MY DAYz WERE BETTER WHEN YOU WERE WITH ME...

Sweet Escape

I thought about having Alexander put away but I didn't go to the authorities because Alexander was half-vampire and either wouldn't allow the police to take him in, or he would brake out later using his vampire strength. Also I was afraid that if I tried to have him put away he would come after me. That didn't sound to appealing. He was never the violent type so I am not sure if he would actually kill me, but he was never the rapist type either and that didn't turn out so good.

I often thought about how it would be if he came back for me. There is no telling what he would do next time. I had to admit, I was afraid. I was never afraid of him before, he had given me no reason to be. Well, the old Alexander had given me no reason to be. The new Alexander, I wasn't really sure what to expect from him. If he could do that there is no telling what he would do the next time if he got a hold of me. To stay safe and hopefully forget as well, I knew what I had to do; I had to leave ASAP.

I knew I couldn't stay in that house anymore, so I asked if it would be ok if I moved from Seattle to Forks to live with my father, Charlie. When my Mother and her husband Phil asked 'why?' I simply told them that Alexander and I had broken up and that I needed to get away for a while. It was slightly true I guess, I was definitely trying to get away but about the whole broken up part, I wasn't sure. How could we be together after what he did? I thought about how much hurt he had caused me but I also thought about how much I missed him and wasn't sure if my will power was strong enough for me to stay away from him. Reluctantly, my Mother agreed and called Charlie to make sure that it was ok for me to live with him for a little while. He was happy considering I hadn't seen him in months. I called often but never really visited.

My flight was scheduled to leave a week after school let out. It was the beginning of June and I only had two days of classes left. I was afraid to go to school but I had to go in order to take my final exams, if I didn't I wouldn't pass junior year. I would not get kept back, that was out of the question. I would just have to deal with Alexander if I happen to see him.

Luckily I didn't see Alexander at school. I was grateful that he wasn't there because I was afraid I couldn't handle seeing him. Like if I saw him I would immediately break down I secretly missed him, The sweet sensitive Alexander I knew. The one who would hold me while I cried during sad movies and tell me that everything was going to be alright. Or the Alexander that could make me laugh so easily when I was having a bad day.

The following week I was driven to the airport by my mother. She told me the whole way there "remember, you don't have to stay if you don't want to. You can come back when ever your ready."

When I'm ready huh? I didn't think I would ever be ready, that house held a memory that I wished to no longer have, I couldn't face it. That was why I was moving to Forks in the first place, so I could get away and never come back.. I left so I could move on and not be confronted by the pass. I know it makes me seem like a coward, but running seemed like the right thing to do. I wanted a fresh start, one that Forks would give me. Dealing with excessive rain was a small price I'd have to pay in order to forget.

The plane ride was uneventful. I listened to my ipod the entire way and consumed a massive amount of coke, so I wouldn't sleep. I had to stay awake so I wouldn't be faced with the nightmares that threatened to invade my sleep. I couldn't handle sleeping because my dreams scared me too much. The last thing I needed was to scream on a plane full of passengers. Every time I slept I would vividly remember that night. The look in his eyes, even in my dream, was the same as that night. I was scared to the very depths of my soul by his eyes that night. They were different somehow, almost emotionless, not the adoring eyes I had grown to love. I can't quite tell you what it was, but something was missing from his eyes. They looked almost demonic, not the Angelic eyes that I loved gettin' lost in.

Charlie was waiting for me when my plane landed. Just as I had expected he had the police cruiser. I definitely need to get a car of my own I thought to myself as I climbed into the passenger seat. The ride home was kind of awkward, Charlie tried the "small talk" thing but failed miserably at it. He asked me how school was going I said 'alright'. he told me that I would love living in Forks again I just answered with 'alright'. he got tired of my one-word answers and stopped trying. I felt bad but I couldn't help it. I would have been a better passenger had I not still been sad about Alexander, thinking of him tore at my heart, I wondered why he had done that. He never showed any signs of being that type of person.

He was always so sweet and would tell me he loved me constantly. One of my favorite memories of us was one day when he took me to his house to meet his mother. She was a nice woman, and excepted me warmly. I have to admit I didn't expect that from her, I don't know why but I didn't think she would be too happy about me knowing her sons secret but she was happy that he was happy, just like my mother had been with me.

anyway, we had been sitting on his porch, swinging on his porch swing and not saying a word, just enjoying each others company when he broke the silence with "sweety, I want you to know that I would never hurt you I love you for all of eternity" I'll admit that it was rather random, but it pleased me anyway. I searched his eyes deeply and saw no hint of lies, I only saw adoration and love. I knew he meant every word. I knew that he loved me. He knew that I loved him. We were happy, so WHY did he have to ruin it? He wasn't like that before, he never showed interest in anything other than being in my company. I can't believe he threw away everything that we had worked so hard on. We should have been able to spend the rest of our days together, happy. What makes me feel so bad though is that even though he had taken away my innocence and violated me beyond comprehension, I still missed him a great deal. Forks will help I told myself. It will help me forget and move on.