This chapter (as the title suggests) is the funniest chapter yet. It's probably the funniest chapter there ever will be. Just a little warning that this WILL make you laugh (I hope so, anyway). Well... here it is: The Funniest Episode!

Chorus (singing): The "Whatever This Show is Called" Show!

Quote of Legolas: Gimli, you're too fat and heavy to fly!

Chorus (singing): The "Whatever This Show is Called" Show!

Narrator: Insert quote here!

Chorus (singing): The "Whatever This Show is Called" Show!

skyheart15: I don't feel like typing more quotes so lets skip to the ending!

Chorus (singing): The "Whatever This Show is Called" Show! Bah dah dah bah!

(symbol crash)

Voice: Oww! My eye!

Another voice: Let's try that again.

(symbol crash)

Voice: Oww! My other eye!

Another voice: Again!

(symbol crash)

Voice: Oww! My spleen!

Another voice: What is a spleen?

Voice: I dunno, but I heard it on a cartoon and it sounds dramatic.

Chorus (singing): Bah dah dah bah!

(symbol crash)

Another voice: Don't you dare.

Narrator: Where we left off, well you remember. And if you don't just go back and read the ending. Now, in Rivendell, the Fellowship is taking classes, except that Legolas is an assistant teacher and Gandalf is on a wizard mission that is so secret I can't even tell you what it is. Aragorn is taking "How to Impress Elven Princesses". Boromir is taking "How to Control your Obsessions". Gimli is taking archery (to show Legolas he can) and Legolas is the archery assistant teacher. Merry and Pippin are taking "How to Correctly Launch Stolen Fireworks" fine print: "With Elfie and Lelfie". Frodo is taking piano lessons. Sam is taking "How to Cook in Dangerous Places Without Getting Encrusted in Lava". Lets look at some of them.

Narrator: Frodo is doing a great job so far, despite his missing finger. (piano playing in background) Let's check back with him later...

Later (with Frodo in piano lessons)

Narrator: Well, Frodo is having a hard time with the hard songs because of his missing finger. So, he decided to quit. Oh well!

Gimli and Legolas in archery lessons:

Archery Teacher: (looks around) I see that most of you are elves, so therefore I expect that you already know a bit about archery. Is that right?

Class minus Gimli: Yes.

Gimli: No, not really.

Archery Teacher: Good. Well, let's get started! I want you guys to pair up and try shooting apples off each other's heads so I can see how mush you already know. You too, Legolas, even though I know how good you are already.

(all the elves minus Legolas quickly pair up with their friends, leaving Legolas and Gimli)

Legolas: (looks around quickly) Um, (picks up rock) I can be with this rock... (quietly) please?

Archery Teacher: Legolas, please pair up with Gimli.

Legolas: (loud and dramatic) Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

Gimli: Oh come on, Legolas, it's not that bad! (puts apple on head)

Legolas: (shoots apple; gives Gimli the bow; puts apple on head)

Gimli: Hmmm. Let's see. Well, um, the... no that's not right. (mumble mumble) Ah-ha! This goes here and you hold this like that so then the arrow will go that-a-way (points at apple)! (arrow is backwards and bow is upside down)

Legolas: (looks real scared) Um, Gimli, your supposed to put the ar-

Gimli: Not now, Legolas, your ruining the moment! (shoots; the arrow flies over his head backwards) Ehehe... well... every expert was once a beginner... (tries again; the arrow flies to the side)

Legolas: (starting to relax, but then an arrow hits him in the stomach) Uhhhhh... (clutches stomach and staggers; another arrow comes and hits him in the head; he falls to the ground)

Archery Teacher: Gimli! You killed Legolas!

Gimli: Uh, I can fix that! (uses magic king powers to bring Legolas back to life)

Legolas: MARK MY WORDS, GIMLI! I WILL GET YOU! I'LL GET YOU IF IT'S THE LAST THING I DO! MWAHAHAHAHA! (laughs hysterically)

Gimli: Are you okay?

Legolas: (still laughing hysterically)

Gimli: (smacks Legolas)

Legolas: (back to normal) I needed that.

Archery Teacher: Okay then. Now that that's over, Legolas, I guess you can pair with the Rock. Gimli, I'll be instructing you privately.

Legolas: Yay! (shoots apple off Rock's "head")

Rock: ...

Boromir in "How to Control your Obsessions"

Narrator: So, the counselors have decided to test what Boromir has learned...

Counselor: (Takes out fake ring to see what Boromir does)

Boromir: (grabs ring) Mwahahahahaha, my preciousss!

Merry & Pippin in "How to Correctly Launch Stolen Fireworks" (fine print: With Elfie & Lelfie)

Pippin: Where are...

Merry: ... the teachers? Well I suppose we should wait a little longer for them. (about two seconds pass with "tick tick tick" in the background) Okay, I'm tired of waiting!

Pippin: Me too. Let's do something fun!

Merry: (whispering) Hey, Pip, I have an idea...

Merry & Pippin: (tiptoe as quietly as, well, hobbits)

(BOOM!)

Merry and Pippin: (their faces are black) Wow! Let's do it again! (about to light another firework)

Elfie & Lelfie: (each picks up a hobbit by the hair) What do you think you're doing?

Voice: Yes, what?

(Gandalf, who is apparently back from his super secret mission, comes around the corner)

Gandalf: (picks the to elves up by the hair, one in each hand) I thought that going on a perilous journey, in which you almost died many many times would teach you to stop putting your lives in danger, but I guess I was wrong. And what are you two troublemakers doing here?

Elfie & Lelfie: Actually, we're the teachers!

Gandalf: So, you two took a class with these two?

Merry & Pippin: We wanted to learn how to correctly launch stolen fireworks!

(suddenly Merry and Elfie come crashing to the ground with a and Elfie's hair is still in Gandalf's hand)

Everyone minus Elfie: Elfie! You wear a wig?

(Elfie has brown hair in a buzz cut)

Lelfie: Who ever heard of an elf with short hair? I'm embarrassed to be related to you. I never want to see you again! (stomps out)

Gandalf: Don't let it happen again! (stomps out)

Merry & Pippin: Um... bye. (walk out)

Elfie: (sob) This wig was supposed to be magical!

Meanwhile, with Lelfie and Saruman...

Saruman: Hello, nice little girl, I believe we've met before?

Lelfie: Yup.

Saruman: Well, I need another favor.

Lelfie: Sure thing! What?

Saruman: I'm afraid it's a little more complicated than before... (whisper whisper)

Lelfie: (nods)

Later...

Lelfie: I got the stuff. (evil grin; throws down Sam's cooking stuff and Frodo, all tied up)

Saruman: (evil grin) Excellent. One more thing...

"Dot Dot Dot"

(the Fellowship, Elrond, and some other elves have gathered, thanks to Lelfie)

Saruman: Samwise Gamgee, please step forward!

Samwise Gamgee: (steps forward)

Saruman: I challenge you to a battle.

Sam: No way!

Saruman: I believe I have something you want... (reveals Sam's cooking stuff)

Elrond: Gasp!

skyheart15: And he actually said the word "gasp". If he just gasped, I would have put gasp in parenthesis.

Sam: My cooking stuff!

Saruman: (reveals Frodo)

Elrond: Gasp!

Sam: Mr. Frodo! (to Saruman) What do you want?

Saruman: I already told you what I want, you idiot! I want to battle you!

Sam: If I win?

Saruman: I will return your cooking stuff and your precious little master.

Sam: And if I lose?

Saruman: (evilly) I get to take over Middle-earth! Mwahahahaha!

Everyone minus Sam, Lelfie, and Saruman: No! (shake their heads no)

Sam: (looks over at his cooking stuff and then at Frodo) I... I accept your challenge.

Saruman: And since Elrond is here, it's official!

Elrond: Gasp! Middle-earth is doomed!

The Great Battle

Sam: (takes out sword and charges) For Mr. Frodo! And my cooking stuff!

Saruman: (steps to side)

Sam: (smashes into wall and his sword flies out of the battle arena; Sam gets up and charges again; he knocks down Saruman and starts tugging at his beard)

Narrator: But suddenly, his beard came off!

Gandalf: Saruman! You have beard extensions? And after all these years of teasing me for having a shorter beard?

Saruman: What did you expect? I'm evil!

Sam: (was knocked off Saruman)

Narrator: So, Saruman sat there crying because everyone was making fun of him. But, Sam was weaponless!

Sam: Aragorn! Toss me your sword!

Aragorn: No way, this is the Sword that was Broken! I'm not just giving it to a hobbit!

Elrond: Gasp!

Sam: Boromir! Toss me your sword!

Boromir: No way, preciousss!

Elrond: Gasp!

Sam: Legolas! Toss me your sword!

Legolas: All I have is a bow, and you don't know archery!

Elrond: Gasp!

Sam: Gimli! Toss me your sword!

Gimli: I have an axe and it's almost as big as you are!

Elrond: Gasp!

Sam: Bilbo! Toss me your sword!

Bilbo: I gave it to Frodo!

Elrond: Gasp!

Sam: Mr. Frodo! Toss me your sword!

Frodo: I'm kinda tied up right now!

Elrond: Gasp!

Narrator: But Saruman stopped crying and was getting up.

(dun dun dun!)

Elrond: Gasp!

Sam: Merry! Pippin! Toss me a firework!

Pippin: (slowly takes firework out of his pants)

Elrond: Gasp!

Gandalf: I warned you!

Sam: But I don't know how to use this!

Merry: We do!

Pippin: But only because it's stolen.

Gandalf: From me!

Sam: (rubs stick on ground fast; it catches on fire)

Merry: So, light the end...

Sam: (lights the end)

Pippin: ...and hold it pointing at Saruman...

Sam: (holds it pointing at Saruman)

Merry: Let go... (pause) ...NOW!

Sam: (lets go; the firework zooms toward Saruman)

Elrond: Gasp! He's picking up his staff! He'll stop the firework!

Gandalf: It's not just any firework, though! It's MY firework! That THEY stole!

Frodo: I'll never forget you, Sam!

Sam: You're right! You'll never forget me! Nobody will ever forget me! I will save you!

(In slow motion, and very dramatically, Sam dives at Saruman's staff!)

Sam: Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! (hits the ground about 10 ft away from Saruman and is too hurt to get up) Mr. Frodo! I'm sorry! I've failed.

Elrond: Gasp! It's almost there!

skyheart15: I have no idea why that firework is so slow, but it is!

Gandalf: Beard extensions, haha!

Saruman: I told you to stop making fun of m- oomph!

(POW!; some elves untie Frodo)

Frodo: Sam! You did it! You saved me! You're a hero!

Sam: No, Mr. Frodo, I'm not. It was Merry and Pippin's firework and Gandalf who distracted Saruman! They're the heros!

Frodo: Don't be silly! Think of all the times I would've died without you! Shelob! The orcs! The whole journey!

Sam: ...

Frodo: You're more than just my gardener! More than just my body guard! You're my friend, Sam, and I never would have done anything without you! You're the reason I was able to get up and keep going! Without you, I would have given up to the power of the ring!

Sam: Maybe you're right, Mr. Frodo. Maybe I am a hero!

Everyone, including you (whoever you are): Awwwwwwwww!

Sam: (cheerful and peppy) Now, who wants some tomato soup?

Elrond: Gasp! That's my favorite!

Narrator: Way to ruin a touching moment

Gimli's Flashback

(music in background)

Gimli: I got 2 already!

Legolas: I'm on 17!

-next scene-

Gimli: Ha! 18!

Legolas: I'm on 2 dozen!

-next scene-

Gimli: 25!

Legolas: 3,456!

-next scene-

Legolas: Gimli, you're to fat and heavy to fly!

-next scene-

Gimli: Who wrote Burger King on my back? LEGOLAS?!

-next scene-

Archery Teacher: Legolas, I guess you can pair with the Rock (instead of Gimli).

Legolas: Yay!

-next scene-

Elrond: Gasp!

Gimli: Hey, this is a private flashback!

-next scene-

Gimli: You wrote Burger King on my back AGAIN?

-next scene-

(shows Legolas attacking Gimli after the eagle incident)

-next scene-

Legolas: PU! Gimli, what have you been eating!?

-next scene-

Legolas: You can't do archery, but I can use an axe! Haha!

-next scene-

Legolas: Stupid beard! Stupid dwarfy frizzy beard in a cute little braid!

-next scene-

Gimli: You wrote Burger King on my back a THIRD time?

-end of flashback-

Gimli: Mwahahahaha! Revenge is mine!

Gimli's Revenge

Narrator: Legolas wakes up... he has a beard drawn on him in sharpie and "Wendy's" written all over his body.

Legolas: Eeew, a beard! And what in Middle-earth is a Wendy's? I'll get that blasted dwa- ooh, bean tacos! (fart)

Gimli: Eew! Legolas, what have you been eating?!

Legolas: Tacos! I love tacos!

Commercial Narrator: I hope you enjoyed this episode! Just to tell you, the next two episodes are random events that have nothing to do with the plot of the story. Oh well, they're still funny. See you next time!