A/N: This is a really special chapter for me because of 3 things: A), this was put up on the 2 month anniversary of MFBFTDE, B) it will get me up to 18000 total hits for all my stories, and C) it will probably get me to 200 reviews! If I could do that, it would be amazing.
BTW: THANKS FOR GETTING ME TO 193 REVIEWS! I love you all!
Also: Some reviewer responses at the end. I had to answer some questions.
Thanks so much to Gemma for being my 350th reviewer ever! She also has reviewed every single chapter of this story. Gemma, you rock!
Disclaimer: Um, yeah. Harry Potter is not mine. Je ne possède pas le Harry Potter. Yo no poseo Harry Potter. Ich besitzeHarry Potternicht. How many languages do I have to say it in before you understand it?
The Death Eaters Go To The CircusVoldemort was sleeping soundly, having a wonderful dream about him and Mr. Fluffers co-ruling the world together, when-
"The carnival! The carnival! The carnival! The carnival!"
Voldemort sat up, rubbing his eyes. "What in Merlin's name-"
Lucius was bouncing up and down on his bed. "The carnival! The carnival! We're going to the carnival!"
"What bloody carnival?"
"The one downtown, silly. We're going to celebrate!"
"Celebrate what?"
"Christmas!"
"Lucius, it's the middle of July."
"Saint Patrick's Day!"
"We're not Irish."
"My birthday!"
"Oh, very well then. When are we going to this ruddy thing?"
"Now!"
Voldemort looked at the clock. "It's six AM!"
"Exactly! Come on, everyone's dressed and waiting for you."
Voldemort blearily traipsed downstairs, still in his hippo pajamas, to find Draco, his mother, Wormtail, Bella and Ro, Snape, Marissa, and Blaise standing around in the living room.
Lucius bounded down behind him. "Alright! Carnival time! Voldemort, let's pack up the Death Eater-mobile and hit the road!"
Silence.
"Oh, really," Lucius muttered, prodding Voldemort, who had fallen back asleep, with his wand.
"All right," Voldemort muttered, stumbling outside. "But I don't trust myself to drive."
"Ooh! I'll drive!" Lucius squealed as Voldemort staggered into the backseat.
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"Is the reason that I was woken up at six o'clock because the bloody carnival is five hours away?" Voldemort demanded angrily at 11.
"Yup!" Lucius said cheerfully.
"Well, then, why didn't we Apparate? Have you forgotten that we are wizards?"
Lucius' mouth formed a little "o" of comprehension. "Oops."
"I'm going to kill you, you know."
"Yeah. But we're here!" Lucius leapt out of the car, followed by eight exuberant Death Eaters and a tired and angry Dark Lord.
"Let's eat first!" someone suggested.
They ran inside the food tent, everyone heading to either the cotton candy stand or the McDonald's booth. Voldemort remembered his, er, incident with Mickey Dee's during their road trip, and ambled over to the tables to save one for the group.
Five minutes later, everyone was back, with food. Voldemort was very afraid, since Ro and Lucius were in the group that had gotten cotton candy.
"Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Let's go on rides!" Lucius was already pulling on Narcissa's arm.
"Okay, Lucy, pet." Narcissa immediately agreed. "Let's go through the Tunnel Of Love!"
"Psh, yeah right! I'm going on the Gravitron!"
Draco turned pale.
"What's the Gravitron?" Voldemort asked.
Draco muttered something around being spun around and strapped to a wall as a floor gave out.
"Sounds like fun! Bella, you want to go on it?" Rodolphus asked.
"Er… maybe later…"
"Are you scared?" her husband scorned.
"Me? Scared? No way! I'll race you there!"
Draco turned to his friends. "Let's go on the merry-go-round!"
Marissa and Blaise stared.
"No?"
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"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Peter screamed. "I'm going to die! Help! Help! Save me!"
"Wormtail. It's the Ferris Wheel. Chill." Snape rolled his eyes.
"But we're at the top! There's a hundred miles between the ground and us!"
"Try a hundred feet."
Peter whimpered.
All of a sudden, a loud noise was heard, and the wheel creaked to a stop.
"OH MY GOD!"
Snape laughed.
"We're going to die! We're stuck! We'll never get down! I'll never get to go to this year's Rat Animagi Convention! Oh, Merlin!"
"Wormtail! Calm down! It'll be fixed in a minute."
"We're sorry for the delay, but apparently a ten foot chunk of used chewing gum has worked in to the gear. It'll be a while, folks," an engineer called up from the ground.
Snape noticed Rodolphus and Lucius laughing hysterically down below, both holding packets of Drooble's Best Blowing Gum.
"HELP! MOMMY! I'M GOING TO DIE!" Wormtail shrieked.
"Get yourself together!" Snape yelled, slapping Peter across the face.
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Draco was not having fun. After he had suggested the merry-go-round, Marissa and Blaise had dragged him off to the bumper cars, where they had decided it would be fun to team up and destroy his car. Unfortunately, they were winning.
"Stop! I surrender! Truce! White flag! Ouch!" Draco screamed as they rammed into his car at the same time.
They exchanged evil grins. "Fine."
Draco sighed with relief.
He began to inspect his nails when- WHAM!
"I thought you were going to stop!" Draco shouted.
Apparently not.
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Voldemort peered suspiciously at a floating rubber duck. "Did you kill it yourself, or did you order it dead?" he asked a lady in the booth.
"Er… it's a toy, sir."
"Oh."
"Would you like to play? Two dollars for one duck or five for three."
"How does one play this…duck game?"
"You pick up a duck, and according to the size on it's bottom, you get that prize. Two smalls get you a medium, three mediums get you a large, and so on."
He handed her two dollars.
He picked up a duck. Small.
The lady's head was turned away. He put it back in the little moat and picked up another one. Small.
Small.
Small.
Small.
"Damn it, they're ALL smalls!" he shrieked. "This is a rip-off!"
He stormed away.
"Sir! Your prize?" the lady called after him.
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Narcissa batted her eyelashes. "Why, hello there, sir."
Bellatrix rolled her eyes.
The pimple-faced ride operated turned red. "I- er- uh, -eh, um-"
Narcissa smiled at the flustered young man. "What's your name?"
"I-um-eh-er-um Joe. I think."
"Joe," Narcissa breathed. "So… sexy. Joe, my sister and I only have three tickets each. You think you could let us-" she ran her finger down his cheek. "-slide?"
Joe nodded, and the sisters entered the fun house.
"That was absolutely disgusting." Bella said fervently.
"It worked, didn't it?" Narcissa laughed.
"We could have just bought two more tickets. But nooooo, my sister the slut has to seduce teenagers!"
"Slut?" Narcissa asked, observing herself in a distorted mirror. "I beg to differ. I was simply… using my given powers to get what I wanted."
"Cissy, your given powers are magic, in case you've forgotten. We could have simply killed the guy." Bellatrix hopped onto a moving staircase.
"Well, you have to admit, it was amusing."
The sisters stepped out of the fun house. "Bye-bye, Joe!" Narcissa called, waving.
Joe drooled.
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At the end of the day, the Death Eaters (minus Snape and Wormtail, who had Apparated home after Wormtail wet himself when the operator announced that they were having "major technical difficulties" and it would be a few more hours up there on top of the Ferris Wheel) piled into the car.
"Well," Voldemort said, yawning. "That was…interesting."
A battered and bruised Draco muttered something about possessed bumper cars, while Marissa and Blaise tried desperately to contain their laughter.
"'Interesting' is one word for it," Bellatrix said. "Lucius, do you know that your wife is a s-"
"miley person!" Narcissa finished. "I'm a smiley person."
"Yeah, a smiley wh-"
"oo, Nelly, would you look at that car!" Narcissa exclaimed as they whizzed by a hot pink Jeep.
"Narcissa was flirting with-"
"Danger! We went on the Ring Of Fire. It goes upside down, did you know that?"
Bella threw her hands up. "I give up!"
Narcissa smiled.
Then, an awkward silence filled the car, until-
"Lucius, why the hell aren't we Apparating?" Voldemort asked.
"Because we can't Apparate the car, Voldemort."
"Oh, yeah? Watch this!"
BOOM! The car exploded.
"Voldemort, now we have to WALK!" Lucius screamed.
"Or hitchhike," Voldemort said, sticking up his thumb.
A silver SUV with diamond rims pulled up next to them, and they all hopped in.
Voldemort looked to see who was their driver, and groaned.
"So…" Harry Potter said awkwardly, "where am I driving you all to?"
"Er… our secret hideout."
"Oh."
"Yeah."
Voldemort glanced over at the radio, when he noticed something on Harry's hand.
"Potter! You're wearing a friendship bracelet!"
"Yeah, so? All the Order members have them."
"But it was our idea first! You stole it!"
"Dude, chill." Harry turned on the radio to some heavy rap station.
Voldemort slumped down in his seat, arms crossed.
"Yo, fo' shizzle' my nizzle, we gangstas in da hood, yo, we gets shot at, yo!" the radio blared.
It was going to be a long five hours back.
A/N: Reviewer responses
PadfootRoxMySox007: Other HP fanfic sites? I don't believe I have. Why? Do you know some other good ones?
Tuxedocat: Um, I think I prefer the psycho hippos to the gun… :hides in Africa:
AinoMinako: Good idea! As you can see, I used it. So that's what SI means! Actually, Marissa was originally me, but then I was like, no. Avada Cruimperio is me. Marissa is still based on me, and I'm desperately afraid that she's becoming a Mary Sue, which is why she hasn't been in there as much. She wasn't randomly there, she's a Death Eater, so she was there, and I was like, fine, I'll put Marissa in for a little bit, so Snape can blow the wrapper at her. Yeah. If you think that I should have more of her, just let me know.
Paroxysmal Lupine: Alex! Ee! How did you find my story? Thanks so much for reviewing! I was so happy when I saw your review; I was like "Mom! Alex reviewed my story!" and she was like "That's nice, dear." LOL