A/N: Wow! 250 reviews! I have to tell you, I had a secret goal: that by the time I got to 17 chapters (which was my final chapter in The Difference) I would have double the final reviews for The Difference. It ended up at 120 reviews in 17 chapters, and now we're at 253 at 17, which is over double! So I'm so happy! I love you all so much!
SUPER-IMPORTANT: Okay, it's tough for me to admit this but... I need a beta. Sort of. I've noticed people saying I make some typos, which is bad, and most importantly, I need to know a 3rd party's opinion on the chapters. What I think is funny may not be what you think is funny. This chapter gave me a lot of grief and I'm not feeling too confident about it,and I'm worried you guys will be like, "Dude, this sucks." So if you are A: interested in this "position", B: have good grammar and spelling skills, and C: don't laugh at like, everying. I need someone who will only like the funny stuff so I can weed out the good parts from the bad parts. If that's you, then include your email address (don't forget to put in the spaces!) in your review, and I'll let you guys know next chapter who I've picked. Thanks!
I don't know how clear I made this, but your answers to the poll WILL have effect on this story. Most people said Marissa was OK now, but if she went Mary Sue, I'd have to get rid of her. So for you people out there (if any) who like Marissa a lot, go to my LiveJournal and post! Go!
OMG! For the first time ever, I got over 20 reviews for one chapter! In fact, I got 25! You guys must have really liked it.Thank you all so much!
Okay, I WAS going to do EVERYONE'S review responses in here, but I don't want to die. So there's a selected few in here, and the rest can be found on my LiveJournal.
hogwartsgirl52: Grr. Stupid fanfiction cut off the link. I find the Snape video via Google, but I couldn't find the Voldie thing. Could you re-type it, putting spaces in between the words next time you review?
ciararocks: Voldy didn't kill Nana for the same reason Harry didn't kill him: So I have humor to work with. LOL, originally, Nana was going to be his mother… except she's dead. Book 6 never said anything about Nana, just his uncle and Merope and his grandfather. By the way, I can't whistle either :)
Gemma: First off, thanks for being the first person to take the poll! I really valued your advice. I was surprised to see that you didn't like gay Draco. His OOCness is really on purpose, and I really like writing chapters with him in it. But that's ok, lol.
Elfbrat18: I loved your idea! But, it kind of makes Marissa edge closer and closer to the cliff that is Mary Sue-ness… so maybe you could tweak it a little bit so it's not Marissa's family, but someone else?
Paroxysmal Lupine: Alex! I'm glad you liked it. Yeah, David's the gay one… we think… don't tell anyone if he's not…. Send my your next chapter and I'll help, mon amiga. See? I can speak Spanish!
PadfootRoxMySox007: I apologize for speaking ofyour "minion"ness. Also, I have the world's oldest computer (Windows 2000) and whenever I get to the HP homepage, all I see is a blank white screen. If you could type in (with the spaces) the direct link to the HP fanfic site, that'd be great.
The Cotton Candy Kisses: Oh, I didn't mean it that way. Ew. Anyone who would ship Snape/Draco is psycho. And I am SO sorry if someone who is reading this is a S/D shipper.
Dracoluva411: I think the idea of Draco and Voldy would make The Cotton Candy Kisses WAY more than a little ill.
Starry's Thestral: I'm so happy you think my story's better than homework. I think so too. Since I'm supposed to be typing a science paper right now...
Forever Shia: I'm glad you don't think she's a Mary Sue. I was getting worried. Also, thanks for taking my poll!
Jedi Knight Padme: Whoa... I totally got your name confused with Jedi Knight Bus's. That's so cool! Great idea, Voldemort shall get match-maked... match-maked? Is that a word?
WARNING: This chapter has some sexual themed jokes. If you're not comfortable with jokes relating to Snape misspeaking and sounding like he's gay, or Peter finding a condom and not understanding what it is, then don't read this chapter.
Disclaimer: Harry Potter isn't mine.
The Death Eaters Have A Slumber PartyVoldemort browsed through the pantry, munching on a chocolate bar. "Popcorn… popcorn…" he muttered under his breath.
"What do we need popcorn for?" Snape asked.
"The party tonight. Ooh, we'll need some Pepsi too-Diet for Peter, that man refuses to go to Weight Watchers…"
"What party?" Snape asked, reaching up to the top shelf and grabbing the box of popcorn.
"The slumber party, of course!"
Snape stared at the Dark Lord, dumbfounded. "The slumber… party?"
"Yes. I sent Wormtail out to the DVD store to pick out some movies. It's at eight o'clock in the living room. Bring your P.J.'s and a sleeping bag!"
Snape stumbled off and met Lucius on the stairs. "Lucius, did you hear anything about a sleepover tonight?"
"Oh, yes!" Lucius exclaimed. "I've been looking forward to it for weeks! Which do you think I should wear, my teddy bear pajamas or my Marvin Miggs, The Mad Muggle jammies?"
"Neither!" Snape screamed.
Narcissa, who had been listening in, looked appalled. "Snape! I didn't know you swung that way-"
"That's not what I meant!" he howled.
"It's perfectly alright, Severus, you and Draco can-"
"Narcissa. I'm warning you…"
She smiled and laughed. "See, that's just the reason that I'm not coming." She leaned closer and whispered something in his ear. Snape turned bright red, and stalked off down the stairs.
"Voldemort," Snape said, approaching the Dark Lord. "Is it against Death Eater rules to sleep in the nude?"
"Snape! I had no idea you were into that kind of stuff!" Voldemort's eyebrows were raised.
"Not me!"
"You keep telling yourself that, Sevvy…" Voldemort walked off, chuckling.
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Eight o'clock found four Death Eaters in the living room, awaiting Peter's return from Blockbuster.
"Ooh! I'll do someone's nails while we wait!" Lucius suggested.
Everyone tried to discreetly scoot as far away from him as possible.
"Or we could play truth-or-dare!" Lucius continued.
"Hey, look! Narcissa on a hippo!" Voldemort pointed at the ceiling.
"Ooh, whe-" Lucius began.
Voldemort whacked him on the head with a Pepsi bottle. Lucius crumpled to the ground, passed out.
Everyone clapped.
Peter burst through the door. "I've got the movie!" he announced.
"Oh, good!" Voldemort exclaimed. "Put it in, Peter."
Everyone- minus unconscious Lucius- flopping down on their sleeping bags and eagerly awaited Peter to press Play.
Everyone waited to see what Peter had got for them…
"American History, 1810-1900?" Snape read. "You've got be kidding me!"
Peter shushed him. "This is the best part!"
Lucius sat up, rubbing his head. "Damn."
"I know!" Snape said angrily. "Peter, how could you get us this crappy movie?"
"No, not that. I left my Trivial Pursuit: Sleepover Edition at home!"
"Oh, no. What will we do?" Snape asked dryly.
Lucius sneered at him.
Rodolphus returned from the kitchen, holding a large bowl of popcorn and several Pixie Stix.
Lucius eagerly reached for the sugar, but Rodolphus held it over his head. "Uh-uh, Lucius. It's mine!"
"But I want some!" Lucius whined.
Snape grabbed a Stix and emptied over their heads. "There! No one gets them!"
"Er, Snape," Ro remarked. "I still have four left."
"Oh."
Peter's eyes were glued to the television as the elderly Muggle host explained the relevance of the materials used to make ships, compared to the engine of an early automobile.
"Fascinating," he breathed.
Voldemort had given the remains of the Pixie Stix to an ecstatic Lucius and Rodolphus, and was lecturing Snape on how growing boys needed their sugar. "There's evil out there, Snape. There's violence."
"That we create."
"And when kids-"
"Since when is Lucius a kid? He's forty-five, for heaven's sake-"
"Ahem. And when kids see that aggression out there in the big, bad world, what have they got left? Nothing. They've lost their innocence. Let them have their sugar, I say. Let them know nothing of the horrible things out there, just waiting for them, while they still can. Remember your childhood, Snape? Weren't you a naïve child once?"
"If I recall, you lured me into this hellhole of sugar-high forty-something's, mentally unstable Animagi, and messed-up plans for conquering the world when I was fourteen!"
"Just remember how it felt to be a kid, Snape."
"Yeah, Snape," Rodolphus added. "Find your inner rainbow."
Snape clenched his fists. "That is it! I'm sleeping on the couch!"
Rodolphus grinned. "Aw, honey, please stay in the bed?"
"THAT'S NOT HOW I MEANT IT!"
"Sure it isn't, Sevvy-poo."
"I'M NOT GAY, DAMN IT!" Snape screamed.
Wormtail, Lucius, and Voldemort looked at him in surprise. "What was that?" Voldemort asked.
"Good God, you're loud." Lucius remarked.
"Shhh! I'm trying to hear about the effects the Civil War had on Oklahomans!"
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An hour later, Peter's video was over, and he was rifling through Lucius's bag, looking for something to do.
"What's this?" he asked, pulling out something. "It looks like a one fingered glove… here's a wrapper… what's with the Indian on it? What does this say? Trojan?"
Lucius turned the color of a tomato mixed with a radish.
Rodolphus snickered. "Peter, that's not a one-fingered glove."
"Well, it sort of is, if you think about it," reasoned Voldemort.
Lucius snatched it away. "That's not mine. Draco must have put it in there."
"Oh, yes, because Draco has so many girlfriends these days," Snape said sarcastically.
Peter still looked confused. "What is it?"
Voldemort rolled his eyes. "I'm not telling him."
"Neither am I!" Rodolphus piped up.
"Same here," Snape and Lucius said together.
"Is it a balloon?" Peter asked.
"Yes," everyone said unanimously.
"Oh! Then why didn't you say so?" Peter asked.
"Because…Lucius is embarrassed. He has a balloon in his bag because he's training to be a clown." Ro explained.
"A professional clown?" Peter asked, eyes wide.
"Yes."
"Can he blow up the balloon for me and twist it into funny shapes?"
Lucius went red again and muttered something about that being more in Draco's area of expertise.
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"So…" Voldemort said later.
"So…?" Snape asked.
"What's new with you all?"
"Well," said Lucius conversationally. "Narcissa thinks that we should go to counseling."
"What for?"
"Does it have something do to with the balloon I found?" inquired Peter, who perhaps wasn't as dense as they had thought.
"No!" Lucius said, blushing. "It's just… well, now that Draco's out of school, she says I'm having difficulty dealing with the fact that I can't go yell at the School Board anymore. Whenever I was upset, or angry, Narcissa would let me cool off by going to Fudge (or Scrimgeour) and complaining about the way that Hogwarts was run. So I said we should have another kid and add some Aging Potion to it's bottle… and when she vetoed that, I dressed a house-elf up in stilts and said it was an 11-year-old looking for a home… still don't know how she figured that one out…"
"Well, Bella and I are great," Rodolphus said. "Isn't it funny how you're having trouble with Narcissa, while her sister and I are perfectly fine?"
"I know, it's so weird!"
"No, I mean like, I laugh about it."
"Oh," said Lucius, looking a little put out.
"Have you ever wondered how they get those ships into those bottles?" Peter wondered aloud.
"Ooh! Let's karaoke!" Lucius yelled, grabbing a microphone and putting on a CD. "Ready? I like big butts and I cannot lie, you other brother's can't deny-"
"Lucius. You're done." Snape interrupted. "That was worse then the Lestrange's rendition of Wannabe."
"Fine," Lucius huffed. He spotted something familiar protruding from Ro's bag. "Oh my gosh! Are those shoes Mizrahi? And is that a Fendi duffel? Ro, you have got to tell me where you got those. Wow! Are those jeans-"
"Lucius."
"-Dolce and Gabbana? Do I see Vuitton? I think I do!"
"Lucius."
"Oh my goodness! That's Gucci, isn't it? I know Gucci when I see it!"
"Lucius!"
"What, Rodolphus?" Lucius asked, annoyed, his hands on his hips.
"That's your stuff."
"Oh."
"What do you want to do now?" Peter asked.
Lucius glanced at his watch. "Oh, it's half past eleven already? I promised Draco I'd be home by now. I've gotta go."
"But…" Voldemort began, but Lucius had already grabbed his bag and Disapperated.
"Eleven thirty? I've, er… got a meeting to attend." Peter said shiftily.
"Meeting? What for?" Voldemort asked.
"Um… Rats Anonymous," he muttered, leaving before anyone could question him further.
Rodolphus grinned. "Hate to party and run…but I've got a date with a sadist at midnight, guys."
"Looks like it's just you and me, Snape," Voldemort said, throwing down a pillow.
"Yeah, about that… Potions seminar. Urgent. Gotta go."
"But-"
Snape had gone.
Voldemort threw up his hands in exasperation. "How can we have a sleepover when no one sleeps over?"
A/N: Did you like it? Review! Take my review poll on my LiveJournal, please!
REVIEW SKIT TIME!
Avada Cruimperio: Wow, Draco, aren't you excited? We've reached 250 reviews!
Draco: Not really.
Avada: But that means people like you!
Draco: Me? People like me?
Avada: Yes. I don't know why, but yes.
Draco:puts on top hat and gets out a cane:begins tap-dancing: Well, my darling said she's a-goin to leaveeeeeee-
Avada: But you're gay.
Draco: HOW DARE YOU!
Lucius: It'sthat time of the month for him, Avada. Have some compassion.
Draco: I WANT CHOCOLATE!
Avada: You can have some if you tell everyone to review.
Draco: Review review review review review!
Avada: Good. There's your chocolate, Draco.