July 20, 2005
Dear Diary,
Good news: I found him. Bad news: he was beyond hurt.
I know I said I liked how the bistro was, then I said I hated it, and now I'm pretty neutral. It's a good thing because as I was sprinting out of my building, I saw Tommy through all those freakin' windows. The bad is that I think that's why Tommy decided to go inside in the first place… Because he saw someone through those same windows. He had Lucas pinned up against the counter and I'm pretty sure he was cutting off his air supply. Yeah, because Lucas wheezed a lot and gasped for air with a purple face once I got Tommy off of him.
And how could little Sadie Harrison get a raging Tom Quincy off of the guy? Me trying to pull him off was hopeless (even though I did try). Screaming and pleading wasn't getting me anywhere either. So, like an idiot with a diary in hand, I decided to make myself as completely vulnerable as possible. I read some of my Tommy-centric entries out loud…
I'm pretty sure that scared him a little… I don't think he knew how much I love him, but now it's all out in the open.
I don't know. We talked tons about it at dinner last night. Well, half of dinner since the fist half was silent. He said he's not ready to get back to where we were. I think it's because he doesn't trust me. Honestly, I don't blame him… He said he wants us to stay together, but the distance might be good when he goes back home. I don't think the distance sounds good at all, but I'll do what he wants.
And last night, he also slept on my floor in the living room. So it's kinda like he did leave… But he's still around..? I don't know. I love how I can manage to screw everything up. We'll see what today has in store for us.
Sadie.