Chapter 19: You actually stopped to ask for directions

Disclaimer: I hate disclaimers because it's only saying the obvious. I mean my name isn't Masashi Kishimoto.

The group had a soft landing that was followed by a not so soft welcome from a boar demon with a naginata (spear with a long curved blade). Keiji dodged the boar easily, but couldn't move away from the poison that shot out of the blade.

"Shit," exclaimed Anko. "Are you all right Keiji-kun?"

"Yeah Anko-chan," said Keiji, a bit dazed. "I'm fine, just give me a minute."

But he wouldn't get a minute because just as he finished saying those words, something knocked him down. He stared into a familiar face, his own. The eyes were different then his so it left only one person who it could be, but that person was supposed to be nothing but bloody chunks of flesh and meat.

"You have got to be the only pain in my ass to come back to life, Kuwabara," said Keiji.

"This time I have the ace up my sleeve," said Kuwabara. "That poison slows down your movements and prevents that other side from taking over."

Kuwabara raised his kunai to stab Keiji, but he was forced to dodge the barrage of shuriken that came from Anko. Forgot about her, thought Kuwabara. I guessI'll just have to kill her first. He drew his dao and ran straight at Anko, who drew her katana that she kept with her. The sound of metal rang out as katana and dao met, like a successor fighting its predecessor. Anko gracefully parried every stroke that Kuwabara made and then started to thrust wildly at him. This was a ruse to make Kuwabara move with his back towards Keiji. She waited for Keiji to recover so he could finish him off, but Kuwabara wouldn't give him that time. Instead he stepped up on his attack and started using shadow clones. Anko could handle the shadow clones since Kuwabara wasn't that good with a sword, but this only kept her mind off of the real Kuwabara who was moving closer to Keiji. Keiji was trying to regain his feet when the ground was swept from beneath his feet and a hand slammed him into the ground. Keiji gave a mental "fuck you" to the bastard who slammed him to the ground and to that bitch gravity.

"That bitch isn't here to save you now," said Kuwabara with a grin on his face.

"Don't you call her a bitch you fucking pussy," hissed Keiji still weakened from the poison.

Kuwabara punched him again and again and said, "What are you going to do about it?"

He continuously beat Keiji while laughing maniacally at his revenge. He was going to make KEiji hurt and then kill him with the knowledge that Anko would be following him. He leaned down to whisper in Keiji's ear.

"Any last words," said Kuwabara. He laughed as he put reached into his pouch to pull a kunai out, but felt metal rob him of his manhood.

"Yeah, fuck face, you never learned not to gloat over your enemy," said Keiji with a smile on his face. "Now it's going to cost you your dick. This is what happens when you call my wife a bitch."

Kuwabara rolled around on the floor clutching the spot where his cock had once been in indescribable pain. Anko had finished with the shadow clones and had walked over to see him and looked at Keiji who showed her the bloody kunai.

"Should we finish it," said Anko.

"Even though I'd like to let him live like this I won't be looking over my shoulder for the rest of my life," said Keiji. He finished the job with his kusanagi, not cutting his head all the way off.He made a PEZ dispenser out of him.

"Should we go help the others," asked Anko. It wasn't a real question, just a reminder that they weren't alone in this mission.

"Yeah," said Keiji. "Let's rock."

Zabuza cut through another boar demon and was soon beginning to tire of the whole thing. They weren't as strong as people had them cracked up to be. Hinata was dispatching them with great ease and Orochimaru just let his snakes do the work. They were like cockroaches that kept spawning every ten seconds. At the beginning Zabuza had decided to count the number of heads he'd take, but found that he was actually losing count of the number of heads that he separated from necks. Just then, a creature let out a beastly roar that sounded promising. Zabuza looked to see two lion demons carrying spears run towards him. He knew things were bad by how fast they were moving. If he didn't have back up he'd be in trouble. Another roar came from behind him and he saw two other lion demons with swords closing in on Hinata and Orochimaru. The three ninja moved towards each other and formed a back to back circle. The lions were about to attack when a kitsune tore through one. The others turned to attack it, but Zabuza attacked one. The other two wondered which represented a bigger threat until they saw the Kyuubi. It's pinkish fur turned red as it stomped towards them. The lions didn't know how to react as the Kyuubi fired two fireballs at the lion demons. They were incinerated immediately.

"About time you showed up," said Zabuza. "I needed someone to help us clean up the roach infestation."

"Does that mean that you couldn't do it all by yourself," said Naruto smirking. "And here I was thinking you were tough."

"Don't push it brat," said Zabuza. "You're still wet behind the ears unless you completed the mission that is."

Naruto took the former Mizukage's head from the kitsune and handed it to Zabuza. Zabuza took his time observing the exact angles of the eyebrows and his lips. He then handed it back to Naruto who wrapped it up into a white cloth.

"Where's Keiji," asked Naruto.

"I'm over here," said Keiji walking with the support of Anko.

"You okay," asked Naruto.

"He's been poisoned so he's far from okay," said Orochimaru. "We need to heal him fast or he might die, but unfortunately I don't know any medical jutsus."

"Neither do I," said Zabuza.

"I do," said Hinata. "I learned a few from Tsunade-sama. She said that as long as I'm with Naruto it wouldn't hurt to know a few medical jutsus. I can treat the poison, I'm sure, that was my specialty."

"Please save him," said Anko. She was afraid that her child might grow up without its father.

"Okay, I'll do what I can," said Hinata. She placed her hands over Keiji and used her chakra to draw the poison in his blood to one spot. When the poison was in one spot she used her chakra to remove the poison from his body. "There, I think that should do it."

"Thank you Hinata," said Anko hugging the young kunoichi with a snake like grip.

"Hate to kill the mood, but we're not alone," said Orochimaru.

"Yeah I know, two guys standing on the mountain top," said Naruto.

There were two men standing on the mountain behind them. One was dressed in a blue jumpsuit and the other wore yellow and black with a traditional ninja mask that didn't cover the area around the eyes.

"Well Hanshin it looks like we've found our next opponents," said the ninja in blue.

"It's about damn time," said the one in yellow, Hanshin. "I'll take the new Kyuubi and you can have the other. Don't die on me."

"Naruto-kun this doesn't seem like the kind of fight we want to get into," said Hinata.

"I know, but I don't think we have much of a choice," said Naruto. He ran up the mountain towards the one called Hanshin. "So let's get this started, shall we?"

He leapt into the air and tried to kick Hanshin, but his foot was caught and he was thrown behind the yellow and black ninja. Naruto landed on his feet and regained his footing just in time to defend himself against the barrage of kicks that were directed at him. He then moved past the kicks to deliver a punch right into Hanshin's side. The ninja was sent flying, but Naruto knew that Hanshin had jumped to lessen the damage of the blow.

"Your reaction time is superb and your punch is truly amazing," said Hanshin. He cracked every muscle in his body. "I'm going to enjoy this."

He quickly used a jutsu to shoot strands of black chakra in the shape of dragons at Naruto. Naruto was familiar with the technique and dodged each attack before performing a kage bushin no jutsu. The clones were cut down by the relentless use of the jutsu, but this only masked Naruto's true attack. Naruto charged at Hanshin with his special Shuriken Rasengan, but missed a direct hit. Instead, Hanshin received cuts all along his left arm and his side. He used his right arm to punch Naruto, using the dazed affects of his punch to string up a combo that delivered considerable amounts of damage to Naruto. Before Hanshin could finish the combo, Naruto formed a rasengan in his left hand and shot it out at Hanshin. Hanshin was surprised to see the little ball of spinning chakra push itself into his stomach. The force pushed Hanshin into the air where Naruto delivered a kick to his face. Hanshin used his chakra to stable himself as he pushed off a rock and was moving right for Naruto with kunai in hand.

"Now things are getting interesting," said Hanshin followed by maniacal laughter.

The kunai was wider than a normal kunai and it was designed primarily for hand to hand combat. Naruto took out his own kunai and parried the different attacks that were launched at him. Naruto then took out another kunai and used the one in his left hand for attack while his left hand parried any attacks. Hanshin found himself at a disadvantage, having only used one kunai in his whole life and now to find himself outclassed by something that he felt as some kid's idea. He always believed that using two weapons always made the technique awkward. His wrist was cramping from moving at top speed just to keep up with attack and defense. Thinking quickly he kicked Naruto, who vanished in a puff of smoke only to be replaced by a rock with a piece of paper on it. Hanshin recognized the paper and tried to avoid the explosive notes blast radius. Naruto used the distraction to move in and ram his head into Hanshin's stomach. The result left Hanshin coughing up his own blood as he regained his feet.

Naruto then appeared right in front of Hanshin and kicked him in the face. Hanshin was sent flying back and he felt someone grab the front of his clothes and he was thrown into the mountain side. He saw that Naruto had his shuriken rasengan ready and he knew that he had lost.

"You lose," said Naruto as he drove the jutsu into Hashin and tore him limb from limb. "Now to see how Keiji's doing."