to face the rest of the bar, "THIS PUNK HERE DOESN'T THINK I KNOW HOW TO STALK!" The whole bar burst into fits of laughter. Sasuke just stared in amazement. Suddenly, the door swung open again, revealing an all too familiar face. It was Tsunade, the Hokage. 'What on Earth is she doing showing her face here again?' Gaara thought. The whole room went silent. Tsunade had a dark look on her face, and Shizune was trailing her, passing a large number of bills into Tsunade's outstretched hand. The old man at the counter had huge money signs in his eyes as he prepared the sake. Tsunade took a seat next to Gaara, completely oblivious to his stares. Gaara cleared his throat, "hello, Tsunade, long time no see." He had a devilish grin on his face, and when Tsunade turned to look at him, she practically fainted.
"Yo-you… I thought you were gone…" Tsunade stuttered, eyes wide. 'Oh no… not that kid again… I haven't seen him since…'
Flashback
Tsunade was walking home from a lecture on the medical potential of chakra. She was tired of these late night presentations, she just wanted to sleep. She was walking down the street when something caught her eye. Out of her peripheral vision was a flash of red. She spun around, searching for the source, but all that remained was a small, fist sized figurine shaped like a gourd. She approached the statue with caution, searching for explosives and whatnot. Her hand reached out to touch it, though when she did it collapsed into a small pile of sand. 'Hmm… how odd,' Strange occurrences weren't uncommon, so she continued on, thinking nothing of it.
About two blocks later a small boy appeared in an alley to her right. She spun around, thinking she'd finally catch the prankster, but like the first time, nothing remained but a gourd statue. She lashed out at it in anger, but it just turned to sand. Angrily Tsunade stomped down towards her home, making threats to the kid who was behind this. Just as she put her hand on the doorknob, she saw the same kid through the window in her house. She smashed the door open, and sprinted to the window. All that remained were five gourds. They were multiplying. She tried to hit them with a blast of chakra, but they just became sand.
Tsunade ran to her bathroom. She rinsed her face, thinking she was crazy. 'I gotta get out of here,' but just as she dried her face off, the boy was there again, behind her with a devilish grin. Tsunade spun around, and she felt her fist collide with something, 'got him, WHAT!' The boy was gone, all that was there was a huge pile of sand.
Tsunade ran around her house in a crazed fury, knocking over statue after statue, creating waves and waves of sand. Tsunade just looked at it all then walked over to her kitchen. She took out the large bottle of alcohol, and chugged it. Then she went to her storage closet, and got a bucket and spade.
End Flashback
"Have you come back to haunt me, Gaara?" Tsunade said, her lips trembling.
"Ha, don't you worry Tsunade, I'm retired!" Gaara said, and then passed a drink on to her. "I'm going to teach this one here all I know!" He said, slapping Sasuke on the back, making him choke on his food. 'I'm going to figure out what his sensai was planning, teaching them how to stalk. This is going to get interesting.'
Ha, poor Tsunade. I hope you don't mind I made her a crazy drunk! It's not all that far from the truth. And I apologize for spelling errors... yadeeyada... Thanks for reading! Please review!!