Now that I've gotten to a comfortable spot in this story, I'll probably be updating more often. It was just those two chapters in between where I wasn't sure what to write. But now I'm at the point I wanted to be at! New update, hope you enjoy!
Peyton lay in the bed, eyes wide open, staring at the ceiling without really seeing it. It was five hours later and she still hadn't slept a wink. Every time she closed her eyes images popped into her brain- Brooke's shocked face, Lucas's upset eyes… even herself leaning over him before other events unfolded. It was like she'd taken three steps backward. She was just starting to get comfortable in Tree Hill, but recent events left her sleepless and feeling scared. She hated it.
The alarm on the bedside dresser went off, signaling Lucas to wake up and get to school. Peyton saw his hand reach up immediately from his spot on the floor and slap the off button. Obviously he hadn't been sleeping either. She didn't say anything as he got up, stumbled to the closet, and began to change. She simply sat where she was, not moving, her eyes watching his every movement. He didn't notice that she was awake.
"Good luck with Brooke today," Peyton finally said as Lucas approached the door. He jumped at her voice and turned on his heel to face her. She gave him a weak smile.
Lucas smiled back, took his hand off the doorknob, and walked to the bed. "Did I wake you?" he asked.
Peyton shook her head quickly. "Didn't sleep," she murmured, and Lucas nodded knowingly. She pushed herself up, wrapping her hands around her knees like she'd done the night before, and Lucas took a seat beside her. She sighed, running a hand through her tangled curls. "So today's gonna suck, huh?"
Lucas grinned, exhaling loudly through his nose. "Oh yeah," he murmured, stretching his arms out in front of him. Reaching a hand up to scratch the top of his head, he changed the subject. "What're you planning to do today?"
Peyton shrugged. "I don't know- take a walk or something. I haven't really had the chance to walk around town. It'd be refreshing." She gave him a half-smile, raising her shoulders to her chin. He attempted to smile back, but she could tell his thoughts were still on Brooke. "Any clue what you're gonna say to her?" Peyton asked softly.
Lucas shrugged. "Nah, I figure I'll just wing it when I see her. She probably won't listen anyway."
Peyton nodded, biting her lip. "Okay. Just…um, just don't tell her why I've been staying here, okay?" she whispered. "I know it's the only explanation you've got but I think I should tell her myself." She dropped her knees over the bed and crossed her arms.
Lucas turned to face her, looking sympathetic and slightly shocked. "Of course I'd never tell Brooke," he told her. "That's your decision and you'll do it when you're ready." He gave her a weak smile, and a second later wrapped him arms around her. Peyton was momentarily shocked, but quickly wrapped her arms around him also and rested her head on his shoulder. They broke away a minute later, each looking more flustered than before.
Lucas got to his feet. "So I'm gonna eat some breakfast and then be off," he informed her, his face slightly red. Peyton nodded, swinging her legs onto the bed and resting against the pillows. "See you later."
--
Peyton tried to sleep for the next two hours but found it impossible. She heard Lucas leaving, and an hour later she heard Karen wake up and start cooking breakfast. The smell of bacons and eggs gliding through the door convinced her to finally get up. When she entered the kitchen she saw Karen putting two full plates on the table.
"I was just going to wake you," she told Peyton, smiling. "Did you sleep well?"
Peyton shrugged, feeling awkward and wondering if Karen heard the showdown with Brooke the night before. But it seemed Karen didn't know what had happened- she merely gave Peyton a sad smile, pulled out a chair for her, and said, "Things will get better. Why don't you sit down and have something to eat?"
The two sat next to each other at the kitchen table, silently digging into their breakfasts, occasionally breaking the silence with a few words.
"Are you planning to do anything today?" Karen asked casually, wiping her mouth with a napkin.
Peyton scooped another large spoonful of eggs on her plate. "Yeah, I thought I'd take a walk. I feel like I need to clear my head." She felt slightly uncomfortable talking to Karen. It had been a long time since she'd last seen Lucas's mom, when she was starting to regard her as her own parental figure. Half a year and a mess of events had changed how Peyton felt around Karen. She almost felt like a disappointment, and therefore tried her best to keep quiet.
Karen nodded, taking a sip of her coffee. "Well I have to go open the café soon, so I'll just clear up this mess and be out of your way." She smiled, picking up her plate and walked to the sink. Turning back to the table, she crossed her arms. "You know you can talk to me about anything, Peyton. I'm here for you."
Peyton nodded and forced a small smile. "I know," she said. "Thank you so much for breakfast-" She was cut off by the shrill sound of the phone ringing.
Karen hurried to the receiver and grabbed the phone. Glancing at the caller ID, she murmured, "Out of area," before pressing the end call button. "Who knows who that was. No point in answering, it was probably some solicitor. Anyway, you're welcome for the breakfast, Peyton. I'm going to take a shower and get ready for work and I'll see you later tonight. Lucas mentioned something about cooking us dinner." She grinned, obviously recalling Lucas's cooking skills. "I'll have money ready to order pizza, just in case."
Peyton laughed, also picking up her plate and getting to her feet. She smiled at Karen as she went upstairs, then placed her plate in the sink and reached for the phone. Checking to make sure Karen had gone upstairs, she dialed 69 and put the phone to her ear. After two rings the phone was answered.
"Peyton?" came Kyle's rough voice. He sounded like he hadn't slept in days. "Is that you?"
She felt her stomach drop, her nausea returning. The room was suddenly spinning, everything around her blurred into a mess of colors. Peyton let out a shallow, shaky breath before pressing the end call button and throwing the phone down on the table.
--
Hours later, Peyton sat on the grass by the river court, gazing in the water, completely lost in thought. She'd spent the entire day wandering the town, and by now her feel felt so swollen that she had actually taken her shoes off and was resting her feet in the cool grass. The sun was slowly inching more to the west, ready to set. Peyton felt no urge to leave- at that moment she felt completely at peace.
The sound of a basketball dribbling behind her caused her to turn. Lucas was approaching her, clad in his infamous grey sweatshirt and a pair of jeans, bouncing a ball at his side. He gave her a friendly grin and shot the ball at the hoop from the three-point line. It swished easily and bounced down the court into the grass, rolling toward the spot where Peyton sat.
"Hey stranger," Lucas said, taking a seat beside Peyton and reaching for the basketball. He bent his knees slightly and rested his arms on them.
Peyton smiled back, the wind blowing her hair into her eyes. "How was school?" she asked casually. Lucas lifted his eyebrows quickly and pursed his lips, and she nodded knowingly. "What did she say?"
Lucas laughed. "She didn't say much of anything. Well, except, 'Stay the hell away from me, bastard,' if that counts as conversation." He picked up the ball and began to spin it on his finger, looking lost in thought.
Peyton rubbed the back of her neck. "I'm sorry, Luke," she said sadly. "It sucks that you have to pay for all of this. If I'd just been honest from the start there wouldn't be any problems." Lucas stopped spinning the ball and placed it in the grass. "I'm sorry," she repeated.
Lucas raised one eyebrow at her and put his arm around her shoulders in a soft hug. "You've got to stop saying that," he informed her in a quiet voice. Peyton's hand automatically moved to his chest, the other still resting on her knee. "None of this is your fault, okay? Whether you want to accept it or not, that's the truth."
Sighing heavily, Peyton moved her hand off his chest and rubbed her eyes. "I know," she said in a breathy, tired voice. "It's just-" She paused, listening to the sound of cars passing and people talking across the river. Swallowing, she continued. "I just feel like I've messed everything up since I've been here. I've been putting it on you to take care of me and I hate that." She pulled herself out from his arm, turning her waist to look at him. Lucas had a concerned and slightly loving expression on his face. "I've been freeloading off you for days and I feel like you've sacrificed so much for me. Friends, trust, your girlfriend… It's not fair. I shouldn't be doing this to you. I don't want to keep messing everything up," she finished, feeling slightly breathless and her heart racing again.
Lucas looked at her with sad eyes. He reached a hand up to stroke her cheek, and Peyton immediately felt a chill through her spine. "Peyton," he began weakly, "you haven't messed anything up. You have to believe me on that. I wanted to be here for you- I still want to be here for you." He moved his hand from her cheek and grabbed her hand in his. Peyton felt her cheeks burning, but nevertheless allowed him to grasp her hand. His eyebrows were creased in worry as he continued. "I haven't sacrificed anything for you. To tell you the truth, I'd rather be sitting here with you than anywhere else in the world. Who cares if I haven't done something with Nathan in a few days? What does it matter if Brooke took something the wrong way? What matters most to me is you- how you're doing, what you're feeling. You coming here has been like- like a breath of fresh air for me, and I would never change it."
He was staring so intently into her eyes that Peyton felt like he was reading all her thoughts. She stared back at him, a burning, prickling feeling at the inner corners of her eyes. When she spoke, her voice was hoarse. "Sometimes I just feel so weak…"
Lucas squeezed her hand tightly, reaching his other hand up to her cheek. "You are not weak," he told her. "I know you're hurting right now, but if it's any consolation at all, I think you've been handling the entire situation amazingly well." He gave her a half smile. "You're strong, Peyton."
She gazed into his eyes for a long moment. "Thank you," she finally said.
Lucas smiled back. "No problem."
Peyton cut him off. "No, really, thank you." She was staring at him with a burning fire behind her eyes. She paused before continuing. "Lucas, you're probably the greatest person I know. These last two years haven't exactly been the best of my life, but you've always been here for me. Even when you were dating Brooke, even when we weren't talking…you always found a way to be right beside me." She swallowed. "When I decided to leave New York and come back here, I was scared. I didn't know who to go to, what to say. But when you came into my mind- it was like something just clicked. I knew right away that if I went to you I would feel safe… and happy. There wasn't a doubt in my mind. It's so rare that I feel like that with anyone." She pulled her hand out of his and placed it in her lap, a strange feeling coming over her. She felt both awkward and completely comfortable at the same time. Her head was spinning. "So thank you, for being here for me. I don't know where I'd be without you."
She stopped, feeling slightly breathless, her face burning against the chilly air. Lucas stared at her in complete silence, his mouth slightly open, his eyes searching hers. Peyton barely noticed that he was leaning closer to her, and she to him. She felt her gaze involuntarily move further down his face before glancing back into his eyes- and suddenly her own were closing lightly as the air around them grew thick and warm.
A second later, their lips were touching.