This is not good! Chapter 7: Funetals atre weerd, or maybe it's me, a harry potter fanfic

Okies.. Here I go…

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter…or anyone else for that matter. I also do not own anyone from Grey's Anatomy, Toto, Star Wars Music, or light sabers. Only the plastic kind. If I owned any of these, I would be very rich, and not be eating cheesecake like a little hobo in front of my computer.

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So, the guys were at a funeral and….

Sirius: (Whispers) I'm sooooo bored!

Remus: Shhh!

Sirius: Moony!

James: the wheels on the bus go round and round, round and round, round and round!

Sirius: the wheels on the bus go round and round, all through the town!

Remus: puts head in hands

James: the driver on the bus says move on back, move on back, move on back!

Sirius: the driver on the bus says move on back all through the town!

James: the babies on the bus go wah wah wah, wah wah wah, wah wah wah!

Sirius: The babies on the bus go wah wah wah, all through the town!

James: the mommies on the bus go shh shh shh, shh shh shh, shh shh shh!

Sirius: the mommies on the bus go shh shh shh, all through the town!

James: the daddies on the bus go read read read, read read read, read read read!

Sirius: the daddies on the bus go read read read, all through the town!

Remus: the Professor on the bus says please be quite, please be quite, please be quite!

Sirius: the students on the bus go NO NO NO! stands up and tap dances in the middle of mass on the bench he was sitting on All through the town!

Mourning friends/family: glare at Sirius

Sirius: I'M SO SORRY!

Remus: pulls Sirius back into the seat

After a few seconds, Sirius is bored again.

Sirius: I'm bored!

James: I've got a joke for you… gives Remus a side glance… but remus can't hear, okay padfoot?

Sirius: Is it that dirty?

James: fiendish look YESSS!

Sirius: Ooh! Details, girlfriend, details!

James: whispers joke in Sirius's ear just as the close friends and family go up to see the body

Sirius: starts laughing really loudly

Everyone else: Glare at Sirius again

Sirius: WHAT? I said I was sorry!

Everyone else: turn back grumbling

Sirius: Looks outside and sees a clown disco dancing. Gets up and does a heroic stance I'll be right back! Skips off giggling like a little girl

James: Looks outside HOLY COW!

Everyone: Looks back at him

James: Sirius is disco dancing with a clown!

Remus: I swear, people are going to drive me to insanity. Come to think of it, do we even know who this funeral is for?

James: No. We came for the free food. DUH!

Remus: We did? You guys told me this was Sirius's grandma's first cousin four times removed best friend's godmother's grandfather's imaginary friend's fried chicken's birthday party planner's…oh my God…I believed you…

Sirius: Gets thrown through the window by a giant teddy bear The platypuses are coming!

Platypuses: No we're not evil! We're so cute and cuddly and we won't hurt you! Everyone goes and hugs a platypus and everyone hugging a platypus gets stabbed

James: Oh, the platypuses, you betrayed us.

Sirius: I warned you! Does a ostrich call.

Ostriches: Come and stick heads in ground. Platypuses kill them too

Sirius: NO! My faithful flutters!

Burke (from Grey's Anatomy): Runs in I don't think we're in Seattle anymore. Toto runs in Come Toto, come.

Sirius: Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you?

Burke: I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy. I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy. I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy. I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy. I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy. I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy. I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy. I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy. I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy. I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy. I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy. I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy. I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy. I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy. I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy. I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy. I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy. I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy. I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy. I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy. I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy. I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy. I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy. I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy. I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy. I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy. I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy. I'm the doctor who's going to do the autopsy.

James: That's nice. Who is your daddy, and what does he do?

Burke: I don't know…but I'm not a lonely doctor…I have a girlfriend. And I work with this lady and she's evil and she has red hair.

Sirius: Voldemort has red hair! Maybe we're fighting the same guy…

James: Doctors and wizards unite!

Sirius: Punches hand in air and hit's a platypus Yeah!

Burke: Okay…I'm gonna go that autopsy now…

Meanwhile, at the platypuses headquarters:

Platypus leader: They seem to have forgotten us in their little conversation….things. I think now would be a good time to attack them with our weapon of mass destruction…things. They will not notice us marching in with our troop…things.

Little Platypus: How will they not see us captain?

Platypus Leader: They'll be too busy fooling around with their autopsy…things.

Back to the autopsy:

Remus: At least there's another intelligent being here…

Burke: SAY WHAT?

Shady figure: Comes and stands next to Remus

Remus: MUHH! Jumps away like a rabbit

Shady Figure: Pulls down hood. It's Cristina Are you smart?

Remus: Yes.

Burke: It's Cristina! My girlfriend! Starts skipping down path to meet Cristina

Cristina: Meredith! Get him!

Meredith: Starts break dancing right in front of Burke

Burke: Oh! Breakdancing!

Cristina: Tries to pull Remus into van UHH! Tugs on his sleeve but he doesn't move

Remus: Aw, you're so cute and little! Pats her on the head

Cristina: Yeah, well you're just too tall! Smacks him across the face Izzie! Help me!

Izzie: Comes over and starts pushing while Cristina pulls. Knocks Remus over and he lands on Cristina

Cristina: Flails under Remus EW! Cooties! Wizards have cooties!

Burke: Cristina's having a seizure! Walks over to help

Meredith: No! Starts jumping up and down in front of Burke, flailing her arms

Burke: Are you having a seizure too?

Izzie: Alex! Help us!

Alex: Jumps out of van and runs over and shoves Remus off Cristina. Picks Remus up with one hand and puts him in the van All is well in the merry old land of…where are we? You guys told me we were going to Izzie's apartment…to play…Scrabble!

Cristina: Yeah, Izzie doesn't have an apartment. She's Meredith's roommate. Stupid!

Meredith: Guys! We should go before…too late.

Addison: Walks in with her pitchfork Well, well, well. Let's see. This must be the convention of people I am going to kill!

Sirius: Wait…that's not Voldemort! You guys lied to us!

Cristina: Yeah we never said it was…you lied to yourself idiot.

Cristina, Meredith, Alex, and Izzie jump in van and start driving. They "accidentally" run over Addison while driving away.

Voice on loudspeaker: Dr Burke to autopsy! Dr. Burke to autopsy!

Burke: I'm on it! Pulls out light saber and starts running to Star Wars music. Kills androids while going to autopsy. Takes five minutes to do autopsy He was killed by magic!

Everyone (even dead people killed by platypuses): We all know that!