Chapter 2 -

"Run to Me - Clay Aiken"

Needless to say, after breakfast today, the Marauders had skipped Charms class and frolicked in the snow. I must agree with you, when describing a quartet of guys and only one is gay, frolicking may be the wrong word. It's a very good thing I was the only 'guy' outside and we were way out on the grounds, down towards the lake. James, Sirius, and Peter had decided to take their animagus forms, doing the frolicking. Unfortunately I can't control my change as they could. James blended in with the scenery the most and I was grateful that we were not on a muggle hunting range because James made a very fine stag. His face was one you would mount on a wall (if you hunted at all, which I didn't, nor respected. But he was just a beautiful animal). That sounds weird, me calling an animal beautiful. But I'm not so macho that I can't appreciate beauty anywhere I see it. Including a stag with a fluffy little tail. I think I may have lost sight of Peter. I wasn't missing him too much. I was kind of worried that he would get himself eaten by an owl though. Especially Hercules, James' snowy white that liked to attack him on many occasions. I blinked the snow from my eyelashes and shook my head rather like Padfoot would do in his form as a tree branch of snow fell directly on my uncovered head. It was cold. Padfoot transformed back into his self and helped me brush off the snow with his ungloved hands. Now I knew why I wanted snow so damn much. It looked beautiful on his broad shoulders and in his long hair.

"Nice job, Moony." He muttered, taking earmuffs from his robe pocket and shoving them over my ears. "You're going to bloody freeze to death." He took my hand and rubbed it between his to keep it warm. "Didn't I tell you to wear gloves?"

"Did you honestly think I was going to listen?" I asked, giving him a small smile. He grinned widely back. Then without notice the mood changed as I was smacked in the face with a snowball. I looked over Sirius' shoulder to see James with his hands over his mouth. Apparently his target was Sirius. Sirius spun around quicker then you could ever imagine and wailed James on right in his chest. He doubled over momentarily and I knew the game was on. I backed off unnoticeably.

What I noticed however, was that Sirius Black wasn't wearing gloves either. And his hands kept mine warm for those brief moments they came in contact, and in those moments I could swear to Merlin, this is how you're supposed to feel.

I was wrong.

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I've noticed something, with the rise of the newest evil do-er in wizard land; how often ideas can really be repeated. Like, for example, many of the so called 'pureblood' wizards idolize Voldemort because his genocide-like ideas to kill off all muggleborns are seemingly original and revolutionary. What they don't realize is that less then a few decades ago, there was a man with the same train of mind; he thought his race and blood was better then them all and he is responsible for the deaths of 6 million Jews and another 6 million people who happened to be anything from disabled, brown haired, women, young children, and perhaps the one that hits closest to home for me- homosexuals.

As I said before, I felt so…right in that time just holding Sirius' hand…and now I realize just how corrupt and wrong that was. Because all I could think about after he let go was this: to continue holding his hand at that moment may have condemned him to death, years ago. And who's to say it wouldn't have condemned him to death now? People still weren't exactly accepting of being gay, as I pointed out before. I would be foolish to say I'm not scared of everyone in the school finding out about my sexuality. I'm almost more afraid of this as them finding out I'm a bloody werewolf.

This is my train of thought as I walked down the corridor alone, telling the rest of the guys that I was going to go back inside because I was cold. Sirius gave me a pointed look but soon became absorbed in his game when a snowball cracked him on the nose. Students were just now gathering to hit lunch before moving onto afternoon classes. I filed in after a small group of girls I knew from my classes. They giggled as the noticed my presence. Even though they claim to be more mature then us guys, at least we don't giggle when the opposite sex approaches. Stepping out of her group to walk with me was Lily Evans, the apple of James' eye, and one of my good friends from prefect duties. She grinned somewhat uncomfortably at me, and then even went as far as to grasp my hand and pull me aside from her bubbly group and down a separate corridor.

"Has James said anything about me lately?" Lily asked. I tried my best not to look troubled.

"Lately, Lily? You're all he ever talks about." I said, rather harsh. "You're never going to throw him off, Lily. You'll just have to adapt."

"Oh Remus…" She sighed. "I don't know if I want to throw him off anymore." I widened my eyes at her, shaking my head.

"I hope you have a merry Christmas, Lily. But playing these games with James is just going to make everyone point at you and go 'ho, ho, ho.'" She look absolutely affronted, and I felt bad, taking out all my frustrations of the day out on her, but what could I say? I was moody and prissy and gay and a bloody werewolf. Welcome to the life of Remus Lupin.

"Remus, how dare you? You have no idea. I'm starting to care for him, and I think…fuck, Remus. I think I love him." Her eyes, blazing, met mine and I stared as unwillingly back, both of us never giving. "I can't-I just can't-" and horribly angry, she tore away from me and from the corner we were talking in I saw her stride right outside of the school, and into the winter. Gathering my composure and trying not to look like the slinky asshole I was, I walked into lunch, sat down, and though not quite feeling like it, I ate.

After lunch, I went to classes, yet they seemed so empty without Sirius, James, Peter, and Lily. After classes, only Peter and James showed up for dinner. Padfoot went to the village to cool some steam- apparently he was raving about something. I wasn't stupid enough to even mention my fight with Lily, but James did notice her disappearance. So after dinner, I retired to bed and so did Wormtail and Prongs, exhausted from the escapades in the snow.

About 2AM, Sirius burst into the dormitory, freezing from head to toe but burning incandescently. He shouted out names which seemed so foreign- he rarely called us anything but "Moony, Wormtail, and Prongs"- and scrambled through the room to his bed with a beautiful but bruised girl. She was bleeding, awake but harmed, and Sirius felt a surge of worry. Even through this, she tried to smile, but her jaw was turning purple and was broken, and so he screamed our names again. James was first to realize something was sincerely wrong and sprang from the mattress in a frenzy, asking what was occurring, but this was before he spotted the girl in the bed of his best mate.

Oh, how the mighty fall. James dropped to his knee caps and took out his wand, choking back tears; he began to fix her wounds. He was the best at healing spells, but such passion for a young woman disrupted him and he faltered, so afraid of failure he was setting himself up for it.

"Malignis religna." I broke in, mending her jaw as well as I could. James nodded in thanks and gently moved her hair from her forehead and she raised an arm to him and parted her lovely, dry lips to speak.

"Death Eaters." She whispered. James turned to grasp Sirius' arm but he was already out the door to the common room. There was nothing left for me to do for Lily, and so I tore off after Padfoot, leaving James alone with his love. He kissed her hand and she let out a soft moan. "Not there, James. Give me a proper one."

"Lily, oh Lily, you're so hurt…I'm scared."

"Don't be." She said, pulling his face closer to her lips. She pecked him so soft it felt like air. "I'm not. I'm with you." With that, he looked her in the eyes, took up his wand, and started doing what he could for the girl who trusted him completely, loved him.

"Sirius!" I roared, despite the fact that half the castle was sleeping, and we tore through the entrance hall way and onto the grounds. Down the outside steps we flew and suddenly Sirius' feet couldn't find the floor, he slipped and cracked his ass on the stone. Normally, I would've laughed but he was so…incensed that there was nothing to find funny. He growled ferociously and I didn't step back, only came forward and placed a hand on his shoulder. Something finally connected in my mind. He was the one to find Lily, what if he glimpsed the Death Eaters at work? Was work even the word? To them, this was pleasure. Fun. Death Eaters at play.

"He attacked Lily because of me!" Sirius shouted. "Fucking ME!" He let out a sound between a sob and a scream and suddenly his face was buried in his hands and he was trembling in the cold and in his shame and fury. I didn't know what to do- I wanted to hug him. If I was a girl, that's what I would've done, let him know I was here for him, but I was just Remus Lupin, and I didn't know right and wrong. I knelt in front of him instead and kept my hands on his broad shoulders. He looked up desperately. "I was walking because I was infuriated that you left us outside. I was angry and I didn't know why. I smoked a lot, and then eventually I realized smoking didn't replace my hunger. I started walking back to go to the kitchens and then I passed Regulus and a few other pieces of shit picking on some girl. They looked like they were about to kill her and I came bursting over and they all scattered, save for my brother, if you could call him that. And he said- he said the best way to torture me was to torture my friends. He'd start by hitting James where it hurts, and then…they'd move on to you." He broke eye contact and glanced back at his feet. All I wanted to do was hug him, but I still refrained, but I placed a hand under his chin and raised it so he looked at me in the face.

"I was the reason Lily was out in the woods tonight. I really…oh shit, Sirius, I think I seriously hurt her today. And I felt like such an ass. This whole thing is no ones fault but Regulus and his cronies." He moved his hands from cradling his head to holding onto my shoulders as well and we met somewhere in between the crossfire- a hug and a hold. He leaned his forehead against mine and I closed my eyes, overwhelmed.

What the hell was he doing to me?

"She didn't want to go to the hospital wing. She wanted to see James. Remus…I think she thought she was going to die tonight."

"She won't. Not tonight, and definitely not without James around to try and stop it." He smiled at me and then started to use my body as leverage to stand, but soon after refused to move. "What's wrong?" I asked, thinking he had been hexed.

"My ass hasn't been so sore since the time my dear mother walloped me for eating muggle candy." I cracked a true grin at him and outstretched my hand to him, in a completely different meaning as before when we were in the snow and helped him up; I used a spell on his lovely arse so he could walk without pain. He placed an arm around my neck gingerly and glanced at his watch. "Let's go get some butterbeer and bring it back to the dorm, eh?" I nodded at him, smiling, and we entered the entrance hall only to delve down into the dungeons towards the kitchens.

We met no Slytherins, we met no eyes, and tonight we could be Sirius and Remus out on a night walk without whispered conversations the next morning about us.

If only I truly knew how the Death Eaters planned on hurting me to get on Sirius, I would've never risked what I did.