3 weeks later found Harry again sitting by the lake. It had been another unbearable day of classes, vindictive whispers and suspicious glares. His nights had been tormented by the faces of the dead.

Hermione totally ignored him. Her dorm mates seemed to make a wall around her, perhaps to protect her, in case he would try to approach. They need not have worried, there was no way he was going to go near her. She had made her choice. His dorm mates had ignored him, even Neville shied away now. It suited Harry just fine. He didn't want to curse anyone with his presence.

As he watched the squid make lazy circles around the lake, Harry cried. As much as he hated himself for it, it was as if he couldn't stop, the salty tears fell anyway. Blurring his shaky vision, creating tracks down his cheeks. His mind was clear, empty, but far too full.

As a cold breeze wrapped around his shoulders, he shivered. It had been a warm day so he hadn't worn a jumper under his robes, and now with it lying underneath him, his t-shirt did little to block out the cold. Taking a shuddering breath and wrapping his arms around himself, he managed to get a control on his tears. He could see Malfoy walking towards him this time. He didn't really know what to make of the Slytherin, or what he had said, but he respected him for it none the less.

As Draco came to a stop beside Potter, he felt his heart clench. The boy really did look pathetic. He was way too pale, tear marks littered his face, and he was painfully thin. Draco had noticed he had not attended dinner yet again, and had bought a few pieces of bread and some sausages with him, wrapped in a napkin. It wasn't much, he knew, but it was better than nothing. As he set down his own robe to sit on, he passed Potter the small bundle of food.

"Here"

"T-thanks"

They sat staring out into the lake silently, Harry occasionally nibbling on the bread. It wasn't an uncomfortable silence, but not exactly calming either.

"What you told me, you were serious weren't you"

Malfoy didn't answer, he didn't need to.

"My family, the Dursleys, they hate me. Year after year I go back there. For my safety apparently, but I don't see how I am safe there. I am beaten for my freakishness, forced to do endless chores until I pass out from exhaustion, I'm fed once every two days, and sleep in the cupboard under the stairs. Its always been the same. I've grown up knowing I'm different, wrong. Forced to watch my cousin get everything he ever wanted, whilst getting and deserving nothing myself. When Hagrid came and told me of the wizarding world, I though I had come home"

He took a gulp of air and forced himself to meet Malfoys eyes.

"My life, its one big cosmic joke. Thousands of people look to me to save them, and yet, I cant even save m-my friends"

The tears fell again. Sobs shuddering through him.

"I-I I cant even s-save myself"

Malfoy didn't move to comfort the boy physically. He didn't know how. He did stay though, as Harry sobbed, and that meant so much more.

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Months passed and Harry slipped into a routine of sleepless nights and empty days. Christmas approached slowly and tension could be felt throughout the wizarding community. It had been a week since the Death Eaters had staged their last attack, and their inactivity never meant anything good. The Halloween feast had been a great deal more subdued than normal, even without the ever unwanted presence of the not so golden boy.

Harry Potter now spent his nights in the room of requirement. He had stopped sleeping, or rather being in the dorm after a more than slightly upset and angry Dean had thrown him out.

Harry was just entering his dorm when suddenly a well aimed punch in the mouth sent him painfully to the floor.

"How fucking dare you Potter! I've had enough of you, strutting around! How can you even sleep in this room knowing Ron's bed is empty because you got him bloody well killed! Lapping it up are you? Loving the way the dorm is so quiet now eh? Yeh I'll bet!"

A kick in the ribs had Harry coughing up blood as his dorm mate ranted and raved. He could vaguely see Neville behind him but the boy looked terrified. No help from there then.

"And don't think we haven't seen you with that fucking Death Eater either! Sitting outside like pals! Hermione can barely get through a day without bursting into tears! And there's you! The one fucking responsible, fucking well hanging out with Malfoy who probably helped kill Ron!"

By now Harry had simply curled up in a ball and stopped struggling. What was the use? When Dean finally stopped screaming, he threw Harry's trunk at him and declared, rather loudly, that he could "fuck off to his murdering friends and never come back".

Ignoring his almost untouched meal, Harry downed his water. He suspected it contained potions or vitamins as he had stopped eating properly months ago and yet could still function, al bet shakily. He didn't attend meals anymore, and somehow Harry suspected a certain overenthusiastic house elf had taken it upon himself to send Harry food and drink as much as possible, ensuring he didn't die from malnutrition. Well, not just yet anyway.

The months of starvation had literally eaten away ay Harrys body. His muscles had wasted away to nothing and his skin had an unhealthy yellow pallor to it. Bone stuck out painfully and Harry suspected he could even give Voldemort a run for his money in a freak show.

Students would be returning to their homes in the morning, all ready to spend Christmas with their families. Harry was however, once again left alone at Hogwarts, this time though, without his friends. He has stumbled upon one of the times Hermione would speak freely in the common room and had discovered that she was going home for Christmas. Harry was happy for her, in a way, but jealousy gnawed at him anyway. She was so very lucky to have family who loved her. He would give anything for what she had.

Pulling out his charms essay he pushed the thoughts away. Although he still wasn't eating much and sleep escaped him but for a couple of hours here and there, Harry was putting a lot more effort into getting himself back on his feet. He had begun to train physically again, and concentrated a lot more on his studies. Reading helped him expand his knowledge and already he could feel the advantage it gave him, with much more at his finger tips.

He finished his charms essay and turned to potions. It seemed as much as Harry learned on the subject, something always confused him, making it difficult for him to fully grasp the subject. Refilling his quill and pulling out yet another text book, he prepared himself for a busy night.

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