Chapter Nine: Oh Crap

If the party favors for the impromptu celebration fully reflected the ecstatic moods of those attending, there wouldn't just be champagne and Lindir happily strumming a harp.

No, there would be banners and confetti and champagne fountains and a two-story cake and a full orchestra blaring out a rousing chorus of "Ding, Dong, the Wicked Witch is Dead."

But Legolas did bring out a bottle of wine compliments of his father, and all the dignified, noble Elves proceeded to get a little tipsy. Well, not really, but Jo could dream couldn't she? She was underage and didn't touch any alcohol, especially after a little stunt pulled by Iendil. Let's just say it involved her purposely drinking too much wine and trying to throw herself on Legolas while he slept.

Legolas. Jo's grin widened. Now she didn't have to pretend to be engaged to him!

However, a little prick at the back of her mind caused Jo's smile to falter. She knew there was something about Mary Sues that, in her joy, she was overlooking.

Duh.

Great, now the voices in my head are back.

No, crazy. I'm your conscious.

Look, I swear I didn't mean to kill Iendil.

Yeah, I know—your knife just 'slipped' out of your hand. But that's not why I'm talking to you.

Isn't it sad that you're talking to me at all?

…No. I don't know.

Okay, then why are you talking to me?

I think you know.

"No, I don't." Jo replied aloud, and clapped a hand to her mouth.

Elrond, who was sitting by her side and watching the others with amusement, gave her a strange look. "I beg your pardon, Lady Jo?"

"Uh…nothing…"

At that moment, Legolas chose to break the awkward moment with an even more awkward moment. He was especially glad for the turn of events, considering he no longer had a hormonal teenager trying to get into his pants.

"Lady Jo, tis a shame we are no longer betrothed," he said, kissing her hand and flashing a dazzling smile.

Jo's face felt like it was on fire. Bastard.

Iendil wouldn't blush.

Iendil also tried to violate him while he was sleeping.

…Okay, you've got me there…

"Why, yes, Prince Legolas. What a shame we can't join together in wedded bliss and rule Murkywood together." Jo smirked.

Legolas opened his mouth to correct her, then smirked and shut it. "I'm not even going to bother."

A lopsided grin spread across Jo's face and she elbowed Elladan. In an exaggerated stage whisper, she teased, "Gosh, Elladan, didya hear that? Blondie is finally catching on!"

Jo spent the rest of the week just relaxing. It was nice to no longer have an overbearing harpy breathing down your neck whenever you did anything remotely unladylike. She slept in late, ate as much as she wanted, and got to enjoy the company of the others—who were much more agreeable without the presence of said overbearing harpy.

At the end of the week, after lounging around in bed till lunch, she was taking a walk in the garden. She passed a particularly flowery patch of garden and froze. The flowers were moving a lot. And not just freaky-ooh-we're-Elf-grown-flowers-and-we-can-move-on-our-own moving, but freaky-omg-something-is-in-the-bushes moving.

She halted in place and slowly turned her head to face the quivering daisies. Without warning, a blonde head suddenly popped out of the flowers.

"Holy CRAP!" Jo shrieked, flailing her arms as she fell over backwards in surprise.

"Tee hee! You're like still so silly, BFF!"

"NOOOOOOOOO!!! WTF WHY DON'T YOU DIE!! I'LL KEEL JOO!!"

"Uh…Lady Jo?...What exactly happened here…?"

"Um?...My knife slipped out of my hands?...Over and over and over again?"

Copycat.

Hush.

"Well," Elrond smiled grimly, eyeing the blood stains all over the path. "…I don't really know what to say about that."

Yet, sure enough, several minutes later, all those present were once again subjected to Iendil's annoying, high-pitched giggling. And that's when everyone realized that Iendil, well, would not die.

And that's a bit of a downer, after all.

TBC…

Sorry it's kinda short, but I just ran out of ideas, but I wanted to update so you guys aren't left hanging. But yeah…she's back…it was good while it lasted, huh?