Urban theory; Chapter 10
His thoughts heavy, Rikimaru tried to doze in the armchair, but couldn't feel his awareness slip away. This disappointed him truly and he just sat leaning to his left elbow so that it was beginning to hurt. Tatsumaru instead slept like a baby, taking up all the room from the couch. It was eight p.m. and Ayame was still in Kiku's or where ever. The house was empty of people to talk to and that was good, until…
Tatsumaru rolled over on the couch and yawned opening his eyes just so much that he could see where he was sleeping. He rose up contented by the fact that he knew the place and that Rikimaru was there next to him. He seemed to be absent, just staring in to the open space. "…What day… it is today…?"
Rikimaru's thoughts had lingered on the other man just a while ago. Rikimaru had to be the more grown up one. The way Tatsumaru had acted in the bar, appeared to his door and passed out, reminded him of something. Or was it that he had appeared on his door, looking for shelter from the big bad world. Who was he to protect anyone? Oni, as ridicules as it felt now, had in away protected him. He was the more grown up one of the two. He wouldn't think about driving a car over the others jacket and burning it afterwards just to show the other that he didn't care a fuck. "…Sunday…"
It was Déjà vu, of course, he realized. The whole arrangement was so obvious. He was acting on to Tatsumaru like Oni had been treating him. Non-caring user, already looking for a next weak minded to abuse. Oni saw him in merest a funny guy who was okay to shag with in time to time, but eventually still too annoying, too boring, to stand, like Tatsumaru. Rikimaru, like Oni wouldn't care if he broke the other one's heart by doing something irrelevantly stupid. It was so easy to feel cold even if the other didn't share it.
Yes it was the same, except Tatsumaru didn't love him.
And except; he didn't most certainly anymore love Oni. No way it was possible, because he had never loved Oni. It had been an illusion, a fiction of his own lonely brain that had no idea what love really was about.
My god, what was he thinking, Rikimaru woke up to fall down from his high horse. Had he always been this pathetic or had he eaten something very over dated? God damn, he wanted to get out of his own head, but this time with out any drugs including to it. Maybe more of an axe was needed but it wasn't in a reach.
"…How did I get here…?"
Talk about Déjà vu, Rikimaru thought desperately trying to put his self centred, self pity thoughts away.
"Crawled in from the door and fell on me…"
"…Yeah… Did I apologize?"
"Hmmm… yep."
They changed looks. Tatsumaru looked like he wanted to hear something more from the other but Rikimaru didn't get what it could be.
"…So?" Tatsumaru started carefully. "…Since I've slept in here and not in the street… We're okay?"
"Of course…! …Where were you the whole night, I waited you to come back… and so did the others…"
"Oh, I'm sure Jin did… He won't talk to me for sure…"
"Sure he will, he's just like that sometimes… Trust me he'll get over it…"
"…So, you missed me…?" Tatsumaru grinned teasing and managed to look sheepish at the same time. How was it even possible, Rikimaru thought quietly? "I doubt it… You know… You have gotten yourself quite a reputation as a… real bash beast, everybody seems to know you…you know that?"
"Oh no…" Rikimaru stated shamefully.
"You know they are saying that the beast has made a comeback… You partied a lot when you studied?"
Rikimaru ignored the question. "Did you go home or what…?"
"What-what-what? You trying to hide from me…" Tatsumaru crawled to him, his look giving away his intentions.
"Tatsu…"
"…Has the party-animal-maru gone hiding for the Sunday morning…?" He said kneeling on the floor, closing on Rikimaru's legs.
"…It's evening, pm. not am…"
"Oh? …Well, even better… for what I got in mind…"
"…Tatsu…I…"
Tatsumaru looked away and for a moment he looked amused. "…Fine… Don't worry, I won't jump to your bones if you don't want me to…" He had rolled back to sit on the floor and leaned now to the couch. He opened his messy hair and tied it back again. "…I'm gona go…"
"Don't leave yet… Stay…" Ouch, the cursed déjà vu…
"…Look, Rikimaru, I won't go broke, you don't have to…"
"Sit your pretty ass down, now…" He told Tatsumaru, pointing at the couch and Tatsumaru did as he was told after some hesitation. So Tatsumaru had noticed. "…I'm tired as hell… but I'm afraid of being by myself right now…?"
"…Why?"
"I can't sleep… things just…" He sighted. "…keep bugging me…"
"…I know the feeling…" Tatsumaru leaned back on the couch, straightening his shirt. "Has something… happened?" It seemed so unlike him to be sad and oh, well, turn down sex.
"Oh nothing much… got drunk, got drugged… nearly raped…" He laughed tiredly with out happiness in the voice and continued. "…and… oh boy…" He just continued laughing, this time rubbing his eyes. "…and the morning was even worse…" Somehow that didn't make him laugh anymore in self pity.
The living room was dead quiet for a moment. "…How is that funny?"
"…Not in anyway, I guess…"
"...What happened? Weren't you with…?"
"Yeah… I don't really wanna talk about it… It's not like I would remember any of it, anyways…"
"Rikimaru… you sure, he didn't… in anyway, hurt you?"
"Only my pride… My ex saved me…"
Tatsumaru felt helpless seeing Rikimaru like this, weak and lost, like he himself had been. Why didn't he know better what to do or what to say to make the other feel better?
"…Which makes it even more embarrassing…"
"…Don't blame your self…"
"Why not? …It was my fault was it not? I drank too much as all ways and didn't pay any attention for what was happening… Sure as hell, it was my fault…"
Tatsumaru couldn't make up anything to deny it. "…Why was the morning worse…?"
"…I… I rather not tell… you mind…" He smiled mocking, but as he saw Tatsumaru's concerned face his own got more serious too. "…I'm fine, really just tired…"
"So, if you're fine and tired… Why can't you sleep?"
Maybe he should tell Tatsumaru and hear what he thought of it. Something told him not to tell. Why, he thought, why couldn't he tell him? "…My ex and I… we… didn't actually brake up as friends… and it wasn't really a brake up… we just turned each others our back and walked away in different directions…" Now as he was saying it, it didn't sound so bad and Rikimaru felt himself very petty. "…He cheated me… I caught them, never seen him since…"
Little insecure he looked over to Tatsumaru who waited to hear more. This was useless maybe, Rikimaru thought as he had said the words. The words seemed so hallow, meaningless and strange, like he would have been telling someone else's story instead of his.
"…He tried to be nice… he was nice… He… wanted us to be friends…?"
"…So you were like really serious… when you were together…?"
Was it so hard to believe that he could build up a real relationship, Rikimaru thought? His carefully chosen words maybe didn't give out the deepness of his feelings towards the man. "…No… we weren't even friends… so I daub it would work anymore…" Before Tatsumaru would ask more, he thought to get ahead of him. "…So… You still didn't tell me where you went and with who…?" Rikimaru managed a smile.
Tatsumaru's concern got distracted with that sudden question. "Well the truth to be told… I wasn't either having the greatest evening… The roommate I told you…?"
"Mr. Cuddly…?"
"….Hmm, yeah… well, he just turned nineteen… but that's not the real issue, we had a fight about… me… us and…"
"You?"
"…His family doesn't really digest him having a relationship with a man, not that they would know but, his aunt died and he had to leave to her funeral… He was really afraid meeting them, afraid they would guess… I should know, I've been there… Well, it went to a fight, he blaming me… what I had done to him and misled him to live a sinful live…"
Rikimaru laughed, mostly because he was so tired.
"…It's not funny…"
He couldn't stop just yet. "…I know… But hey, what can you do when you're so damn gorgeous…?"
"Now that really isn't funny, Rikimaru…" Tatsumaru looked away and Rikimaru had to worse himself to stop laughing.
"Come on, I didn't mean it like that, you should know…!"
"Yeah, yeah, right, whatever…"
"…You don't believe me? You could make a straight man…"
"Talk about misleading, you are not helping…" He looked over to Rikimaru and found him grinning mindlessly. "…You…! Fucking annoying today… I'm not that amazing, never been, never will be…"
Tatsumaru looked sad and pissed and that wasn't good as he himself was having so much fun. And he really shouldn't have said those things as he knew how insecure Tatsumaru was about his appearances sometimes. He sighted deeply and hopelessly looked over the room. "…Prove it to me…"
As Rikimaru didn't continue on it Tatsumaru looked a bit towards him. "…What…?"
He waited patiently until Tatsumaru looked at him properly eye to eye. "…Strip… and let me look at you, make me touch myself…Tatsu…?"
Tatsumaru laughed nervously and blushed looking for a spot in the floor that would have made him think of something else than that image. "…Weren't you tired or something… Besides… That's just… perverted…! I won't and that's that…!"
"…Well, that's that then…" Tatsumaru had no curiosity to experiment. "…I would… but I think I can't get up from here anymore…"
Tatsumaru still stared absurdly to the floor as Rikimaru took a more comfortable position on the armchair sliding down a bit. The ceiling was… plank. "…Nineteen, you say…? Is it serious…?"
Tatsumaru had crossed his arms over his chest and seemed to be thinking a right answer for the question. "…He's nineteen…? …And homophonic…?"
"I remember when I was nineteen… All I could think about was sex…"
"…How does that differ from the point you are now?"
He thought it for a moment. "…Then I hadn't got this… feeling of being alone when I'm old, like 35 and my life is over and… I think -a lot- about it, not –all the frigging time-…"
"…Right…" Tatsumaru sighted giving up in some department.
Before either one had the change to start a new pointless conversation the door opened and Ayame came home. She was smiling to herself as she put her jacket on the rack. Rikimaru hadn't seen her so happy since he couldn't remember and was little surprised.
"…Hello my darling wife… What took you so long?"
She walked to the living room still a smile playing on her face as she looked at the two boys.
"…I had such a… You know what…? I think I met a wonderful man…"
Flashback
Ayame was washing her hair in the small shower that was situated in the same room with the bathroom. She wasn't in her greatest mood. She was still busy in her work doing long hours and the only free day she had in weeks was cut in half. First her boss called her and asked for some ex con's file so she had to stop by the office. As she had delivered this mystery file to her boss's house it had started raining and of course tyre broke down. When she arrived home, covered in wet mud and ready to kill the first person who came across, most possibly Rikimaru, the shower didn't work.
So it was raining outside like back in the times of Noah, but not a single trop was coming down from the shower. Momentarily she thought to go and stand naked on the street, but then she could kiss goodbye for the promotion she had been working for. And there were too much dishes in the sink.
So what can a girl do but call to her mates? Or to her only option; Kiku. Unfortunately Kiku had other friends too and was not home, but told her where the key was so she could go in. The house would be empty, because her dad had gone to fishing with his friend.
Now that Ayame had gotten rid of the mud and sand she started to feel a bit better. Anyways this day didn't actually differ from the others that much. Maybe some good work out would brighten up the day she had.
Ayame had just tied the towel around her after squeezing of some of the water from her hair when she heard the front door. She looked at her clock that was over the sink and thought it couldn't be Kiku yet. Perfect, she grinned to herself, she had catch a burglar. Well, all most, now she only had to catch him/her and make sure that the lesson was learned. What if Kiku had been alone in the house or her poor, old and defenceless dad?
She couldn't bear the thought and so she thought to hurry and did not dress up, just tightened the towel around her.
Carefully she listened and heard some noise coming form the kitchen. She opened the door and moved forward. As she came to the kitchen she noticed it was empty. That was strange, she was sure she had heard someone in the kitchen just awhile ago. Silence had landed all around the house and for a moment she thought the house was haunted.
Maybe the burglar had gone to living room to check the TV and that short of stuff. She walked to the other end of the hallway where the living room waited. It was too quiet. Hadn't she put on the radio as she came? As she was about to look around the corner a man behind it gave her a scare. Both jumped back and yelped.
"…But that back so I can grunt your face on the floor!" She yelled to the man who was carrying a heavy candle stick made of silver.
"…Excuse me…!?" He started angry, but then he noticed her very convincing, home security uniform that didn't quite match with her attitude.
"…What are you laughing about, dirt bag…! Don't think I can't take you…!" She pulled the candle stick from him and threw it on the sofa. In the same time Ayame tripped the man on the floor and made sure he had no change to get away by holding his legs down by her ankles and keeping his shoulders tightly on the floor. "…I assume a smug like you has no friends and you came alone, huh?!"
"Listen…" The man tried in vain.
"Don't try anything stupid, I'm a cop and I know every trick you got! So you came alone…? How sorry for you…"
"You got it all wrong…!"
"Don't tell me you're the Santa Claus, you got the wrong date, buck…" This wasn't usually her luck, she thought, admiring the crook she'd catch. Usually she got all the balding, over aged, idiots.
"…I… if you'd just let me explain…!" He made a false move by putting his hands to her bare tights to gain some control under the lunatic who had a graze glint in her eyes.
"…What's it pervert!" She shake furiously her finger over his face but that was a mistake because she had to leg go of his shoulder and gave him an opportunity to roll over.
He pressed her hands on the floor with much effort. She was feisty and fast, if not so strong.
"Listen, missy, I don know who you are and what are you doing here, but…"
Ayame wasn't going to stand this. "…Missy?!" She kicked him in the stomach and won her place back. "…Don't ever call me missy… So you got id or are you just a bum? You thought to rob us off, huh?"
"…Rob –us- off?!" He tried to rose up but couldn't. "…I live here!"
"Yeah sure and I'm a house maid…! Don't think so… And keep your hands where I can see them!"
The man just rose them up defensively and looked away innocently if not half terrified. "…You sure you are a cop?"
"Sorry, the badge didn't quit fit to this towel."
"Yes, I can imagine…"
"Don't get yourself in any bigger problems you already in…! How about that id, anytime soon?"
"…My back pocket…There should be a valet…"
"Stolen no doubt… So come on, show it to me…!"
"Well… you kinda sitting on me…?"
"Oh, give me a break… Roll over then, but slowly…!" Ayame said very stern. "Put your hands above your head." She took the valet and look in to it with one hand the other pressing on his back. "Who did you say you were?"
"Matsunoshin Gohda..."
"…Yeah, right and you have a fifteen years old daughter…" She laughed still looking.
"Yes… Kiku, you know her?"
The door slammed shut and they heard Kiku's voice from the hallway. "Hi…!" She looked at the two: Her dad on his stomach, hands behind his head and Ayame sitting on his backside only a white towel on her.
"…Dad! Why do you always have to be so embarrassing…?!"
The man on the floor tried not to choke on the mat under him as he tried his best to understand his daughter. Ayame was still sitting on him. "…D-dad?"
Kiku put her things on the rack and walked to them. "Yeah, you two haven't met? …Oh yeah it was Rikimaru and you were late as all ways…"
Both stumbled up from the floor as Kiku introduced them. "…Ayame, this is my dad, dad, this is Ayame… Now what have you two been doing here… Or wait I don't wanna know…! I have homework!" She rushed to the upstairs and was gone like she never had been there. "…God you're sick…!" Well all most.
"…What's your language, young lady…!"
"…Okay, I go and put my clothes on now there is no fire… I mean…" She mentally hit herself. "I'll put my clothes on…"
"Yeah, you do that…"
Ayame slipped in the bathroom and thought about killing herself in there. What was the matter with her?!
In a minute she heard a knock on the door. "…Sorry to bother, but I just thought to ask you… are you a coffee or a tea drinker…?"
Why was he offering her coffee now, she thought and couldn't get on with her dressing up. It would be a one awkward tea time, but at least she could apologize. She bites her lip just wanting to get the embarrassment over and done. "…Um… Coffee, thank you…"
"…Okay…"
She heard his steps move away and sighted. Yes, just her luck…
The kitchen smelled nice, fresh coffee and donuts if she wasn't mistaking completely. She didn't remember when she'd last time felt herself so uneasy. Maybe it was when she had laughed like a pig in a posh party. No this was worse. She had her hands in her pockets just because she didn't know where else to put them. "Hey… I'm really sor…"
"Maybe we should start all over again, like that never happened…?" He looked at her in question until he gave her his hand. "Hi… I'm Kiku's dad, Matsunoshin…"
"Ayame…" She smiled not sure was she confused still or just amused.
"…You can call me Mat as my friends do…" He offered her to sit down and went to look for cups over the closet.
"So…Mat… You really are her father, because if I didn't know I just might have mistaken you to somebody else…?"
"Can't blame you for that… People do that a lot since we only have fifteen years between us…" He smiled from where the spoons were situated. "When I'd gone to her school, like parent's meeting… they often think I'm her big brother… but never a dad…"
"…She talks about you a lot still… just…"
"Not my age, yeah… Well you heard her; I'm all ways embarrassing her…" Gohda sighted deeply, but smiled still. "Hope she isn't too impossible with you…?"
"Nah, she's wonderful…"
Gohda sat down with her as he had got everything ready. "...Don't get offended if I ask…?"
"Hmm… maybe, maybe not…?"
"You really a cop or where you trying to spook me out?"
"…Don't you remember? …That never happened, right?"
End of flashback
"Can't believe you really attacked Kiku's father, Aya?!" Rikimaru faked to be shocked.
"Don't start with me…! You should have warned me that he is dead gorgeous…" She shouted back as Tatsumaru still laughed for his private mental image.
"Not that… gorgeous…?" Rikimaru asked with suspicion. Ayame straitened her hair a bit and looked at the other way before saying it with a strait face.
"…Well… Of course not… He's Kiku's dad… for crying out loud! How desperate do you think I am?"
"…I think I should go home… and see if he's already home…" Tatsumaru said getting up from the couch. Ayame used the opportunity to flee and went to her room.
"Aya…?" Tatsumaru went after her and peaked to her room from the door.
"…Huh?"
"…Don't be too mean to him…okay?"
"Why? What's happened?"
Tatsumaru left and the door clanked shut coldly. Ayame stood there and looked at the door and then Rikimaru who was already a sleep on the couch. And she had thought she had a bad day, Ayame pleased his sort hair, but he didn't nudge.
She went to get his blanket and tucked him to sleep at the couch. Why did these things happen? Why now when he'd been so much happier for the few passing days? She leaned her head on the couch as she sat on the floor and though it over.
"You gona sleep there…?"
She looked up surprised. "…I thought you were a sleep… Tatsu told me…Are you okay?"
"Yep, but you people should really stop asking me that or I won't be sure anymore…"
"The ex… was it him?"
"…And we have a winner…!" He yelled in quiet, half sleep voice.
She looked at him carefully trying to find the true answers he was hiding, but he saw that.
"…Maybe I've thought wrong about my feelings towards him. It wasn't that bad thought… It should have been, but wasn't… He actually was nice… if that's possible…?"
"…No way, he's a complete shit head for cheating you and deserves to be burned alive, but… he helped you…?"
"Does it make him less of an asshole…? After all… anyone should have helped a person in the state that I was… it's an obligation…?"
"…Hmm… No-one else noticed…?" She ticked her fingers on the fabric.
"…You know… he wanted to be friends…?"
"Screw him… I mean not…! He's only trying to get from you, right…? You wanna be his friend…?"
"I… dunno…"
"So, what do you want then?"
He looked at her and for a moment he thought should he say it out loud. Rikimaru had a vicious but solid look in his eyes as his voice was weak as a whisper. "…Revenge…"
---
Oni crabbed a book from one of the boxes. It was lighter than he had thought; maybe it was the wrong book. He heightened it again in his hands just as if he would have been blind and instead of looking at the cover he stared at the other boxes. It was the wrong goddamn book, he finally realized and threw it away to somewhere.
Why he couldn't find anything anymore, he thought as he had stopped his search after many hours. He put his tired arms to his hips and twirled around looking at the box hell around him. It was already dark outside. Dark and cold, like in his apartment. Did he try to punish himself for something, he wondered while he kept himself busy. Well it wasn't working. He changed his place on the floor and looked into another box. There where books, memos, cables and microchips which he all dumped on the couch.
"…This isn't supposed to be here…" Under all of it was a calculator looking thing. Any burglar could have said what it really was; a code cracker to pas security systems. Oni looked at it, it brought back old memories.
But who cared about memories, when you still were live and well? He sighted putting it to a table next to him. He should have cared. Now that he had so graciously fucked up everything. Anyways the cracker was old and ancient history so with a help of it you couldn't even break into an old lady's mattress. It wasn't really dangerous stuff to leave lying around where everyone could see it.
What else had he forgotten to hide or destroy to keep his double and triple live hidden? Considering the chaos in his apartment it was a miracle that he hadn't fucked up even more graciously. And in how many pieces he had to go to keep things up. There was Suzaku Moerumoya who was innocent, little loose but promising artist. His friends called him often Oni as a comical nickname. The second was called also Oni, by his fellow mates like Tesshu, Kagami, Kagura and Kichigoro. But that was all in the past, that Oni didn't exist anymore like their little gang of robbers didn't. The third was the last and the worst; Onikage. That personality had gotten him self in to the list of FBI's three most wanted. He was a con artist, thief and a rotten, spineless shit, who yet made no mistakes. He was the nightmare, but also the one of the three that most likely keyed up in him.
While he crawled under a small tea table to get a hold of some boxes, he thought about how he loved his life on the edge and wouldn't have it in any other way. That he wasn't so sure anymore. Sure, he had money more than enough and if he ever gets caught he could by himself dozen lawyers from the top end. He had houses, he could act on his whimsy whit out thinking the costs, make the world go on its knees by a snap of a keyboard or trap the big shots and laugh to their stupidity with his friends. Despite it all, all that he had concurred he missed a family around him. He hate to admit that he wanted all that sappy stuff; wife, kids, semi house and even the goddamn Beethoven if necessary to feel complete. But now he couldn't find himself sure even about that any longer. Right now the only thing that could make him feel some short of a fulfilment was the one lawyer he couldn't buy for him self. Not with a favour, not with an apology, not by crawling nor by twenty thousand leather jacket. And for the truth he didn't want to own him like a piece of item.
Finally he had found the right box as he sat on the floor looking trough its contents. Maybe he should clean his apartment. It had been months since he moved here and it still was a mess. He was loose headed no daub, he thought. First he changes his apartment to get away bad karma and feelings and then can't settle down to start over. Had starting over been his plan to begin with, he wondered and took a book in his hands. It was poisonously dusty. He should be ashamed of himself, he had been very tidy.
He leafed trough the pages to check something he wasn't sure of. "…glaze… burn in… 1020-1080 degrees…hmm…?" Oni closed the book and eyed the room. It wasn't like him to forget numbers or little details like that. Was he getting the flue or something? He took the book with him and walked to the basement that was four floors down.
In a small secret alcove was an oven made for burning clay. He changed the temperature from a button and closed the door. On his way up he tossed the book over a pile of wood meant to be burned. Doorbell rang.
He went to the door and looked at the camera that was guarding the front door. He pressed a button next to the screen. "What do you want?"
The man standing in cold air was surprised for the voice but looked at up to the camera. "For first… to get in… How's that…?" The man had a short black hair that was slicked up like some 'idols' winner and his dressing reminded about the same. He had small but beautifully shaped eyes that didn't uncover much of his thoughts that he liked to keep on his own until the other had no other options than listen. He didn't look handsome by the first look, more like a sculpture made by needles, so sharp were the lines of his face.
"And second?"
"Are you bloody way trying to kill me on your front step…!?" The man on the door had a fit. "…You know I cannot say what I got to say in here, when I don't even know who's there to listen, honey…?"
Oni thought not to torment him longer and push the button that opened the door downstairs.
"…Third floor…"
"…Should I be thankful or what…?" Oni heard him say as he already was away from the camera. He walked back to living room and started to short things out again. The other man didn't bother to take of his coat and sat on the couch just opening a few buttons. He looked at Oni who was looking trough some papers.
"What did you want, Ranzou?"
Ranzou made a gesture with his hands and had that stupid, sneaky, smile on his face that Oni wasn't sure did it ever get off.
"…You are not going to offer me tea and biscuits…?"
"…Hmmm? No."
"How rude…" Ranzou took a better position on the couch. "…I only came to check upon you that have you already become a mummy, and I'm hurt to notice that my speculations are true…"
"Ranzou… Cut to the chase, will you?" Oni put the papers away giving his full attention to this babbling annoyance. Ranzou seemed nervous or just more serious, it was hard to tell. He changed his position again and was now leaning to his elbows above his knees. He considered his words for a long time for to be Ranzou.
"…I need a… one more guy, to help me with the… 'Spark'… from, well I pet you know where it is kept…?"
"…I don't do that short of stuff anymore."
"Right… Tell me, you cannot possible think of paying all your pills by painting stuff? I know your famous now and all, but hey… Don't think I'm stupid."
"Ask somebody else."
Ranzou saw him concentrating back to his papers. "…You know… You know what I think, Oni?" He didn't get a reply. "…I think you 'moved on' your own… and we, the ordinary people, just won't suit you anymore…"
"You won't change my mind."
"…The hell, what would I do with you anyways… You've been out so long you probably don't even remember how the things do work… Time flies, Oni… And if you don't fly with it… You drop… like a stone."
"Maybe I like dropping and pain and all…"
Ranzou sneered. "…Daub it… Its written all over you, you wouldn't like it…"
"Would you?"
"…Hey, we're all friends here, right?" He smiled and sifted funnily. "…You have thought me a lot and I respect you for that… I'm just sad to see you giving up…"
"Well like I said, get somebody else, I'm busy with other things…"
"…Yeah, I can see, you moved in recently…?"
"…Not really."
Ranzou rose up and for a moment he looked at him completely focused to fix a broken basket that was made of twined willows. "…Right then… I'll go…" He waited for some short of a mark that the other had heard him and finally Oni made a nod. He saw Ranzou of to the elevator. To the last point the other waited that he would change his mind, but eventually he had no other choice but to step in the elevator.
"I know you're not out…" Ranzou said trough the upright grid just before the box started to sink down.
Oni waited that he was out of sight and went back to the living room. Well of course he knew; he wasn't stupid as he had just said. He had known Ranzou since they were kids. Ranzou was only a half a year younger but still he had needed constant looking after. His classmates teased him because he had trashy clothes and because he had no father. Oni took him under his wing, still he wasn't sure why and they started doing together anything and everything that they could think of was illegal and turned to their benefit. Later they roads parted.
Oni looked after him from the window. Ranzou had potential to do whatever he'd want but instead of reaching forward he rather spend his time and money in specialist porn shops and strip clubs, chancing a girl more often than his socks. Sad, sad, sad, Oni thought a bit irritated. What a waste of his time.
He looked over the code cracker and wondered if Ranzou had even noticed it. He looked trough some of the boxes as if to remember what he really possessed. His hand caught a false address book he kept to lure of some of the curious ones. No point to look in there, there were only celebrities, which he actually and some unfortunately knew.
Then he remembers that there was also Rikimaru's former number. He didn't have the same number anymore, which he knew. He also knew that he was living with some beautiful female, who had the same last name and happened to be a cop. That had scared him a bit back when he'd traced Rikimaru down a few days after he'd disappeared. But it was false conclusion.
Would things be any different if he hadn't been so ashamed of himself and faced him then? Rikimaru hated him and he knew he deserved it still. But if he only could have explained it. Would he have understood even if not forgiven?
Kagami hadn't spoken to him since they slept together. Maybe she was ashamed too as it had been so obviously a mistake. She was his last change to prove himself something that didn't mattered now. Not whit out him anyway.
Last night he had been in the bar with Tesshu. Kagami and Kagura should have been there too but it seemed they were somewhere else bad mouthing him. Women, he thought sighting deep. Kichigoro, their short of a leader, was doing his sentence in prison. He was older than the rest and had looked after them and had even gone to jail for them. Sure it sounded that the four had had it easy, but it wasn't so. They were between the rock and a hard place, cops and crooks and neither really liked them for some reason. Things had luckily changed a lot. Kichigoro was living like king inside, mostly because of the bribes Oni and the others had paid.
And he had nearly been caught. He shivered for the though of a small box whit out windows. How different his life would be on the rot bottom. He'd been there once and sure as hell wasn't going to go there again. So where the hell was he going? His calendar was pretty much empty or at least there weren't anything important. He'd almost forgotten that Rikimaru was supposed to bring his jacket back.
He laughed quietly amused by the fact that he'd nearly forgotten.