(A/N : THANK YOU ALL OF MY LOVELY REVIEWERS I LUV U GUYz... AND IF THIS CHAP UPSETS U READ THE ENGING A/N)

I JUST WANT TO HEAR SOMEONE TELLIN' ME THAT IT ISN'T MY FAULT...

Hospital

(two and a half months later...)

The last two months I did absolutely nothing but think of Alexander, cry, and then scold myself immediately after. I tried so hard to get him off of my mind but I can't. I still miss him, so very much. It shouldn't be this hard to forget him, but it is. And to add to it I think I'm getting sick. Yay me!! Sarcasm

I woke up this morning and had to throw up, again. I've thrown up every morning this entire week. Lucky for me Charlie is at work every time I have to run out of my room to the bathroom. I don't want him to question me or get all parental and try to take care of me. I don't know what could be causing this sickness ? I thought to myself just before it hit me I couldn't be pregnant, could I? OMG! That was the last thought I had before I called the hospitalto make an appointment.

I became increasingly nervous as I entered the Forks Medical parking lot. I was nervous the entire drive but pulling into the parking lot made it a lot worse. What if I am pregnant? I couldn't get rid of the baby, that was out of the question. I had to keep it, But what would I tell my parents? I couldn't tell them the truth, that I had been sexually assaulted by Alexander, but I didn't want them to think that I was the kind of girl who had sex with just anybody because I wasn't like that, and I couldn't stand for them to be ashamed of me. A million questions ran through my mind as I walked up to the front desk to inform them that their three o'clock had arrived.

"Go to room three and the doctor will be in there shortly" said the woman behind the counter in a nasally voice that made my skin crawl. She acted as if she was beyond annoyed and couldn't wait to get out of the hospital, but that was the least of my worries. What I had to think of now was what I would do if I was pregnant. Maybe I could tell them that I had a random fling and I got pregnant. I know it sounds bad but its better than the truth right? Im so confused, I don't know what to do.

Just as I was running scenarios through my head of what could happen the doctor walked in. He was young, blond and handsomer than any movie star I had every seen. His silk voice brought me out of gawking.

"So, Miss Swan im doctor Cullen, and what seems to be the problem?"

"I feel sick and tired and I can not stop vomiting" I explained without looking at him.

"mmmmh" he muttered, seeming deep in thought "any chance you might be pregnant?" he asked slowly.

"I think I might be" I admitted still looking down. I knew how it looked, like I had sex and was facing the results. But it was so much worse than that.

"Its ok, your not the only teenager who may be pregnant , there is no need to feel ashamed" he said soothingly. If only I could tell him that I wasn't ashamed that I was pregnant, but ashamed of the way I got pregnant, if I even was pregnant. I still didn't know.

Much to my displeasure, he drew blood to confirm if I was pregnant or not. I felt dizzy but was way too anxious to pass out. I had to fight with myself to keep my eyes open, the conscience side won. He left, coming back awhile later saying enthusiastically "congratulations Miss Swan you're pregnant! "

I sat for a few seconds and tried to keep myself calm, but as I thought about how much those simple five words could change my life I couldn't hold it in any longer, I put my head in my hands and I began to cry. I didn't know what to do, I felt trapped. I knew Dr. Cullen most likely thought I was crazy but I didn't care, crying made me feel better, like I was releasing all the pain and burdens. I felt a cold hand on my shoulder but I couldn't look up I was too upset.

"Is it that your pregnant? There are ways to fix that, have you considered abortion or adoption?" he said in a very professional voice.

I looked up then, there was no way I was going to give up my baby, what kind of mother would I be if I did that? It wasn't my babies fault that it's father was an asshole. I couldn't do that to my baby. He or She didn't deserve that at all.

If it wasn't for that fact that I was raped I would have been extremely excited. Alexander and I often talked about parenthood. We had planned out our entire lives including child birth, if it was a boy we would name him Alexander, after his dad obviously. If it was a girl however, we would name her Nanette. I don't know why but it was always a name I loved.

"It's not that im pregnant, im happy im pregnant, a little, its just that..." I trailed off, taking a deep breath and realizing what I was about to confess. I couldn't even bring myself to tell my own parents, how could I tell a doctor I just met. Then he would most likely want to do the whole 'rape kit' thing and I didn't want to have to go through all that.

"It's just that what?" he asked "I can help you, I am a doctor, after all" he continued

"I don't think you want to know" I said looking into his golden eyes wishing he could understand like Alexander had always been able to. I just wanted to let go of the past, let go of Alexander and... wait a minute, his eyes are golden, that means he is a animal drinking vampire. The inhuman beauty, the cold skin, the gold eyes, the purple bruises under his eyes I should have noticed sooner but I was too preoccupied with the fear of being pregnant. My curiosity got the best of me and before I could think about what I was saying I blurted out " how can you stand to be around so much blood without wanting to drink it?"

He looked confused for a moment, but then realizing what I meant he asked "you know what I am don't you?" he said it more like a statement rather than a question but

I nodded anyway and replied "don't worry your secret is safe with me, your not the first vampire I've met" I smiled slightly.

"how?" he asked "how do you know what I am" he continued curiously.

"well, the babies father is a half-vampire" I replied I didn't want to say my ex boyfriend, for some reason that felt wrong and I wasn't ready to stop loving him, although I'm sure he stopped loving me. I touched the ring he had given me subconsciously. It was still on my finger, I wasn't ready, not yet, I couldn't let him go. Noticing this Dr. Cullen replied "ah, yes, and where is this young man?" with a smile on his face. He must have thought we were engaged or something.

" I don't know" I looked down ashamed. His smile faded

"Im sor-" he started but I cut him off

"its alright Dr. Cullen"

"and please call me Carlisle"

"alright, Carlisle" I smiled despite the situation

"listen, may I call you Isabella?"

"Of course"

"then Isabella, I'm not sure if it is best that you come to the hospital for your medical care seeing as how your child may display some vampiric qualities, I get off of work in about half an hour if you wouldn't mind waiting I'd like to take you to my home for further evaluation"

"I don't mind" I said. I would love to know about this baby and how to take care of it in case it does display vampiric qualities. A vampire doctor, is there a better person to get advice from? The half an hour went by quickly while I thought about how to handle this. By the time he was ready to leave I still didn't know what to do.

The ride to his house didn't take long. I followed in my red truck that was given to my by Charlie as a 'welcome home' gift. His house was magnificent. The house was timeless, graceful, and probably a hundred years old. Wow how rich is he? I thought to myself as I looked at the size.

His car came to stop in front of me and I parked my truck behind him. He got out of his vehicle and I got out of mine following him inside.

"Allow me to introduce you to my family" and no sooner than he said that, six vampires walked out of what I guess was the family room.

"This is Alice" he began pointing to a short pixie-like girl with short black hair who had the biggest smile I had ever seen in my life, on her face.

"Jasper" he continued pointing to a boy next to Alice, he was lean with honey blond hair, he nodded politely.

"Emmet" he went on pointing to a boy with dark curly hair. He was huge, I mean serious weightlifter huge. I was instantly intimidated by his size, but his friendly smile made me feel more at ease.

"Rosalie" he pointed to a breathe taking blond girl. She waved shyly and I did the same.

"Edward" he pointed to a boy that was lanky with untidy bronze colored hair. He was gorgeous. He was different somehow, his eyes I decided was the difference. The held a depth to them that I was immediately captured in. I felt a force calling me to him, it was very subtle, but I noticed it. I couldn't help but wonder why it reminded me of the first time I met Alexander. They were all inhumanly beautiful but he was by far the most handsome.

"And last but not least, my wife. Esme" she hugged me in a motherly manner and made me feel very welcome.

They all smiled and waved but I could see the curiosity burning deep within their eyes. I know that they were wondering what this human girl could be doing here. I could tell Carlisle noticed too because he quickly explained

"she is pregnant with the child of a half-vampire so I brought her here for an exam"

"ohh" they all replied in unison. I noticed, but only for I second, that right after Carlisle said that Edward glare at Alice.

It was getting a bit awkward so I decided to speak

" its nice to meet all of you, you have a very beautiful home"

"we are so glad that you could come" replied Carlisles wife, Esme.

Then the short one, Alice I think was her name, hugged me. It was so sudden I was sure my heart stopped in surprise. But once I realized she was hugging me I returned her hug, but with less enthusiasm. It was impossible not to return her hug. She seemed so innocent and sweet I couldn't help but feel like we had known each other for an eternity. Once she released me she gave me a very friendly smile but I could see mischief brimming behind her eyes as she said " I saw you coming, congratulations by the way"

"thank you" I replied although I wasn't quite sure what she meant by 'I saw you coming'

she must have seen the confusion on my face because she went on "I'm a physic "

"oh" I replied understanding. Alexander once told me about how some vampires have certain gifts above the norm for their kind. But he never did know why it happened. He himself didn't have any but his father was a fire starter.

Carlisle led me up the stairs to his office. I grew nervous of what he would tell me. What if my baby was part vampire, I didn't know how to take care of a vampire baby. What if it needs blood? How am I to get something like that? I was taken out of my thoughts by Carlisle telling me " please take a seat" as we entered his office.

I did as I was told and sat down on the other side of the desk that he was sitting at.

" I would like to run some tests if that is alright" he began "I want to make sure that this baby is healthy and I will be able to tell you if this child is human or not, if you would like to know" of course !!!

I nodded eagerly, that was something that had been bothering me ever since I found out that I was pregnant.

"Would you like an ultrasound?" Carlisle asked after numerous test. I wasn't quite sure what he was doing but for some reason I trusted him.

"Yes I would, very much" I replied. I really wanted to know if it was a boy or a girl. I would love my baby no matter what but I was curious.

"Ok I'm going to need to take you to the basement because the required equipment is down there, alright?"he asked

I stood up as a reply. My curiosity was eating away at me. I wanted to know the sex of this baby so badly.

When I looked at the ultrasound screen I couldn't stop the tears from flowing.I was happy because I looked onto the screen and saw the most beautiful thing I've ever seen; my beautiful, human baby girl. But at the same time I couldn't help but think how this child's life would be without a father. That saddened me, the fact that I couldn't produce a happy family for my baby.But I couldn't tell Alexander, even if I wanted to, I had no idea where he was. And as much as I hate admitting it I missed him. The old him. The him I fell in love with. That just made more tears come and roll down my cheeks. Carlisle put a comforting hand on my shoulder, for the second time today making me think I really have to get a grip in my emotions, maybe it's the pregnancy making me so emotional.

"I'm sorry Carlisle, its just a lot to take in" I said wiping my eyes.

"its alright, your not the first pregnant woman to cry at the sight of her ultrasound"

I smiled slightly, finding comfort in his words. He was really good at comforting patients.

After that Carlisle and I talked a little of what I should and should not do to keep my baby girl healthy, just basic stuff, like when to feed and change her.After thanking him and saying goodbye I walked downstairs to leave but was stopped by Alice. She had the most heartbreaking look on her face, like she would be crying if it were possible for a vampire.

"Are you alright?" I asked worried.

"the better question is are you?" she responded. I was more than a little confused by that remark so I waited for her to continue " I know what he did to you, normally I only get premonitionsbut for some reason this time I was able to see the past, and I know what your boyfriend did to you, I saw it and I'm so sorry" she finished, looking at me as if to judge my reaction. I was shocked to say the least. I didn't want anyone to know, especially someone I had just met. I didn't know what to say, I was at a lost for words. So I did the only thing I could think of, I began to plead

" please Alice, I'm begging you, don't tell anyone" just then Emmet walked in the room asking " don't tell anyone what?" I looked at Alice, afraid that she would tell Emmet

"nothing that is of your concern Emmet" she replied. I gave I sigh of relief, I really didn't want anyone else to know. Alice looked at me sadly for a moment before hugging me and whispering

"don't worry, everything will work out in your favor, I promise" then she kissed my cheek and gracefully walked away. I left their house thinking my entire trip home I thought I hope she's right.

When I got home I made dinner, I knew Charlie couldn't cook and demanded that he allow me to do so for the duration of my stay. I wasn't in the mood for anything too fancy so I just made some baked chicken and pasta. Charlie came home around an hour after I did and I could see that he was exhausted and was grateful I made dinner. Dinner was uneventful until Charlie asked what I did

"I read a new book today" I lied. I wasn't ready to tell him about the pregnancy. I was afraid of his reaction.

I went to bed early, I didn't want to sleep but I wanted to be alone with my thoughts. I didn't know what to do. Eventually I would have to tell my parents but I would deal with that when the time came. I finally fell asleep around 1 am. I had the same dream I've had every night for months. Its always the same, Alexander comes into my room and rapes me and I always wake up crying and screaming. What really gets to me is the look in his eyes, it is so very frightening. This night was a little different because when I woke up I wasn't alone . I knew someone else was there, I could feel it. I looked around my room nervously feeling another persons presence and that is when my visitor came into view...

(A/N: NO OFFENSE TO ANYONE WHO HAS GIVEN UP A CHILD THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT, ITS JUST THAT THE BELLA IN MY STORY ISNT 4 THAT SO DONT HATE ME)