Disclaimer: I own who I own, which doesn't include any boys or Kim…or Shego.
Charchee: Shegal92 and I are having an awesome time making up Blackmail for this. It's at times a little complicated but very funny. Hope you enjoy this chapter.
Shegal92: Yeah, Charchee, it's been lots of fun making up Blackmail for each person. Some of you still might be wondering what Blackmail is. Well, let's just let the girls tell you that part. As Charchee said, hope you enjoy this chapter and please review.
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Ron watched as the girls fetched tapes from their backpacks. What were they doing? Even Kim had brought a tape. Ouch, the ropes around his wrists really dug into his skin. They sure weren't very gentle with their crushes, but they were villainesses. Who knew he'd strike it rich with the evil chicks? There were two for-sure girls fighting over him and one maybe. Who would have guessed Shego had dibs on him? But which girl would he choose? Not Shego, that's a no-brainer. Nothing more awkward than having your arch foe's assistant as your girlfriend. Especially if Kim's, well Kim-ness had anything to do with it. His best idea was to not choose before he had to, get to know them, and enjoy watching them catfight. But from what he had watch on "Pals" and "Agony County", he'd have to choose sooner or later. Hopefully later.
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"So, what is this game called again?" Monkey Fist brought out the tape Drakken had told him to bring. He had made sure it was embarrassing, but so far he didn't see why it needed to be.
"It's called Blackmail." Drakken explained.
"And how do you play?" Killigan looked at the tape in his hand and sighed. Any game that involved an embarrassing home video couldn't be good.
"I don't really know." Drakken confessed.
"THEN WHY'D YOU PICK THE STUPID GAME?" Dementor yelled.
"Because…because I'm trying to impress Shego!" The room went dead silent after Drakken's outburst. Drakken rethought what he had said.
"No wait, that came out wrong…" Drakken began to panic as they kept staring at him. Beads of sweat began to form on his eyebrow. This was not the place for a slip of tongue.
"Dude, why didn't you tell me I was like, hitting on your babe? I would have stopped, seriously I would've." Pink spots emerged from blue skin and his small hands curled into fists.
"Shego's not my girl. It is a strictly business relationship."
"Sure, uh huh. Whatever you say."
"You don't know what you're talking about. She is the hardest person on this planet to please and is always saying something cruel."
"You do love a challenge."
"Oh please. I'm twice her age. It'd probably be illegal if we were hooked up."
"What do you care about being legal, you're a super villain. Plus, she's not a minor making it perfectly legal for her to love whomever she pleases. Meaning you."
"I'm telling you she'd rather have my head on a silver platter than go out with me."
"She had a romantic dinner with you that one time."
"She was under the influence of an emotion chip thing."
"She was in love."
"Would you rather me lie and say I LOVE SHEGO?" Looking across from the kitchen, Drakken saw Shego collapse to the ground.
"I have a feeling she only heard the last three words."
"Shut up, monkey man."
&&&&&
Mere minutes later, the girls assembled into the boy's room. Shego came in first, with Metaphor and Mischief trailing behind. Shego and War Hawk stood in front of Drakken, with the other girls facing the other boys.
"What was that about?" Shego hissed.
"What?"
"Declaring that you loved me?"
"It's a long story. Long story short, they made me say it." Shego contented herself with this answer. It was either that, or… she felt her nerves spaz.
"So, are you ready for defeat to shove you face first in the ground?" Shego folded her arms and War Hawk mimicked her.
"Depends. Are you ready to eat your words with a side order of shame?" Drakken smirked.
"Let's just wait and see." War Hawk snickered.
"What was that?" Shego turned to her.
"My evil snicker." She answered.
"You don't evilly snicker. They call it an evil laugh for a reason."
"Maybe I can't evilly laugh. Maybe I'm evilly laughed handicapped." Pause.
"You are the strangest human being I have ever had the pleasure of knowing."
"Right back at you." Shego turned back to Drakken.
"First, we need a viewing screen and a VCR." Drakken snapped his fingers and Motor Ed brought out one. He hooked it into an outlet. Drakken whipped out a remote, flashed it at Shego, and pressed the button. A huge screen slowly came down from the ceiling and a few of the guys backed up.
"Wow, never had Blackmail on a big screen before." Artica noted. They stood there for a minute or so. Finally, Monkey Fist flat out asked.
"How do you play Blackmail?" The girls exchanged confused glances. They didn't know how to play Blackmail? But it was only the greatest game in the history of villainy! How could any villain not know how to play? Maybe the guys were more clueless than they had thought. Shego rolled her eyes.
"The object of the game is to…"
"…humiliate yourself." Golden Arrow cut in, stepping in front of Shego. Shego shot her a questioning look, but said nothing.
"It's a chance to laugh at yourself and the silly things you've done, right Shego?" Golden Arrow glanced at her. Trust me, she mouthed, I know what I'm doing. Shego chewed on the information…and something clicked together.
"Yeah, that's it." Shego nodded her head and felt a kick in the shin. She spun around to face War Hawk.
"That's not Blackmail." She whispered.
"Blackmail's when you embarrass the other people." Shego saw Drakken looking questioningly at them from the corner of her eye.
"No, that's the other game we play. Blackmail's totally different." War Hawk caught on.
"Oh yeah, that's right. I was thinking of that other game." Shego turned back to Drakken and spread her tapes out like a magician with his deck of cards.
"Are we ready?" Drakken hoped he'd have the courage to laugh at himself. And so, they approached the VCR.
"Something's not right." Monkey Fist murmured to Gemini.
"You've got that right. Did you see how confused they all were when Golden Arrow said that?"
"It didn't look planned. Like a last minute twist of fate." Gemini looked at Monkey Fist.
"I don't know what War Hawk whispered, but it was something about another game. And I'm thinking what was actually the other game is this game."
"Drakken's going to get his butt handed to him if that's the case." Drakken and Shego stood toe to toe, tapes in hand. War Hawk stood before them, looking like a referee.
"Here's how this will work. You each get three turns to show one tape. Whoever has the most embarrassing tapes win. No trading at any time for any reason. Be free to laugh as loud and hard as you want. We'll flip a coin to see who goes first." War Hawk pulled a coin from her pocket.
"Call it, Shego." Drakken said nervously. War Hawk gave Shego a motion only she or another villainess could understand.
"Heads, let it fall." Shego proclaimed. The coin was tossed into the air. They watched as it flipped over and over, slowly coming back down to the ground. The quarter spun on its rim, tilted, and made a decision. War Hawk, Shego, and Drakken all leaned down. The rest held their breath.
"Tails, Drakken goes first." War Hawk and Shego arose, but Drakken stayed down.
"Is that an Oregon quarter, because I've been looking for that one…" War Hawk slid it out of Drakken's grasp.
"No, it's just a regular quarter."
"Too bad." Drakken browsed the tapes in his hand. He had several of himself…and one of Shego. Thankfully, they were clearly labeled. He popped one in and him and Shego backed up to watch it.
Snickers already arose as the camera showed Drakken in…a leotard. There was no tutu, but there were ballet slippers on his feet. He strode around, twisting and turning gracefully. There was no mistaking the swift ballet music in the background or that it was a dance studio. They all came to one conclusion; Drakken had taken ballet.
"That's my Drewbie! He's going to steal the spotlight!" And there was absolutely no mistaking the female voice behind the camera as Drakken's mother. Everyone laughed, but Drakken laughed hardest of all. He felt like a burden had been lifted since his secret was now out in the open. The tape ended abruptly. Shego ejected Drakken's tape and tossed it to him.
"That's going to be hard to beat." She murmured but smirked when her back was turned to everyone. Golden Arrow was a genius! She pushed her own in and returned back to her spot on the floor next to her opponent.
Shego watched as she stared into the camera lens. She was giggling as the doorbell rang in the background.
"Little does he know." She said ominously.
"Drakken! It's for you!" Drakken appeared in the background, but Shego still was closer to the camera. There was an opening of a door and then a little girl's voice piped up.
"Sir, we heard from an anonymous source you wanted to buy some Pixie Scout muffins?" Shego smirked.
"Um, excuse me ladies but I never wanted any…"
"Sir, we're a very busy troop. Can you just buy the muffins so we can go on our way?"
"You must've heard wrong because I don't want any muffins." A girl grabbed him by the collar and got his face a few inches away from hers.
"Buy the muffins." She let go.
"I'm not going to buy any muffins; I already bought them from the last troop." There was a moment of silence and Shego looked over her shoulder.
"Pixie Scouts, attack!" A group of six or more eight year girls charged at Drakken, knocking him over.
"Shego!" He screamed. Shego just laughed.
"This is Shego, living a slow death inside the lair of Dr. Drakken. Over and out." The screen went blue after the on-camera Shego turned it off. A few people dared to laugh. Drakken looked at Shego.
"What was that about, living a slow death inside the lair of Dr. Drakken?"
"Something dramatic to say." Monkey Fist cleared his throat.
"Shego, would you mind explaining why it was an embarrassing tape of Drakken instead of yourself?" Shego looked at Golden Arrow. They had forgotten not all of the villains were as stupid as Drakken.
"She was there the whole time, right in front of the camera. She was the main object, the camera just happened to show Drakken getting stampeded over by a troop of Pixie Scouts." War Hawk barely finished her statement before giggling.
"Either way, it's Drakken's turn again." Drakken ejected the tape and put in his own, setting Shego's on top of the VCR. He was more skeptical this time. Her video had been embarrassing for him, not her.
Four boys stood among various strange instruments. Kim immediately recognized her father, Drakken (when he was still Drew Lipsky), and Professor Chen. It took Kim a minute to recognize Professor Ramesh but maybe that was because he was wearing an ugly neon green wig.
"One, two, three, four!" James Possible counted off, rocking the microphone stand so hard it nearly fell over. Drew started playing his tuba and Bob Chen started banging the heck out of his bongo drums. Ramesh clanged two garbage can lids together, acting like they were…symbols? Meanwhile, James was strumming on the fake guitar he had gotten last week from the dollar store.
"La la la, laaa la laaaaa, la la laaaa." James belted out. The band stopped.
"Dude, that's not the song we wrote." Bob put down his bongo drums.
"I, um, forgot the song at home."
"Don't worry, I memorized it!" Drew put down his tuba and grabbed the mike.
"Ooooooh yeah! I'm your basic average guy and I'm here to save your life. You can't stop me because I'm Da Booomb. There is nothing I can't do and when danger comes…"
"Drew! You're not the lead singer. How many times do I have to tell you that?" James grabbed back the microphone.
"You're good at the tuba. Stick to that!"
"Fine, but when we take our band to Nashville they're going to say, "Why can't the charming tuba player be the lead singer?""
"Because you stink!"
"He knows the song. Why can't he be the lead singer just to practice?" A teenage girl asked from behind the camera.
"Because I don't know how to play the tuba!"
"Just one more chance!"
"No!"
"And if you're going to be our manager, you have to be as little involved as possible."
"Whatever." The video went blank.
"We almost were famous until we sang that song. They told us to take it to Disney and that the tuba would be hard to pack in the tour bus." Golden Arrow looked at Drakken.
"Out of curiosity, what was the name of that song?"
"Fax me, Page me (the Guy Song), why?" War Hawk turned to Shego.
"That was your mom behind the video camera, wasn't it?" Shego looked at War Hawk.
"Maybe." Shego got up, ejected Drakken's tape, and inserted her own. This one wasn't one of her bests, but if Drakken didn't catch on soon she'd practically sleep her way to victory.
The camera was in night vision in a dark room. Judging by the slick brick walls, the simple cots, the iron bars, and the baggy jumpsuits Shego and Drakken were wearing, they were in prison. Shego sat giggling over Drakken, a pen in her hand. A loud snore made the on-screen Shego jump, but she relaxed. She quickly started scribbling a message on the back of his jump suit careful not to wake him.
She finished, closing the cap on the pen and standing up. Not a minute too soon, for Drakken was starting to wake up. He sat up, yawned, and stretched his arms out as far as they'd go. Scratching his butt shamelessly, he looked at Shego. The pen was hidden behind her back.
"Prison food sucks." He muttered, standing up. With his back to the camera they could now read what it said in permanent marker on his orange jump suit. Shego had written in all capitals in bold letters, "WILL RANT FOR WORLD".
"Good morning, Dr. Drakken." Shego said. He stared at her.
"What did you do to me?" The tape was cut short. Drakken looked at Shego, his expression priceless. Shego smiled nervously.
"I was bored out of my ever-loving mind. It was either that or kill something."
"You could have just asked me for the word search book."
"I'll never surrender." Monkey Fist crawled over to Shego and Drakken, all four paws on the floor.
"Again, that was an embarrassing tape of Drakken. Not you." War Hawk shoved Monkey Fist out of her spot like he had done to her.
"Please, the embarrassment was so obvious." War Hawk flashed Shego a helpless look. The jig was up and they were caught red-handed. Shego flashed her a look of determination. It isn't over yet, it seemed to say.
"I think there's something you girls aren't telling us." Gemini stared Golden Arrow down. She got back up with twice the intensity. Eventually, he broke away. She smiled at her minor victory. Ron's eyes locked with Kim's and guilt overwhelmed her. His fate lay in the hands of Drakken who didn't have a clue what he was doing, and they were cheating. Well, they were criminals.
Ron knew that look. Kim was guilty of something and her face was proof enough. So this wasn't how they played Blackmail! He had to tell Drakken, but how? Gemini and Monkey Fist were already subtly trying to clue him in on the girl's cheating. And now he was going to be stuck with them for maybe the rest of the night! Hmm, cute girls or arch foes? This might not be so bad after all…
"Drakken, can I speak to you privately?" Monkey Fist pulled him away before he could answer. He practically dragged Drakken to the middle of the hall and spun him around.
"Something's just not right!" He exclaimed.
"Got that right. How do you get video clips from a high security prison?"
"No, not that! Think about it. Though the videos have Shego in them they're embarrassing for you."
"War Hawk did say the most embarrassing tapes would win…"
"They're cheating! They're trying to keep the buffoon! Not far!"
"It isn't over yet. We can still win…if you have an embarrassing video of Shego." An evil grin slowly worked its way up Drakken's face.
"She'll wet herself, it's so embarrassing." They rushed back to the girls. They sat calmly, as though nothing was wrong.
"We've figured out your ingenious plot Shego. You were cheating the whole time! It's not about embarrassing yourself; it's about embarrassing your opponent." War Hawk glared at Shego. Told you it was over, she mouthed.
"Gee, you caught me. What humiliating thing do you have, me singing karaoke?" Just keep calm, Shego told herself. What thing could he possibly whip up of her?
It didn't take long for Shego's childhood to flash on the screen. There she was, peeking out from her corner. She was giggling like the age she was…three and a half years old. Oh no, oh no. Shego sank a little from her confident position. How the heck could he have gotten this tape? She had kept it under lock and key.
"And now we have Shego…" The toddler peeked out angrily form behind the wall.
"Aqua Lass." She insisted. Oh no, here it came.
"And now we have Aqua Lass performing the Nakie Girl Dance." With that, Shego's mother sealed her fate. Shego jumped out butt naked, still wet from her bath, and started hopping around. How did Drakken figure out how to get a blurry square over her butt when she had tried decades to do it?
"Nakie girl, girl, girl, Nakie girl. Nakie girl, girl, girl, Nakie girl." Her mother chanted as Shego hopped, shook, and waved around in circles in time to the "music".
"Nakie girl, girl, girl, Nakie girl! Nakie girl, girl, girl, Nakie girl!" Shego started chanting along, dancing enthusiastically, not knowing that it was wrong to dance around naked. The age of innocence, where had it gone? Suddenly, Shego's father scooped her up in a towel.
"Daddy, she was dancing." Mommy cooed, showing Shego's upset father and his daughter's outrage.
"Yeah, Daddy. I was dancin'." Shego pouted.
"No daughter of mine's growing up to be a stripper!" He proclaimed, drying Shego's raven hair.
"What's a stipper?" She asked.
"Nothing, just go get your clothes on." Shego wriggled from his grasp, racing down the hall blurry square and all.
"You take the fun out of everything." Her mother teased.
"And you put it back in ten times worse." Shego's father reached over and shut off the video camera. The screen went blank and all eyes were on Shego, who had by this time been reduced to a lump on the ground. Mischief doubled over, a loud blast in the silence. Shego made sure that a green fireball would shut her up.
"This opens so many opportunities and so many questions." Metaphor said.
"Who's Aqua Lass?" Golden Arrow looked at Shego as though the answers were written on her face.
"You don't want to know, trust me."
"Wow, I never had a Nakie Girl dance."
"Listen, Kimmi. You can go home alive or I could deliver your dead carcass through FedEx."
"I don't think you could."
"You'd be surprised." But in the midst of Shego and Kim's argument, the screen flashed back on another image of Shego. They all turned around, not expecting there to be more.
An unsteady hand showed a scene with a boy dressed in long brown rags and another person with black clothing (including a cape) and a Darth Vader Voice Changer helmet. Two toddlers off to one side started trying to play the Star Wars theme music on their cheap kazoos. A bush rattled, signaling yet another person.
"Luke…" The person in black breathed deeply.
"…do you want fries with that?" The boy in brown started laughing.
"That's not in the movie!" He said.
"I know, but if this whole ruler of the universe thing doesn't work out I need a backup."
"Okay, this time it's for real." The boy walked off camera and then came back on.
"Recreation of Star Wars; take two. Action!" Kim caught War Hawk's voice behind the camera.
"I'm ready to defeat you, Darth Vader!" The boy pulled out a green toy light-saber and pressed the sound button.
"Luke, come to the dark side. I'll give you candy." The boy bit his lip, trying hard not to laugh.
"Never!" He shouted dramatically.
"Fine, but you'll be the cause of our family breaking up!" Darth Vader pulled out a green light-saber.
"Wait this one's Yoda's. Yoda!" Darth Vader tossed it to a hand that snaked out of the bush. Darth Vader pulled out a red light-saber and activated the sound.
"Much better." Darth Vader mumbled. They began fighting though it was really fake-looking.
"You broke up our family! When Mom died, you sent my sister to a different planet. I don't even know what she looks like!" Luke had Darth Vader on the ground, his light-saber inches from Vader's helmet.
"Luke, in that case I have very bad news for you. I am your sister!"
"Nuh-uh, you're totally my father…" Luke flipped the helmet off.
"Oh my gosh, it's my long-lost sister!"
"Your long-lost TWIN sister! Imagine that!"
"Shego, you're not my twin. The Ewoks over there are twins." The kazoo-playing boys giggled.
"Hego you do not get role play. Leia and Luke are twins in the movie. I know we're not twins."
"Oh right. Then where's our father?"
"Getting groceries."
"No, Darth Vader."
'Um, he got killed by the emperor?"
"Works for me." Suddenly, the final boy came out of the bushes and jumped on top of "Darth Vader".
"Mego, get off!" Darth Vader grunted.
"Yoda, I am. Mego, I have never heard of."
"I'm supposed to beat up Shego, Leia, Darth Vader. Whoever the heck she is."
"Daddy, who is your? Your daddy, I am! Your daddy, I am!"
"Yoda doesn't always speak backwards." Shego got herself away from her brothers.
"Wait, Yoda's supposed to be our dad? I thought, never mind." Hego shook his head.
"Steal the spotlight, I shall. Steal the movie, Yoda does." Mego spun his light-saber around wildly, hitting one of the Ewoks in the head.
"Better stop the idiot-cy right now. This movie is Rated SBR, for stupid beyond repair. Coming out the year Hego has his wedding reception." There was giggling from War Hawk and then she turned it off. Shego rushed to the VCR and ejected the home video.
"I believe that was your turn." Drakken smirked at Shego.
"One clip per turn." Killigan spoke up. Shego looked at War Hawk.
"But I didn't know…I mean…argh!" Shego stared at the ground, defeated. Drakken slapped high fives with all of the boys.
"Doesn't really matter, because the girls won." Artica pointed out.
"How? The Nakie Girl Dance was way better than being knocked over by some confused Pixie Scouts!"
"I said, and I quote, "whoever has the most embarrassing tapes win". I didn't say if it was based on quality or quantity. With a four to two victory, Shego wins." It was the girl's turn to cheer as the loop hole formed.
"But we had equal turns…and I didn't know…and…but…YOU CHEATED! YOU CHEATED!"
"How is it cheating if we don't tell you the rules and you don't get it until halfway through the game?" Shego pointed out, savoring Drakken's confused/infuriated look. Dementor looked where War Hawk had slid the quarter determining who would go first. He examined it, flipping it over and over in his palm.
"It's a two-tailed quarter." He said, showing it to everyone.
"You made sure Drakken would go first so he wouldn't get it until much farther in the game." Shego and War Hawk exchanged glances.
"I still don't consider that cheating. Just a clever trick." Drakken glared at Shego, bruised ego and all. She had beaten him…again. No matter what he did, Shego did it five times better. Plus, why did she still want the buffoon other than to torment him?
"What about us?" Mischief pouted, sounding like Donald Duck.
"What do you mean?"
"Hello, so far only you and Drakken have been duking it out with Blackmail. And you haven't even been using traditional rules." Metaphor pointed out. Shego's grin almost covered her face.
"We'll have to use our own tapes, since the guys have no clue what they're doing." Artica decided.
"So, who's going first?" No one answered at first. But then, War Hawk made her move towards the VCR. She put in her tape, after tossing Shego back hers.
The camera showed just Shego, sitting down drinking a beverage.
"Do you ever turn that camera off?" Shego asked the camera person.
"Every moment is precious, especially on tape." War Hawk replied, again behind the camera. She wheeled the camera up to show Golden Arrow walking towards them. Her sweatshirt tied around her waist and it seemed as though she was trying to hide something.
"Yo." Shego greeted.
"Shego, you're my best friend, right?"
"And War Hawk." Shego pointed to the camera.
"Who needs to get a life beyond making ours miserable on camera." Golden Arrow turned back to Shego.
"And best friend do whatever they can to help one another, right?"
"I don't know where this is going, but I already think you've got the wrong girl."
"Anyway, if a friend, oh say wet her pants; you'd help her out, wouldn't you?"
"Is this hypothetical?"
"No, this is actually literal." Golden Arrow unfolded her sweatshirt, showing a big wet spot.
"Who were you sitting by?"
"Does it really matter?"
"It does if you want dry undies." Golden Arrow sighed.
"Hego, okay just give me the pants so I can change."
"Maybe the new haunted roller coaster is scarier than we thought." Shego pulled out fresh pants from her bag. Golden Arrow took them and marched away.
"Shego wonders why we bring extra pants. Shego's question has now been answered."
"Be careful, they're mine!" Shego called after Golden Arrow blowing off War Hawk.
"I am shutting this off now since no one cares about me anymore." Indeed, the camera turned off and the screen went blank.
"I say we do no-dares Blackmail." War Hawk popped out the tape.
"I agree. Who's next?" Killigan stepped up to the VCR and shoved his tape in.
"It takes a real man to do this." He muttered.
Little Duff stood in the middle of the field, not looking much like a wide receiver. His helmet was too big and his shoulder pads kept slipping.
"That's my boy." A male voice came from behind the camera. He ran a little, but suddenly stopped and waved, seeing his parents in the bleachers.
"Hi, Terry." A woman, most likely his mother, waved at Duff. He waved back, right before all of the opposing team dog piled on him.
"Ouch!" The man seemed to wince. The tape was cut short. Duff, or should we say Terry, retrieved his tape and sat down.
"Your name's Terry? Isn't that a girl's name?" Drakken turned to Killigan.
"It can go either way, Drew." Duff growled.
"No wonder he calls himself Duff Killigan." Shego said. Kim was halfway to the VCR before anyone noticed she was up there.
"You have Blackmail?" Shego asked. Kim nodded.
"And it's about you." The tape played.
It looked pretty typical. Shego was sitting on the couch mindlessly flipping channels. She would pause for a few seconds, flip, watch for a few more seconds…stop. She set down the remote and intently watched, fascinated by something. Soon, the Barney theme song played almost torturingly.
"Wow, this is one of the old ones. Without the squirrel and bird things." She mumbled. And then, catching everyone off-guard, Shego opened her mouth and…
"I love you, you love me. We're a great big family. With a great big hug and a kiss from me to you. Won't you say you love me, too?" Shego sang along with the purple dinosaur absent-mindedly. Shego ran to the VCR and ejected it. As soon as that was done, she smashed the tape until it was reduced to a small pile of rubble.
"Oh…my…gosh." Drakken's mouth hung open like a Venus fly trap.
"I had no idea…" Kim managed to stop herself from laughing. This was brilliant! She knew that tapping into Drakken's security cameras was a good idea, even though it felt invasive at the time.
"Kimberly Ann Possible! You are as good as six feet under after this sleepover!" Shego's hands burned with flames and Kim was shocked as her full name came out of Shego's mouth.
"You in trouble now!" Mischief mocked Shego with a Spanish accent. So she could blend voices, too? War Hawk and Golden Arrow raced to hold Shego back.
"Calm down, it was just a tape."
"Just a tape." Shego breathed deeply. It made no sense to be angry. Not right now, anyway.
"Who's going next, while we try to calm Shego?" Gemini stood up, though a little intimidated by Shego's outburst. He walked over to the VCR and put his own in. War Hawk and Golden Arrow forced Shego to sit down as the tape unfolded.
The camera showed Gemini in front of the mirror, a towel around his waist and a shower cap on his head. He hummed a little before he started to sing off-key.
"Oh baby, baby. How was I supposed to know, that something wasn't right? Oh baby, baby. I shouldn't have let you gooooo. And now that you're out of sight, yeah. Show me how you want it to be. Show me baby, 'cause I need to know now what we've got. My loneliness is killing me." And, of course, Gemini had to sing the background singer's part with a voice that could break glass.
"And I, I must confess. I still believe, still believe. When I'm not with you I loose my mind, give me a sign! Hit me baby one more time!" Gemini danced a little before the camera woman just had to ask…
"Sheldon, what are you doing?" He jumped up in the air as he faced her, his towel nearly dropping.
"Singing Britney Spears, do you mind?" Gemini ripped off the shower cap.
"You hate Britney Spears."
"Maybe if you wouldn't play her non-stop, Betty, I wouldn't be singing her song."
"You like her, don't you?"
"I'm a grown man; I do not like Britney Spears."
"Do too."
"Do not."
'Do too."
"Do not."
"Do too, infinity."
"Whatever!" Gemini slammed the door on her.
"Do the world a favor and get dressed." The tape ended abruptly.
"It's okay to admit it, dude." Motor Ed patted Gemini comfortingly on the back.
"I don't like her, okay?"
"Did that make you feel better, Shego?" Golden Arrow asked her. She nodded her head.
"Can you play nicely with the other girls now?" Shego shook her head.
"Nice isn't in my vocabulary."
"Oh yeah, I forgot."
"Let's do one more tape and call it a game." The others agreed.
"I'll do it." Shego stood up and grabbed one. It was her absolute favorite.
"This person is not here hopefully but I just love this." Shego put in the final tape of the night.
It showed Shego herself standing outside of the door, looking in.
"Are you ready for some wild adventures?" She pulled an Australian accent off.
"Right here, in this room, is a wild tigress. She is, nor ever will be, tame so watch you fingers." The camera swooped into the room with the hybrid Tigress herself in it. He leg stood erect with her face turned away. Aggressively, Tigress licked the inside of her right thigh.
"For years, cats have been known to clean themselves using their sandpaper-y tongues. This is a perfect example of one such activity. Cats have also been known to clean their butts, go over, and lick someone. Watch as she attacks an evil spot of dirt with her canines." Tigress had seemed to find a spot of dirt and was nibbling at it. The camera turned back to just Shego.
"And so, we leave Tigress to bathe her privates in peace."
"Two things; one, it's her inner thigh not her butt." Kim recognized Golden Arrow's voice.
"Two, you have two seconds to apologize." Shego stared at the camera dumbfoundedly.
"What?" Tigress pounced on top of Shego, pinning her on the ground. Shego's hands just barely held the feline's rage away from her face. Gnashing teeth were too close for comfort.
"Oh man! Her breath is butt flavored!" Shego still managed to keep her Australian accent.
"And this is how nature should be. The prey teases the predator, the predator attacks the prey, and the prey gets her butt whupped. This is all for this week, next week we'll be wrestling komodo dragons at the zoo." Golden Arrow closed up and the tape stopped.
She listened from her hideout to them laughing. She had thought it had been ingenious to have girls and boys having a sleepover on the same night. The pranks they pulled were sidesplitting, and they had even played her favorite game. But, this was too far. This was where she drew the line. When they made fun of her and her instincts, they played with a bull by the horns. Or rather, a tiger by her tail.
&&&&&
Well, that was fun. Many times I had to stop and just laugh at the ridiculous things me and Charchee made up. It was her idea to make Drakken not know what Blackmail was. And the jail one was her idea, too. Please do not nitpick. My (nerdy) brother has already made sure to inform me that the Emperor didn't kill Darth Vader. He obviously didn't get that they were just looking for an excuse. I mostly picked up the Star Wars information from the little bit I watched, so don't sue if I got something wrong. And, for the record, I DO NOT WATCH BARNEY NOR WILL I EVER! Sorry, Charchee kept teasing me about that. Please review and leave out the nitpicks. P.S. I know I probably got the Britney Spears song wrong. Sorry about that, too.