I WANNA FORGET BUT I THINK I NEED YOUR HELP...

Cheerin' up

My heart nearly stopped. I thought it had been Alexander in my room but it wasn't and for that I was thankful. I was afraid that he had come to take advantage of me again or kill me this time.

"Alice?!?" I whispered surprised

"I'm sorry Bella but I had a vision of you crying and screaming and I came over to make sure you were alright" she said innocently.

I smiled at her kindness, she was so sweet to come over here to check on me. Even if she did scared me half to death. I waited for my heart to restart itself then spoke

"I'm fine, thank you Alice, I just had a bad dream is all" I didn't want to tell her that I've had the same dream every night for months so I left it at that. She looked like she knew exactly what the dream had been about, but I couldn't be sure. She did have a vision after all, and with my sleep talking she most likely heard me say something about it. I'm not sure what I screamed at night, I just know that I did, well what ever it was it probably wasn't Pleasant.

"oh Bella I'm going to make you fell better, ill take you shopping tomorrow, just us girls and we will have so much fun, you will feel better I promise" she smiled. I thought about her proposal and considering I hate shopping I began to protest but she cut me off with

" I already saw it and it will help you a lot, trust me" she sounded so sincere that it was impossible for me not to trust her so I agreed that I would go shopping with her.

"I'll be here to pick you up at 10am sharp" was the last thing she said before disappearing out of my window. It was still very early in the morning so I went back to sleep only to wake up two more times crying from the same nightmare. Damn nightmares why can't they just go away? That was my reason for coming to Forks in the first place, to get away from Alexander and that night, I didn't want to have to deal with it anymore, there is nothing I hated more than having to re-live that nigh. Remembering only brought tears, I ended up crying myself to sleep holding the ring he had given me.

I woke up the next morning at 8:30 and knew right away that I wouldn't be able to go back to sleep. So I decided to get up, eat, and get ready for Alice. I didn't really want to go shopping but I did need to do something to get my mind off Alexander, I just hoped it would help like Alice said it would. I ate some apple jacks, my favorite cereal, and then showered. The warm water relaxed me and helped me clear my mind.

My outfit was simple, a black shirt that said in white letters "PLAY DIRTY" black jeans and my black and white converses. I was still depressed so I thought black would be the best color to dress in. I was mourning the loss of my Alexander.

Alice arrived at 10 sharp, just like she had promised. As she had also promised I had a really good time and felt happier after our five hour shopping trip. I know it sounds like along time but you know what they say 'time flies when your having fun' that saying is oh so true. Alice, Rosalie, and I went to every clothing store at the Port Angeles mall. We had a blast, and a ton of clothes, it wasn't the shopping that I liked but rather the company. They were so nice to me, and even though I had only met them the day before, it was like we had been friends forever. We talked about random things, the places we've been and we would like to visit. That conversation was dominated mostly by me because living so long they had been a lot of different places. I don't know how the conversation turned this way but they told me about the powers that some of the cullen family members had. Edward could read minds, jasper could effluence emotions and Alice could see the future. Alice also told me that for some reason he couldn't read my mind and it frustrated him very much. That information brought me great pleasure though because there are things that run through my mind that are private. I didn't know how I would feel if he had been able to read my mind the entire time. Alice talked the most, and although Rosalie was a bit more shy towards me than Alice is I like her just the same.

We got back to Forks around 4 and we all went back to the Cullen house hold. I didn't mind not going home, it would only give me way too much time to think. Everyone except Jasper was there sitting in the front room watching tv. When we walked in everyones heads snapped up quickly and they greeted us, then just as fast they were back to watching tv.

"Come on Bella they are too preoccupied right now, lets chat" Alice said as her and Rosalie pulled me into the hallway. It was very open, it must have originally been several rooms but the walls had been removed to create one wide space. I let my eyes drift to the grand piano on top of a platform by the door. "Do you play?" Rosalie asked with a curious smile. "A little" I answered.

I could only play what Alexander had taught me a long time ago, he loved music and played many instruments, and promised to teach me to play the piano. It took a while for me to learn even the simplest information but he never showed any signs of impatience.

"Would you play for us" Alice asked enthusiastically. She looked so sweet in that moment that I was incapable of saying no to her. I thought about what to play for a moment and I decided to play a song that I had been working on for a few weeks prior to the "incident" with Alexander. I had wanted to surprise him and show him that I made up a song all on my own, but I never got the chance. It saddened me that I would never get to play it for him, because in all fairness it was written for him.

It was a mixture of love, happiness, warmth, and passion. I wrote it to reflect how Alexander made me feel, well before he did what he had. I turned to the Ivory keys and all the emotion that I held bottled up for the past few months came out threw music. When I first began to write it I wanted it to show exactly how I felt. Before it sounded nice but I wanted people to be able to listen to my song and feel exactly how I felt. That's what it sounded like now, not to be conceded, but this sound was so beautiful to me that it was foreign. I wasn't even aware that I could make such beautiful music. I lost myself in the music and continued to play my heart out, it really helped to calm me down. When I finished my song I looked up to see the entire cullen family staring at me with a mix of awe and sadness. "That was the most excellent piece of music I've ever heard, did you write it?" asked Edward his silken voice filled with wonder and curiosity "thank you, and yes I did write it" I answered blushing scarlet. I decided it would be better not to look into his eyes again because of how it made me feel the last time. Although it felt nice, it reminded me about Alexander, which most things did.

"oh my goodness Bella that was wonderful" that reaction came from Alice, of course. " you play very well dear I must admit if I could cry I would" Esme said looking so sad that I almost cried myself. Everyone else agreed with her, nodding. "thank you everyone" I said feeling self conscience.

"so, Isabella what are you doing tonight?" Emmet asked suddenly. I hadn't even thought about doing anything, I was just going to go home and try to not think about Alexander. "Um nothing, why?" I answered hesitantly.

"well everyone is going on a hunting trip except me, because I hunted earlier this week and I was wondering if you wanted to go somewhere with me, for fun?" he concluded.

I looked at Rosalie, she seemed nice enough but I wasn't sure how she would feel about me going out with her husband, seeing my hesitation Rosalie jumped in "Its alright Bella, go and have fun, you need it" how did she know that could every tell I was depressed? I thought I was covering up very well.

While everyone else was hunting Emmet and I went to the movies, I wasn't ready for any type of romantic film, it would hurt too much, so we settled on watching an action adventure. It was such a corny film that Emmet and I didn't really watch it but made fun of the entire movie instead. We laughed nonstop about the cheesy film we were watcing.

I must admit that I had an excellent time and he made me forget about everything. I could tell we were going to be really good friends. He made me laugh without really even trying and it did cheer me up, a lot. After the movie finished Emmet took me home jokingly saying that I had enough excitement for a pregnant lady for one night. I laughed at that, playfully punching him in the arm.

I got home around 7 o'clock Charlie was on the couch watching the sports channel. When he heard me come in he turned around to greet me

"hi bella"

"Hi dad" I replied.

"where were you today? you weren't here when I came home" damn. I didn't want to lie so I got as close to the truth that I could

"I went to the mall and met some of the cullen children"

"Dr. Cullen's children?" he asked in astonishment.

I pretend not to notice and replied smoothly with

"yeah. They are all very nice."

"Well I'm glad your enjoying yourself and making friends" I realized that he had emphasized 'friends' and wondered why until he voiced his next question

" which ones did you meet exactly" oh. I got it then, Charlie was worried I had met one of the boys and spent the day with him.

"Rosalie and Alice" I replied quickly to relieve his tension. He visibly relaxed and I took that as my cue to leave. I called goodnight from the top of the stair and went into my room to get some rest. Well as much rest as I could with those horrid nightmares bothering me.