A Parental Guide

By Miss Willow

A.k.a

XXxFluffy-Pink-Socks

A/N: Argh! How do people manage to write so many author's notes and make them interesting? I'm sorry, readers, but I just don't know what to put in these notes… they seem, dare I say it… pointless. Ok, let's pretend I never said that and continue to read the story.

-x-

Hogsmeade trip, Hogsmeade trip; it was all everyone was talking about and more trouble than it was worth in my opinion. I scowled as yet another gaggle of giggling girls walked slowly past where the Marauders were sitting at the Gryffindor table, tossing their hair over their shoulders and batting their eyelashes in a way that made me feel physically nauseous. Honestly! Did they have no self-pride?! They could have been shouting "Shag-me-now-shag-me-now" at the top of their voices and managed to have been a hell of a lot subtler. Sirius must have caught me watching them and shouted over, "Not jealous are you, Rosa?"

"Oh no! Was it that obvious?" I pouted, sarcasm dripping from every decibel in my voice. The girls, obviously Martians (which would explain their attraction to Sirius) and therefore unable to understand sarcasm, all turned to glare at me… hmmm… time for me to make my escape… that girl nearest to Sirius was pointing her lip gloss at me in a most unsettling way… "Although I wish I could stay, I do have a village to visit. Bye."

"Aren't you forgetting something?"

"Not that I was aware of."

Sirius rolled his eyes, "You can't leave Hogwarts without me beside you. McGonagall's taken over from Filch on register duty at the doors, so there's no way you'll get through."

"You're right," I cursed. I swung my bag over my shoulder. "Let's go then."

"Excuse me?"

"LET'S GO!" I repeated loud enough for the whole of the Great Hall to hear.

"Erm, no, I don't think so," Sirius smirked at me in that most annoying manner again, "You see, I don't feel like going to Hogsmeade yet. You'll have to wait until I'm ready to go."

"Err, no, I won't! You're coming!" I exclaimed angrily, taking a threatening step toward him.

"Strange because it doesn't look like I'm coming with you, does it?"

"Look… if this is about me not letting you use the dormitory door, which is only fair as it IS on my side of the room, then, well, you're being selfish-"

"I'm being selfish!" Sirius interrupted with disbelief.

"-Yes, you are and I don't see what your problem is; you seem to be getting on just fine using the window! So I really don't see why you have to take this out on me!" I finished my speech with a frustrated look on my face, my brown eyes darting back and forth from Sirius to my watch and back again. If we didn't hurry then not only would we miss a very much-needed Hogsmeade trip (my mother's birthday was approaching) but we'd also have a grade knocked off our project assessment. No, there was no way I was letting that happen, Sirius would go to Hogsmeade, even if it meant dragging him there myself.

"I'm. Not. Coming." Sirius announced simply. He swung his legs up onto the table and raised his eyebrows at me in a challenging way. Was Sirius actually capable of talking to a girl without being a flirt?

"Yes. You. Are." I replied just as simply.

"No."

"Please!"

"No."

"I'll do anything!"

Something about how Sirius sat up straighter at this comment and moved his legs off the table made me regret ever saying it. "Hmm, that sounds interesting…"

"No, it doesn't," I warned him, narrowed eyes now watching him. The crowd of girls were still hanging around but had stopped their insane giggling, thank Merlin, and were now leaning in to hear what Sirius would say. "I meant within reason and you know it."

"Of course I did, which is why I have a few reasonable things in mind. Give me a few days to think it over." The few days idea worried me slightly but I was really too glad knowing that I would be able to go to Hogsmeade and buy mum that new cooking book she wanted.

"So you'll come?"

"Yeah."

"Yay! Thank you!" I could have kissed him at that moment… then my senses returned and my stomach was back to churning at the thought of involving in any romantic activity with Sirius Black. I shuddered.

"Ok. Let's just get this over and done with as soon as possible." Sirius said in a bored manner, standing up and heading out into the entrance hall, not bothering to wait for me. The other Marauders did not notice their best friend's departure; James was too busy staring goo goo eyed at Lily, Remus was reading a book of some sort and Peter I doubted had enough brain cells to notice that he had his arm resting in some marmalade let alone the absence of one of his friends. I sighed and walked out of the Great Hall, ignoring the glares I received when I passed by the Marauder fan club.

-x-

"We'll go to the three broomsticks first." Sirius said. It was more of a statement than a question, so I thought better than to say anything in reply. He had been in a bit of a mood since we'd left the school and I had soon realised that it was best to leave him be. We walked down the street in an awkward silence. It felt strange not to be talking to him… we always talked, even if it was just to insult each other…

I pushed the door open to the pub and held it open for Sirius. He brushed past me, not bothering to say thanks, and I glared after him. "Rosemerta!" I glanced over at the bar and saw the barmaid nod at Sirius and give him a warm smile over the tankard she was cleaning. He headed over to a table in the far corner of the pub and sat down, leaving me no option but to sit down opposite him. This wasn't how I'd wanted my Hogsmeade trip to be.

"Lily seems to be warming to James…" I said after a while, unable to bear the silence any longer. A smile appeared on Sirius' face at this comment.

"Really?"

"Yeah, 'course she is," I assured him, smiling myself, "Didn't you notice? She only hit James with her potions book half a dozen times yesterday, which is a whole two hits less than the day before, right?" Sirius rolled his eyes at this but he was still smiling which was something, I suppose.

The drinks were brought over and I couldn't help but snigger at Sirius' pathetic attempts to woo Rosemerta, who, being a barmaid, was obviously used to that sort of behaviour from her customers and merely shook her head with a smile when Sirius tried to throw her a chat up line. I was still laughing by the time she walked away.

Sirius scowled at me at first but his frown quickly changed into a sympathetic smile, "Still jealous then are we, Rosy?"

"It's Rosa and no," I snapped at him. I would have preferred to reply with an incredibly witty comment but was too peeved off about his use of my hated pet name to try and think one up.

"There's no need to pretend, Rosa," Sirius gave me a smug look from across the table, "It was inevitable. Every girl in Hogwarts loves me… who can blame them? I am the most desirable male in the school."

If he thought he was going to get away with that, then he was so wrong… "Actually, I quite like James." I said. I smiled innocently and took a small sip from my butterbeer, feeling the instant warmth spread throughout my body.

"Damn, its such a shame that you're married to me then, isn't it?" Sirius said back challengingly, "Must be hard not being able to ask him out-"

"-tell me about it! And sometimes the temptation to corner him in a deserted corridor and snog his face off is just too much!" Sirius was watching me closely, trying hard to keep the look of disgust about me cornering James from showing in his face. I smiled slyly. "You know, he would be so god damn good in bed… I can manage it now, the things he could do with his-"

"Ok! OK! I get it Rosa! You like James." Sirius interrupted, the disgust finally showing. He sat back in his seat and shook his head at me, before turning to look out of the window. "Hey… look! It's gay boy!"

I looked out of the window myself and saw who Sirius was staring at; Brendan. "That's my brother." I replied coldly.

"Should've guessed he was related to you."

"I'm warning you, Sirius, don't push me!"

"Oh, look he's coming in! He must have seen you, Rosa! How sweet for your sister- sorry, I mean, brother- to come and see you." I was about to reply when I noticed the person next to my brother, who was waving ecstatically over at us.

"Shit." I ducked under the table as fast as I could.

"What is it?" Sirius asked. He looked at me under the table and smirked.

"It's my mother; the embarrassment of my life."

-x-

Please R&R!