Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, it belongs to Masashi Kishimoto. I only own the plot.
I felt like being poetic today, hence the poetry…ignore it if you hate poetry. If it doesn't make sense, it's suppose to I guess…hell I don't even know what I'm trying to write lol
I am sorry for leaving this story for so long…I just have a lot of stuff to do and I can't seem to find the time to write…
But if I don't update any time soon…I suppose you all would want to kill me? ;D
Warning: spoilers of Episode 153.
Just A Mission-ch6c
A girl was walking on thin ice--
Behind her was a boy
Hand-in-hand,
Letting her drag him along…
Never questioning,
Always waiting patiently,
For he believe that one day,
The girl will to turn around
And look at him.
But the girl never did.
A boy was walking on thin ice—
Before him was a girl
Day-by-day,
Closing her eyes as she walked…
Always pretending,
Never admitting,
For she believe things will never change,
The boy will always be behind her
And remain there.
It was her who couldn't let go of his hand.
They were walking on thin ice--
Before them there was nothing left
Cracks-after-cracks
Breaking of the ice as they walked…
Maybe it is now…
Maybe some time in the future,
They will have to stop
Because both of them knew
They can no longer go on like this.
It was too late for both of them to turn back
Tenten thought she was dead.
She woke up being surrounded by complete darkness, after all.
Not to mention that she could recall the battle between Isamu and her clearly.
She lost.
That was what happens to you…when one loses a battle. In her case, Isamu killed her…with that pill which he'd forced her to swallow. Seeing where she was, which was in the middle of nowhere, her explanation was confirmed.
She died.
It was a topic Tenten genuinely would like avoid. She didn't like to think about death, even though it was part of her job description. As a shinobi, there were times when she had to take away life; there was no other way to say it. It was simple a part of a mission sometimes—the need to assassinate a target or to remove any threat in order to protect a client.
Killing wasn't right; however, it was one of the solutions to a problem, like the time when her team helped the people of a village to overthrow a tyrant…
There was no such thing as being right absolutely. As a saying that she'd once heard, 'there's no such thing as right and wrong, only diverging opinions'. For her, what seemed to be correct might be totally condemned by other people…
She didn't go to the small river village, Katabame Kinzan, to become a saviour. Unlike Naruto, she didn't have a strong sense of justice that just had to be carried out. She was only at the village because, by chance, she was ordered to be there. Same thing for the overthrowing of the tyrant…
To put it bluntly, she did what she had to do to complete her mission and…to stay alive.
And getting rid of her enemy was the simplest way to exterminate a threat forever. One of a major problem for shinobis was the fear of other people trying to get back at them. There were just numerous chances of shinobis making enemies, it was easy. After all, for most parts, people simply have conflicting objectives than you. Competing, injuring, and killing one another was a commonplace to complete an assignment that was given to them.
Kill…
She'd wished she'd killed Isamu on the way back to Konoha…when he was vulnerable.
Her friends
She worried that Isamu would go after them one by one now that he'd taken care of her.
They were all she'd left.
Her friends had become her family. She would do anything she could for them to not get hurt.
She was comfortable around them…not to mention she felt welcomed there. She didn't have to put up her guard about how to behave or what to say. She could just be herself—Tenten.
She didn't want to feel the same anguish she went through with her real family when they…
It was partly the reason why even though Gai-sensai was specialized in teaching taijutsu, she still became a weapon expert.
She wanted to be a long-range fighter.
That way she could oversee everyone and back them up if they needed help. She felt the need to protect them, knowing in return they were protective over her.
She considered how everyone would think about her death. Everyone would probably just shake their heads in pity that they'd lost one of their friends. She could almost imagine Gai-sensai and Lee mourning, looking at her grave while crying their heads off about not being there in time like some outdated soup operas…and Neji would…
Neji…
If there was someone she concerned the most about…then it would be him. Gai-sensai and Lee…they had a bond that was almost unbreakable. Most of the time, they were in their little own world and doing god-knows-what, leaving Neji and her to themselves. Even when she died, they would fine since they still have one another. However…Neji on the other hand…
She wondered what would happen to him…how he would react to this. After all, they parted ways after a dispute. What happened tonight…
Would he blame himself for her death? That he wasn't there to protect her when things happened?
Would he close off himself from the rest of the world once again, that he would isolate himself?
She was scared for him.
She knew the argument was more or less her fault. She should've stopped him from leaving and apologize to him then…but…
What could she say to him?
Neji was jealous of Isamu.
She knew…but she didn't want to bring it up…since she didn't even want to admit that fact to herself. It was a sensitive topic, since it would lead to other topics which she didn't want to discuss with Neji. Because in doing so, everything…the environment which she was so comfortable with will be forced to change.
She had underestimated her importance to Neji and overestimated the control Neji had over himself…
Besides, there was always a slight chance that he wasn't…a small hope that he wouldn't…
It wasn't the first time anyway. There were days when it was so clear what Neji was hinting at, but she pretended that she didn't understand them at all.
She didn't want anything to change.
How would their relationship affect their team, especially her relationship with Gai-sensai and Lee? Would they have to separate because Gai-sensai or the Hokage worried that she or he might let their emotions get the better of them during missions? Not to mention the Hyuuga clan, how will they react to her relationship with Neji? After all, she didn't have any bloodline. She wasn't an exceptional shinobi too…at least by their standards.
And…
What if Neji and her ended up argue like tonight? What if things just don't work out?
If they ended up breaking up, they will never be able to repair their relationship ever again. It would be stupid and naïve to assume that, they will never be as intimate as what they have now. If they'd ended the relationship horribly, they would probably never talk to one another again!
She had been heading toward the goal of being a great kunoichi just like Tsunade-sama for more than ten years, alone. She knew what she wanted and she knew how to get reach her destination.
That was what she had been doing for years. It was her purpose in life.
But Neji…
Neji was someone she had been dependent on for most of her life. However, she knew that Neji and she would never be able to go beyond friendship as long as she plays dumb.
Neji liked her…
And she…
If she ever let herself cross the line, she would never be able to go back to where she was originally at. But by now, it was already too late to change anything. She'd died after all…she should at least be true to her feelings for once in her life…
Maybe deep down, she really loves him.
She was scared when she was still alive; she didn't know what to do. What if she'd really imagined things; that she was really thinking too much? Maybe she was over-analyzing the relationship.
It'd taken her too long to get back the family that she'd lost.
She didn't want to lose it again.
Turning a blind-eye was the best thing to do…as long as he won't tell it to her face to face…she could continue to bury herself beneath some sort of a cover and pretend she didn't know what was going on…
Ironic, how thinking about this wasn't as hard after she'd died.
Even so…she couldn't deny the sense of regret that was rising in her heart. It wasn't because the fact that she didn't get to be Neji's girlfriend…but rather she didn't get the chance to make up with Neji…she didn't like the sense of dread in her either…as she realized that she will never be able to talk to nor see everyone else ever again.
She hated this place…
She wondered if she was going to stay here forever…in this place, in the darkness…. It'd felt like she'd been here for years and yet no large doorway illuminated by bright lights indicating to her where the exit was or any visible sign telling her what to do next.
She recalled the novels and movies that talked about how when people died, they became ghosts, either became vengeful over their enemies or protective over people they cared about.
Why couldn't reality be the same?
She didn't want to leave everything behind without knowing what would happen to her precious people…
Precious people…now she was talking like Naruto. Tenten supposed that it was impossible not to be exposed to Naruto's theories if you were around him.
For some reason, it was as if there was something in his body that would make people around him change for the better…it was impossible not to…
Tenten pressed her lips into a thin line.
But if possible…she wanted to see everyone once more…
And tell him that she was sorry…
Sorry for what?
Sorry that she was a coward…that she'd to wait till she'd died to get enough courage to sort out her feelings.
Sorry that she had stalled that long before wanting to tell him…she should've been more straight-forward to informing him about her thoughts.
She wasn't being fair to him…
But it was already too late…
She was already dead.
Like it? Hate it? Please review and tell me what you think about it!
Why isn't this story over yet? This is a question I want to ask myself…this chapter wasn't originally part of the outline sketch I did…but I guess it's only fair that I write about Tenten's thoughts and feelings after I wrote Neji's. So if I don't go blabbing off and stay on track…I should be able to finish the story within the next two chapters…including the epilogue.
I'm just wondering which story to update next. Since I don't have a lot of time to write all of them, so I want see what you guys want so I can prioritize.
Just a Mission?
Operation: hunt Shikamaru down?
Some Kind of Fairytale?
The Masochism Tango?