Hey everyone, well first I want to apologise for taking so long to update. I didn't realise how long ago it was until I read my A/N from chp13 and woah that seems a lifetime ago!

I'm not going to give you my excuses because there are various reasons why this has taken so long of them, some totally justified others maybe not so, lets just say I either haven't had the time or haven't been in the right mindset.

Well its just over a year since I started this and I NEVER thought it would be so long or that I would have so many wonderful readers. I am partly pleased and also really sad to say that this is the fianl chapter. I'm pleased I have finished but am also really going to miss it -sad I know.

Reading through I realise have been on a incredible journey with this fic and I feel I have grown with it and it shows through my writing. I'm not saying that my life has drastically improved since this time last year becuase it certainly hasn't but I feel I'm on the right track again. Well I know this sounds like pointless rambling but I just want to emphasise how I really dont think this fic would be complete or that I would be here writing this if it wasn't for the people who have read, reviewed and supported this fic.

I specifically want to thank Laura, red-wax, hennahito-ckbc, Sarah, freakzoid, andrewhot and SymphonyofSound for your continued reviews and faith! Also Emma Sophie and Dave for their help with this fic. Of course a big thanks to Helena for her masses of help with this and her speedy and wonderful betaing. I'm sure I've missed someone out but its not intentional!

I'm not sure why I'm doing this here as I hope to write an epilogue and possibly a prologue, depends if I can let go! So I'm going to stop chatting this rubbish because I'm sure you don't want to read it let you get onto the fourteenth and final chapter. xxx

Justin's POV

'...Happy Birthday Dear Brooke and Suzie, Happy Birthday to You' the girls closed their eyes blew out the candles on their cakes as we cheered. As the girls and boys around them asked her what she wished for her eyes searched for mine, locked with them for a moment before laughing and refusing to tell and shaking her head at all of their guesses.

Andrew and I had not moved from our spot by the garden fence for nearly 2 hours. Partly to avoid my parents and partly because I couldn't bear to be inside my childhood house. I had gone inside to get through to the garden and once to use the bathroom. Andrew had gone in for drinks for me and I had only moved into the centre of the garden to watch the girls blow out their candles. The house and garden were, as promised, totally pink and princessey and Brooke seemed to be having the time of her life. Unfortunately I needed the toilet again so I stood up, telling Andrew where I was going and walked inside. The house seemed so familiar and yet totally different at the same time. I reached the toilet door to see one of the guests vomiting into the toilet after eating too much cake. The woman helping him looked up apologetically, 'Sorry, there's a bathroom upstairs, second door on the right, it's out of bounds to the kids but I'm sure Sara won't mind, he might be a while.'
I nodded my thanks. I didn't recognise her and she obviously had no idea who I was and turned to head up the stairs. Memories flushed over me. Although it seemed my parents had done their best to erase all traces of me, the marks on the wall measuring how I'd grown had been painted over, the family pictures at the bottom of the stairs had been replaced with one without me and even the vase I'd bought my parents home from a school trip had been swapped with another unfamiliar one. But they couldn't remove everything - the dent in the skirting board from when I knocked a picture off the wall was still there, it seemed the stain on the third step from the top, where I'd tripped bringing my Mom a coffee, that wouldn't come out no matter what stain remover we used still refused to budge and the wallpaper on the landing that I'd been allowed to pick out since I was so helpful with the new baby surrounded me. I walked into the bathroom and was shocked to see it had been re-decorated.

As I left the bathroom I walked past my old bedroom. The door was shut but I couldn't resist opening it. I wish I hadn't, nothing I had noticed on the way up could have prepared me. Everything was gone, all my stuff, the walls were re-painted, the bed sheets were new, it could be a totally different room, it looked like a hotel room and it gave me chills. I shut the door and headed back downstairs sitting down next to Andrew again. He looked up from his drink which he was swirling round the glass. 'You took your time'
'Some kid was puking up'
'Nice' was all he said. The present opening was taking place and as my Dad handed Brooke my present, it was a fairy light thing that Kate had assured me she would like, his face hardened and Brooke ripped the paper off. A smile split across her face and she ran over to thank me giving me a hug and a kiss on the cheek. 'Do you like it?' she nodded
'Yeah!' Before returning to the mass of wrapping paper she was slowly becoming surrounded in she smiled at Andrew and gave him a hug. 'Thank you Andrew.' As she walked away I could see the death look my Father was shooting me.
'You did it didn't you?' asked Andrew. I nodded. 'Why?'
'Because I love you.' He raised one eyebrow at me. 'And because I knew it would piss him off and there's not a single thing he can do about it right now' I admitted. He nodded as though he knew this all along.

Andrew's POV

During the party Justin seemed pretty down. He didn't want to go in the house as it reminded him too much of when he lived there and of how long ago that all seemed. A couple of people came over to us saying how nice it was to see Justin and how good he looked. When he went inside to the bathroom he came out seeming even more depressed although he wouldn't say why.

After the party when all the guests had gone and we were helping to clear up, Justin's Dad went over to him and started having a go. I guessed it was about the card on Brooke's present: lots of love from Justin and Andrew xxx.
I walked over to hear 'Well it wasn't funny' and Justin's reply
'It wasn't a joke.' His Dad didn't say anything so I just took Justin's hand and led him away from the argument.
'Was it worth it?' I asked. He nodded, a look of pure pain in his eyes that broke my heart. 'You wanna go?'
'It's like I never existed' he said 'All my stuff is gone, pictures of me are gone, I may as well have never been born.'
I shook my head. This wasn't right, he was supposed to be the strong one, the constant in our relationship and here he was falling apart in front of my eyes. I wanted so badly to kiss him but I knew it would only make things worse. I settled for brushing my thumb over his cheek. 'It's their loss, they don't know who they're missing. C'mon lets go' We made our way over to Brooke and they said goodbye. As Justin turned to go he turned back.
'Hey Brooke, you got my number right?' she nodded 'Good.' We went through into the kitchen and he told his Mom we were leaving. She nodded before speaking. 'I love you, you do know that right?' Justin shook his head. 'Whatever you need to tell yourself so you can sleep at night, but from the looks of this house, the house I lived in for 17 years, I'd say Brooke was an only child.' He turned and walked out of the door and I drove him back to his apartment.

John wasn't in and out of habit we walked into Justin's bedroom. Justin lay back on the bed and sighed his eyes still full of pain.
'I don't know what I can do to help' I admitted, Justin had always known what to do when I was down but now I couldn't do the same for him. Justin just shook his head so knowing there was no one here this time to object I leaned forward and pressed my lips to his. He started to kiss me back. I moved to his neck kissing and nipping the skin there. I undid his shirt moving onto his chest sucking first his right nipple and then his left. I trailed kisses down his abdomen as I undid his jeans pulling his boxers down with them. I took him in my mouth concentrating on giving him as much pleasure as possible and taking as much of him as I could.

As he came, I swallowed and he pulled me back up for a kiss. I know he was able to taste himself in my mouth and he kissed me deeply. I pulled away but I could still see that self destruction in the back of his eyes. I took a breath and said what I've known for a long time but had barely admitted to myself, let alone risked telling him. Something about him laying there, totally vulnerable and open to me made me do it. 'I love you so much,' and to my delight a smile split across his face. 'I love you too.'

A/N Hmm maybe a bit predictable but I hope it was worth the wait and you will review because I love to hear what you think. xxx