Tobi: Kyaaa! Soooo many people like us!

Deaidara: Well, duh. Were the Akatsuki. The most evil, badass, and sexy organization ever!

Sasori: He ment the story.

Deidara: Oh...well. The author does not own Naruto.

As Kakuzu walked down, everyone had a sore back from sleeping on the ground…except Hidan who slept in an armchair.

"Okay, we need new clothes. We can't go around in our regular clothes."

"For once Kisame, you said something smart." Itachi said, monotone as ever. Kisame's eyes lit up.

"Does that mean I can go to Sea World?"

"…No…."

Kisame went from kawaii happy, to chibi sad.

"I think Deidara should go." Tobi said.

"Why me, un?!"

"Because you looked like a girl to begin with." Zetsu said, causing everyone to laugh except Deidara. "Itachi should go, too."

"…Why me? You know shopping lacks hatred."

"I didn't. But the real reason is because of those Women's Weekly magazines you read." Zetsu said as he took out a '5th Anniversary Edition.'

"I only read that for my nail polishes!"

"Imagine all the fangirls you'll lose if this got out."

"Stupid blackmailing plant."

.:The Mall:.

Things started out bad. Before they even walked in, two guys whistled at Itachi and Deidara. That added a +2 to today's death toll. Then when they got to the store, there was a big sale in a clothes store.

"…"

"…un?"

They watched as women inside beat each other up for shirts, pants, and other things that seemed trivial to fight about. As they walked off, they could faintly hear the jaguar noises made by the fighting women.

"Here's a store, yeah."

"But it's closed..."

Deidara then made a tiny clay spider that blew the lock off, allowing them to lift the metal, barred wall up. Inside, lots of clothes…FOR FREE!

.:1 hour of stealing later:.

"Finally, we have everything…"

They started to walk out when Itachi bumped into a girl.

"Hey, watch where you're going!"

"Do you even know who I am?" Itachi said, "I am Uchiha Itachi."

This caused the girl to laugh. "Ha, another crazy fangirl? I know more than you ever will!"

Deidara just shrugged and went to the food court, extorting the cashier for a free Soda. Oh, did I mention that when the Akatsuki extort, they kill the person? So that's 3 deaths...plus, Deidara killed the 20 people ahead of him. Anyway, when Deidara returned, the girl was asking questions only Itachi would know.

"Does Itachi were purple nail polish?"

"No, I wear violet."

"Wrong, it was purple."

"Stupid girl! Violet and purple are the same."

Deidara was getting fed up with up this. He dragged Itachi away from her and blew her up, too.

"Ah, great day to be Death!" the grim reaper said, drinking some coffee as he saw the four deaths take place.

"Wow mister! You're ugly!" Konohamaru yelled at him. The next thing that happened…it went to 25 deaths after Death poked his forehead, killing him instantly.

.:Back with the others:.

Itachi and Deidara returned with four bags of clothes. They handed out each members clothes until Zetsu came.

"Here you go Zetsu." Deidara said, in a sort of way you know something's wrong. When Zetsu put it on, it blew up. It stunned Zetsu and left him with third degree burns. "Here's you're real clothes, prick." Deidara said as he just threw Zetsu's clothes on him, still mad at the joke made by him earlier.

.:Where ever Leader is:.

"This is bad! Were lost!" some girls said at the same time. They were at a hot spring and got lost in it's hallways. Though, the hallway was only a straight one with the room doors on the side. "We'll never see Leader again!"

Leader was in the spring, waiting for his bath partners. "Damn…should've given them a proper edumacation instead of one based off of striping and dancing." Leader said. "Heh. I was a gewd col-uh. Coledge? Coolage…dammit, how is that pronounced?" Turns out, Leader was too busy peeking at girls with Jiraiya instead of being at the ninja academy.

.:Back with the other people:.

After changing into their new clothes, they felt somewhat better. But because of limited stock at the closed store, they all were wearing pink T-shirts and either jean skirts or knee high khakis.

"Pink…I hate pink…."

"Don't worry about it, we'll steal more clothes from the people who wander around here." Tobi stated, knowing that people come here when they are lost. So when summer comes, which was in one week, a bunch of hikers may become lost.

"Glad to see you not dressed as a slut." Sasori said, seeing Kakuzu pout abit from having to wear under wear.

"But I liked not wearing under wear. Nothing was giving me a wedgie." Kakuzu whined, pulling out one as he spoke.

"That's because you have a fat ass." Hidan said, feeling like tormenting him abit.

"Yeah. Well…well……your religion sucks!" he whined as he locked himself in his room to cry a river.

.:Back at the hot springs:.

"Finally, after 6 hours of searching we found it!" the girls said, finally finding the right door. "Eeeeekk! Lobsterman!"

There was Leader, who waited so long, his entire body was red from the heat of the water.

Me: Poor Leader.

Sexy Girls: Waaaah! Leader-sama!

Leader: Can't...move... Hurts...too much.

Me: Hehe. Poke.

Leader: (screams in agonizing pain)

Me: Kukuku. Cool.