The Jack Rules

Disclaimer: not mine

Summary: Rules 151 to 200

Thanks: to all my awesome reviewers, you guys totally rock.

Free eyepatches for Brix, purplediamond7, I am the Root of all Evil...or did you want peg-legs?

Thanks for contributing to this list to make it more Jack-like

#151. No matter how many times you shoot the monkey, it keeps coming back.

#151a. And it steals eyes and hats.

#151b. And it claimed that it really missed you...suspicious.

#152. Norrington and every other man in the Navy who wear white wigs look like ice-creams.

#153. I´m sure Barbossa rehearsed his other speeches to the Brethren, too.

#154. And he would make a lousy wizard.

#154a. You have to speak with love, mate.

#155. The person who said that only death is making the day worth living was an idiot.

#155a. Oh, that just happens to be Barbossa. What an idiot!

#156. Does anyone else thinks it´s weird to have a pirate song as the call for the Brethren?

#157. Free drinks for eveyone!

#158. The hangman´s scary.

#158a. So is Beckett´s assistant.

#159. What a coincidence that every member of the Brethren can speak English, considering that we are all from different corners of the Earth!

#160. What good is the line "Never shall we die" if you are killed the second after you sung it?

#161. After a hangover your tongue feels fuzzy.

#161a. Mine does that every minute.

#162. All you have to remember is: I am Captain Jack Sparrow.

#163. My hat. My Pearl. My dirt. My rum. My peanut.

#163a. Everyone who disagrees or disapproves is a damn idiot.

#164. And here Barbossa comes again into the game.

#165. Smoking is bad for your health, you know.

#165a. But since you not even have a heart anymore, I think it´s ok, Jones.

#166. You filthy, mangy character

#167. I disapprove of the term "Jackass".

#168. Why has every villain a pet?

#168a. Barbossa´s monkey.

#168b. Jones´ Kraken.

#168c. At least Beckett had none.

#168d. I am afraid of Cotton now.

#169. I´ve never been a fan of traditions.

#169a. Hi dad! Keeper of the Code..and so on. ...somebody help me

#170. How come no one noticed that Davy Jones´ medaillon was laying in Tia Dalma´s house?

#171. Did no one come to save me just because they missed me?

#171a. Creepy monkey.

#172. I think a bathhouse is a stupid hideout for a pirate.

#172a. In your face Sao Feng!

#173. I am a hard man to predict

#174.When Will saved me from the hangman, he did look like a musketeer.

#175. Why does someone named Davy Jones captain a ship called "Flying Dutchman" when his name clearly indicate a anglo/american background?

#175a. Why call a ship Flying Dutchman at all? There no dutch people on board (I guess) and it can´t fly...it can submerge-rather the opposite then.

#176. You seem so familiar. Have I threatened you before?

#177. Whoever said "Hang the rules and hang the code!" did not know my dad.

#178. Why does everyone think that pirates bury all their treasure and leave treasure maps behind? When we make booty, we sail to the next port and spend it all while having one hell of a night.

#179. My soul is worth 100 souls.

#179a. Cool.

#180. Annoying Barbossa is fun.

#181. Does every savage folk honor their gody by eating them?

#182. Yes, Scarlett is fat.

#183. The keys run off.

#184. It was maybe not the best idea to search for the fountain of Youth with this very small boat.

#185. Piracy rocks!

#186. You need to find yourself a girl, mate!

#187. Bootstrap´s dumb: Why send a cursed pirate medaillon, which is wanted by cruel, demented vicious pirates who just marooned their own captain, to his uninvolved, unprotected wife and his only child?

#188. Falling in open graves is a bad omen, right?

#189. I am the only captain who managed to sail in a desert.

#190. I´m sorry for shooting the Jack without the shirt and with the cool tattoos.

#190a. I don´t know where that goat came from.

#191. Why did Will throw corpses off my ship when he was trying to think like me?

#191a. That was just gross.

#192. I need a bigger telescope.

#193. Why gave Barbossa his piece of eight, which is his pretty important, from all people to Ragetti?

#193a. Being dead screws with one´s mind. Honestly.

#194. Was Tia Dalma really barefoot all the time?

#195. I think Calypso and Davy Jones make a cute couple - they deserved each other.

#196. I won´t apologize for anything I´ve ever done.

#197. The Pearl..means Freedom.

#197a. To Freedom! To the Pearl! To RUM!

#198. I have a bigger telescope than Barbossa.

#199. Not all treasure is amde of silver and gold.

#199a Rum is a treasure, too.

#200. When I was hallucinating in Davy Jones´Locker, I saw multiple versions of myself. Later I saw a group of persons that abandoned me, betrayed me, marooned me (twice) (yeah, Barbossa again), killed me, are total strangers to me, have a witch with them and one persons was killed by myself...and now they wonder why I thought they were an illusion?

Author´s talk:

Thank you so much for your reviews. I really got a boost of energy out of them. Thanks for your lovely words.

I´m brain-dead now. But hey, 200 Rules are not bad.

When I have new ideas, I will continue. Honestly.