Sassy: Hey, guys! Sorry we haven't updated this since, uh …
Tom: December.
Angry Kitty: Shit, it's been that long?
Flipper: WE HAVE EXCUSES! Finals, school ending-
Angry Kitty: I went to Europe!
Tom: Yeah, stupid ho left us …
Sassy: But enough of that! ON WITH THE STORY!
Disclaimer: We don't even own our PENCILS, okay? We stole them from the STAR Test! (inside joke) CHAPTER FIVETom launched herself at Satoshi, glomping him hard enough to crack a few ribs. Outwardly, he showed nothing but minor annoyance and shoved her off of him.
"Right then. Since all of you are clambering for answers, let's get to it!" Tom said, sounding (gasp) cheerful.
Angry Kitty nodded, continuing to play with Daisuke's hair. "Well, for one reason or another, you all ended up here."
"So prepared to attempt to live through the scariest night of your lives!" Sassy chirped, her words accented by a flash of lightening and the boom of thunder.
"We've separated you into groups, and we'll see which group survives under the conditions we've made," Flipper continued soberly, but ruined it by laughing.
Tom continued, "We've cut the power lines-"
"The phone lines-" Angry Kitty continued.
"And the gas lines in all the cars!" Sassy finished brightly.
"You're stuck here. There are also going to be demons running around who can," here Tom paused, "and WILL kill you."
Angry Kitty snickered evilly, "I hope you all watch horror movies, 'cause the rules are the same."
Several confused members of the group blinked. "'Rules?'"
"We'll give you a hint," Flipper said.
In unison, the four girls stated, "Don't split up."
And everything went black.
IIIIIIIIIII
Akito jolted out of a deep sleep and began yelling something about pink ponies and glitter, despite having duck tape over his mouth. He remembered where he was and got supremely pissed off.
"I HATE PLANES!!!!" He shrieked, the only thing audible beneath the duct tape.
The red-haired flight attendant briskly shot him up with more tranquilizers as she walked by, barely pausing. It had been three hours, and she was used to his chronic yelling.
Oh yeah, Akito is so weak and sickly.
IIIIIIIIIII
Hatori sat up slowly, taking in his surroundings carefully. After getting their hint, he had blacked out. And so, apparently, had everyone else. Kisa and Kyo were sprawled to his left, and the red head that Dark had changed into, through some sort of magic or curse (He wasn't surprised, since he turned into a seahorse every time a girl hugged him) was slowly waking up in front of him.
He climbed gracefully to his feet and began waking the others up, calming Kyo down and comforting Kisa.
"Hey kid. What's your name?" Kyo asked the red head bluntly.
"Daisuke Niwa," he replied, warily eyeing his surroundings.
Angry Kitty burst through the only window in the room suddenly, soaked to the bone. After muttering a few curses, she immediately called for their attention.
As if she didn't have it already.
"Hello minions! Welcome to the last night of your lives! We-that is to say, I-will be monitoring your actions. If you break the rules, you get fed to a demon."
"What rules?" Hatori asked icily.
She just smirked and gave the trembling Kisa a hug. "You've seen horror movies, haven't you? Don't be the dumbass main characters that get themselves killed." With a wink, she was out the window. "Ta ta for now!"
IIIIIIIIIII
On the other side of the Sohma complex, Hiro was bitching. What else is new? Too bad nobody was listening but Tohru. Yuki and Ayame were (couhgcough) bonding.
"And what gives THEM the right to-"
"OUR BROTHERLY LOVE-!"
"SHUT UP!!!!!" A new voice roared, startling everyone into compliance. Sassy had leapt into the fray, angry at being ignored. "Thank you! Yeesh, you'd think some of ya would learn to shut the hell UP!" She fumed.
"You should learn to shut up, it's not like you've ever said anything useful!" Hiro spat.
With a hug and a cloud of smoke, sheep-Hiro stomped his hooves, but stayed silent.
"Now anyways. Welcome to your last night, because ya'll are probably gonna die!" Sassy said brightly.
"How can we keep from dying?" Yuki asked.
"Follow the rules."
Tohru asked politely, "What rules?"
Sassy scowled. "Don't you people watch horror movies? Just imagine you're in, what, Scream or Saw or whatever and don't make mistakes that'll get you killed! Okay? Bye." And with that, she disappeared.
Or, rather, fell down a plot hole that the authors are too lazy to fill.
IIIIIIIIIII
Momiji babbled (in German) to Haru excitedly, while Kagome was trying to find a way out of the room they were in.
There was a puff of smoke, and Flipper was clinging to a transformed Haru. After Momiji explained the curse to Kagome, Flipper cleared her throat.
"Watch out for any demons!" And with that, Flipper skipped out of the room the same was she came in.
A not-so-subtle trap door in the floor.
IIIIIIIIIII
As for the rest of them? Inuyasha was causing a scene and yelling something about jewel shards and Satoshi was watching his frenzied movement out of bleary eyes (DAMN LOW BLOOD PRESSURE!!!!!). Shigure was scribbling in a little notebook and cackling.
Tom walked in through the door of the room, two fingers held up in a salute. "Yo."
"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE?" Inuyasha yelled, unsheathing his Tetsuiga.
Too bad Tom was human. It stayed a rusty old blade.
"FUCK!!!"
"Well if you're done throwing a temper tantrum," Tom turned to the rest of them. "Welcome, blah blah blah, you're probably going to die. Shigure, you watch horror movies, right?"
He grinned.
"You know how the hero/heroine always does things like, run up the stairs when they should be getting out of there? Or how they go to investigate the "strange thumping" and get knifed? Don't make the same mistakes, and make sure no one else makes them." She walked out, giving a short wave.
Inuyasha began demanding answers from Shigure, and Satoshi began showing signs of life.
And Shigure …
Well, he was Shigure.
IIIIIIIIIII
The four members of the CuteCrittersGang observed the large collection of monitors that showed what each of their groups are doing.
"Man Tom, Flipper," Angry Kitty sighed. "It sucks you have such a small group."
"Yeah, they'll probably all get picked off!" Sassy nodded sympathetically.
"Nuh-uh!" Flipper glowered.
"At least they aren't stupid, like the members of YOUR groups," Tom replied, "At least mine'll last longer than yours."
"No way!"
"Mine will!"
"You wanna bet?"
There was a pause, before all four girls got a gleam to their eyes.
Tom let a slow smile spread across her face. "You're on."
ENDAngry Kitty: And the drama continues!
Tom: We'll start revealing the rules next chapter … maybe.
Sassy: And characters will be slowly picked off.
Flipper: I can't wait!
Yuki: CRAP! THIS IS ALL CRAP!
Angry Kitty: When the hell did you get here?
Dark: I agree with the girly-boy.
Yuki: You wanna see just how girly I am?
Dark: Are you challenging me?
Yuki: (proceeds to beat his ass with mad martial arts moves)
Sassy: We're not impressed. Women do martial arts, too!
Tom: WE ARE NOT WORTHY OF YOUR KIND WORDS! The Girly Man, Inu, ireina15963, and americarose. We appreciate everyone who reviews, thank you so much!
Daisuke: (treating Dark's injuries) Man, you were BEAT Dark!
Dark: Shaddup, this is technically you're body, too!
Angry Kitty: YOU BEAT UP OUR SUPREMELY CUTE DAISUKE?
Sassy: YOU'RE GOIN' DOWN, BITCH!
(Both jump Yuki and start whipping his ass)
Flipper: FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!
Tom: You know explosives are better than violence.
Everyone else: SHUT UP!
Tom: Whatever. Remember to review, 'kay?