AN: sorry for the delay.

I know I said I'd write for SEED Mwu and Murrue here only, but this idea's been sticking in my head, because I really do wish Neo would talk to Murrue about Stellar (among other things). and this doesn't seem like enough to stand by itself, so I'm putting it in here. so spoiler alert for anyone who haven't seen Destiny...

Title/theme: ADVICE
Genre: general
Approx time line: After Phase 43 of GSD
Summary: He turned to her with startling blue eyes full of…anxiety and guilt. "Do you think, she'd ever forgive me?"

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"Mind if I sit here?"

Neo looked up from his food at the voice, and found the captain of the Archangel standing beside him, holding her own tray. He shrugged, and without hesitation, she lowered her tray onto the table and sat down beside him.

He didn't talk to her, or look at her. Truth was, he still felt unsure around her. He sort of wanted to spend time with her, but was either too shy, or too afraid. He felt that he had made the right decision to stay, but there was still that feeling of uneasiness that he was missing something.

"You look troubled," her soft voice gentle intruded his thoughts. "Do you want to tell me about it?"

"What, so you can save me?" he retorted, perhaps sharper than he intended. She looked surprised at his reply, but the moment passed, and she smiled gently and shook her head.

"No, I can't do that. I just think it'd be better for you to let it out. And I'm here to listen."

He looked at her suspiciously, before staring back down at his food. "I don't think you'd understand."

She looked thoughtful. "Hmm, maybe not. But how would we know that until you let me know what's on your mind?"

He sighed. She was so…innocent, so naïve and pure, sitting there wanting to know what ailed him. How could she possibly understand the turmoil he was feeling within?

"What do you want me to talk about? My deepest, darkest secrets so that you can tell me everything's okay?" he asked dryly.

He heard her sigh. "No. You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to. I just want to talk, that's all."

He stole a glance at her, and found her studying him. Her eyes had that look in them again that made him feel like she wasn't looking at him. Suddenly, overcome by curiosity, a question came into mind, and before he knew it, he blurted it out.

"This Mwu la Flaga, what happened to him?"

She dropped her fork in shock at the sudden question. Her eyes widened as she stifled a gasp, and Neo noted that her hands shook slightly. She looked away, hands folded in her lap, her hair hiding her eyes.

"I…I'm sorry, I didn't mean to…" he stuttered, feeling awkward again.

"He…died…protecting this ship at Jakin Due." Her voice was such a low whisper that he could hardly make out the words.

"Oh." Neo looked down at his food again. "I'm sorry…"

Silence came between them as Neo considered this information. He faintly remembered the news about Jakin Due, though his memory was fuzzy as to where he was at the time, or whether he even fought at that battle at all. But, if this Mwu was dead, then why did everyone think that he was Mwu? Especially this captain. Sometimes she'd look at him in horror as if he were a ghost, other times she'd look at him with such tenderness that he was starting to believe that he really was who she thought he was.

"You were, close?"

Her shoulders twitched at his question. She nodded faintly.

So that explained her sadness when she saw him, looking so much like her Mwu.

"He said, he said that he'd come back," her soft, trembling voice broke the silence, "But he didn't."

"I see." Neo closed his eyes and tilted his head back. He paused a bit before asking his next question: "Are you, mad at him for it?"

She turned to him in surprise, or amazement, he wasn't sure which. She smiled, not the soft gentle smile he'd gotten used to, but a cold and distant smile, nostalgic and painful.

"I guess at first, I was. For not keeping his promise and leaving me behind." She stared off into the distance. "But I realized there was no point in staying angry at someone who could not feel it. Besides, I've learned that nothing comes out of holding a grudge."

He considered her answer. "Is it that easy to forgive someone?" he asked softly.

She looked at him in surprise. "I, don't know. Depends on the person and situation I guess."

"You know, I was fond of someone once," he spoke up after a moment's silence. "She trusted me wholeheartedly. And I betrayed her. I lied to her, telling her that she wouldn't die. I promised someone that she wouldn't have to fight anymore, but because of my own incompetence, she paid the price. And in the end, I, I couldn't even protect her."

He turned to her with startling blue eyes full of…anxiety and guilt. "Do you think, she'd ever forgive me for that?"

Murrue regarded him softly. He could tell she was somewhat curious as to who he was talking about, but she didn't ask. She turned away and shook her head. "The dead don't forgive nor do they blame. It is the living who carry the guilt and want to repent their sins. You needn't worry about asking forgiveness from someone who isn't here anymore. They can't hear you, no matter how much you scream, cry, or beg."

Neo was taken aback by her answer. He stared at her for a few moments, wondering if she was speaking from experience. She didn't look at him, staring down at the table instead.

Something in her eyes made him think that he underestimated her, that maybe, she did understand him. Perhaps, she even understood his feelings more than he did.

"Who are you, really?" he looked at her in amazement.

She smiled, somewhat sadly. "Just someone who wants to live peacefully."

"I see," he murmured. "Is that why you're fighting?"

"I'd like to think so," she nodded. Then sighed. "But we're hypocrites too, for we're trying to bring peace with weapons in our hands." She looked down. "Just like before."

"Oh?"

Instead of explaining, she starting talking softly, almost to herself, "It may sound conceited, but I feel obligated to protect the peace that he gave his life to bring. I mustn't let his sacrifice be in vain."

She then faced him and explained, "We, that is, the people on this ship, cannot agree with what either the ZAFT or the EA are doing. But we don't want anyone to die either. Because the dead can never have a chance at peace again."

"Is that why you interfered when we were fighting the Minerva?"

"Eh? Oh, yes. All we want is for the battles to stop."

"Heh, I wonder what Jibril would say to that."

Murrue's eyes widened slightly at the mention of Jibril's name. She turned to him, "You worked for the leader of Blue Cosmos?"

He looked surprised at her incredulity. "Yes, I lead a special team directly under his command." Then he remembered, he never did tell her, or anyone here, what role he played in the EA.

He choked out a bitter laugh. "Yes, a special team consisting of children being used as weapons and nothing more. They're physically teenagers, but they have the mental capacity of young children, so innocent, yet they've seen things that even make adults hurl. All they know is how to kill, in order to survive, or so I tell them." Then he gave another strangled laugh, "And if they had a pleasant experience that would interfere with their purpose, I'd erase them. Because who needs pleasant memories when all you live for is the next battle." He paused and chuckled hysterically. "Soldiers, they're my toy soldiers! And when they're broken, I'm not supposed to care. Because soldiers, like weapons, are expendable. I should know, because I'm a toy soldier myself!"

He laughed again before looking to her to get her reaction. He expected disgust, horror, or pity. After all, he doubted that she'd ever seen or heard of something so cold, so…inhuman. But instead, there was concern and overwhelming sadness in her soft eyes.

"Oh Mwu…what did they do to you…"

He flinched slightly as she called him by that name again. She never called him "Neo", not even once. He supposed he should be used to being called by "Mwu" now, but the thought of being referred to by a dead man's name made him feel uncomfortable.

He studied her carefully. He thought he understood her, but she continued to confuse him. If she had accepted that her Mwu was dead, then…

"Why?" he asked, "Why do you always call me by that name?" He blurted out the question that had been on his mind for a long time. He had been hesitant to ask before, but now since they were both being frank, he might as well find an answer.

"Oh," she was startled by his question and the blunt way that he put it. She turned away, slightly embarrassed. "I'm sorry. I…it's just that you look so much like him, I…just…"

Neo knitted his brows in annoyance. "I'm sorry about what happened to him. I don't know why I look like him, but please get it through your head, I'm not your Mwu!" he muttered, his tone coming out slightly angry. Then he immediately regretted it. He opened his mouth to apologize, but she spoke first.

"I know," she replied softly, seemingly not offended at all. "I know I ought to. I can get my mind to accept it, but I can't force my heart to believe it." She chuckled softly, mirthlessly. "Maybe I'm still in denial, even after two years." She looked up at him, eyes full of helplessness and apology. "I'm sorry, but I can't help it. When I see you, I'm reminded of him."

Then it struck him. That gentle look of in her eyes, the concern and kindness she was showing him, the fact that she let him stay. It wasn't because she cared about him, it was because she thought he was someone who didn't exist anymore.

He suddenly felt bitter at that realization. Perhaps jealous as well. Bitter about the fact that she couldn't see him, that she didn't really care about him.

Because like it or not, he had fallen in love with her.

Was it possible? Was it even allowed? She was an angel, and he, he was tainted, a corrupted soul who would likely be punished for his sins.

"Is that why you let me stay then?" he mumbled, more to himself than to her. He wasn't expecting her to hear him, so he was a bit surprised when she shook her head in answer.

"Then why?" he wanted to know.

She smiled. "Because you asked me to."

Neo looked away. Still thinking that he was only a substitute for the man in her heart. As if reading his mind, she whispered softly, that he barely heard her, "You're not here to replace anyone. I'm sorry if it seems that way, but like I told you before, Mwu…is someone irreplaceable."

Before he could digest her answer though, she looked at her watch and gasped. Then she smiled at him apologetically, "Please excuse me, I have to go now."

As she stood up to leave, he caught her wrist. She turned her soft caramel gaze to him, surprised but expectant.

"Could we," he broke away from her gaze, almost embarrassed to ask, "Could we talk like this again some time?" And he meant it, because talking to her did make him feel better. She was right, talking about it made him feel lighter, more relieved. And he felt that he understood her, and maybe himself, more. Maybe she wasn't as innocent or naïve as he first thought, but there was something about her that was so comforting. Perhaps it was what he needed the most right now.

She smiled, genuinely this time.

"Any time Mwu."

He flinched again, but returned her smile as he realised she was calling him that probably more out of habit than anything else.

"Thank you."