Disclaimer: All the characters that you recognize belong to J. K. Rowling.
Author's Note: Thanks to MissMrprk, Trocle, serindraxx, Bogloshi, JPx3LE, Heather gernenz, Miss Myrtle360, snazzysnez, Whitelight72, Casey Commings, zuska1985, siriusforeva, Willimillia, Jutey, x nimz x, Untamed Loner, sugur-huny-bun, NikkyB, and RubyBinds for reviewing! You are all incredible!
Lily gently rubbed her eyes and slowly opened them, being blinded by the bright light. Her hand immediately went to her head; she couldn't believe how much pain she was in. Ever her worst migraine didn't compare to this. In fact, her entire body ached, as if she had been run over by a car.
Groaning slightly, her eyes finally came into focus. She looked around for a moment before seeing that she was inside the Hospital Wing at Hogwarts. The sun was shining in brightly from the large windows that overlooked the castle grounds.
Across from Lily, she saw a human form shift from inside the white linen bed covers. She squinted her eyes and tried to make out who it was. She noticed black hair, but it wasn't messy like James's was. Instantly, she knew who occupied the bed. It was none other than Sirius Black. She felt relieved when she saw his chest heave up and down at a steady breathing pace; he was okay. His battle against Avery was okay in the end.
Lily groaned as she recalled the previous night's events. Until this moment, she hadn't thought about it at all. She remembered hearing two of the Unforgivable Curses coming from Avery and Mulciber's lips. One of them was shot at her, which accounted for her tremendous soreness.
She tightly blinked her eyes, wanting nothing more than to forget what occurred last night. She couldn't remember anything after the bright light that lit up the barn. Lily had no clue how she wound up in the Hospital Wing.
Suddenly, she felt someone touch her arm and her heart sped up. She slowly opened her eyes and turned to her right. She smiled once she saw who it was. "James," she whispered.
"How're you feeling?" he asked, grabbing her hand and softly rubbing it.
"I'm okay," she replied. "And you?"
"I've been better," he answered. "I'm just glad that you're okay."
She smiled up at him and shifted over in the bed so that he could sit next to her. Tears soon found their way into her eyes and she trembled as James took her into his arms and held her tightly to his chest. She hated herself for crying, especially since she knew how much he had gone through. He lost his parents, was involved in a Death Eater attack, and now had to deal with her crying. It shouldn't be her tears falling, it should be his. She should be consoling him, not the other way around. Yet, that wasn't how it was. James had his arms around her sobbing body and was gently rocking her in his arms.
Finally, Lily regained herself and brushed away her remaining tears. "I was so scared," she admitted.
"I know, so was I," he told her in a very somber voice.
"James, when you ran away, I felt my entire world stop. I've never been so scared in my entire life," she confided. "And then when we couldn't find you at first, I was miserable."
"Don't worry, Lils, I'm here now," James replied.
"And look at me now," she sobbed. "I'm a bloody mess and crying about every little thing…. It's not right. You should be the one upset and I should be trying to help you."
He smiled at her as he said, "Do you want me to cry? I will if you really want me to."
She laughed, grateful for his sense of humor. However, her laughter stopped quickly and she seriously asked, "Why'd you do it?"
James sighed and ran his hand through his messy hair. He dropped his head back and didn't answer for a moment. Finally, while looking away from Lily, he answered, "I needed to be alone… I obviously wasn't thinking very clearly, but I just knew I had to get out of here. I didn't want anyone looking at me again, pointing and saying 'oh look, it's James Potter, everyone pity him.' I just can't stand that." He paused for a moment and still looking away from her, he tightly blinked his eyes to wipe away his watery eyes. "I can't believe they're gone… I don't have anyone anymore."
Lily reached out and grasped his chin, forcing him to look at her. Even once his face was glancing at her, she kept a firm grasp on his chin, knowing that he would whip his head around the second she let go. "Look at me," she ordered, which he hesitantly did. "You are never going to be alone in this world and you do have someone, you'll always have someone."
James didn't say anything, but wrapped his arms around Lily once again and hugged her tightly to his chest. He let one single teardrop from his eye before taking a deep breath.
"James, I love you," Lily said. "And don't you ever forget that."
"I love you too," he murmured, before laying a kiss on the top of her head.
A moment passed between the young couple. They sat there in silence, engulfing the feeling of just being together. Lily rested her sore head against his chest and felt the gentle motion of every breath took. After the past few day's dangerous excitement, this was exactly what both she and James needed. Just to sit there with the one person that they loved amounted to a more relaxing time than either had experienced.
Finally, James broke the silence by saying, "Lils, I'm sorry."
"Don't be," she instantly replied.
"I am though, for last night… If I hadn't been so stupid with all the drinking, we all could have apparated into Hogsmeade instead of staying in that old barn. And if we weren't in the barn, you and Sirius would have never gotten hurt at all," he somberly stated.
"James, it's not your fault."
"Or I could have at least helped you guys out," he whispered.
"But you did," she softly said. "You saved me when I fell."
"I don't remember that," he replied.
"I'm surprised you remember anything at all," Lily told him.
"Honestly? I talked to Sirius early this morning," he confessed. "He told me everything."
"Is he going to be okay?" Lily questioned.
"Yeah, he had a cracked rib and a broken arm, but Madame Lingwood gave him some potion, so he'll be okay," James answered. He hesitated for a moment, and wondered whether or not he should say what was on his mind. In the end, he slowly stated, "I know you don't want me thinking this, but I still feel awful about what happened."
"James," she whispered.
"No, I do," he firmly said. "I know that it was my stupid idea to leave the castle and not tell anyone where I was, which led to all of this."
"James, we all understand," she softly replied.
"Why does this stuff always happen?" he asked.
"I don't know," she answered.
"Why me? Why did it have to be me that discovered Rander's secret? Why did it have to be my parents? Why did it have to be my fault that you and Sirius could have died?" he exclaimed in a very quiet voice. Once again, James ran his hand through his hair and sighed. "Why me?"
Lily leaned her head against James's chest and sighed. "I don't know why it has to be you, but believe me; I wish I could do something about it."
"Thanks," he whispered as he kissed the top of her head.
However, their moment was interrupted by Sirius stretching his arms above his head and sitting up. "Morning," he yawned.
"How're you feeling?" Lily asked.
"I'm a little sore, but all my bones are working again," he answered with a grin; he was always trying to make any situation better.
"And yourself?" he asked. "I see you've got a James attached to you."
"Very funny," James said as he stood and went to his own bed. He knew Sirius didn't really care if he and Lily were sitting together, but felt like he should move anyways. Besides, Madam Lingwood was bound to barge into the room soon anyways.
"I feel much better," Lily informed him, ignoring James's comment. It was true to, even from the time she woke up, she could feel her strength coming back to her. Additionally, her body didn't ache as much either.
Their conversation was cut short, however, as the double doors that led into the Hospital Wing were opened. Although, the person opening the doors wasn't who the three seventh years expected it to be. They expected Madam Lingwood to come in and tell them to shut up and go back to bed, which were her usual orders whenever she heard anyone talking in the sleeping area.
Instead, Professor Dumbledore appeared. His silver hair cascaded down to his waist and his moon-shaped spectacles glimmer from the sunlight. He had a faint smile on his face, the one he always seemed to wear whenever visiting his favorite students.
"I'm glad to see that all three of you are awake," he told them.
"Hello, Professor," Lily politely said, which was followed by two murmurs from the boys as well.
"Madame Lingwood has given me permission to visit with you three for a short period of time, and that was only after a severe persuasion on my part," Dumbledore informed his students. "I see that you three are all doing much better than the last I saw you, which means that we need to get down to business."
"Are we in trouble?" Lily blurted out, panic written across her face.
Dumbledore chuckled for a moment before answering, "No, Miss Evans, not at all. I'm just glad that you are all safe… I want to discuss what happened last night, down at that old barn."
"It was Avery and Mulciber," Sirius automatically said.
"As in Gregory Avery and Damon Mulciber?" Dumbledore questioned.
"Yes," Sirius answered. "They were both there; they're Death Eaters."
"I was afraid of that," Dumbledore solemnly said. "Now, please, I'd like a detailed account of what occurred."
As promised, Lily and Sirius both informed Dumbledore of exactly what happened. They told him that they snuck out of the castle, although they didn't mention how, and then went on their journey to find James. Lily went into detail about how they found James, but knew it wouldn't be safe to apparate back into Hogsmeade. From there, Sirius told of how he suggested staying in the old barn, despite the fact that Lily didn't have a good feeling about it. Sirius then told of how Mulciber and Avery jumped out at them and attacked, although not before informing them of the murder of the Potter's.
At the mention of his parents, James perked up and listened. His heart sank about ten notches and his blood began to boil. Avery and Mulciber killed his parents. They were responsible for their death. They were the reason that James was now considered an orphan.
"They used a polyjuice potion to pretend to be friends of Mrs. Potter's, and then once inside they used the killing curse to commit the crime," Sirius recalled. "And, well, sir, they said that they received the hairs to make the potion from an inside man at St. Mungo's."
"Lord Voldermort has an inside man there?" Dumbledore questioned.
"That's what Avery said," Sirius replied.
"Thank you, I'll alert the Ministry as soon as we're finished with this," the Headmaster said. "Now, please, continue on with your story."
"Sirius and Avery began yelling curses at each other, and they put up a pretty good fight," Lily recalled. "Then Mulciber came toward me and he used the disarming spell to take my wand away… And I didn't know what to do, but I felt inside my cloak and there was the parchment and quill you gave us the other day. James's owl was lingering nearby too, so I wrote you a letter, telling you where we were and that we needed help."
"Yes, Miss Evans, very smart thinking on your part," Dumbledore praised her. "That owl must be a very fast flyer, for I thought I may have been too late."
"Then it was you," Lily stated, her eyes brightening as she spoke. "That flash of light, that was you."
"Yes, Miss Evans," Dumbledore replied.
She smiled at him before continuing on with the story. Ashamed, Lily looked down at the ground while she retold the next part. Her cheeks were burning as she told of how she picked up the heavy shovel and knocked Avery to the ground before he could do any more damage to Sirius. Then she told of how Mulciber countered that attack by flying her high above the ground, only to have James save her from a dreadful fall.
Sirius then recounted how Avery was revived and the two dark wizards came at him, deciding it would be "fun" to place the Imperious Curse upon him. He said he tried to fight it, but it proved to be difficult, he couldn't remember anything that occurred while under it.
Lily took over the story telling and informed Dumbledore how under the curse, Sirius came toward her and bounded her with ropes. She recalled Avery and Mulciber arguing before Mulciber stated that Sirius was fighting against the curse. Then she felt a sudden pain as she retold the Cruciatus Curse. She recalled it stopping and then it hitting James before another round of pain came over her body.
"The next thing I knew, I looked out at Sirius and saw him drop his wand and take a swing at Avery, which broke his wand connection with me. I felt the excruciating pain die down a bit and tried to do some sort of magic, but I couldn't do anything… Avery hit Sirius with another curse, and the next thing I saw was him being thrown across the room," Lily said, blinking her eyes tightly as she spoke.
"And then a bright light came," Sirius added, "Which I presume was you."
"Yes, it was," Dumbledore responded, sighing before he spoke. "Although, by the time I noticed the three of you, Avery and Mulciber must have gotten away."
"What's going to happen now?" Sirius asked.
"Well, I believe you three should all get some rest," Dumbledore replied. "I will inform the Ministry of last night's events and a search warrant for Avery and Mulciber will be issued."
"You don't think that You-Know-Who will come after us, do you?" Lily carefully asked.
"No, Miss Evans, I don't believe he will," the Headmaster answered. "At least not while under my protection."
"Sir," Sirius began.
"Yes, Mister Black?"
"Do you remember what Professor McGonagall said to me the last time I was caught out of bed late at night?" Sirius asked.
"Yes, I do recall the conversation that you're speaking of."
"Am I?"
"No, Mister Black, not at all," Dumbledore replied, a smile forming beneath his half-moon glasses. "I would never dream of a Hogwarts without you here."
"Thank you, sir," Sirius said, grinning as well.
"Now, please get some rest," Dumbledore insisted. "Or else Madam Lingwood will never let me disturb another student again."
James felt a pang in his stomach as he watched Dumbledore walk away. Deciding to act on his urge, he leapt out of bed and followed the Headmaster. "Professor, wait. Can I talk to you for a moment?"
Dumbledore turned around and led James to a quiet area of the Hospital Wing, "Of course you may… I was actually expecting you to want to talk with me."
"I'm sorry," James said.
"Mister Potter, don't be," Dumbledore replied. "It's my fault for bringing such a harsh reality upon you so quickly. I shouldn't have allowed you to leave my office without the supervision of one of your peers. I should have known better, after all, you are a Potter."
"What do you mean?"
"Well, I taught your father Transfiguration before I was Headmaster, and let me tell you, he was exactly like you in that sense. He would have done the same as you did," Dumbledore answered.
"Still, I'm sorry for putting everyone through all this worrying."
"Don't ever feel that way, it was my mistake," the Headmaster honestly said. "Now, if there's not anything else, I need to inform the Ministry of the two latest Death Eaters."
"Well, sir, there is one more thing," James hesitantly said. "Do you think what happened between Rander and I was directly related to my parent's murder?"
Dumbledore sighed and replied, "I was hoping you wouldn't ask that question."
"So you think it was."
"I don't know if it was or not, nobody but Voldermort knows for sure," Dumbledore answered. "However, I feel you are grown enough to know my honest opinion… I do believe that it was related, Voldermort works in awful ways. Even as a student here, he always believed and adored revenge."
James looked down at his hands, feeling guiltier than ever before.
"James," Dumbledore began. "I don't want you to think this was your fault though, you mustn't blame yourself. Your parents were very powerful wizards who denied his request to join him multiple times. If I know anything about Voldermort, which I believe I do, it's that he views anyone who is powerful as a threat to himself. He has seen your parents as a threat for many years."
"It's not fair."
"I know it's not fair," Dumbledore replied. "Your parents were good, respectable wizards. They didn't deserve this, but I know that if they were alive today, seeing you like this would break their hearts. They loved you very much, James, and don't ever forget that."
"I know."
"It's a strange and dangerous world beyond the castle walls; one that you'll be entering in two months time," Dumbledore seriously told him. "Be careful, James… Remember what I said too, he views those with power as a threat to him… Be careful and be very aware."
"Thank you, sir," James said, although he was very confused by the Headmaster's words. Did Dumbledore know something that James didn't? Was he predicting that one day James would be powerful enough to be a threat to Lord Voldermort?
He felt his heart leap. He wasn't sure whether or not he approved of this thought. Sure, being a powerful wizard sounded great, and of course, James loved the glory of being thought that way. But still, he wasn't ready to face any more Death Eaters, let alone the most powerful Dark wizard of all time.
"James, you look a little uneasy," Dumbledore commented.
"Professor, with all due respect, why are you telling me this?" James asked, knitting his brow close together as he spoke.
Dumbledore smiled his odd smile again and with twinkling eyes he replied, "I know that a few months ago you heard Professor McGonagall and me speaking."
"You do?" James asked, worry written across his face. How could he know that? James had been so sneaky, and he had even worn the cloak! How could Dumbledore know?
"Yes, you see, if you're going to wear that old cloak of yours, you might want to be a little quieter on your toes," Dumbledore said, and amused look shining in his eyes.
"You know about the cloak?"
"Of course I do," Dumbledore chuckled. "That thing has been in your family for hundreds of years. Even when I was a young boy here, your grandfather, who was a year behind me, had the cloak. I know it gets passed down from generation to generation."
"You've known all these years, and you haven't said anything?" James asked.
"What fun would that be if I told you I knew about it earlier?" Dumbledore countered, his amused look stretching down to his lips.
"I didn't know that," James commented, slightly shaking his head as he spoke.
"However, that it besides the point," the Headmaster stated. "I know you heard about the Order, and I trust you not to let anyone else discover it, besides your best friends, whom I'm sure you've already spoken to."
"I won't say a word."
"The Order of the Phoenix is the official name of the group," Dumbledore began. "Myself, along with many other respectable witches and wizards are the members of the organization. It is our mission to fight back against Lord Voldermort and his followers."
"Were my parents in it?' James suddenly questioned.
"Yes, they were," Dumbledore answered.
James sucked his lower lip over his teeth and softly bit at it. He looked up at the wise professor and said, "I want to be in it."
"I knew you would say that," the Headmaster replied. "That is the main reason I told you about it… You are a very capable young wizard; one of the best students Hogwarts has ever seen."
"Thank you, sir."
"My only condition is that you are not allowed to be in it right away," Dumbledore strictly informed his student. "Wait until the school year finishes and the summer passes, then I will be in contact with you again about it."
"But sir," James protested. "I want to be in it now… I want to do something, anything at all to catch those damned Death Eaters."
"I know you do, but you're not ready yet," Dumbledore replied. "It's a very dangerous job, James. Innocent people are murdered while trying to do their tasks."
"I know."
"Just wait," Dumbledore instructed. "When the time is right, I promise you will be given the chance to fight against the Dark Arts."
"Thank you, Professor," James said.
"Now, James, go get some rest… I need to speak with the Minister of Magic and inform him of the information that Miss Evans and Mister Black supplied me with," Dumbledore said, the twinkling light reappearing in his eyes.
James sighed and slowly walked back to where his friends were laying in their respected beds. Dumbledore had certainly given him a lot to think about. Yet, James knew from the moment he spoke that he wanted to be a member of the Order of the Phoenix. He would be willing to risk his life in order to save others; he would do anything to ensure that another Hogwarts student wouldn't have to go through what he had to.
"You okay?" Lily asked, watching him as he sat down in his bed.
He stared at her for a moment, her emerald eyes piercing into his. She was another reason to join the Order. If anything were to ever happen to her, just because she was muggleborn, James wasn't sure he would ever recover. He loved Lily Evans and was going to do anything he possibly could to ensure her safety.
"James? Are you okay?" Lily repeated, worry written across her gentle face.
He smiled at her and replied, "I will be."
---
Three days later, the Marauders and Lily, along with most of the Hogwarts faculty, all found themselves at Gerald and Linda Potter's funeral. Witches and wizards from all across Britain arrived for the ceremony, which was held at an outdoor function about five miles away from the former Potter mansion. The types of people varied greatly from distant relatives to former Hogwarts friends, and even the Minister of Magic himself.
James, Lily, Sirius, Remus, and Peter were all seated in the front row and could practically see the minister's sweat as he read several different passages to the crowd. Lily looked over at James and saw that he had a blank expression across his face, as if he were trying his hardest to conceal his true feelings. She gently laid her hand across his black trousers and gave his leg a reassuring squeeze, as if to let him know she would always be there for him.
The ceremony carried on peacefully; sobs could be heard from every angle of the seated guests. It was amazing how two people could be so loved to bring forth numerous amounts of people, all gathered to mourn for their beloved friends.
At the end of the funeral, two white doves were released into the sky. They flew high above everyone heads until they disappeared together into the distance, symbolizing the peacefulness and innocence of Gerald and Linda Potter.
When the caskets were magically flown down the aisle, James turned his head away. He couldn't bear to see his parents leave for good, only to be buried beneath the ground. Lily grabbed onto his hand and held it tightly, forcing him to know she wouldn't ever leave his side. He felt a small tear appear in the corner of his eye, which he quickly blinked away.
Once the two mahogany caskets left the sight and were deep beneath the ground, a few select people who were close with the Potters were permitted to visit the burial site. James bit his lip, not sure whether he actually wanted to see it. In the end, he took a deep breath and with his four closest friends, made the journey to the gravesite.
Gerald and Linda Potter were buried next to each other, without any other bodies near them. Two gravestones poked out of the ground, surrounded by a circle of white flowers. It was a peaceful location; one that would ensure the modesty and respect the Potter's had before their deaths.
Gerald H. Potter
Liberty, Equality, Justice
1931 –1976
Directly to the right of Gerald Potter's grave stood Linda Potter's, which read-
Linda A. Potter
Loving Mother, Daughter, Wife
1932 – 1976
As the five friends gathered around the area, James grabbed onto Lily's soft hand. He needed to feel her there with him. He needed to know he wasn't alone in the world, despite the fact that he was staring at his parent's gravestones.
Sirius walked closer to the tombstones and bent down before them, gently stroking his hand across each engraved letter. His other hand went to his eyes, where he wiped away one small tear. Linda and Gerald Potter were more like his family that his birth family. They taught him life lessons, provided him with a home, and cared for him as if he were their own son. Sirius knew that he would never meet two greater parents in his entire life.
Standing up, he sighed and backed away from the graves. He felt his heart sink and silently thanked them for everything they had ever given to him. He shut his eyes for a moment before looking up at the sky, knowing they would always be looking down on the world below. Knowing there was nothing else for him to do, Sirius turned and walked away from the site without muttering a single word.
Peter walked forward next and bowed his head in respect. Linda and Gerald Potter didn't deserve to live such short lives. They were good, honest wizards. Peter couldn't ask to meet a better pair. He recalled visiting the Potter mansion on numerous accounts. His favorite memory consisted of a time when Linda Potter, sensing he was feeling left out from the group, made him a special lunch, one that even James didn't get. It brought a smile to his face, the simple gesture that showed she cared.
He then looked up again at the two stones staring back at him. He backed away from them slowly and followed Sirius's motions of walking away.
Remus was next in line to pay his respect to Gerald and Linda Potter. He stared down at the writing on the gravestones and knew they couldn't be more accurate. Gerald Potter stood for everything his grave said; nothing was more important to him than protecting the liberty, equality, and justice of his family and fellow people, no matter their heritage. Linda Potter was one of the sweetest women he had ever had the pleasure of knowing; she couldn't have been a more loving woman.
Backing away from the graves, Remus turned to face Lily and James. He patted James on the shoulder and said, "They were incredible."
"I know," James whispered before watching Remus disappear out of sight.
He continued to grasp onto Lily's hand, leaving her as a barrier between himself and his parent's graves. He didn't want to face them quite yet. By not seeing them, it was as if they weren't completely dead yet. He could still have hope they would be just around the corner, smiling at him.
"James," Lily softly said.
Hearing his name, James intently stared at her. She released her hand from his grip and hugged him tightly to her chest, nurturing him like a small child. They remained that way for a considerable amount of time, until Lily broke away.
She looked out toward the graves and wiped her eyes, making them red and blotchy. Her black mascara ran slightly, causing her eyes to look darker than they really were. She refocused her attention on James and lovingly ran her hand up and down his arm before walking away from the grave sight, leaving James alone with his parents.
Not knowing what else to do, James shoved his hands deep inside his pockets and focused his attention down on the ground. He stubbed his toe into the grassy surface below him and shrugged his shoulders. He loved his parents, but didn't know what he was supposed to say to them.
Eventually, he slowly walked over to the actually tombstones and sat down before them, crisscrossing his legs and allowing his body to relax. His hands went to the ground and lightly grazed the blades of grass.
"I wish you were here," he slowly said, blinking his eyes as he spoke.
He moved his right hand away from the grass and rested his elbow on his legs, his head resting in his hand. He sighed and asked, "Why did you have to go? Why did you have to leave me alone in the world?"
He felt stupid asking these questions, it wasn't as if his parents could ever respond to him. He sighed again, yet continued talking, "I miss you both so much… I don't know how I'm going to manage without you… I know I have Lily, Sirius, Remus, Peter, but it's not the same as having you around. I love you both so much… I, I need you both. I know I've told you numerous times that I didn't and that I wanted to be treated like and adult, but not now. I want you both here, I need you both here."
As he spoke, he felt tears swelling up inside his eyes. Knowing there was no one there to see him cry, he allowed the tears to run down his cheeks. He sat that, sobbing for nearly an hour. He couldn't control the flood emerging from his eyes; it was an unstoppable force just waiting to come out.
James lied down in front of the graves, still slightly sobbing. He confessed everything to his parents, all the emotions he had ever felt. He told them that he didn't want to be an auror like every other male in the Potter family. He told them how he wanted to marry Lily someday, and he hoped that although they couldn't make it to the wedding in person, that they would still be with him from above. James found himself telling them all about his encounter with Rander, being alone in the park for days at a time, and the events that occurred in the old barn.
He confessed everything to them and knew that they were listening to his every word. Although they weren't with him physically, he could feel their presence. He knew that their souls were with him and always would be. Wherever he went, no matter what he did in life, they would always be with him, in his heart, to guide him through life's mysteries.
Author's Note 2: Hi all! I hope you enjoyed chapter 48! Okay, so first of all, if you really want to recall Dumbledore and McGonagall's conversation, it was back in chapter 30. Secondly, before anyone asks why I even had Peter attend the funeral, remember, he was their friend at the time and not an evil person (yet.) Lastly, please, please, please review! I'm literally begging you to hit the little button and write down any comment you may have. I live on your constructive criticism and praise!