Black and White
Longing Pain
Disclaimer: I own nothing
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The following month was simple. Everything went normal, or as normal as possible. Nothing interesting happened in my classes, except of course music class. Sasuke still hit on me everyday but I got used to it and ignored it. I asked Gaara millions of questions, none of which he answered, while he read his books. It was a routine by the end of the first week.
In my spare time I worked on my guitar. I often played several songs and studied music all day. I had that same dream over and over again each night. I still wasn't able to save him. I didn't know how. Gaara and I would go to that same little clearing on Saturdays and we would go into town on Sundays. I was happy. I finally had a friend.
But there was this awful pain in my chest when I looked at Gaara. It made me want to gasp as though I couldn't breathe. It was a longing pain. I was falling in love with him more and more each day.
But I knew he didn't love me. He probably didn't even like me. I knew this fact so surely that I pushed my feelings aside and ignored them. I was in denial and I knew it. And yet I kept it all locked up. I feared losing what little I had of him by ruining it. I knew if the truth was out in the open it would all be ruined. So I endured the pain and pretended.
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One Thursday afternoon I was laying on my bed and listening to some music when Gaara walked in. He went and sat down like always, but something was different. He seemed happy. Perplexed, I turned down my music so I could ask him what he was so happy about. Before I could say anythnig ahe ran out of the room again and slammed the door behind him.
I sat up and got my guitar. I strummed out meaningless notes as I waited for Gaara to return. I waited for three hours untill it was nine. I got up and went to take a shower. When I finished and dressed I returned to the room. It was still empty.
I brushed my hair and got into bed. I layed there untill ten. Still Gaara had not returned. I felt so hurt. I felt my heart being ripped apart. I gasped and turned on my side. Silent tears fell.
How pathetic I was, crying over something so stupid. But still I cried even as these thoughts reached my mind. Finally the tears stopped and I layed there, glassy eyed, untill I heard the door open. I could hear the soft footsteps to the bed. I pretended to sleep. Gaara said not one word as he went to lay down. I closed my eyes to try and block out all the thoughts and accuztions that ran through my head. I screamed at myself in my mind to stop being so weak. I barely even knew him! How could I love him? I asked myself this question repeatedly. But the most prominent question I had was, where had Gaara been? These thoughts plaiged me as I fell asleep.
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That night I had the dream again. But this time as we fell through the air while he slept, I didn't call out to him. I didn't want to save him.
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So, what did you think? I was trying to add a little conflict. This chapter was MEGA short but I think this storry is going to be long. I don't know yet. Well, anyways r&r for me please. Thanks.