Celibacy
by Aki Midori
Rating: PG-13... lots of stuff which shouldn't be read by people under the age of thirteen. The concept of the fic itself is pretty much for mature readers only, yet, this fic is not that graphic as to rate it R. So I'll stick to PG-13
Pairing: SenRuSen, MakiFuji, KiyoHanaKiyo, JinKoshJin, MitKo
Warnings: Non-sense chapter. Might be boring, might be interesting. I don't know. Be warned.
Xtra Warnings: I'm dead. This chapter might, or might not be funny at all, depending on how dry my humor is, or how happy you are at the moment. I'm telling you again... I'm dead.
XXtra Warnings: Long chapter, long fic (I think), out-of-this-world pairings... the works.
XXXtra Warnings: Be warned, because this fic's main theme and concept is not for mature readers. But yeah, I think 13-year-olds could be mature enough, but if not... go read some other fic. I won't corrupt your mind.
DiScLaiMErs: Bishies aren't mine... not yours, either, unless you're Takehiko Inoue. And, by any chance, if you *are* Takehiko Inoue... then by golly, I'll worship you! Oh... yeah.. Rukawa's five sisters are mine. Yep... and the plot, too. Though I admit that at first, it looked like '40 Days and 40 Nights'. But don't worry... This fic's different.
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Celibacy
Chapter Four: Five B*****s From Hell
*Ring!*
Rukawa Kaede wanted to DIE.
*Ring!*
"Kaede-love! Answer the phone! And where the hell's my pantyhose?"
*Ring!* *Ring!*
"Kaede, dear, answer the phone, please! I'm fixing the bills!"
*Ring!* *Ring* *Ring!*
"Kaede, you good for nothing lazy bum! Get your ass outta that bed and help here, would you?"
*Ring!* *Ring!* *Ring!* *Ring!*
"Kaede! I think that's Ryota! Answer the phone, would you? I just came out of the shower!"
*Ring!* *Ring!* *Ring!* *Ring!* *Ring!*
"Kaede-niichan! Be happy! You're always so glum!"
Rukawa buried himself further under his black bedsheets, all the while asking Kami-sama why this is happening to him. He's a good man. He's a good citizen. He's been a good son to his deceased parents. Despite all these, he was, at the moment, wondering why he was stuck in a two-storey house with five unbearable sisters.
Was he adopted or something? At the moment, he certainly hoped he was. And if he's lucky and he's *really* adopted, he wished that his real parents would come get him soon. Oh, not that he has anything against his parents, Kami-sama bless their souls, it's just that sometimes, his sisters are too hard to deal with.
Of course, he could leave anytime he wanted to, but he promised his widowed mother right before she died of cancer that he'll always stay with his sisters, what with him being the only man in the family. His mother thought that his sisters, being *female* and *dainty* and whatnot, needed all the protection they can get.
Frankly, Rukawa thought that his sisters were yes, female, but they were *far* from being dainty. And protection? Sure, Rukawa would protect his sisters from burglars or attackers, blah, blah, blah... but who'd protect Rukawa from *them*? It's a good thing their parents are dead, otherwise, they'll die when they saw the real nature of the Rukawa women.
And heaven help him, they're *all* single. Which means they'll be around until... well... until they get married. So yeah, heaven help him. He's got too many problems on his sleeve right now. Good thing that his Miku-neechan and Ayako-neechan will be married soon. Two less bitches in the house.
*Riiiiiiiiiiing!*
"Ka-e-de!" five female voices screamed.
Rukawa's sanity could only hold on for so long. He jerked out of the bed, marched down the stairs, ignored his five fuming sisters, went straight to the living room, and answered the phone.
"What the hell are you calling for, goddamn you?" Rukawa asked, his voice icier than usual. If this was Hanamichi or the others, then by god, he's going to kill them all. Sleep! Oh, precious sleep! Gone... Disturbed. Molested... By this f****** caller.
"Anou... Ohayo," the familiar voice greeted albeit awkwardly. "May I please speak with Rukawa?"
"This is the Rukawa residence, you moron," Rukawa snapped. "We're all Rukawas here."
"Kaede, who's that?" Rukawa Ayako asked as she walked into the room whilst drying her fresh-out-of-the-shower hair.
"It's not Miyagi," was Rukawa's terse reply.
"Oh," Ayako said and headed for the kitchen. But not before going over to Rukawa to give her otouto a quick 'good morning' kiss.
"What do you want?" Rukawa snapped into the phone again after giving his sister an annoyed look.
"Is this Rukawa-kun?"
'Like duh,' Rukawa thought, but held his tongue. "Yes, now what do you want?"
"It's Sendoh."
'Figures,' Rukawa thought. Leave it to this man to turn his whole damn life upside down. Leave it to this man to drag him out of his warm, warm bed, and out into the cold and unnerving presence of his sisters (who are currently surrounding him... where they came from, he doesn't want to know). Leave it to this man to piss him off.
'He's worse than Hanamichi,' was the first thing which crossed Rukawa's harassed mind. He took a deep breath, disentangled himself from his eldest sister's embrace and asked, "What now, Sendoh?"
Rukawa could hear Sendoh clearing his throat before replying, "Well, since it's a wonderful Sunday today, why don't we go over to a park and play one-on-one? It's been a long time since I last held a ball, and I was wondering if you'd humor me for a while and play with me."
"I'm busy," Rukawa snapped.
Across the city, Sendoh sighed into the phone. He couldn't really figure out the intriguing puzzle which is Rukawa. Why, just yesterday afternoon, he was all flirty and friendly, whilst on the drive home last night, and also now, he was cold and distant... pretty much like the Rukawa he knew back then. He wondered what was going on. He thought that maybe Rukawa was suffering from a multiple personality disorder, or something. One moment, he's all glum and snappy and rude. The other, he'd be friendly, and heaven help Sendoh... seductive.
Still, he wanted to spend more time with the guy. Rukawa never failed to catch his attention, even when they were in high school. Back then, he made sure that he exchanged a few, uh, 'pleasantries' with Rukawa at all possible times. Now that he's twenty-six, he's still so interested in Rukawa.
' Not *that* way, though,' Sendoh thought. He's straight. He just wanted to Rukawa to be his friend. That's all. Honest. Yeah.
"Aaaaw, come on, Rukawa-kun," Sendoh urged. "Do play with me. Just like the old days!"
Back into the Rukawa household, it was now Rukawa's turn to sigh. He's wondering why the hell Sendoh was so interested on spending time with him.
Oh.
The nationally-acclaimed pervert was enjoying his advances. Rukawa fought the urge to roll his eyes. 'Oh puh-lease,' he thought. 'It's not as if I wanted to do those.'
"Do play with me, Rukawa-kun!"
"Yadda."
"Please?"
"No."
"Pretty please with sugar on top?"
Rukawa was about to say 'no' again when his eighteen-year-old sister spoke.
"Kaede-niichan, my friends will all be here after lunch," Shinri said in her usual perky manner. "They wanted to interview you or something, what with you being famous and all. They'd love to spend the afternoon with you. Lots of tea, and fun stuff. Would you please entertain them? Pretty please with pink sugar hearts on top?"
Rukawa, for the umpteenth time in his life, congratulated his facial muscles for not betraying his emotions. Tea?! Interview? No way. What was his sister thinking?! He'd rather be stuck with Sendoh than stay here in this house with his sister's perpetually squealing friends.
He calmly turned away from his little sister and said, "On the other hand, Sendoh, maybe I could make it after all."
Shinri pouted.
Sendoh cheered.
Rukawa sighed.
"I'll see you later, Rukawa-kun!" Sendoh happily said. "I'll pick you up at precisely one o'clock later. Is that fine with you?"
"Yeah."
"Okay! Bye!"
"Yeah." And with that, Rukawa practically slammed the phone back to its place. He looked up and saw his five sisters eyeing him in suspicion. Rukawa raised an eyebrow. "What now?"
He studied his sisters carefully, and once again wondered if they're really related by blood.
Rukawa Kirei, twenty-eight years old. Long, black, shiny hair; black, smouldering eyes; full, red lips; pale, pale skin; almost his height; full, but slim figure, and long, long legs. Add in a sultry, bedroom voice. The eldest child of their deceased parents. Changes boyfriends every month. Scared of commitments, but good in flirting and flings. Drop-dead gorgeous.
Rukawa Megumi and Miku. Both twenty-seven years old. Terror twins. Both looked alike in many ways. Brown hair, blue eyes, tanned complexion, a few inches shorter than Rukawa. But the similarities ended there. The two were as different as night and day. Miku was calm, studious, nice, polite and soft-spoken. In other words, the perfect child. But no... underneath that perfection lies a dark dark soul. Her smile may be sweet, but there's always an evil glint in her eyes which made Rukawa's spine crawl each time he looks at her. Engaged to a multi-millionaire which Rukawa doesn't give a damn about. Megumi, on the other hand, was the resident World War commander. Boyish, outgoing, war-freak, sporty, sharp-tongued. Despite her intimidating nature, many boys find her appealing. Like their eldest sister, she changes boyfriends frequently. She hates spineless wimps. Her specialty is making Rukawa Kaede's life a living hell.
Rukawa Ayako, twenty-six years old. Probably Rukawa's most sensible sister... but demanding as hell. She has long, wavy, brown hair, blue eyes [1]; full, pink lips; pale complexion. Engaged to Miyagi Ryota, a close friend of the family. Rukawa always dreaded Ayako's paper fan which always comes out from nowhere and always makes contact with his skull whenever he did something stupid.
Rukawa Shinri... eighteen years old and Rukawa's worst nightmare. Looks exactly like him, except for the doe-shaped, innocent eyes. Always happy. Always perky. Exactly Rukawa's opposite. Sakuragi Hanamichi's protégé.
'Yes,' Rukawa thought. 'I'm adopted.'
"Who's that?" Megumi asked.
"No one."
"The truth, dear," Miku urged with a soft smile... and glinting eyes. Rukawa shivered inwardly.
"Sendoh Akira," Rukawa finally stated.
"Sendoh Akira, love?" Kirei drawled. "Is he your boyfriend? Hmmm?"
Rukawa fought the urge to flinch. Boyfriend? Like hell, he is. No way. "Iie."
"I know him," Ayako stated. "I managed your team back when we were in high school remember? He's your greatest rival. What's he got to do with you now?"
"Nothing," Rukawa replied. 'And none of your business, too.'
"Come on, oniichan, do tell us!" Shinri insisted whilst giving him a huuuuge bear hug. Rukawa's vision started to spin. What the hell's that cologne? He's gonna suffocate, dammit. His sisters were closing in on him.
'Kami-sama, where are my real parents?' he prayed.
As if to answer his prayers... the front door opened...
And in barged Sakuragi Hanamichi.
'Ah hell,' Rukawa thought. 'Heaven *must* hate me a lot.'
"Ohayo, dear cousins!" Sakuragi greeted in his usual boisterous manner. Shinri squealed and ran over to her idol. Sakuragi caught the eighteen-year-old in his arms, lifted her and swung her around. "How's my baby?"
"Still happy and still a genius, oniichan," Shinri said smugly.
Sakuragi laughed and placed Shinri down. Rukawa rolled his eyes. His sister is eighteen years old, dammit. Not some eight-year-old twit. Oh well... it's not as if he could expect those two dimwits to act their ages...
"Oi, Hana-love," Kirei called out, "do you know something about my darling baby brother and a person called Sendoh Akira?"
"Huh? Why?" Sakuragi asked.
"Oh well... this Sendoh person called, and if I'm not mistaken, he'll take Kaede out today," Megumi said.
"Busybody," Rukawa muttered. Megumi started advanced on him, but he waved his hands in surrender and closed his mouth.
"Really? He called?" Sakuragi asked. He turned to Rukawa. "What does he want?"
"He wants me to leave him alone," Rukawa snapped. "So the deal's off."
"Yeah, right. And my dog grew five heads," Sakuragi retorted. "Really, what does he want, Kaede? Tell us."
"Basketball," Rukawa muttered. His sisters' faces fell.
"Really, honey, get a life," Kirei said, suddenly losing interest in the matter. "Basketball, basketball, basketball. Are you happy with that, love?"
"I'm fine, thanks very much," Rukawa mumbled. He plopped down on the sofa and glared at his sisters.
"Oi.. you mean he didn't tell you about my little dare?" Sakuragi asked as he sat down next to Rukawa.
"What dare?" Shinri asked, sitting down next to Sakuragi. All the others found a place to sit as they silently urged Sakuragi to continue.
"I dared this cold bastard to seduce the hell out of Sendoh," Sakuragi simply said.
Kirei's face lit up again. "Now, that's something! Tell us more!"
Rukawa started to stand up, but Megumi sat by his other side and pulled him back down. And yeah... she pinned his legs under hers, so as to prevent any possible attempts of escape. "Tell us more, Hana," she demanded.
Sakuragi was only too happy to comply. "Actually, the real deal goes like this... Virgin Kaede's supposed to get laid within a month. I think his sex life needs a bit more... enhancing."
"You go, cousin!" Megumi cheered. "Didn't know you have a brain 'till now, hehe."
Sakuragi decided to let that remark pass because he really doesn't want to mess with Megumi. He still wanted to live, thanks very much. He cleared his throat and continued his tirade, all the while avoiding Rukawa's ice-cold I'll-kill-you glare.
"That's about it, really," Sakuragi said. "All he needed to do is to get laid within a month... but not with just any guy. He should get it on with Sendoh."
"Why Sendoh, of all people?" Ayako asked.
"No reason at all," Sakuragi replied with a wave of his hand. "Random thoughts, that's all. And yeah... don't you think it's about time Sendoh and Kaede patch things up? They've been on bad terms since they met."
Kirei ran a hand down Rukawa's arm. "I'm happy to give you some tips."
"Kaede won't need those," Sakuragi declared. The women raised an eyebrow at Rukawa, but he ignored them all. Damn them to hell and back.
"Oh well," Kirei sighed out, "if you need any help, you know who to ask, right love?" Kaede merely 'hn'ed.
"It's nearly eleven o'clock, Kaede," Ayako said. "Do prepare lunch for us."
"Why me?"
"Because you're cute," was Shinri's happy reply.
"And what does that have to do with the way you girls harass me?"
"Kaede, dear, we've all got lots of things to do," Miku softly argued. "We would appreciate your help very much."
"Yeah right," Rukawa mumbled.
"Come on, love, do cook for us," Kirei insisted.
Rukawa looked up to five bashful female faces.
... And sighed as he threw Megumi's legs away and walked towards the kitchen, grumbling all the way.
"Could he ever resist anyone of you?" Sakuragi asked with a silly grin.
"Nope," Ayako replied.
"He loves us, that's why," Miku added.
They all grinned at each other when they started to hear banging pots and cupboards.
And that's the usual morning scene in the Rukawa household.
************
Rukawa stepped out of his room and stopped dead on his tracks when he saw his five sisters standing just outside his door. They were all studying him carefully.
"Really, Kaede," Kirei said disapprovingly. "If you're going to seduce someone, put some effort into it."
With that, all five girls shoved him back into his room and locked the door behind them. Rukawa could hear a faint 'Go, cousin!' shout from downstairs.
Since his struggling efforts were futile, he decided to let his sisters have their way. Kirei was fixing his hair, Miku and Megumi (those darn twins) were raiding his closet, Ayako was happy enough to just witness his misery, and Shinri...
Shinri was was putting some creamy bullshit in his face.
"Get off me," Kaede simply said to his two sisters.
"No way, Kaede," Kirei said. "This is the first time I get to see you do this. No way I'm going to just sit down and let you have all the fun. I'm gonna take part in this."
"Me too!" Shinri said while she applied more goob onto Kaede's pale face.
"What the hell are you doing to my face?" Rukawa demanded.
"Why, oniichan... I'm 'beautifying' you!" Shinri replied. Rukawa nearly blanched. "That cream's supposed to soften your face. Baby soft, ummm-hmmm! So when Sendoh-san caresses your face, he's in for a real treat!"
"Real treat, my ass," Rukawa muttered. "Get off me, Shinri, or I'll-"
"You'll do what?" Megumi dared. "That's our baby sister you're talking to, Kaede. Watch your mouth."
"And what the hell are you doing to my clothes?" Rukawa asked the twins.
"We're looking for clothes which will be suitable for the occasion," Miku replied with a soft smile. "Surely you won't deprive us the opportunity to help you, ne, otouto?" And there was that evil gleam.
"No, of course not, Miku-neechan," Rukawa replied. Kirei on the other hand, was making Rukawa's scalp all painful from her ministrations. "Kirei-neechan, what are you doing?"
Kirei sprayed an ample amount of mousse on Kaede's hair before replying. "Men could never resist this wet-look style I'm doing to you. Your hair's gorgeous, like mine. Unruly, too, which makes it all the more oh-so-sexy. All it needs is a little mousse, little pull here, make it a bit more unruly, and voila! You look sexier than ever!"
Rukawa wanted to cry out loud. This was pure torture. He could have had brothers for siblings, but what does he get? Five bitches from hell. What the hell does he have to do with 'beautification' and 'suitable clothes for the occasion', and 'wet-look' bullshit? All he ever wanted was to be the best damn player in the universe. That's not much, is it? His sisters were treating him like a girl, dammit.
Why didn't anyone ask whether or not he wanted to do this, in the first place? It's his damn pride which got him into this mess. Why couldn't anyone tell him what to do with his pride? They knew that he's proud, yeah, but he wanted- needed someone to know that he's not happy with it. If only he could control his pride... then maybe this wouldn't even be happening.
And yeah... if only he had the freakin' guts to tell his sisters to leave him alone and go to hell, *this* wouldn't even be happening.
He's not happy with the way things are going right now. Dammit, he's not a woman! They were treating him like a... a... an overgrown barbie doll, for crying out loud! Rukawa silently prayed that the heavens would strike his sisters with lightning. It would be really helpful.
Suddenly, he wanted Sendoh to arrive soon... and take him away from this house. Not that he wanted Sendoh *that* way. It's just convenient that Sendoh's going to take him away for a while, which means he wouldn't have to bear his sisters' unnerving presences for quite a while. That's all. Honest. Yeah.
Just as he finished donning the clothes which Miku presented him- a plain, sleeveless jersey shirt which discreetly hugs his torso, plus a pair of short basketball shorts-, the doorbell rang. Shinri yelped and ran down, then Rukawa heard a lively 'Hello! You must be Sendoh Akira! Please wait for my brother... he's still preparing himself.'
"There, you look great," Kirei said and gave him a kiss. "Tell me how things went, okay, love? And don't be mad. We don't get the chance to do things with you any longer. You're always away, and if ever you went home, you're always asleep. We missed you, Kaede."
Rukawa stayed silent. Kirei gave him one last kiss and walked out of the room. Miku did the same, while Megumi just gave him a friendly punch before leaving him alone with Ayako.
Ayako was studying her brother. She never uttered a word all throughout the entire ordeal. She just laughed when the situation calls for it, just helped whenever her sisters asked for it, and gave opinions when needed, but never did she help them, uh, 'beautify' Rukawa. And now, alone in the room with Rukawa, she was just giving the latter a strange look.
"Nanda, neechan?" Rukawa asked.
"Are you okay with this?" Ayako asked. Straight to the point.
"What... the dare or this beauty bullshit?"
"Both."
"The dare... no. This beauty bullshit... no."
"Then why?"
"Pride and respect for my sisters, respectively."
"Respect for the sisters, I could understand. But pride?" Ayako scoffed. "One day, it'll get you in trouble, otouto."
"I think that's what it's doing now."
"Then why won't you stop?"
"I'm not a chicken."
"And you're not happy, either," Ayako snapped. "Sendoh... is he okay with you?"
"The moron? He's okay... I guess."
"Does he make you happy?"
"He's okay."
Ayako went over to him and gave him a quick hug. "Whatever you do is fine with me, Kaede," she said. "You're twenty-five years old. You're a grown man now. Do what you want to do. But I want you to know this..."
"What?"
"I want you to be happy, Kaede," Ayako said. "Start living. Stop letting life pass by right in front of your eyes. Be happy, okay?"
Rukawa gave his sister a strange but grateful look. Ayako seemed satisfied with that and left him alone to ponder with his thoughts. Happy... everyone wanted him to be happy. Why do they care anyway? Wasn't he happy with the way things are right now?
'With this mundane existence? No, maybe not,' Rukawa thought. 'Maybe I should give Sendoh a try.'
"Oi! You little imp! Get your ass down here. Your date wouldn't wait all day, you know!" Megumi bellowed from downstairs. Rukawa sighed. He checked himself at the mirror and tried to wipe away the creamy gook which Shinri plastered all over his face. Sendoh Akira could wait. There's no way he's going downstairs looking like a woman.
Downstairs, Sendoh was glad that he vowed to keep away from women. He was also glad that he turned *all* his attentions, he preferences, his *everything* to Rukawa Kaede. He was also glad that he decided to change his perverted ways. He was also soooo glad that these women are Rukawa's sisters... meaning... they're all 'hands off' women. Otherwise... he'll be in bed with one of these women tonight. Or better yet... NOW.
Damn, but Rukawa has oh-so-gorgeous sisters. Sendoh never knew that Rukawa had any other sisters other than Ayako. They're all simply irresistible, especially Kirei. Sendoh had his hands full right from the moment he stepped into this house. Kirei was oozing with sensuality. Thank heavens for his newfound purpose in life. If he'd met Kirei days ago... damn, he didn't want to think about it.
"Fancy seeing you again, Sendoh Akira," Ayako greeted as she entered the living room.
"Ayako-sempai!" Sendoh exclaimed. His face brightened at the sight of the his former team's manageress. "It's been so long. How are you doing?"
"Fine, thank you," Ayako replied. "Kaede'll be here shortly. He's still upstairs- er, uh, -gathering his things. And his thoughts."
"Oh, I don't mind," Sendoh said.
"Oi... Smiley! What's with you today? Why did you ask Rukawa out?" Sakuragi asked.
"Nothing," Sendoh replied. "Just wanna bring back the old days. Without the animosity, of course."
Sakuragi was about to reply when the door suddenly opened and in strolled a medium-built man with curly brown hair and a stud on his left ear. "Oi! Ryochin! Fancy meeting you here! Still a shorty, I see."
"Miyagi Ryota," Sendoh Akira acknowledged. "Marine biologist, right? I saw you on TV."
"And he specializes on squids [2], too," Sakuragi snickered.
Miyagi gave Sakuragi a dirty glare before going over to Ayako to give her a kiss. "I'm back, sweetheart," he said. Ayako merely smiled as she gave her bethroted a quick peck on the cheek. "Oi... Sendoh Akira? What brings you here? It's been a long time since I last saw you. I think that was... uh... your last game since I last saw you." He turned to Sakuragi. "And it's not just squids, Hana. I study *giant* squids. They're rare."
Sakuragi wasn't listening. He was too busy laughing his head off.
"Squids!" he exclaimed before he drowned himself into another round of laughter. But not until Ayako graced her with her infamous paper fan. Sendoh gave out a small laugh.
But his breath stopped all together when a disgruntled-looking Rukawa walked into the living room. He was wearing a blue sleeveless jersey shirt which was a little too tight for him... thereby enhancing his muscled torso. His shorts... were a bit too short for Sendoh's sanity. And by gods, his normally pale cheeks was a bit... livelier. His hair... Kami-sama... the hair. A wild, wet, mess.
'By gods, he has no right to be *that* beautiful,' Sendoh thought. He exerted a huge effort in preventing himself from pouncing Rukawa and ravishing that pink, pouting mouth of his.
'By gods, if he doesn't stop looking at me that way, I swear I'll shove a butcher knife down his throat,' Rukawa thought. He exerted a huge effort in preventing himself to run to the kitchen and get the largest butcher knife in the cupboard.
"Oi, Kaede!" Miyagi greeted.
Rukawa diverted his attention towards the new comer. "Mr.Squid," he simply said in his usual monotone. But of course he got a 'reward' from his Ayako-neesan, too. He rubbed the attacked area as he gave his future brother-in-law a more decent greeting and asked him how he's doing.
"Oh, the squids are fine, and so am I," Miyagi replied. Rukawa nodded his head and turned to Sendoh.
"Let's go," he simply said.
Sendoh was stil too astounded to reply, so he just stood up and walked towards the door. Until Kirei's long, long leg blocked his way.
"Do stay for tea," she purred. She stood up, went to Kaede, wrapped her arm around her brother's waist and gave Sendoh her infamous bedroom stare. "Kaede's tea could knock you senseless, ne, otouto?" She squeezed Rukawa's waist in order for him to reply.
"Whatever," Rukawa muttered. Sakuragi threw him another 'chicken' look. Rukawa glared at him before turning back to Sendoh... with that same bedroom stare that her sister gave Sendoh. "Yes, Sendoh... I do make quite good tea. But I'd rather have tea with you... alone."
Megumi and Sakuragi, for reasons unbeknownst to Sendoh and Miyagi, suddenly cheered and laughed.
"My, my... Kaede's all grown-up now," Miku said with a fake sniffle.
'Oh, crawl in a hole and die,' Rukawa thought. 'Grown-up my ass.'
"My oniichan is very, very quiet," Shinri started, "but when he talks... very profound things come out of his mouth. Let's have an example, oniichan!"
Rukawa gave her a shut-up-stare. Shinri just smiled.
"Come on, oniichan... we need your profound words of wisdom!"
"Do'aho."
"And there you have it!" Shinri exclaimed. "Very profound, is it not, Sendoh-kun?"
Sendoh sweatdropped. "Ah... yeah."
"And Kaede's a good dancer too," Megumi said. "Go give us an example, baka."
"You wish."
Megumi crunched her knuckles.
Rukawa placed his hands on his waist and swayed left and right. "There," he said.
Sakuragi and Megumi laughed.
Rukawa fumed. He had to get away from these lunatics. He had to get away from this house. Now.
He grabbed Sendoh by his collar and pulled him outside. Sakuragi and the women gave out catcalls and whistles. Miyagi, not knowing what to do, just joined the others in their ruckus.
"Don't come home till the morning after!" Megumi called out. Rukawa raised 'the finger' before getting into Sendoh's car and snapping his seatbelt on. Sendoh, too befuddled for words, just got into his car and started the engine.
"Oi... Sendoh."
"Yes, Rukawa-kun?"
"Thanks."
Sendoh's head snapped towards Rukawa's direction, but the latter was just looking straight ahead, his face unreadable.
"For what?" Sendoh asked.
"For taking me away."
*********
tsu.zu.ku
*********
[1] I'm not sure if Ayako's eyes are *really* blue... so... there.
[2] About the squid part... I just watched this documentary about this marine biologist who studies giant squids. His lab's full of squids... blah, blah, blah... and I can't help but write it here. And Miyagi, too... *snicker*... The concept is too hilarious and so unnerving, that I have to write it down. Sorry to all the Miyagi fans out there! And yeah... to the marine bilogists who study squids... I have nothing against you. Heaven's truth, I was captivated by that documentary.
Is it just me, or am I really losing my touch, right? Tell me the truth, or else... *crunches knuckles*
I think the genre will change, too. I'm not sure about this, though. This fic is light, yeah, and has lots of humor, but... oh well.. we'll see! And I promise that the next chapter would be more... lively. Hehe...
Sorry if this chapter's overdue. Got lots of things to do. I'll try to update faster.
Lastly... this chapter is for Vero, Dinara, Miracle, and Hibiki-chan. I don't know how to reach you... so... I'll give this chapter to you... ^____^
by Aki Midori
Rating: PG-13... lots of stuff which shouldn't be read by people under the age of thirteen. The concept of the fic itself is pretty much for mature readers only, yet, this fic is not that graphic as to rate it R. So I'll stick to PG-13
Pairing: SenRuSen, MakiFuji, KiyoHanaKiyo, JinKoshJin, MitKo
Warnings: Non-sense chapter. Might be boring, might be interesting. I don't know. Be warned.
Xtra Warnings: I'm dead. This chapter might, or might not be funny at all, depending on how dry my humor is, or how happy you are at the moment. I'm telling you again... I'm dead.
XXtra Warnings: Long chapter, long fic (I think), out-of-this-world pairings... the works.
XXXtra Warnings: Be warned, because this fic's main theme and concept is not for mature readers. But yeah, I think 13-year-olds could be mature enough, but if not... go read some other fic. I won't corrupt your mind.
DiScLaiMErs: Bishies aren't mine... not yours, either, unless you're Takehiko Inoue. And, by any chance, if you *are* Takehiko Inoue... then by golly, I'll worship you! Oh... yeah.. Rukawa's five sisters are mine. Yep... and the plot, too. Though I admit that at first, it looked like '40 Days and 40 Nights'. But don't worry... This fic's different.
------------------------
Celibacy
Chapter Four: Five B*****s From Hell
*Ring!*
Rukawa Kaede wanted to DIE.
*Ring!*
"Kaede-love! Answer the phone! And where the hell's my pantyhose?"
*Ring!* *Ring!*
"Kaede, dear, answer the phone, please! I'm fixing the bills!"
*Ring!* *Ring* *Ring!*
"Kaede, you good for nothing lazy bum! Get your ass outta that bed and help here, would you?"
*Ring!* *Ring!* *Ring!* *Ring!*
"Kaede! I think that's Ryota! Answer the phone, would you? I just came out of the shower!"
*Ring!* *Ring!* *Ring!* *Ring!* *Ring!*
"Kaede-niichan! Be happy! You're always so glum!"
Rukawa buried himself further under his black bedsheets, all the while asking Kami-sama why this is happening to him. He's a good man. He's a good citizen. He's been a good son to his deceased parents. Despite all these, he was, at the moment, wondering why he was stuck in a two-storey house with five unbearable sisters.
Was he adopted or something? At the moment, he certainly hoped he was. And if he's lucky and he's *really* adopted, he wished that his real parents would come get him soon. Oh, not that he has anything against his parents, Kami-sama bless their souls, it's just that sometimes, his sisters are too hard to deal with.
Of course, he could leave anytime he wanted to, but he promised his widowed mother right before she died of cancer that he'll always stay with his sisters, what with him being the only man in the family. His mother thought that his sisters, being *female* and *dainty* and whatnot, needed all the protection they can get.
Frankly, Rukawa thought that his sisters were yes, female, but they were *far* from being dainty. And protection? Sure, Rukawa would protect his sisters from burglars or attackers, blah, blah, blah... but who'd protect Rukawa from *them*? It's a good thing their parents are dead, otherwise, they'll die when they saw the real nature of the Rukawa women.
And heaven help him, they're *all* single. Which means they'll be around until... well... until they get married. So yeah, heaven help him. He's got too many problems on his sleeve right now. Good thing that his Miku-neechan and Ayako-neechan will be married soon. Two less bitches in the house.
*Riiiiiiiiiiing!*
"Ka-e-de!" five female voices screamed.
Rukawa's sanity could only hold on for so long. He jerked out of the bed, marched down the stairs, ignored his five fuming sisters, went straight to the living room, and answered the phone.
"What the hell are you calling for, goddamn you?" Rukawa asked, his voice icier than usual. If this was Hanamichi or the others, then by god, he's going to kill them all. Sleep! Oh, precious sleep! Gone... Disturbed. Molested... By this f****** caller.
"Anou... Ohayo," the familiar voice greeted albeit awkwardly. "May I please speak with Rukawa?"
"This is the Rukawa residence, you moron," Rukawa snapped. "We're all Rukawas here."
"Kaede, who's that?" Rukawa Ayako asked as she walked into the room whilst drying her fresh-out-of-the-shower hair.
"It's not Miyagi," was Rukawa's terse reply.
"Oh," Ayako said and headed for the kitchen. But not before going over to Rukawa to give her otouto a quick 'good morning' kiss.
"What do you want?" Rukawa snapped into the phone again after giving his sister an annoyed look.
"Is this Rukawa-kun?"
'Like duh,' Rukawa thought, but held his tongue. "Yes, now what do you want?"
"It's Sendoh."
'Figures,' Rukawa thought. Leave it to this man to turn his whole damn life upside down. Leave it to this man to drag him out of his warm, warm bed, and out into the cold and unnerving presence of his sisters (who are currently surrounding him... where they came from, he doesn't want to know). Leave it to this man to piss him off.
'He's worse than Hanamichi,' was the first thing which crossed Rukawa's harassed mind. He took a deep breath, disentangled himself from his eldest sister's embrace and asked, "What now, Sendoh?"
Rukawa could hear Sendoh clearing his throat before replying, "Well, since it's a wonderful Sunday today, why don't we go over to a park and play one-on-one? It's been a long time since I last held a ball, and I was wondering if you'd humor me for a while and play with me."
"I'm busy," Rukawa snapped.
Across the city, Sendoh sighed into the phone. He couldn't really figure out the intriguing puzzle which is Rukawa. Why, just yesterday afternoon, he was all flirty and friendly, whilst on the drive home last night, and also now, he was cold and distant... pretty much like the Rukawa he knew back then. He wondered what was going on. He thought that maybe Rukawa was suffering from a multiple personality disorder, or something. One moment, he's all glum and snappy and rude. The other, he'd be friendly, and heaven help Sendoh... seductive.
Still, he wanted to spend more time with the guy. Rukawa never failed to catch his attention, even when they were in high school. Back then, he made sure that he exchanged a few, uh, 'pleasantries' with Rukawa at all possible times. Now that he's twenty-six, he's still so interested in Rukawa.
' Not *that* way, though,' Sendoh thought. He's straight. He just wanted to Rukawa to be his friend. That's all. Honest. Yeah.
"Aaaaw, come on, Rukawa-kun," Sendoh urged. "Do play with me. Just like the old days!"
Back into the Rukawa household, it was now Rukawa's turn to sigh. He's wondering why the hell Sendoh was so interested on spending time with him.
Oh.
The nationally-acclaimed pervert was enjoying his advances. Rukawa fought the urge to roll his eyes. 'Oh puh-lease,' he thought. 'It's not as if I wanted to do those.'
"Do play with me, Rukawa-kun!"
"Yadda."
"Please?"
"No."
"Pretty please with sugar on top?"
Rukawa was about to say 'no' again when his eighteen-year-old sister spoke.
"Kaede-niichan, my friends will all be here after lunch," Shinri said in her usual perky manner. "They wanted to interview you or something, what with you being famous and all. They'd love to spend the afternoon with you. Lots of tea, and fun stuff. Would you please entertain them? Pretty please with pink sugar hearts on top?"
Rukawa, for the umpteenth time in his life, congratulated his facial muscles for not betraying his emotions. Tea?! Interview? No way. What was his sister thinking?! He'd rather be stuck with Sendoh than stay here in this house with his sister's perpetually squealing friends.
He calmly turned away from his little sister and said, "On the other hand, Sendoh, maybe I could make it after all."
Shinri pouted.
Sendoh cheered.
Rukawa sighed.
"I'll see you later, Rukawa-kun!" Sendoh happily said. "I'll pick you up at precisely one o'clock later. Is that fine with you?"
"Yeah."
"Okay! Bye!"
"Yeah." And with that, Rukawa practically slammed the phone back to its place. He looked up and saw his five sisters eyeing him in suspicion. Rukawa raised an eyebrow. "What now?"
He studied his sisters carefully, and once again wondered if they're really related by blood.
Rukawa Kirei, twenty-eight years old. Long, black, shiny hair; black, smouldering eyes; full, red lips; pale, pale skin; almost his height; full, but slim figure, and long, long legs. Add in a sultry, bedroom voice. The eldest child of their deceased parents. Changes boyfriends every month. Scared of commitments, but good in flirting and flings. Drop-dead gorgeous.
Rukawa Megumi and Miku. Both twenty-seven years old. Terror twins. Both looked alike in many ways. Brown hair, blue eyes, tanned complexion, a few inches shorter than Rukawa. But the similarities ended there. The two were as different as night and day. Miku was calm, studious, nice, polite and soft-spoken. In other words, the perfect child. But no... underneath that perfection lies a dark dark soul. Her smile may be sweet, but there's always an evil glint in her eyes which made Rukawa's spine crawl each time he looks at her. Engaged to a multi-millionaire which Rukawa doesn't give a damn about. Megumi, on the other hand, was the resident World War commander. Boyish, outgoing, war-freak, sporty, sharp-tongued. Despite her intimidating nature, many boys find her appealing. Like their eldest sister, she changes boyfriends frequently. She hates spineless wimps. Her specialty is making Rukawa Kaede's life a living hell.
Rukawa Ayako, twenty-six years old. Probably Rukawa's most sensible sister... but demanding as hell. She has long, wavy, brown hair, blue eyes [1]; full, pink lips; pale complexion. Engaged to Miyagi Ryota, a close friend of the family. Rukawa always dreaded Ayako's paper fan which always comes out from nowhere and always makes contact with his skull whenever he did something stupid.
Rukawa Shinri... eighteen years old and Rukawa's worst nightmare. Looks exactly like him, except for the doe-shaped, innocent eyes. Always happy. Always perky. Exactly Rukawa's opposite. Sakuragi Hanamichi's protégé.
'Yes,' Rukawa thought. 'I'm adopted.'
"Who's that?" Megumi asked.
"No one."
"The truth, dear," Miku urged with a soft smile... and glinting eyes. Rukawa shivered inwardly.
"Sendoh Akira," Rukawa finally stated.
"Sendoh Akira, love?" Kirei drawled. "Is he your boyfriend? Hmmm?"
Rukawa fought the urge to flinch. Boyfriend? Like hell, he is. No way. "Iie."
"I know him," Ayako stated. "I managed your team back when we were in high school remember? He's your greatest rival. What's he got to do with you now?"
"Nothing," Rukawa replied. 'And none of your business, too.'
"Come on, oniichan, do tell us!" Shinri insisted whilst giving him a huuuuge bear hug. Rukawa's vision started to spin. What the hell's that cologne? He's gonna suffocate, dammit. His sisters were closing in on him.
'Kami-sama, where are my real parents?' he prayed.
As if to answer his prayers... the front door opened...
And in barged Sakuragi Hanamichi.
'Ah hell,' Rukawa thought. 'Heaven *must* hate me a lot.'
"Ohayo, dear cousins!" Sakuragi greeted in his usual boisterous manner. Shinri squealed and ran over to her idol. Sakuragi caught the eighteen-year-old in his arms, lifted her and swung her around. "How's my baby?"
"Still happy and still a genius, oniichan," Shinri said smugly.
Sakuragi laughed and placed Shinri down. Rukawa rolled his eyes. His sister is eighteen years old, dammit. Not some eight-year-old twit. Oh well... it's not as if he could expect those two dimwits to act their ages...
"Oi, Hana-love," Kirei called out, "do you know something about my darling baby brother and a person called Sendoh Akira?"
"Huh? Why?" Sakuragi asked.
"Oh well... this Sendoh person called, and if I'm not mistaken, he'll take Kaede out today," Megumi said.
"Busybody," Rukawa muttered. Megumi started advanced on him, but he waved his hands in surrender and closed his mouth.
"Really? He called?" Sakuragi asked. He turned to Rukawa. "What does he want?"
"He wants me to leave him alone," Rukawa snapped. "So the deal's off."
"Yeah, right. And my dog grew five heads," Sakuragi retorted. "Really, what does he want, Kaede? Tell us."
"Basketball," Rukawa muttered. His sisters' faces fell.
"Really, honey, get a life," Kirei said, suddenly losing interest in the matter. "Basketball, basketball, basketball. Are you happy with that, love?"
"I'm fine, thanks very much," Rukawa mumbled. He plopped down on the sofa and glared at his sisters.
"Oi.. you mean he didn't tell you about my little dare?" Sakuragi asked as he sat down next to Rukawa.
"What dare?" Shinri asked, sitting down next to Sakuragi. All the others found a place to sit as they silently urged Sakuragi to continue.
"I dared this cold bastard to seduce the hell out of Sendoh," Sakuragi simply said.
Kirei's face lit up again. "Now, that's something! Tell us more!"
Rukawa started to stand up, but Megumi sat by his other side and pulled him back down. And yeah... she pinned his legs under hers, so as to prevent any possible attempts of escape. "Tell us more, Hana," she demanded.
Sakuragi was only too happy to comply. "Actually, the real deal goes like this... Virgin Kaede's supposed to get laid within a month. I think his sex life needs a bit more... enhancing."
"You go, cousin!" Megumi cheered. "Didn't know you have a brain 'till now, hehe."
Sakuragi decided to let that remark pass because he really doesn't want to mess with Megumi. He still wanted to live, thanks very much. He cleared his throat and continued his tirade, all the while avoiding Rukawa's ice-cold I'll-kill-you glare.
"That's about it, really," Sakuragi said. "All he needed to do is to get laid within a month... but not with just any guy. He should get it on with Sendoh."
"Why Sendoh, of all people?" Ayako asked.
"No reason at all," Sakuragi replied with a wave of his hand. "Random thoughts, that's all. And yeah... don't you think it's about time Sendoh and Kaede patch things up? They've been on bad terms since they met."
Kirei ran a hand down Rukawa's arm. "I'm happy to give you some tips."
"Kaede won't need those," Sakuragi declared. The women raised an eyebrow at Rukawa, but he ignored them all. Damn them to hell and back.
"Oh well," Kirei sighed out, "if you need any help, you know who to ask, right love?" Kaede merely 'hn'ed.
"It's nearly eleven o'clock, Kaede," Ayako said. "Do prepare lunch for us."
"Why me?"
"Because you're cute," was Shinri's happy reply.
"And what does that have to do with the way you girls harass me?"
"Kaede, dear, we've all got lots of things to do," Miku softly argued. "We would appreciate your help very much."
"Yeah right," Rukawa mumbled.
"Come on, love, do cook for us," Kirei insisted.
Rukawa looked up to five bashful female faces.
... And sighed as he threw Megumi's legs away and walked towards the kitchen, grumbling all the way.
"Could he ever resist anyone of you?" Sakuragi asked with a silly grin.
"Nope," Ayako replied.
"He loves us, that's why," Miku added.
They all grinned at each other when they started to hear banging pots and cupboards.
And that's the usual morning scene in the Rukawa household.
************
Rukawa stepped out of his room and stopped dead on his tracks when he saw his five sisters standing just outside his door. They were all studying him carefully.
"Really, Kaede," Kirei said disapprovingly. "If you're going to seduce someone, put some effort into it."
With that, all five girls shoved him back into his room and locked the door behind them. Rukawa could hear a faint 'Go, cousin!' shout from downstairs.
Since his struggling efforts were futile, he decided to let his sisters have their way. Kirei was fixing his hair, Miku and Megumi (those darn twins) were raiding his closet, Ayako was happy enough to just witness his misery, and Shinri...
Shinri was was putting some creamy bullshit in his face.
"Get off me," Kaede simply said to his two sisters.
"No way, Kaede," Kirei said. "This is the first time I get to see you do this. No way I'm going to just sit down and let you have all the fun. I'm gonna take part in this."
"Me too!" Shinri said while she applied more goob onto Kaede's pale face.
"What the hell are you doing to my face?" Rukawa demanded.
"Why, oniichan... I'm 'beautifying' you!" Shinri replied. Rukawa nearly blanched. "That cream's supposed to soften your face. Baby soft, ummm-hmmm! So when Sendoh-san caresses your face, he's in for a real treat!"
"Real treat, my ass," Rukawa muttered. "Get off me, Shinri, or I'll-"
"You'll do what?" Megumi dared. "That's our baby sister you're talking to, Kaede. Watch your mouth."
"And what the hell are you doing to my clothes?" Rukawa asked the twins.
"We're looking for clothes which will be suitable for the occasion," Miku replied with a soft smile. "Surely you won't deprive us the opportunity to help you, ne, otouto?" And there was that evil gleam.
"No, of course not, Miku-neechan," Rukawa replied. Kirei on the other hand, was making Rukawa's scalp all painful from her ministrations. "Kirei-neechan, what are you doing?"
Kirei sprayed an ample amount of mousse on Kaede's hair before replying. "Men could never resist this wet-look style I'm doing to you. Your hair's gorgeous, like mine. Unruly, too, which makes it all the more oh-so-sexy. All it needs is a little mousse, little pull here, make it a bit more unruly, and voila! You look sexier than ever!"
Rukawa wanted to cry out loud. This was pure torture. He could have had brothers for siblings, but what does he get? Five bitches from hell. What the hell does he have to do with 'beautification' and 'suitable clothes for the occasion', and 'wet-look' bullshit? All he ever wanted was to be the best damn player in the universe. That's not much, is it? His sisters were treating him like a girl, dammit.
Why didn't anyone ask whether or not he wanted to do this, in the first place? It's his damn pride which got him into this mess. Why couldn't anyone tell him what to do with his pride? They knew that he's proud, yeah, but he wanted- needed someone to know that he's not happy with it. If only he could control his pride... then maybe this wouldn't even be happening.
And yeah... if only he had the freakin' guts to tell his sisters to leave him alone and go to hell, *this* wouldn't even be happening.
He's not happy with the way things are going right now. Dammit, he's not a woman! They were treating him like a... a... an overgrown barbie doll, for crying out loud! Rukawa silently prayed that the heavens would strike his sisters with lightning. It would be really helpful.
Suddenly, he wanted Sendoh to arrive soon... and take him away from this house. Not that he wanted Sendoh *that* way. It's just convenient that Sendoh's going to take him away for a while, which means he wouldn't have to bear his sisters' unnerving presences for quite a while. That's all. Honest. Yeah.
Just as he finished donning the clothes which Miku presented him- a plain, sleeveless jersey shirt which discreetly hugs his torso, plus a pair of short basketball shorts-, the doorbell rang. Shinri yelped and ran down, then Rukawa heard a lively 'Hello! You must be Sendoh Akira! Please wait for my brother... he's still preparing himself.'
"There, you look great," Kirei said and gave him a kiss. "Tell me how things went, okay, love? And don't be mad. We don't get the chance to do things with you any longer. You're always away, and if ever you went home, you're always asleep. We missed you, Kaede."
Rukawa stayed silent. Kirei gave him one last kiss and walked out of the room. Miku did the same, while Megumi just gave him a friendly punch before leaving him alone with Ayako.
Ayako was studying her brother. She never uttered a word all throughout the entire ordeal. She just laughed when the situation calls for it, just helped whenever her sisters asked for it, and gave opinions when needed, but never did she help them, uh, 'beautify' Rukawa. And now, alone in the room with Rukawa, she was just giving the latter a strange look.
"Nanda, neechan?" Rukawa asked.
"Are you okay with this?" Ayako asked. Straight to the point.
"What... the dare or this beauty bullshit?"
"Both."
"The dare... no. This beauty bullshit... no."
"Then why?"
"Pride and respect for my sisters, respectively."
"Respect for the sisters, I could understand. But pride?" Ayako scoffed. "One day, it'll get you in trouble, otouto."
"I think that's what it's doing now."
"Then why won't you stop?"
"I'm not a chicken."
"And you're not happy, either," Ayako snapped. "Sendoh... is he okay with you?"
"The moron? He's okay... I guess."
"Does he make you happy?"
"He's okay."
Ayako went over to him and gave him a quick hug. "Whatever you do is fine with me, Kaede," she said. "You're twenty-five years old. You're a grown man now. Do what you want to do. But I want you to know this..."
"What?"
"I want you to be happy, Kaede," Ayako said. "Start living. Stop letting life pass by right in front of your eyes. Be happy, okay?"
Rukawa gave his sister a strange but grateful look. Ayako seemed satisfied with that and left him alone to ponder with his thoughts. Happy... everyone wanted him to be happy. Why do they care anyway? Wasn't he happy with the way things are right now?
'With this mundane existence? No, maybe not,' Rukawa thought. 'Maybe I should give Sendoh a try.'
"Oi! You little imp! Get your ass down here. Your date wouldn't wait all day, you know!" Megumi bellowed from downstairs. Rukawa sighed. He checked himself at the mirror and tried to wipe away the creamy gook which Shinri plastered all over his face. Sendoh Akira could wait. There's no way he's going downstairs looking like a woman.
Downstairs, Sendoh was glad that he vowed to keep away from women. He was also glad that he turned *all* his attentions, he preferences, his *everything* to Rukawa Kaede. He was also glad that he decided to change his perverted ways. He was also soooo glad that these women are Rukawa's sisters... meaning... they're all 'hands off' women. Otherwise... he'll be in bed with one of these women tonight. Or better yet... NOW.
Damn, but Rukawa has oh-so-gorgeous sisters. Sendoh never knew that Rukawa had any other sisters other than Ayako. They're all simply irresistible, especially Kirei. Sendoh had his hands full right from the moment he stepped into this house. Kirei was oozing with sensuality. Thank heavens for his newfound purpose in life. If he'd met Kirei days ago... damn, he didn't want to think about it.
"Fancy seeing you again, Sendoh Akira," Ayako greeted as she entered the living room.
"Ayako-sempai!" Sendoh exclaimed. His face brightened at the sight of the his former team's manageress. "It's been so long. How are you doing?"
"Fine, thank you," Ayako replied. "Kaede'll be here shortly. He's still upstairs- er, uh, -gathering his things. And his thoughts."
"Oh, I don't mind," Sendoh said.
"Oi... Smiley! What's with you today? Why did you ask Rukawa out?" Sakuragi asked.
"Nothing," Sendoh replied. "Just wanna bring back the old days. Without the animosity, of course."
Sakuragi was about to reply when the door suddenly opened and in strolled a medium-built man with curly brown hair and a stud on his left ear. "Oi! Ryochin! Fancy meeting you here! Still a shorty, I see."
"Miyagi Ryota," Sendoh Akira acknowledged. "Marine biologist, right? I saw you on TV."
"And he specializes on squids [2], too," Sakuragi snickered.
Miyagi gave Sakuragi a dirty glare before going over to Ayako to give her a kiss. "I'm back, sweetheart," he said. Ayako merely smiled as she gave her bethroted a quick peck on the cheek. "Oi... Sendoh Akira? What brings you here? It's been a long time since I last saw you. I think that was... uh... your last game since I last saw you." He turned to Sakuragi. "And it's not just squids, Hana. I study *giant* squids. They're rare."
Sakuragi wasn't listening. He was too busy laughing his head off.
"Squids!" he exclaimed before he drowned himself into another round of laughter. But not until Ayako graced her with her infamous paper fan. Sendoh gave out a small laugh.
But his breath stopped all together when a disgruntled-looking Rukawa walked into the living room. He was wearing a blue sleeveless jersey shirt which was a little too tight for him... thereby enhancing his muscled torso. His shorts... were a bit too short for Sendoh's sanity. And by gods, his normally pale cheeks was a bit... livelier. His hair... Kami-sama... the hair. A wild, wet, mess.
'By gods, he has no right to be *that* beautiful,' Sendoh thought. He exerted a huge effort in preventing himself from pouncing Rukawa and ravishing that pink, pouting mouth of his.
'By gods, if he doesn't stop looking at me that way, I swear I'll shove a butcher knife down his throat,' Rukawa thought. He exerted a huge effort in preventing himself to run to the kitchen and get the largest butcher knife in the cupboard.
"Oi, Kaede!" Miyagi greeted.
Rukawa diverted his attention towards the new comer. "Mr.Squid," he simply said in his usual monotone. But of course he got a 'reward' from his Ayako-neesan, too. He rubbed the attacked area as he gave his future brother-in-law a more decent greeting and asked him how he's doing.
"Oh, the squids are fine, and so am I," Miyagi replied. Rukawa nodded his head and turned to Sendoh.
"Let's go," he simply said.
Sendoh was stil too astounded to reply, so he just stood up and walked towards the door. Until Kirei's long, long leg blocked his way.
"Do stay for tea," she purred. She stood up, went to Kaede, wrapped her arm around her brother's waist and gave Sendoh her infamous bedroom stare. "Kaede's tea could knock you senseless, ne, otouto?" She squeezed Rukawa's waist in order for him to reply.
"Whatever," Rukawa muttered. Sakuragi threw him another 'chicken' look. Rukawa glared at him before turning back to Sendoh... with that same bedroom stare that her sister gave Sendoh. "Yes, Sendoh... I do make quite good tea. But I'd rather have tea with you... alone."
Megumi and Sakuragi, for reasons unbeknownst to Sendoh and Miyagi, suddenly cheered and laughed.
"My, my... Kaede's all grown-up now," Miku said with a fake sniffle.
'Oh, crawl in a hole and die,' Rukawa thought. 'Grown-up my ass.'
"My oniichan is very, very quiet," Shinri started, "but when he talks... very profound things come out of his mouth. Let's have an example, oniichan!"
Rukawa gave her a shut-up-stare. Shinri just smiled.
"Come on, oniichan... we need your profound words of wisdom!"
"Do'aho."
"And there you have it!" Shinri exclaimed. "Very profound, is it not, Sendoh-kun?"
Sendoh sweatdropped. "Ah... yeah."
"And Kaede's a good dancer too," Megumi said. "Go give us an example, baka."
"You wish."
Megumi crunched her knuckles.
Rukawa placed his hands on his waist and swayed left and right. "There," he said.
Sakuragi and Megumi laughed.
Rukawa fumed. He had to get away from these lunatics. He had to get away from this house. Now.
He grabbed Sendoh by his collar and pulled him outside. Sakuragi and the women gave out catcalls and whistles. Miyagi, not knowing what to do, just joined the others in their ruckus.
"Don't come home till the morning after!" Megumi called out. Rukawa raised 'the finger' before getting into Sendoh's car and snapping his seatbelt on. Sendoh, too befuddled for words, just got into his car and started the engine.
"Oi... Sendoh."
"Yes, Rukawa-kun?"
"Thanks."
Sendoh's head snapped towards Rukawa's direction, but the latter was just looking straight ahead, his face unreadable.
"For what?" Sendoh asked.
"For taking me away."
*********
tsu.zu.ku
*********
[1] I'm not sure if Ayako's eyes are *really* blue... so... there.
[2] About the squid part... I just watched this documentary about this marine biologist who studies giant squids. His lab's full of squids... blah, blah, blah... and I can't help but write it here. And Miyagi, too... *snicker*... The concept is too hilarious and so unnerving, that I have to write it down. Sorry to all the Miyagi fans out there! And yeah... to the marine bilogists who study squids... I have nothing against you. Heaven's truth, I was captivated by that documentary.
Is it just me, or am I really losing my touch, right? Tell me the truth, or else... *crunches knuckles*
I think the genre will change, too. I'm not sure about this, though. This fic is light, yeah, and has lots of humor, but... oh well.. we'll see! And I promise that the next chapter would be more... lively. Hehe...
Sorry if this chapter's overdue. Got lots of things to do. I'll try to update faster.
Lastly... this chapter is for Vero, Dinara, Miracle, and Hibiki-chan. I don't know how to reach you... so... I'll give this chapter to you... ^____^